Toys and Tops
by Ri Mac

The only sounds that filled the room were the crinkling of a newspaper and a steadily increasing level of humming. Cara looked up at her sister, to find her humming along to whatever song was in her head, and deliberating over the personals section of the Townsingowa Gazette.

Suddenly, at the top of her lungs, Alana started singing, “I bless the rains down in Africa. Gonna take some time to do the things we never haaaaaaaaaaaaad, mmmhmmm.”

“Is that really necessary?” Cara sighed, “It’s a little early for karaoke.”

“You know I always sing Toto when I’m focused,” replied Alana with a smile.

“I guess that explains the singing I hear from your bedroom late at night,” said Cara causing Alana to blush.

“That’s just a solo performance, you should hear the duet,” she explained, this time triggering a similar blush in Cara.

“Is that why are you looking at the Personals instead of the jobs, like you claimed you were?”

Alana knew she had been caught out, so figured it was better to tell the truth, rather than make up excuses. She reminded Cara of the circumstances of her most recent break up, and rationalised that this could be a way to overcome the tag of “prude and unexciting sexual partner” that her last girlfriend had given her.

Cara sympathised, as she knew how badly she had taken the break up and pointed out one that caught her eye.

“This one sounds… interesting. ‘Professional with a passion for the exotic seeks someone to fulfill BDSM fantasy.’”

“Let’s not get that interesting. I think this one sounds more my speed.” Alana pushed the newspaper over to Cara and pointed at the one near the bottom.

Play with Me!
“Toy” store owner searching
for adventurous partner
willing to try new things.

After quickly reading the ad, and realising that it was the most sedate of them all, Cara inquired, “Are you sure about this. This doesn’t really sound like your sort of thing.”

“I’ve read a lot of stories about this. I think I know what I am getting into.”

“I’ve read some of the erotica stuff you’ve left around. You might have to call her Daddy. ‘Oh Daddy, harder. Overpower me with you butchness. Can I cum now? Oooooooooo. Thank you Daddy. Thank you, THANK YOOOOU!!!’.” Cara moans and writhes with her best Meg Ryan impression.

“Firstly, I don’t think that happens in real life. Secondly, why are you reading my lesbian fiction?” inquired Alana.

“You never answer my questions about lesbian sex, so I have to research instead.” Cara said with a smile, before continuing, “I’m thinking, I might be able to learn some handy sex tips for Julian to use on me.”


The bell above the door lightly chimed, as Alanna stumbled through the entrance of the coffee shop.

"Damn it," Alana said to herself, ”Stupid step. So much for making a good first impression."

She looked around at the other café dwellers, to see if she could spot the elusive Brenna. Alana soon caught a glimpse of a tall, blonde, leather-clad woman with piercings, and headed over towards her, convinced she was the ‘toy’ store owner from the ad.

“Hi.” Alana exclaimed. “You must be Brenna.”

The statuesque blonde rose from her seat and proceeded to look Alana up and down, her eyes lingering on her breasts.

“I’ll be Brenna if you want me to be” she declared, licking her lips. “I’ll be anyone you want, sexy.”

Alana was taken aback. When talking to Brenna on the phone, she didn’t get the impression that she was sleazy or creepy.


With a feral grin, the towering blonde, patted the seat in the booth beside her and said, “What don’t you sit you lovely self right here, and get to know each other better.”

While Alana was contemplating the best escape plan, another voice interrupted them.

“Excuse me. I believe you are looking for me. We talked on the phone yesterday.”

Alana stopped staring fearfully at the blonde Goliath, to have a quick look at her saviour. Her David.

After taking in the picture of the adorable, short blonde standing beside her, Alana faced the lofty and scary bleach blonde, saying, “Looks like my date is here.” Alana put her arm through that of her liberator, and allowed herself to be led away to one of the back booths.

‘“Please have a seat. Can a get you a coffee or something? Some cake maybe?”

“I’m not staying. Thanks for rescuing me and all, but I need to get away from that creep. I certainly didn’t get that impression talking to her on the phone.” Alana turns to leave, before being stopped by a hand on her arm.

“I’m glad I was able to save you, but I meant it. We talked on the phone yesterday. I’m Brenna.”

“Oh. My. I wonder who she was then?” Alana said absently, “Sorry. You weren’t what I was expecting. I thought you would be taller.”

“Everyone says that. I do my job perfectly well at my height. Why don’t you sit, and I’ll get you a drink.”

“A white chocolate raspberry mocha with cream, would be lovely thanks.”

While Brenna went to order the drink, Alana took the time to take in the other woman. Her eyes raked over the short fair haired woman, taking in how well her arse looked in her tailored pants, and thinking about how lovely and green her eyes were.

Alana mumbled to herself, “Certainly not what I expecting. But I bet she would look good in leather.”

In next to no time, Brenna rejoined Alana at the table, and had taken the seat opposite her.

“I hope you don’t mind this meeting at this café. With all my new equipment being delivered, this seemed a quieter spot so we could concentrate on whether we both want the same things in a possible partnership.” After a quick pause and a wide grin, Brenna adds, “Plus the coffee is better then anything I could ever make.”

Brenna shuffled the papers before her, and took a sip of her double choc latte, with caramel flavouring, extra froth and chocolate sprinkles on top.

“I thought we should meet today and talk about why you think you would be right for this position, and what sort of knowledge you would bring to this partnership.”

“That sounds fine.”

“Just a few questions. They are relatively harmless.” After an acquiescent nod from Alana, Brenna continues, “On a scale of 1 to 10, how adventurous would you say you are?”

Alana pauses to consider the question before replying, “Probably about a 4. But I am willing to try new things and experiences, and want to be more adventurous as a whole.”

Brenna jotted down a note, “Fair enough. You seem enthusiastic. What sort of equipment are you used to?”

Alana turned a lovely shade of red, “Nothing significant. Just the things one keeps at home.”

“Hmmm.” Brenna wrote something else down, “When we are done here, I can take you to the store and give you a go on my equipment, and see how you feel about it.”

A look of some distress, arrived suddenly on Alana’s face, as she tried desperately, not to let her fear show through.

“And what about your familiarity with ropes?” Brenna picked up where she left off.

“Uh. No.” Alana shakes her head side to side.


No response from Alana this time.


A really frightened look, that she couldn’t conceal, fell across Alana’s face, and a silence descended between them.

After a couple of awkward minutes, Alana said, “Look. I lied to you on the phone. I’ve never done anything like this before.”

“Oh I really was looking for someone with more experience.” A disappointed Brenna replied.

“I didn’t think that it would be a problem. As I said earlier I am a quick learner, and I can follow orders.”

Brenna scribbled something on her notepad, “Is there anything else you want to add?”

“I refuse to call you Daddy.”

Brenna’s head snapped up quick and gave Alana a very strange look. “I wouldn’t expect you too. Brenna or Bren is just fine.”

After some consideration, Brenna continued, “You are the best response to the ad so far, so I guess if you are willing, and enthusiastic, we should consider the financial side of things.”

“What! I have to pay?” Alana exclaimed, quite horrified.

“Of course. Did you really think I would just give it too you for free.”

“The ad never mentioned you were a…” Alana looked around surreptitiously, before continuing in a whisper, “Prostitute.”.

Brenna slowly closed her notebook, and calmly stood up, before coolly stating, “I don’t know what is up your butt, but I don’t need this. I can find a business partner somewhere else.”

With composure she wasn’t really feeling, Brenna started to walk away from the table.

“What? Huh? Business? I don’t understand?”

Brenna stopped and turned around. “You don’t understand? Neither do I. Why would you reply to my ad if you were only going to insult me? I don’t need this, and my business doesn’t need this. Goodbye.”

“No wait. Don’t go. I think there has been a misunderstanding.” Alana pleaded.

“What sort of misunderstanding? The ad very clearly stated that I was looking for someone to buy into my business.”

“It didn’t really.” Alana looked down shyly, reached into her purse and withdraw the paper with the ad in it. She carefully slid it across the table, where Brenna was standing and showed it too her. “I thought it was about… You know.” Alan stammered, as a rosy flush came over her.

Brenna slowly read the ad, and a change came over her face.

Very calmly, Brenna said, “Could you just excuse me a moment.” She walked a few steps away from table, dialling her mobile phone, while muttering to herself, “I’m going to kill that lazy good for nothing son of a b…. Davey? I’m going to kill you this time, you lazy good for nothing son of a b… Uh huh. Ok. That doesn’t mean that… Uh huh. Ok. Uh huh. I love you too. But Davey? Next time I will hurt you. Bye.”

After slowly walking back to the table, Brenna said in disbelief, “It seems, due to my lazy brother and a mix up at the paper, my ad for a business partner came out as an ad seeking a partner for bondage.”

Following a fleeting moment of silence, Brenna resumed thoughtfully, “At least it explains some of the wacky phone calls I have been receiving.”

2 days earlier at the Townsingowa Gazette…

The hum of various voices culminated into a low rumble, that permeated the local paper’s classified call centre. One voice could be heard slightly above the rest saying, “Are you sure that’s all you want to put in, sir? Ok, I just wanted to clarify. Thank you sir, it will be in the paper tomorrow. Have a nice day.”

“Tyson!” A voice shouted from a nearby office, “Get your arse in here.”

A troubled look came over the young mans face, as he typed in the last of the classified he just received, and then hurried over to see his big boss.

When Tyson left his desk, two of his co-workers approached his office space to sneak a peek at what was written on his computer.

“Wanna mess with him?” John said with a smile.

“Sounds good. Let’s do this.” Joan agreed, as she stealthily leaned over his desk, and started fiddling with his computer. “We’ll put some inverted commas in here. And change it from ‘Business Opportunities’ to ‘Personals’.”

“He’ll probably go over it again, before submitting it anyway.”

“It will still be funny though. Done. We better go before he comes back.”

With that, the two troublemakers hastily returned to their desks, just in time to see Tyson return in foul mood.

“Thinks he’s God.” Tyson mumbled under his breath, “I need a new job.”

Without looking at the classified, he pressed the submit button, before continuing to grumble.

“Oh shit.” John said, “He didn’t re-check it.”

Brenna refocussed on the conversation at hand. “Look, can we start again?”

“Good idea.”

“Good afternoon. My name is Brenna. I am looking for someone to buy into my toy store business. And when I say toy, I mean children’s toys. Though I am extending to include outdoor and adventure equipment. My centrepiece, a climbing wall.” Brenna finished with a flourish of her arms.

“It’s nice to meet you Brenna. I’m Alana, I consider myself very adventurous, have experience with rock climbing, ropes and harnesses, and am interested in hearing more about your business.”

Brenna gave a wide smile, to the brunette sitting opposite her, glad they had had an opportunity to sort out the misunderstandings and confusion between them. “Why don’t we head over to my shop, and I’ll show you my plans and we can talk some more. No funny business. Promise.”

A flood of disappointment ran through Alana’s body, to hear that there wouldn’t be anything but business between her and the delightfully adorable blonde, but realised that this was a really good business opportunity, and that trying to complicate it with anything else wouldn’t be a smart idea.

“Excellent suggestion,” Alana said as she stood, “Lead the way.”

Brenna escorted Alana through the refurbishments and extension of her shop, ‘Toys and Tops’, pointing out her big plans for the future. Alana was genuinely impressed with what she seeing, and was seriously considering entering in a partnership with Brenna.

“While we are here, do you want to have a turn on the climbing wall? I have some spare clothes and some shoes for you.” Brenna inquired, eager to see it Alana was experienced in this field.

“Really? That sounds great.”

Both ladies went to separate rooms to change, and before too long, had met again at the bottom of the climbing wall.

“Would you like to go first?” Brenna asked the tall brunette beauty, while trying not to stare at all the leg on show. “I’ll be your anchor.”

Alana smiles happily before chalking up her hands and considering the best route up the wall. After making a decision, she placed her hands on the wall, and put her left foot in the first notch.

As Brenna watched Alana slowly progress up the wall, she became away of a steadily increasing level of humming.

From slightly above her head, Brenna heard Alana start singing, “Gonna take a lot to drag me away from you. There’s nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do.”

Brenna quickly joined it, “I bless the rains down in Africa. Gonna take some time to do the things we never haaaaaaaaaaaaad, mmmhmmm.”

Alana, startled by hearing the singing below her, lost her grip on the wall, and felt herself slipping. Though only several feet above the floor, she wasn’t looking forward to hitting the mat.

Just before Alana thought she would hit the ground hard, two arms enveloped her, causing the two of them to tumble to the ground together, with Alana ending up lying breast to breast on Brenna.

“Thanks for being my cushion. It would have hurt otherwise.”

The women didn’t move from their position, content to continue to look into each others eyes. Alana slowly lowered her head, her lips aching to feel Brenna’s beneath them.

Just as there lips were about to touch, Brenna tilted her head to the side, and whispered in Alana’s ear, “Just one thing before we do anything else. I really don’t want to be called Daddy.”

-The End