You know, when I signed up to be a dog, I didn't expect it to be this kind of one. I thought more regal, along the lines of a Great Dane or even an Alsatian. But nooooooooooooo, I am what is called a Heinz variety 57; In other words, the mixture of my parentage is somewhat in question.
Even in my early days of looking around in bins and scavenging, I still had high hopes of climbing the dog tree of life, so to speak. I'd often sit by the canal, looking into the water, wondering why the dog in there had a bigger bone than I did, and I'd also wonder which human would come along and find me. Of course I expected royalty to be out of the question, it's not as if princes took walks along the railway track daily.
None of my dreams were to be. I was found by the dog catcher. The shame, the shame. I'd sit daily watching the groups of humans parading past my jail cell. Each one would look me up and down but pass me by. I'd been in the cells for nearly two months when fate took a hand. I was sitting doing my usual morning washing, wondering yet again where the two orbs between my legs had disappeared to, ones I'm sure I came in with, when I heard a scream, a scream so loud I nearly did something I hadn't done since I was a puppy; tiddle.
I jumped, whirling, looking for whatever had made the sound. I saw her, a young girl, clapping her hands, pointing into my cell. I looked over my shoulder, hoping to god she hadn't spotted a mouse.
"Do you like him?"
I turned, finding a dark haired fully grown one appear, and as human women go, not too shabby either.
The girl squealed again, her head nodding like a bobbing duck. I'd heard that some of their litters could be a bit funny.
I watched as another female of the species stepped up, this one was blonde, the same looks of the young girl, I surmised that this was the mother.
The two women grinned at the girl, moving together. I had also heard that this species did have only female couples. Well, it's not for me to judge, I once found a poodle alluring.
"Can we have him? Oh, please....please?"
A hand was thrust at my face, I at once smelt chocolate and began licking. The girl erupted into a fit of giggles and the elder ones into laughter. I frowned, chocolate was no laughing matter, I continued my licking.
"We'll take him."
That was two years ago. I have found a home, my own pack filled with laughter and with love. I am happy. Even on the days we play dress up.
I scratch at my ears. 'Damn it. Will these things never come off? Arghhhhhhhh.'
"Rufus. Stop that!"
I stick my tongue out.