Traumatic Love

BY Capt_Esq

Go to Chapter 1

I apologize for the HUGE delay between chapters. However, I will admit to being very similar to the character Sam in the story I wrote “Peconic Haven.” I too am Bi-polar, and it had gotten the better of me these last two years. Mix that with a new house and moving, and it created a jumble in my life. – Capt_Esq



The characters in the story are a product of my own. Any resemblance to others, living, dead or fictional is purely coincidental and not intentional. Locations are either fictional and/or adapted to the story.

Sex: Yes, including the aftermath of rape.

Thank you to my Betas, Lee, Naomi.

Archiving : This work is copy written and should not be posted anywhere else without the writer's expressed permission.

Feedback: Constructive criticisms or general remarks are greatly appreciated, so feel free to contact me at

Chapter Nine

Nydia sat at the foot of her bed freshly showered, dressed in her underwear and staring at the most of the contents of her closet. So far she had tried on four different outfits. Each of which she discarded onto the bed.


Now she was being forced to make a decision. Jo was due any minute to take her to dinner with her family.


At this moment, Nydia had no idea why she had agreed to go. The fact that Duncan and his wife would also be there only added to her nerves. She knew how important all of these people were to Jo. Nydia didn't want to risk messing this up. It was too important, to both of them.


What Nydia was having the most trouble with was deciphering her feelings towards Jo. When they were together, her heart fluttered and she felt a burning desire to touch Jo and be touched by her. On the days they were apart she felt an emptiness deep in her soul. All she wanted was to be with Jo. To bask in the feelings Jo evoked in her. Was it love? Nydia didn't know the answer to that question. She didn't know if she ever could. Nydia had never felt love. Except for the time she spent with her mother, she had nothing to reference. Nydia only knew she had never felt such deep feelings before, and she would rather lose her life then feel it end.


Glancing at the clock, Nydia realized she was almost out of time. She grabbed a pair of beige slacks and the green silk blouse that complimented her eyes. Buttoning the last button, the doorbell rang.




Nydia opened the door to find Jo standing on her doorstep. She slowly ran her eyes over Jo deciding she looked beautiful. She was wearing a pair of tight black jeans and a blue cotton oxford shirt that was almost as deep in color as her eyes. Jo stood taller than usual thanks to the black cowboy boots she wore. For a moment, the vision took Nydia's breath away leaving her speechless.


Jo asked with a small grin, “What's the matter? My socks don't match?”


Nydia swallowed to try and clear her dry mouth. “Uhm, no. It's just you look great.”


“Well, you look beautiful so we're even. Though in truth, I think you're ahead.”


Nydia felt a blush come to her face and she glanced away.


Jo asked, “Can we take your car. I think my tire is getting low, and I don't want to risk getting stuck on the side of the road with my precious cargo.”


“Precious cargo? What do you have?”


“You, I hope.”


Nydia gave Jo a shy smile. “Thank you.”


“You are always welcome. Are you ready to go?” Jo asked.


“Yeah, let me just lock up.”


After Nydia turned back around on the porch and Jo took her hand in hers. Jo pulled her up close and placed a gentle yet firm kiss upon Nydia's lips. As they broke apart, each breathing deeply, she said, “I've wanted to do that since the last time I saw you. You do something to me Nydia that no one else ever has.” Jo said, leaning her head down to rest her forehead against Nydia's


Nydia blushed again and took in a deep breath. “I feel the same way Jo. I can't understand it, and I don't think I want to. It scares me.”


“I scare you,” Jo said with a hurt tone.


“No. Jo. Not you,” Nydia said, as she reached up with her hand, and with a warm touch, placed it behind Jo's neck. “You have quickly come to mean so much to me. It's as if you are becoming my whole world. That's what scares me, not you,” she said just before their lips met again. The kiss was deep and passionate. The two women stood so close, held on so tight, that not a ray of light passed between them, as tongues dueled in a heated battle of want and need.


They had to break apart for lack of air. Jo placed her forehead against Nydia's and looked deep into her eyes. “I'm sorry about this week,” Jo said in a quiet voice.


“What do you have to be sorry about?” Nydia asked in confusion.


Jo stood up straight. Nydia noticed her eyes suddenly avert her own.


“Wednesday. That case. I'm sorry I messed up and it caused you to doubt me.”


“I should be the one apologizing here, Jo, not you. I should have known better. I should have believed in you. You've shown time and time again that you're more than the average police officer or detective. You truly care. I can tell that now. I knew it then, but I let my anger cloud my heart. I'm sorry I ever doubted you.”


“There's nothing to be sorry for, honey. I know you've had problems with the police in the past, and someday I hope you feel comfortable enough to share them. Until then I understand things like this may happen, but when you do tell me I know we will move on.”


“I will. Soon.”


“Okay, then let's get going. I can't wait for you to meet everyone.”


“All right, let's do this.”




As Jo parked Nydia's car in the driveway of Jo's home, Jo heard Nydia let out a deep sigh.


“You do know there is nothing to worry about. They'll love you.” Jo said, giving Nydia's hand a gentle squeeze.


“It's all right. I'm just a little nervous.”


“Well. Don't be. It'll be fine.”


Nydia straightened her shoulders and said, “Okay. Let's do this.”


“Babe, it's not a firing squad. Honest.”


Nydia let out a laugh, “I know. I'm just over-reacting.”


“Come on. I'll be right beside you.”


The two women got out of the car and walked up to the door. Jo opened it and within a moment heard the sound of raucous laughter coming from the kitchen. She knew that was where they would find everyone else. Her mother's kitchen was always the center of any event they had. Cassandra, Jo's mother, made it warm and inviting for anyone who entered their house. Jo was always amazed by it. When Jo was younger, her friends enjoyed the time spent at her mother's. She was always quick to embrace anyone then, and it still held true today.


Jo placed her hand at the small of Nydia's back and with a gentle hand, directed her towards the back of the house. As they entered the kitchen Jo saw all heads turn to look at them and in an instant, felt tension appear in the muscles beneath her hand. She leaned down so her mouth was close to Nydia's ear. “There is nothing to worry about, and just remember I'm here for you, always.”


“I know,” Nydia whispered.


Jo felt Nydia's hand clasp with hers and she gave it a gentle squeeze in reassurance. “Hi everybody, what are we missing?” Jo asked in an attempt to break the tension.


“Nothing but your mother sharing some of your more adventurous childhood tales,” Duncan 's wife, Maddy, answered.


“Oh God, shoot me now. Well, let me introduce everyone and then you can explain that to me.”


“Nydia, you know Duncan of course. This lovely woman with the smirk on her face is his wife, Maddy.” Jo said.


“Nice to meet you,” Nydia said.


Maddy pulled Nydia into a heartfelt hug. “It's our pleasure. It's nice to meet the woman who has become so important to Jo, and Duncan can't stop raving about your work at the hospital.”


“I see you left the munchkin home,” Jo said.


“Yes,” Maddy said. “Even though the little rugrat was loathe to let us go. Every time I walked away, he cried.”


“You should have brought him. You know I love seeing him.”


“I know, but today was grownup day. They happen so rarely.”


“Okay. Just promise next time.”


“Of course.”


Jo continued with the introductions. “This radiant woman here is my sister Electra.” Jo saw the frown that always followed appeared on Electra at the mention of the name. “Just don't call her that, if you value your person.”


“Just call me Ellie. Everyone does.” Jo's sister replied with a broad smile, the same one that Jo knew always lightened her eye color.


“Hi Ellie. It's great to meet you.”


“You, too.”


“And here we have, most of all, my mother Cassandra. The only person who can still kick my ass.”


“Language,” Cassandra said, as she swatted Jo on said body part.


Cassandra, reached out to Nydia and brought her in for a firm hug. “Welcome to our home, Nydia.”


“Thank you,” Nydia said.


Jo noticed Nydia's voice crack a little. Trying to relive some tension, and change the subject, Jo asked, “So, which story are we covering at the moment?”


“Just the one about you, Steven Wesley, and a case of indecent exposure.”


“It was an accident I swear, and it wasn't my fault that Mrs. Murphy was walking past with her dog at that moment.”


Electra let out a snort, “I think poor Brutus was emotionally scarred for life. As I recall, he never came near you again after that.”


“Brutus was a coward,” Jo said with a hearty laugh.


“Brutus was a seventy five pound Boxer.”


“He was still a baby about the whole thing.”


Jo heard Nydia chuckle next to her and it was music to her soul. She and bumped her in the shoulder. “No, comments from you either,” Jo said with a small laugh.


“Wouldn't dream of it, Lady Godiva.” Nydia said, as everyone in the room broke out in raucous laughter.


Jo glared at her, but the glare softened into a smile when Nydia poked her tongue out at Jo. “You're impossible, but I love you anyway.”


Nydia's eyes grew as big as saucers. “Uhm, did you just say you loved me?”


Jo rocked nervously from one foot to another.


Everyone seemed to sense the tension building in the room, and without almost any sound they filed out of the room. Leaving Jo and Nydia alone.


“I'm sorry Nydia. I didn't mean to say that.”


Tears welled up in Nydia's eyes. “Do you mean you don't love me?”


Jo didn't notice everyone leave the room. For now, the only thing that mattered was Nydia. What do I do now? She thought.


Nydia looked into Jo's eyes.


Jo could feel her heart beat increasing and thundering in her ears. Her panic must have showed, because Nydia turned away and began to sob.


“Nydia, please don't cry.” Jo said, as she reached out to touch Nydia's soft cheek.


Nydia backed away from the movement. “I'm sorry, Jo. I didn't mean to make this harder for you. I should just go. Please tell everyone I said goodbye. I don't think I could face them right now, I've made such a fool out of myself.” Nydia blabbered out, as Jo watched her try and gain some control over her emotions again.


Knowing she had to act fast, Jo took hold of one of Nydia's hands. “Nydia, please calm down. It's not what you think. I promise. Just give me a moment to explain.”


“Explain what, I think it's been made pretty obvious now.” Nydia said, as she wiped the tears away with the back of her hand.


Jo could hear the hurt in her tone, and it was causing a pain in her own heart. “But…”


“No, Jo. There's no need for you to say anything more. I'll just say goodbye to everyone and go.” Nydia said with a deep shuddering sigh. She looked up at Jo and said, “But just know that even if you don't love me, I was really starting to fall in love with you.” She wiped the final tears from her eyes. “Goodbye, Jo.”


Jo was stunned. She dropped her grip on Nydia's arm and let her turn to walk down the hall, and enter the side room. “She loves me.” Jo said out loud. A small smile formed on her face. It began to grow with each passing moment. Her mind tried to focus again and she quickly realized Nydia was no longer standing in front of her. “Oh, shit!” She said, as she took off after her akin to a bullet out of her own gun.


Jo entered the family room and came to a short stop. The sight of Nydia giving Cassandra a hug goodbye caused a pain in Jo's chest. They said something to each other in a quiet tone, and then Nydia made her way to the front door.


“Wait!” Jo called to her. “I have something to say. If you still want to go then fine, but I would like to think you would stay.”


Nydia stood with her hand on the doorknob, turned to face Jo. “Why would I want to stay? As I see it, there isn't much reason anymore. You've made that clear.”


Jo started to step forward in slow movements. “Because, I do love you. I truly and deeply do. I'm sorry I froze back there. I was scared. Scared that I had frightened you off. I thought it was too soon to say it and you would feel pressured in some way. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you like this. Please forgive me.” Jo begged. “I don't know what I would do if you left now.”


“You really love me?”


“Yes. I do,” Jo said, as she moved so she was mere inches from Nydia's body.


Jo saw tears come to Nydia's eyes.


“I'm sorry too.”


Jo stepped even closer. She reached out and wiped away a tear just as it began to fall. She leaned in and laid a gentle kiss on Nydia's lips. “Why did you. I know I should have said something as soon as you asked, but I thought you would have had more faith than that. I would like to think you would have given me a chance.”


“I know. I should have. It's just that no one has ever said that to me before. At least not since I was a little kid. I think I wanted to believe it so desperately, that when you faltered, I assumed you didn't really mean it.”


“Well, I do. I do love you.” Jo leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on Nydia's lips. A kiss full of promise and feelings of devotion.


As Jo pulled away, applause filled the air. She looked and saw Duncan with a smirk on his face and a twinkle in his eyes. She simply smiled back instead of reprimanding him. But now, things were different. Nydia loved her. That was all that mattered to her.


Jo turned around again just in time to see her mother take Nydia in her arms in a warm embrace.


“Welcome to the family. Now I have a nurse and a doctor as daughters,” Cassandra told her holding her at arm's length but not letting go.


Jo saw fresh tears run down Nydia's face which her mother wiped away, but Jo smiled knowing this time they were caused by love


To Be Continued

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