Disclaimers: The characters of Xena: Warrior Princess sad to say does not belong to me. They belong to Universal Studios, MCA and Renaissance Pictures. No intention of copyright infringement is intended. I am grateful they allow me the privilege to extend the pleasure of this wonderful show by writing this fanfiction for fun.
Subtext: Of course. What would any X/G story be without it? It is all about the love.
Sex disclaimer: No graphic sex. Maybe next time. However, if love and intense caring between two consenting adults who happen to be women offend you, or you are not of age or it is illegal in your state...well...you can click the mouse and return when you are older and wiser.
Author's note: I hope it is OK to name drop cause I did name names a few times in the story.
This reads like a script.
Time: circa l995
Place: Auckland, NZ
[Xena has just returned home after her first day's shooting of the show that bears her name.]
X: Hey, honey. I'm home. [Xena yells out to the little blonde whose back remains toward her as she continues peeling vegetables over the kitchen sink.]
G: Hey, backatcha. How was your day? [She perkily answers while offering her cheek to Xena who kisses it tenderly while grabbing a carrot slice from the bowl.]
X: Decent. What are we having for dinner? Bugs Bunny food?
G: I thought I'd make us some stir fry with vegetables. You need to watch what you eat from now on, my darling warrior.
X: What d'ya mean? [Xena pats her own flattened stomach and then reaches down to pinch Gabrielle's perfectly rounded buttocks.]
X: Now who has to watch what... did you say? (grinning)
G: No, Xena. I mean it's important for you to keep a high energy level. All that jumping and wire dangling stuff they make you do. Couldn't the stunt people do more of it?
X: Nah. It's fun. Makes it look real if I do it.
G: Well, you know I don't believe you should be risking your life for some stupid science fiction show.
X: Gabrielle...if this thing is supposed to take off it's gotta look real. Rob and Sam are taking a big chance putting me in this show.
G: I don't know about that. They've seen what you can do from Hercules.
X: Yeah. But my little lamb chop--- this show's different.
G: Oh c'mon, Xena. From what I gather you're just an ancient history version of Wonder Woman.
X: Where did you hear that one, my sweet? [sarcastically, of course]
G: I just so happened to be on my cell with Katherine Fugate today and she mentioned that you might be getting your ass kicked a few times by Caesar and some insane blonde named Calista or was it Callisto?
X: We don't know that yet. The scripts are still being discussed. As a matter of fact they haven't even decided whos going to play my sidekick yet. So they've had to resort to filming around that part.
G: What!? The great Xena is going to have a sidekick? Why? Superman didnt. Neither did Spiderman and what about Darkman...
X: They all had alter egos...
G: Well, maybe,,, but most sidekicks are always made to look inferior to the main hero. I pity the poor person who gets to play your sidekick.
X: Actually, Gabrielle, I was told by Beth from casting they are desperate for a sidekick. They just can't seem to find the right one. Do you know if any of your actor friends might want to try out for the part?
G: I would recommend Barbara Eden from "I Dream of Jeannie"---but I think she is tired of playing those fantasy roles.
X: Guess that can happen. You know I even suggested using a man.
G: No... that can't work. No great hero teams have had members of the opposite sex...unless they were comedians.
X: I thought that, too. That's why I suggested they get a guy in drag. But they all laughed at my idea. [pouting]
G: Too bad cause Salmoneus would have been perfect for the part.
X: Yeah...but I might have some kissing scenes. I don't want to be kissing Salmoneus.
G: [Suddenly piqued with curiosity] Really? How interesting. [Gabrielle begins fiddling with Xena's breastplate]
X: [Xena places her finger under Gabrielle's chin while gently lifting her face toward her] You know, honey bun, you used to be an actress before we met. Would you consider trying out for the part?
G: Well... we just might have to spend a lot of time practicing those kissing scenes. Now wouldn't we? [Spoken in a very seductive tone]
X: I'll call up the producers right now.... [Xena dials the number]
X: Hello, Liz.
....And the rest is....er...history.
Thanks for reading my story. Kind responses--and even the other kind---are welcomed. email@example.com
Return to the Academy