You can almost feel it

coil around you.


it slithers into the deep recesses

of your mind.

It feeds on joy and self esteem;

sucking you dry,

leaving misery, fear, and doubt

in their stead.

You become a stranger;


to family and friends,

and most especially to yourself,

frighteningly unsure

of who you are -

of who you were.

The past is alive.

It crawls across your

internal, infernal screen,

replaying constantly:

Why did I do that?

What could I have changed?

How could I have done that?

The present is blurred,

out of focus -


The future looms, unknowable.

The monster has you in its grip,

it won’t give up without a fight

and your inner strength is failing.

Hope is answer.

With its companion, love,

it enables you; emboldens you

to make a stand;

to try.



© Ellie Maziekien


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