Disclaimer: I own nothing! It makes me sad; I would love to own either Renee or Lucy for a day. (Wouldn’t we all) Anyway, they don’t belong to me. If you have a comment or question please e-mail me at Charlies_girl7681@yahoo.com (Be nice this is my first Xena fic) please use the word XENA in the title or else I will delete it as spam. Thanks!



by Fanofthearts


One would not expect Xena, Warrior Princess to have sweet smelling hair. To glance at her tough in her leather and steel, a person would think a musky smell would accompany her. But that is not so. At that moment my face was nuzzled into her thick black mane I inhaled and the slight smell of roses tingled at my nose. Tears silently slid down her face, she made no move to stop them, a rare display for the warrior. I pulled her closer, almost into my lap; to my surprise she cuddled into me. For a long moment neither of us spoke. I could tell she was lost in a time long since past. Her sob broke the silence. It started as a tiny ripple in her diaphragm, before spreading through out her whole body.            

“It will be alright.” I whispered into her ear, now pulling her fully into my lap.

“It hurt to walk,” She murmured into my neck “The blood was just starting to crust from labor. I felt like I had glass fragments pushed into me,” She paused nuzzling her nose into my neck, her lips brushing over my pulse point “I allowed myself to grieve only that night. I cried until morning, and then I had to go back into my role as a warrior just as if nothing had happened.” Her voice broke and my lips tenderly fluttered from her hairline down her temples. “The worst was the pain in my breasts. Just because the baby was gone didn’t mean the milk stopped. That horrible ache was there for weeks reminding me what I had done.”

Her tears fell in a fast hot stream down her cheeks. Boldly I turned her face to mine, I let my lips catch the tears, kissing franticly everywhere I could. “Its okay, it’s over, and you’re safe.”

“Can you understand why I can’t lose you?” Her cloudy blue eyes met mine “You are my everything Gabrielle, my light. If you leave me I will die.” Her voice rambled on, her arms clinging to me “The day I found you in Potadia I was going to end it all but then I saw this little fiery girl and she showed me that I could do good. You saved my life that day Gabrielle.”

The shock must have showed on my face because the corner of her lip twitched in a slight smile. I never knew that she was going to kill herself. The realization rocked me to my core and suddenly, looking into those cerulean blue eyes everything began so clear, I had been looking everywhere for peace except right in front of me. I leaned forward until my lips touched Xena’s. “I love you, I will never leave you. Understand?”

She nodded and looked at me with such a sadness in her eyes it took my breath away. “Rest, I’ll protect you tonight,” I gently laid her down on my bed roll covering her body with mine. “It will be okay Xena, I promise.” For the first time in the four years that I have known the dark woman she let me care for her. As she slept in my arms I kept running the past day through my head. I sighed kissing her cheek “I’ll never leave you Xena, even in death.”



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