Violence. Only a teeny bit, this is a romance.
Angst. LOTS AND LOTS OF IT, SO BE AWARE!I think there's a lot of crying in the story, mainly because I was crying a LOT when I wrote it, so… beware!
Love/Sex. Yes, between two women, and a man and a woman.
Age. If you're underage, and it is illegal where you are to read this type of story, then close this page. J, Thank you.
Title: This novel is not formerly titled, but Billie and Jewl is the identification name I'll be using.
Billie and Jewl (UNTITLED)
Katia N. Ruiz
"Marry me." Billie said to Johanna out of nowhere. She'd been
watching Johanna move about her kitchen, cooking dinner for them.
She sat cross-legged on one of the chairs at the table, her elbows pressed
against her knees. Billie wore shorts and a T-shirt, comfortable
after their lovemaking. The young travel agent loved the way Johanna
looked in her boxer shorts and T-shirt, the way her soft breasts shifted
as she moved about, leaning over this and that pot.
It had been a little over three months since they first made love and spent time together every day, one sleeping at the other's house and vice versa. Johanna had proven to be a loving lover, honest and full of laughter. She made Billie laugh and smile all the time, and she was always happy and smiling.
Johanna spun around, tears filling her eyes, shock all over her features. She held the spatula in her hand, lifted, looking as if she'd threaten Billie with it, but in her shock she didn't realize it. "What?" She exclaimed, not wanting to believe that she just heard the words she'd dreamed of for so long coming out of Billie's mouth.
Billie moved from the stool and went to Johanna. She wrapped strong arms around the slender waist and pulled her into a kiss, feeling her respond. "I want us to be together," She whispered, pulling back and meeting her eyes. "Let's have a commitment ceremony, let's take vows to our love." She kissed her again, deeper, and then pulled back slightly, her lips still touching Johanna's. "I love you," She mumbled against the smooth lips trembling against her own. "I want you to marry me."
The surge of happiness that went through Johanna made her drop her spatula and she wrapped her arms tightly around Billie, her eyes filling with tears. This time around, their kiss was even more passionate and long. When they came up for air, Johanna whispered tearfully: "Yes, Billie! I'll marry you; I'll marry you! I love you so much!" Tears left her eyes thickly and she sobbed softly.
Billie hugged her, feeling tears fill her eyes also, happy beyond words. She reached over and turned off the stove, pulling Johanna down to the kitchen floor, where they proceeded to make slow, passionate love.
"We're getting married." Billie told Margo the next day. She
was behind her desk booking flight reservations for a school trip to Greece
through the computer. The words stumbled out of her mouth without
In shock, Margo stared at her for a long frozen moment before leaping to her feet, screaming ecstatically. She ran around her desk and over to Billie, pulling her up from her chair and hugging her, jumping up and down happily. Billie was laughing, hugging her back. She saw an older woman passing by the window on the sidewalk, looking in and accelerating her pace as she "realized" what she was seeing.
Margo, in the mean time, was going crazy with happiness. "Oh my God, Billie! I'm so happy!" She exclaimed; her voice choked with tears. She wiped at them, but they kept coming.
Billie pulled back and stared at her. Margo's mascara was running with her tears and her blush was streaking; she was an adorable sight. "Why are you crying, then?" Billie asked softly, her own eyes tearful.
Margo pulled her back into their embrace. "You're finally happy, Billie." Margo whispered shakily. "You're finally moving on!" She pulled back, moving to her desk. "I have to call Johanna!"
Margo talked Johanna into letting her help plan the ceremony and the party,
while Billie dealt with the invitations. Almost everyone in town,
the gays, and even the straight population that wasn't homophobic, was
invited. Billie even sent an invitation to her mother, more
out of spite than actually wanting her to be there.
When the news spread around town, there were many different reactions. There was a lot of opposition, but there were even more welcome receptions. Mike Rosenbloom organized a special dinner at his restaurant to congratulate them, drawing a lot of friends. Johanna offered him the job of catering, and he accepted, going as far as to offer his restaurant for the reception. Johanna readily accepted; she and Margo had been trying to find a place to have the reception in.
Billie ran into her mother a few days after the dinner in the supermarket,
she was with Johanna, which made things even worse for Susan. They
were in the cereal isle, trying to figure out what to buy, when Susan Jordan
approached them, a dangerous gleam in her eyes. Billie looked up
at the sound of the familiar clicking of high heels moving towards them.
At the sight of her mother, Billie realized she'd missed her this past year and a half. Their relationship, even though it had been dishonest to Billie because she had to hide her sexuality, had still been full of loving. Billie had missed her eyes, gray and warm; her Oscar De La Renta perfume and everything else about her. Her mother was a beautiful woman, and her demeanor towards Billie had been peculiarly selfish in its love; until her only daughter had told her she was gay. After that, Susan had turned into Attila the Hun.
Presently, Susan made her way to her daughter; her cheeks were flushed and silvery eyes stormed in her anger. "You have a lot of nerve!" She hissed at them.
Johanna looked up from the rows of cereal; she hadn't noticed Susan's approach until she'd spoken. She looked askance at Billie. "Billie?" She said uncertainly. She had inkling as to who this woman was, the shape of her eyes were reflected on Billie's face.
Billie stared at her mother, blinking back tears. All this time her mother hadn't spoken to her, and now that she did, it wasn't in a loving way. She reached for Johanna's hand and pulled her forward. "Johanna," She said huskily, swallowing hard. "This is my mother, Susan Jordan. Mother, meet Johanna Mason-Lee."
Johanna smiled tentatively, offering her hand to shake. "A pleasure, Mrs. Jordan." She said.
Susan looked at her hand disgustedly, and then her eyes, so like Billie's, met her daughter's. "No daughter of mine would do this to me!" She said. "I'm glad I disowned you."
"Nothing can change the fact that I'm your daughter, mother, nothing!" Billie replied; the pain in her voice made Johanna squeeze her hand in comfort. "I'm glad you disowned me, it's a shame that my mother doesn't love me enough to accept me the way I am." She turned away from her, shoving the box of cereal in their cart and pushing it away from her mother and Johanna.
"You really shouldn't do that to your daughter, you can miss her greatest years with that attitude." Johanna said softly, her eyes pleading.
Susan's eyes narrowed and she spun away from Johanna without a word.
Johanna caught up with Billie in the frozen food section. Billie stood staring into the freezer, staring absently at the stacks of frozen meals. She touched her tense shoulder gently. "Billie." She whispered. Billie turned to look at her, her eyes filling with tears. "Oh, Billie…" Johanna whispered brokenly, her heart aching for her. She cupped the back of Billie's neck and tenderly pulled her into an embrace.
Billie went into her arms willingly, her arms around her waist, her face pressed into the crook of her shoulder and slender neck. They held each other for a long time; when Johanna felt Billie pulling back, she pulled back also. "Are you alright?" She asked gently.
Billie nodded, taking deep breaths. "I'm fine, love. I'm just sorry these were the circumstances in which you met my mother." She said softly.
Johanna brushed a tear from Billie's cheek, her expression as their eyes met full of love. "I don't mind." She said, smiling reassuringly. They gazed at each other for a few moments.
Recovered, Billie returned the smile and turned to walk away, wrapping an arm around Johanna and pushing the cart with the other. "I'm not going to let my mother stop me from doing this." She said, pulling Johanna close and kissing her temple tenderly.
"I know, baby." Johanna said. She was determined to try to get her to talk to her about what just happened.
It was dark as Billie made her way home from the agency. She had
been held back by a problem with some of the reservations, which she'd
fixed as quickly as she could. She walked the same way she always
walked, past the stores and homes of her neighbors. As she strolled
down Earl Avenue, she'd run into Bobby Downey and had ignored his stare
as she walked by him. Hands in her pockets, she noticed that he was
following her. She turned her face slightly and saw that he was carrying
something in his hand. She spun around and faced him, her eyes quickly
taking in the bat in his right hand. "What do you want with me?"
She said harshly.
Bobby hesitated, but continued to glare at her. "You're not going to get the best of me again, Billie." He snarled, moving the bat in a circular motion. "This time you're the one that's going to get a broken bone." Suddenly, he lunged at her, swinging.
Billie had no time to move away, and she fell backwards with his full weight on top of her, smacking the back of her head against the ground. She groaned in pain, and punched at him. In the scuffle that ensued, Bobby would have ended up in pretty bad shape had the cops not arrived in time to put a stop to it. As it was, Billie had broken his arm when she wrestled the bat away from him and swung it with all she was worth.
Johanna sat cross-legged on Billie's couch, reading through some of her
papers from work. She looked up from her papers as Billie stormed
into the house past her and stumbled down the hall into the bathroom.
Her shoulders were tense, and the anger with which she slammed the bathroom
door made Johanna worry. She climbed up from the couch, and went
to the bathroom, knocking on the door. "Billie?" She called.
Billie didn't answer, but Johanna could hear the sink water running.
"Billie, open the door. What's going on?"
Billie opened the door and Johanna gasped, bringing her hand up to her lips. Billie's lower lip was bleeding and she had a very dark bruise below her right eye. Her hair and clothes were tousled and bloody; her eyes were angry and full of pain. She wouldn't meet Johanna's eyes, turning away and continuing to wash her lip again.
Johanna stepped forward and touched Billie's back with a shaky hand. "Tell me what happened." She whispered; she caught sight of a bleeding cut at the back of Billie's head and gasped.
Billie straightened, and Johanna moved up close to her from behind, wrapping her arms around her waist. "They think they're going to change my mind," Billie said huskily, and their eyes met through their reflection. "I'm not going to change."
Johanna was angry. "Who was it?" She asked, her arms tightening around her.
"Bobby Downey, he doesn't agree that we should get committed." Billie said bitterly, her jaw clenching. "But I showed him not to get in my way when I want something. He came off worst."
Johanna sighed, and pressed her face against Billie's back. "I love you so much, Billie." She whispered, and urged Billie to turn around. "I'm so sorry this is happening." She gazed lovingly at her. "Now look at you, you're going to have a big bruise on our wedding day!"
Billie smiled softly, and cupped Johanna's face gently, kissing her lips gingerly, careful of her cut. "No little pitiful bruise is going to stop our happiness, alright?" She whispered softly, running her hands through Johanna's silky hair.
Johanna sighed, and stroked Billie's cheek right below the bruise. "I know, baby." She said. "Now let's clean you up, ok? You have a cut on the back of your head, it's not bleeding badly, but I want to clean it."
With a small smile, Billie pulled back and sat on the toilet and waited for Johanna to clean her up.
Johanna managed to get Mayor Stetson to let them use Drake Gardens for
the ceremony. She promised that she would have cleaning crews there
as soon as the party was over at Rosenbloom's. Many people protested
the use of the park, which was located across the street from the church.
Most of the protesters were Church members, and Billie's mother joined
them in a march in front of Mayor's office. But Larry Stetson was
a liberal and he did the complete opposite of what they wanted. "It
is, after all," He announced proudly to Johanna. "Our first lesbian
wedding in Illuminations."
The protesters were livid, and threatened to ruin the whole thing. Mayor Stetson threatened to have them all arrested and fined if he had to. Nothing more was heard, though they could be seen marching across the street from the park in front of the church.
Margo asked the couple if they would take a honeymoon trip; she wanted to pick something perfect for them. Something like Providence Town or Cape Cod. But Johanna and Billie wanted to stay close to town, just take a few days off and hibernate together. Margo insisted, but they declined with gratitude.
Wedding planning exhausted Billie, while Johanna seemed to glow more every passing day. She loved planning their wedding almost as much as their lovemaking. There were nights when they went to bed too exhausted to make love, and they just held each other and talked.
Two nights before the day of their ceremony and reception, after making
slow passionate love for the last time before becoming official Partners,
they lay in bed together. They talked in hushed voices, their sentences
punctuated by yawns. "One more day and we'll be married." Billie
Johanna gazed at her with sweet eyes. "You know I won't spend tomorrow night with you." She whispered, stroking Billie's stomach slowly.
Billie pouted playfully. "Yes." She said.
"I have to get ready for you," Johanna said, her soft hand gliding up to cup a breast.
Billie took a sharp breath, turning on her side and reaching a hand between Johanna's legs and into her moistness. "Ready?" She asked huskily. "How ready?"
Johanna lifted a leg to allow access to the hand stroking her back to life. She moaned, and moved closer, feeling Billie's slender fingers enter her. "I-" She gasped, pulling Billie to her, feeling her silky mouth on her neck. "I have to get… beautiful for you."
Billie thrust her fingers deeply into her, knowing what kind of ready Johanna was right now. She felt Johanna arch against her with a shudder. "You're always beautiful, baby." She whispered, loosing herself to the responsiveness of Johanna's body.
Joseph sat beside Jewl on her couch, taking the small hand that rested
on her lap into his. Jewl stared out the window, her eyes full of
pain. He gazed at her with green eyes, the sweetest expression of
love on his handsome face. He loved her so much and he didn't know
how to tell her; he was in love with her and she didn't even realize it.
Today, he looked especially handsome, wearing a tuxedo for the ceremony. His reddish straight hair was brushed to the side, giving the impression that he was younger than his twenty five years. He could see she was upset about something, and could not get it out of her. She had been different the past year and a half, since Billie had come out to everyone, and seemed to be going downhill for the past month.
"Aren't you coming, Jewl?" He asked softly, shifting even closer to her.
Jewl didn't look at him, shaking her head no. "I'm not going." She said; her voice sounded choked.
"Why?" Joseph asked gently.
"I don't agree with it." She said softly, lying, but meeting his eyes.
Joseph frowned. "She's like our sister, Jewl." When Jewl didn't respond, Joseph looked into her eyes more closely. The expression of pain he saw there tore him inside. "Tell me the truth, Jewl." He pleaded suddenly, surprising her. "What is it? Are you in love with Billie, is that it?" He reached up with his free hand and touched her face gently.
Jewl moved her face away from his hand, her eyes tearing. "No!" She lied again, swallowing the tears.
"Jewl, you don't have to lie to me." He said gently, squeezing her hand.
"I'm not in love with Billie." Jewl insisted.
He knew she was lying, but he didn't insist. It was too late for her now.
Billie could not take her eyes away from Johanna. She was beautiful,
and many a breath caught as she slowly made her way up to Billie, the resplendent
Joseph at her arm. He escorted her as the best man. Her wavy
black hair was curled and fell in a loose cascade over her shoulders and
back. She wore a white gown that hugged her beautiful breasts and
loosened around her waist. Her creamy skin flushed slightly with
happiness and excitement. She couldn't believe that the woman she
loved most stood ahead of her, waiting.
Looking gorgeous, even with the bruise below her eye, Billie stood by the female reverend Johanna had found thanks to Mike. She looked strapping in a black suit, a high-collared button-down shirt fitted snugly around her neck by a black bow tie. Her short hair seemed windblown and fell against her forehead. Johanna couldn't take her eyes away from her as she moved closer. She was overwhelmed by love.
But more overwhelming was the presence of at least half of Illuminations. The park was packed.
Johanna finally reached Billie's side and handed Johanna over with a big grin. He kissed both of them and hugged them. He winked at them as he moved to his mother's side. They smiled at him and held hands as they turned to face the reverend. Mike Rosenbloom had given her name to Johanna the night of their dinner when she'd mentioned that she couldn't find a reverend to marry them. The goodness in her eyes was evident as she gazed at both young women with sweet brown eyes. She married them with no obstacles on that beautiful sunny day. She smiled brightly as she declared in a strong voice: "I now pronounce you partners in your union. You may kiss."
Billie turned to Johanna, moving closer, smiling softly. Wrapping her arms slowly around her slender waist, she pulled the shorter woman against her body. Johanna grinned up at Billie and wrapped her arms around her neck. Their kiss was long and passionate. The people around them clapped and cheered enthusiastically.
Jewl watched from afar, tears forming in her eyes as Billie took Johanna
into her arms and kissed her. She had seen the way Billie's eyes
shone with love as she gazed at Johanna. Jewl realized that Billie
had moved on, that it was too late now for Jewl to come out for her.
The depression that settled over her almost two years ago seemed to take
on an even heavier dimension; life didn't seem worth living. She
forced her eyes away from the two women clasping each other far away.
She turned away from them, her shoulders sagging, and she walked off slowly.
Joseph caught sight of her as she walked away, and he could see the sagging of her shoulders, the sadness in the slowness of her walk. He urged to run after her, but he held off, deciding to go after her after everyone made their way towards Rosenbloom's. As everyone began walking down the square towards Rosenbloom's, he began to make his way in the opposite direction, the way he'd seen Jewl go.
Lorna watched her son walking in the opposite direction, and intercepted him. She saw his worried blue eyes look absently towards her, not really recognizing, before he began to walk around her. "Joseph!" Lorna said, grabbing his muscled arm. He looked at her, finally recognizing her. "Where are you going, son?"
"To Jewl." He said apologetically. "I'll be back, I promise. I just need to see if she's okay. She didn't seem so well when I left her this morning."
Lorna eyed her son carefully. She knew about his feelings for Jewl, and knew also that Jewl had not been herself for a while now. "Go ahead, love." She said, patting his arm comfortingly; she was worried about Jewl now. "I'll give your excuses."
"Thanks, mom." Joseph said, leaning over and kissing her cheek. He left in a hurry.
Billie held Johanna as they danced slowly Céline Dion's Falling
into You. The first dance had come and gone, and now other couples
joined them in the small dance floor. Their foreheads touched as
they gazed at each other's lips. Johanna's arms rested loosely over
Billie's strong shoulders, Billie's were wrapped tightly around her waist,
pressing their hips together. Johanna's fingers slid to the back
of Billie's head, brushing through silky hair and pulling her lips down
for a long passionate kiss as one of Johanna's favorite songs cut in.
KD Lang crooned The Air That I Breathe for them, and Johanna looked into
Billie's eyes and silently let her know that this song was for her.
Arousal was quick to come, and Billie felt their bodies grow hot as they
clasped each other tightly and Johanna moaned softly as Billie kissed her
They broke their kiss and embraced tightly. "I love you so much!" Johanna whispered thickly.
Billie groaned, and kissed Johanna's silky neck passionately. "And I love you." She whispered; her voice was full of feeling. The other people continued to dance around them, but their minds were on nothing but one another. For Billie, there was nothing but Johanna.
Johanna pulled back and kissed Billie's forehead with tender lips. She looked up into the eyes that she loved so much. "I've got a little present for you." She whispered suggestively.
Billie looked curious and loving at the same time. "What did you get me?" She asked. She looked up and smiled at a grinning Margo as she passed by in the armarms of a woman Billie had never seen before.
Johanna pursed her lips teasingly and shook her head, her eyes coy. “It was something Margo helped me pick out. You’ll see it tonight.” She whispered sensuously, pulling Billie’s head down for another kiss. Everything and everyone around them faded once more into the background until there was only the feel of their bodies and the music.
Continued in part IV
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