Disclaimer: They ain't mine. They are RENPIC's I guess though I don't really know.

I won't make any dollars, dinars, drachmas, lira, (or insert your monetary unit) on this story.

PG. They are talking and that is about all. Although there may be a hint in the direction of something a bit more than friendship concerning Xena and Ares, Gabrielle and Argo....

Enjoy and let me know what you think. Thanks.


Bittersweet Banter

By Kwipinky

Xena: (Singing) I never dreamed that we'd be distanced by a hate,

Xena: (Singing) That all the trust we had would goó

Gabrielle: (Singing) How could I hate you

Xena: (Singing) How could it come to past this awful twist of fate

Gabrielle: (Singing) How could I hurt you

Xena: (Singing) This madness can't be so

Gabrielle: (Singing) I can't believe it

Xena: (Singing) I never dreamed that any barriers could rise

Gabrielle: (Singing) Or that Iëd ever see the stranger in your eyes

(They stop singing and look at each other.)

Gabrielle: We'll I can imagine seeing the stranger in your eyes. I mean my kid allegedly

killed your kid.

Xena: (Angrily) Alleged, Gab..bri..elle...

Gabrielle: She got the death penalty Xena.

Xena: (Smiling) Oh yeah.

Gabrielle: Xena that smile is inappropriate.

Xena: (Not realizing she smiled) I smiled?

Gabrielle: Yes, dammit.

Xena: You do not have to swear.

Gabrielle: Xena, I hate it when we have these chats.

Xena: What were we disgusting.

Gabrielle: You know, dammit.

Xena: Gabrielle you do not...

Gabrielle: I know, dammit.

Xena: (Getting angry again, pointing her finger and touching Gabrielle's nose) I've had it with you!

Gabrielle: (Getting in fighting stance) Oh yeah, what are ya gonna do Warrior Princess?

Xena: (Starts circling Gabrielle) Wouldn't ya like to know Amazon Princess!

Gabrielle: Warrior!

Xena: Amazon!

Gabrielle: (Stopping, scratching her head.) This Amazon thing, I'm a princess, I'm a queen, I'm a princess, I'm a queen, what am I Xena? Really.

Xena: You are: Gabrielle of Poteidaia, bard, Amazon Princess...

Gabrielle: (Visions of the Dirty Half Dozen flash back.) Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Xena: What?

Gabrielle: I've heard that speech before.

Xena: Gabrielle, I am not a bard. My story-telling, ego-raising skills are limited. So I recycle my wisdom. You know why? I have many...

Gabrielle: I know, I know, you have... knowledge about lots of things?

Xena: Yeah, kind of like that. But not exactly....

Gabrielle: (Cutting Xena off.) Let me! Let me! You have many... ideals!

Xena: Well, no.

Gabrielle: Let me try one more time.

Xena: Okay, just once though.

Gabrielle: You have many... stills! Photos. You know, from that Warrior Princess show. (Gabrielle gets lost deep in thought, and then shakes her head.) I can never remember the first name of that program.

Xena: (Getting in her fighting stance.) Um, forget it for now. Get your staff ready.

Gabrielle: (looking around wildly.) Make-up, body-double, stunt-double, Renee's personal assistant get over here!

Xena: (Pulling the people away from Gabrielle's earshot.) I thought you guys told me you would keep her informed! (Xena shakes her finger at each of them.) One more mistake and I'll...

Gabrielle: Xena, hey Xena, I can't hear what you're saying.

Xena: (Motioning the people to leave.) You didn't miss anything.

Gabrielle: I'm hungry.

Xena: That boar didn't fill you up?

Gabrielle: (Pouting) Xena, that was twenty minutes ago.

Xena: Okay, okay. (Xena goes hunting; she comes back a day later. Her clothes are disheveled and she has grass in her hair. She looks down and sees Ares sword in her cleavage and pulls it out. She hides it behind her back and flicks it into the woods nearby.)

Xena: Gabrielle? Gabrielle! (Frantically Xena looks for her friend.)

Gabrielle: (Throwing her blanket off she gets up from her bedroll. She looks extremely pregnant.) I'll shine, but.... Hey! Someone made me rise!

Xena: Gabrielle! What happened?!

Gabrielle: Xena! You were gone so long and I was hungry and I searched for you and I got more hungry and I yelled out your name and I was starving and I looked for you and I lost weight for lack of food and I cried for you and I got terribly hungrier and I screamed til my throat was sore and Argo whinnied and I ate her and I begged for you to come back and I....

Xena: Wait a minute! You... you... Gabrielle you... I can't believe this! You...

cried for me?

(Both look at each other and nod their heads in unison.)

Gabrielle: (At the same time with Xena says) I'm sorry I ate your horse.

İXena:(At the same time with Gabrielle says) I'm sorry you lost your voice.

(They hug.)

Xena: (Smiles and starts singing) I never dreamed we'd be distanced by a hate...

Gabrielle: (Looking at Xena) When are we gonna get that ditty out of your head? Youİİİİİİİİİİİİİİİİİ

always start singing it and I join in and we get mad for a minute and then weİİİİİİ

hug.... Hmm. It's the hugging isn't.

Xena: (Smiles, winks, and starts singing again.) That all the trust we had would go....


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