Summary: This is the last installment of the series, sequel to I Will Be and Turning Tables. Xena has left Gabrielle once more and returned to Amphipolis where she receives a letter with heartbreaking news. Will she finally be able to fix things with Gabrielle or is she much too late?
Disclaimer: Xena, Gabrielle, Eve, Cyrene and all the other characters from Xena, The Warrior Priness don't belong to me. I'm just borrowing them for this story. I will return them once it has been finished, sadly.
Violence: The violence in this story will be very mild, if any at all. There are many curse words though.
Subtext: Subtext is maintext in this fanfiction. There will be graphic scenes of two women making love, and having sex. Along with a lot of heartbreak. If this bothers you, then you might want to stop reading this now, or you can open your mind and continue.
If you are under the age of eighteen, or this type of story is illegal where you live, then close stop reading now. Close the page.
Author's Note: This is the final installment of the series I have been writing, beginning with I Will Be then Turning Tables. These have been the most popular stories I have written so far and I've loved writing them. I am writing a conqueror story at the same time as this one so I don't know how quickly the chapters are going to be installed, but no more than a week after each.
Comments are very much appreciated.
If you wish to send them to me, my email is jacklavigne13@hotmail .com
Enjoy the show! Or so to speak.
It Should Be Me
By jacklavigne
I don't know what I've done, Or if I like what I've begun
But something told me to run, And honey, you know me, it's all or none
There were sounds in my head, Little voices whispering
That I should go and this should end
Oh, and I found myself listening
And I don't know who I am, who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know If could stand another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
Cause she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood
Missy Higgins - Where I Stood
Prologue
I made a horrible mistake and I regret it. In the space of two and a half years, I lost the two women in my life that meant the world to me. All because of one giant mistake, a moment of weakness. I gave my affections to a man instead of my lover, betraying our relationship and her. But it didn't stop there, oh no. I continued to make mistakes long after which has led me to where I am now, sitting on my front porch with a scroll being crushed to dust in my trembling hands.
The second big mistake I made after cheating on my soulmate, was letting her leave me. Not once but twice. She left me on our way home from Egypt when she couldn't stand to look at me anymore. I deserved it, I know this. I had been unfaithful to her and broken her heart, something I swore I would never do but did on more occasions that I'd care to admit. She left me to be with her people and rule the Amazon nation. To my surprise, a few moons after, she returned to me though only for a night. The ache in my heart left me as she made love to me that night, but it returned when she slipped from my room straight after. She couldn't forgive me nor could I forgive myself.
And then Alexandria came back into my life after I thought her dead. We had grown up together and she fought by my side in my army when I was a warlord. She left me after a few years, causing the darkness inside of my to rise even higher. It was completely by chance that she stopped over in Amphipolis in her travels and we met each other again. We had both changed for the better and I thought we could be together but alas that was not to be either. My third mistake was cheating on her with Gabrielle and breaking her heart. I knew then and I know now that she expected it, maybe even planned for it to happen but that doesnt change the facts. She left the village and me the next night, her heart broken beyond repair though she tried to hide it from me. I haven't seen or heard from her since.
My biggest regret is what happened after that. Gabrielle came to me as I knew she would and as we laid in my bed in her village, I felt complete. Everything came together as I held her in my arms, her heart beating in sync with mine. But I was a fool. I was scared, terrfied beyond belief of many things. I was afraid that she would end up hurting me or worse, that I would end up hurting her again. I had cheated on her and then cheated to be with her even after I promised myself that I would change. What if I couldn't change? Once a cheater, always a cheater they say. I made a desicion then, the wrong one I know now.
I left her that night as she slept with an adorable smile on her face. I packed my things and took my daughter with me back to Amphipolis. I had foolishly hoped that maybe if we spent some time apart, we could work out some things on our own before we came back together. Apparently, I took too long.
I read the scroll that I held in my hands once more as a tear leaked from the corner of my eye. I should have known this would happen, should have seen it coming, but I didn't. It was an invitation from the Queen of the Amazons, written in the perfect handwriting that I knew so well.
Dearest friends and family,
I am pleased to tell you that I am to be married on the night of Summer Solstice.
My consort, Miranda and I would like to invite you to attend our joining ceremony in the Amazon village.
I hope to see you all there.
Queen Gabrielle
I bit my lip until I tasted blood as I slowly started to rip the parchment into tiny pieces, letting it drift from my fingers and onto the ground. Part of me wanted to go but I knew that I couldn't. It would destroy me beyond repair to see her marry another. I know she only sent me an invite in hopes that I would bring our daughter to her wedding. I would send Eve with my mother who was also invited and I will stay home and drink until I can't remember why I feel so broken inside. My heart was broken. Gabrielle is getting married to someone else.
It should be me but I made a mistake. I've made so many mistakes.
To be continued in Chapter One.