Disclaimers: See Chapter 1. Any other comments can be sent to me at bironel@gmail.com
Synopsis: A novella about the an insanely wealthy white woman's search for her soul mate and the debt ridden black woman writer, with a vivid imagination, who tries to keep out of her way.
The Failure of Fathers
Our Father, which art in...
St. Francis Hospital … for hypertension,
Our Father, which art in...
Jumpsuits and prisons… Federal detention,
Our Father, which art in...
Dark bars and alleys… lethal injections,
Our Father, which art in...
denial, delusion... this can't not happen again.
Hallowed be thy... state your name for the record.
Hallowed be thy... state your name for the record .
-Saul Williams, Amethyst Rock Star
Celebrating the success of the first phase of her plan for re-gifting, Nailah stuck her spoon into the bowl the sugary goodness that is Raisin Bran in Hazelnut milk while watching her favorite Powerpuff Girl cartoons when a news bulletin interrupted the programming.
Field Reporter Leigh: This is Dean Leigh reporting, Metro police has charged Mrs. Ena I. Moon, aged 52 for kidnapping of a child Jessica Brown De Klerk-Zwart who was in her care as a Nanny this past Wednesday afternoon.
Video of police and the press outside Amanda's building was showing along with a slide show of past photos of Amanda.
Field Reporter Leigh: Police said Mrs. Moon, left Ms. Amanda De Klerk-Zwart's residence, where she was employed as a nanny, with the young infant around 12:30 PM wearing a dark coat, pushing a bright turquoise pram and proceeded with the infant to the nearby park. Hours later, Police said a woman resembling Mrs. Moon, was able to pass through airport security with an infant boy on a flight to Paris , France . French authorities are investigating.
A video footage of a Metro police spokeswoman Lt. Captain Brianna Hold, the lead female investigator of the kidnapping of Baby Jessica.
Lt. Captain Hold: It's very early in our investigation. We're going to need to canvass the area for all leads.
Field Reporter Leigh: Police said they are looking any information because the Mrs. Moon may have had an accomplice.
When her Powerpuff cartoon programming returned in the disorienting middle of the show, Nailah's land line phone rang. She muted the volume on her new TV set and picked up the call on the third ring.
Seun: Nailah did you hear what happened on the news?
Nailah: Yeah I just did.
Seun: The police have been contacting various family members. The police want to talk to you.
Nailah: Why? I didn't do this?
Seun: I know you didn't but you won't be able to hide anymore. You're gonna have to speak with them. Come to the restaurant and we'll figure something out.
Nailah hung up the phone and sat down.
The phone rang again, this time it was George.
George: They're gonna find out what we did!
Nailah immediately hung up. She ignored the ringing phone as she got ready to go to her cousin's restaurant. She threw her pj's in the hamper, took a shower and got dressed by the time George was at her apartment front door, ringing her door bell.
Nailah opened the door and pulled George inside in her apartment quickly shutting the door so no one will notice them.
Nailah (whispers): My Auntie is sleeping in the guest bedroom. Why would you say that on MY phone! Didn't you hear what happened on the news?
George (whispers): I knew it! Were going to jail!
Nailah (whispers): Do you know how suspicious that call sounded? I got a call from Seun earlier and the police want to speak to me! What if they heard that call? How could you be so stupid!
George (whispers): They know! They know what we did!
Nailah (whispers): Did you kidnap a baby?
George (whispers): No of course not!
Nailah (whispers): If you keep acting like this, they will think we did. Worst case scenario they WILL find out what we actually did.
George (whispers): I'm telling them you forced me to help you with sex.
Nailah (whispers): You liar! What sex???
George (whispers): To avoid anally rape-age, I'll say anything.
Nailah: Newsflash your ass isn't that captivating!
Auntie wearing a floral housecoat and slippers, her hair in curlers, neatly wrapped with a matching kerchief, came out of the closet called a guest room and stood, annoyed, with her tight fists akimbo, facing both a surprised Nailah and nervous George.
Auntie: What is going on out here? I was trying to catch a nice nap! What is HE doing here?
Nailah: Nothing is going on Auntie. I was just discussing stuff with George. We're leaving so you can get your rest.
Auntie: Nailah, you ARE a married woman. You can't be dating other people AND be married. Otherwise why get married? You confuse people being both married and dating. What if someone who dates you want to marry you too? You can't collect spouses. Especially not a lot of rich ones. So get with the program!
Nailah: For the hundredth time I was tricked!
Auntie: Well you are married, now. As you young people like to say, deal with it! People are tricked into being married everyday what makes you think you're so special that you get to be forewarned? Your uncle tricked me by saying he was well off financially. I didn't know he didn't have a pot to piss in until AFTER the wedding. We all get tricked. I did what had to be done, I dealt with it and made that man GET well off. It took some time but we, together, built a good home. I forgave him his deceit AFTER we brought our house. God rest his soul! And you're not just married, you have a child! You're here moaning and groaning about being lied to and you haven't even seen about your child.
Nailah: THAT is not my child!
Auntie: You sound just like your father. He said the same thing and it broke you poor mother's heart.
Nailah: I am NOT like my father!
Auntie: Have you seen this child? Does she have enough to eat? Is she comfortable? Is she safe and protected? When I asked YOUR father those same questions, a month after YOU were born, he looked at me with a selfish stare, the same way you are looking at me now. I thought I raised you better than that Nailah.
Auntie shook her head and walked back into her room, closing the door behind her. Nailah turned an angry stare at George and he stepped away from her.
George (whispers): She doesn't know does she?
Nailah: Now I'm only going to say this once don't mess this up George! If you do, anal rapes will be mild compared to what I'll do! I'm not playing!
-----
Nailah left her apartment, watched George drive away then jumped on Tyrone and sped to the family restaurant. When she arrived she parked her motorcycle next to Cousin JB's car. She noted that she didn't see Seun nor Kyland's cars in the parking lot.
She entered the restaurant through the empty dark kitchen. It was early and none of the cooking staff was there yet to do prep work.
Nailah walked through to the main dining room which was illuminated by the emergency lights. She heard low conversation from the second floor of the restaurant where the private dining rooms were located along with the main management offices of the restaurant.
Nailah climbed the stairs and the voices were louder. The voices were coming from Kyland's office but it wasn't Kyland she heard. She heard her elder cousin JB arguing with her friend Jo!
Nailah crouched next to the slightly open office door, eavesdropping on their conversation:
Cousin JB: Joanne I want you to leave my business.
Jo: I would have never imagined that you would have done so well for yourself John Brian. Your resourcefulness surprises me.
Cousin JB: You tried to ruin my life with your lies all those years ago. They didn't work. So leave me alone.
Jo: John Brian is this any way to treat an old friend? After all I've done for you?
Cousin JB: You tried to have be locked up for a crime I didn't commit! If you don't leave in the next minute I'll be the one calling the police!
Jo: Don't get excited John Brian. You could die of a stroke or a heart attack. I take comfort that you still exist in the world. Now give me the box Jacob left with you for safe keeping.
Cousin JB: You think I kept that! I threw it in the Pacific Ocean !
Jo: You had no right to do that with MY property!
Cousin JB: I trusted Jacob about as much as I trusted you. For all I knew it was something else to set me up. You two got me expelled! I had dreams to be a civil engineer and you both stole that from me with your evil, sick games. So yes I threw it into the ocean, off Third Beach , over forty years ago. You want it, go take a swim! Now get the hell out of my restaurant!
Nailah hid in storage closet when Jo stormed out of her cousin Kyland's office. From her hiding place, she watched Jo run down the steps with ease and not with the difficulty she previously had, when she went out with Nailah.
Detective Nailah: Vindicated! I knew we shouldn't have trusted that old woman. Everyone knows that most old folks especially with as many aches and pains she pretended she had are cranky, mean, unfriendly people.
Nailah wanted to check on her cousin but the conversation made her intensely curious about her so-called friend Jo, so she followed her out the restaurant.
Nailah discreetly followed Jo down Robeson Street to the Blue Horizon hotel. Jo entered the hotel and walked into the restaurant. Nailah watched from the street as Jo stepped outside to-- smoke a cigarette! Nailah never recalled Jo smoking!
Detective Nailah: See she doesn't walk with a limp anymore! What else is she up to?
Hood Rat Nailah: What do we have, sucker written across our forehead?
Detective Nailah: I think this is bigger than just us. Wait she's answering her cell phone! We got to hear what that lying witch is saying! If she is trying to hurt Cousin JB… wait Cousin JB was the guy she loved a when she was young?!
Hood Rat Nailah: From Cousin JB's side of it he was someone she was trying to use years ago. Damn we must have a “use me/abuse me” gene in this family!
Nailah ducked behind a news kiosk near where Jo was smoking her cigarette, and over heard this partial conversation:
Jo: Where are you? Good. Keep out of sight and and don't let any thing happen to it. This time I've got her right where I want her and she's going to give me what is rightfully mine! That ungrateful bitch! If I had done it differently all those years ago I wouldn't have to resort to this-- living in poverty like a common animal! This nightmare will soon end and I will finally return to my true station in life and leave poor, confused Nailah to deal with the fallout. Pascal, I'll call you back.
-----
Amanda stared despondently out her living room window wondering where her daughter was and hoping that she was safe. She berated herself for being so stupid in hiring someone to take care of Jessica who would steal her away. Gerald's investigative team told her that the name “ENA I MOON” was an anagram for “I AM NO ONE”.
The phone rang.
Amanda: Hello?
Jo: Amanda.
Amanda: What do YOU want?
Jo: Is that anyway to speak to your mother? I was calling to lend my assistance in recovering this science project you call a daughter. I heard about this disgusting thing you did. Regardless, that child must be recovered as quickly as possible. After twenty-four hours, the likelihood of finding a kidnapped victim alive is highly unlikely.
Amanda: I'm hanging up now.
Jo: Amanda I can help you! Even though you have exiled me to the wilderness, I am not without contacts and resources that could prove beneficial to you. In fact, I am in Vancouver BC because I suspect that woman, you entered in an unholy farce you call a marriage, has taken your child. I've been keeping tabs on her.
Amanda: How long have you been tailing her? Before or after you decided to frame her for something you and I both know you did?
Jo: If you want to play it like that fine. You know the drill, the kid for the cash. I want all that you've stolen from me, all of it! De Klerk-Zwart Publishing was created by merging two families! I want my annual payments as the only heir to the Zwart fortune or I want my family named removed and my half given to me. You have three hours to decide which one of those options is your pleasure. I'll call you back to arrange the exchange.
Amanda heard the click and closed her tired eyes. She looked up and over to the police assigned to her loft who had just recorded the conversation between mother and estranged daughter.
The phone rang again.
Puzzled, Amanda answered.
Amanda: Hello?
Nailah: You got some nerve screwing about with my life and my bodily property like that! We're gonna have words real soon and your lawyer better expect a lawsuit or two!
Amanda: Nailah? Thank god it's you!
Nailah: I can put all that aside for now cause I think you got bigger troubles. I think this women that I met named Jo, she said her name is Josephine Zanier. Well I think she kidnapped your daughter or had her home attendant kidnapped her.
Amanda: How do you know that? Where are you?
Nailah: I just heard her talking to Pascal on her cell. That's her name. The home care attendant, I mean. She made another phone call but she moved too far away for me to hear who she was talking to. I followed her to her hotel after I overheard her arguing with my oldest cousin. You know… I think this woman PLANNED to bump into me both in the city and on the train ride up here.
Amanda: Where are you Nailah?
Nailah: Vancouver . In Canada . Oh shoot, she's on the move. We're on Robeson Street in the downtown area. I gotta follow her cause this old broad is up to something fishy. Just how many people have you pissed off in your life?
Amanda: She was probably the first one. Jo, is short for Joanne. She's my mother.
Nailah: Word? That explains a lot. Anyway I'll find out where she's going next. Maybe she can lead me to where your daughter is.
Amanda: Nailah?
Nailah: What?
Amanda: Be careful. If you find out anything more call the police there.
Nailah: Okay.
Nailah disconnected the call as Amanda looked up at the officers recording the conversation.
Amanda: Gerald! We need tickets to Vancouver BC and I need a camera! A digital camera!
-----
Riding her trusty Tyrone, she closely followed the coach bus Jo got on at Burrard Street as it turned into Route 99 cutting through downtown Vancouver and through the city of Richmond .
When the bus stopped at the ferry terminal Jo finally got off and Nailah parked her bike in the parking lot of the BC Ferry terminal in Tsawwassen.
Nailah rushed to the main building of the terminal and observed Jo buying tickets for Victoria , Swartz Bay , which is on the southern tip of Vancouver Island . Jo then bought a cup of coffee from a machine and sat to drink it while waiting. Nailah picked up a ferry schedule discarded on a bench, noting it was current. She checked the time on her cell phone, it was 12 PM. She kept on eye on Jo, who hadn't moved while keeping her distance so Jo wouldn't spot her.
Detective Nailah: If she sees us how should we play this?
Hood Rat Nailah: We'll act like she's been doing. Pretend everything is copacetic.
Detective Nailah: It probably would be better to stay out of sight. If she sees us she'll wonder why we are going to Victoria . Do we know anything about Victoria ?
Hood Rat Nailah: All we know is how to get back and forth to JB's and the four walls of the apartment. We need another set of eyes on this operation!
Detective Nailah: Who George? Please he might faint--
Hood Rat Nailah: --Or confess to every unsolved crime in existence to avoid “anal probage”!
Nailah smiled at her dark humor. She did think of another person who would be a great addition to this mission.
A real, non-imaginary mission.
Her skin tingled with nervousness and excitement. It felt like all those times Nailah daydreamed she had these amazing abilities to right wrongs and promote justice had come to fruition. Then she thought, Jo, or her evil minion Pascal might have a gun!
Concealed behind a marble column and out of Jo's vision range, Nailah frantically scrolled through the address book of her cell phone.
She eliminated everyone except, one person when she checked the time. It was an hour before the ferry to Swartz Bay docks and considering the time it took to get to the terminal, this was the only person close enough to make it in time-- so she dialed and prayed this was the right choice.
Angry Man (angrily): Who's this?
Nailah: It's me Nailah, from the group. I need your help.
Angry Man: I don't help women.
Nailah: I thought I was on probation with you?
Angry Man: You fell off when you asked me for help.
Nailah: It's not for me really… it's to help a kid. A kidnapped baby. At least I think so.
Angry Man: Is this a boy or a girl?
Nailah: Does it matter?
Angry Man: Baby girls grow up to be deceitful women.
Nailah: Technically I'm the kid's… em, nevermind. Can you help me or not?
Angry Man: I can do anything I want. The question you should ask is if I want to help you. Let me save you from asking it. The answer is no!
Nailah: Fine. Do you know anything about Vancouver Island ?
Angry Man: It's an island.
Nailah: Since I'm at the ferry terminal I kinda figured that out! I'm following someone who may had kidnapped this baby and we're waiting in Tsawwassen--
Angry Man (interrupts) Telling more about it isn't going to make me want to help you.
Nailah: You know what? I don't need your help! I'll do this on my own. But if I get killed, I'm gonna make it my duty to specifically and exclusively haunt your ass!
Nailah disconnects the call, fuming. She looks around to see if anyone noticed her relieved that on one especially Jo did. Then she jumps when her phone rings again. It's Angry Man.
Nailah: Hello?
Angry Man: I'll be there in thirty minutes. Wait outside the terminal. Did you ride that death trap of yours?
Nailah: My bike? Yeah why?
Angry Man: I'll bring my car.
Nailah: You're coming?
Angry Man: You hard of hearing?
Nailah: No! Thanks, man. I appreciate it.
Angry man: Whatever. Alone you're doomed to failure and I ain't having no female haunt me.
He hung up and Nailah smiled.
-----
On the flight to Vancouver BC , thirty minutes before the plane landed at Vancouver International Airport , Amanda looked over the many files Gerald's team uploaded to the FTP site Amanda logged onto. The files contained information about Nailah's family and recent friends.
Although there still were no pictures of Nailah, the file contained photos of Nailah's Auntie shopping on Granville Island 's market district, her eldest cousin John Brian, her cousins Seun and Kyland, Kyland's wife and children and a tall black guy named George, who worked on maintaining the computers at a small animation company, in the video game industry. Interestingly playing video games wasn't George's only guilty pleasure. What was George's vice piqued Amanda's attention as she focused on all of George's personal information.
-----
As good as his word, Angry Man arrived at the ferry terminal and parked his car, a black Volkswagon Rabbit on the ferry. Nailah paid the fare both of them and for his vehicle, lamenting that she had to leave her trusty Tyrone behind.
Since Jo never met Angry Man he could scowl directly at her and she would not be aware anyone was following her during the ninety minute trip to Swartz Bay , while Nailah stayed out of sight.
-----
Once the passengers disembarked from the ferry, Nailah and Angry Man sat in his VW Rabbit while they watched Jo waiting for a BC Transit bus number 81. Once the bus arrived, Jo and a crowd of people from the ferry got on it. Angry Man followed the bus while Nailah watched for Jo getting off at various stops along the meandering bus route. After a thirty minute ride of trailing the bus, Jo got off at the last stop-- the entrance to The Butchart Gardens.
Angry Man parked the car in a parking space.
Angry Man: She's going inside. This is a strange place to take a kidnapped baby.
Nailah: Maybe I was wrong. I expected that she was going to some kidnapper's hideout or something like that.
Angry Man: So you used this kidnapping idea to get me out here? For what reason? I've sworn off all women so you can forget trying to get close to me!
Nailah: I'm not into you! I swore she had to have something to do with the kidnapping of the baby. She's the crazy one's mother! You know, the one would screwed me over and this old broad lied to me too!
Angry Man: That's what women do, lie.
Nailah: That's what I thought too until they said I was somewhat involved in the… you know baby making process. I thought she brought or stole that kid. I got some revenge back though! You best believe I did!
Angry Man: You blew up that rich woman's house?
Nailah: I wasn't able to do that but I did get back at her frankenstein doctor. Let's see how she likes going without hair for a month. Better yet wait until it all grows back!
Angry Man: You got a mean streak in you. The Asian with the nice legs?
Nailah: Hey I thought you've worn off women?
Angry Man: Don't date ‘em, don't care for ‘em, can't stand ‘em! I'm not blind though.
Nailah: What am I doing here, in a car with a man who hates what I am, trying to save some kid I don't know, didn't plan for nor want? Why is this my business? This is between two crazy women. I should just let them sort it all out between themselves.
Angry Man: I have a kid.
Nailah: You stay married long enough to breed?
Angry Man: You wanna make something of it?
Nailah: Just making conversation.
Angry Man: You got something to say, say it and have some balls to back it what you say.
Nailah: Trouble is, I don't have any balls, my friend. So are you close to your kid?
Angry Man: What do you think?
Nailah: It's a girl isn't it? She's why you ex-wife is trying to put you financially six feet under? Huh?
Angry Man: She don't need me. I can't teach a girl how to be a women. She's got her mother to show her how to be deceitful.
Nailah: If women aren't honorable and men are, how will little girls learn how to be honorable when their fathers don't teach ‘em?
Angry Man: Not my call is it? It's the judge's call. Besides I have to deal with your weirdness so I don't have time for a daughter.
Nailah: I never thought about my father, until this past week. He never popped up on my mental radar. He wasn't around so I didn't think about him. I know some kids grow up wondering who their dad is and what he looks like when their dad leaves them behind but I never did. Then bam! I've got a kid and I'm wondering… what are fathers for? I mean what do they do exactly?
Angry Man: I don't know. I mean, my dad, he was there. Paid the bills, kept a roof over our heads and food in our bellies. But who that man was, what he thought? I couldn't tell you. I never heard that man speak one word to me or my brothers throughout our childhood up until he died. Not one word. He'd hit us to keep us in line. None of that abusive shit, folks talk about. Just a good, hardass smack to make us stop whatever we were doing, with enough sting in it, to keep us from doing it again. My mother, on the other hand, couldn't keep her mouth shut.
Nailah: So why am I here? This kidnapping thing is a father situation and I'm woman enough to admit my physical limitations.
Angry Man: So you're out?
Nailah: Naw, I'm Arjuna. I mean I know what to do, I just don't know... Save this kid from one crazy woman so I can give her to another crazy one? That don't make any kind of sense to me. How about you Krishna ?
Nailah and Angry Man see Jo walking out of Butchart Gardens with another woman, who is pushing a gray stroller with a baby in it.
Angry Man: Who the hell is this Krishna person?
Nailah: The deity who drove Arjuna's chariot during a great war and you drove me here to this confrontation didn't you? That's gotta be Pascal. So they did take her! Man that crazy broad could run circles around her crazier daughter.
Angry Man: So what's the plan Action Jackson or Ashcan or whatever the hell you called yourself? Is this a baby saving operation or where's the nearest bar operation? ‘Cause I gotta admit, I'm getting thirsty.
Nailah sits quietly, pondering. Jo, Pascal and the baby wait at the bus stop for the next bus.
Angry Man: You already paid money out to get here, committed yourself to be here, you might as well see this through to the end. Passivity was the potential move BEFORE we got on the ferry.
Nailah: The name is Arjuna and I think I just figured out what fathers do. Why they're important. Mothers give you a sense of who you are on the inside. When you experience excellent mothering you understand boundaries, yours and other people. This crazy old woman's daughter's got no respect for other people-- she just plows into folks consequences be damned. Bad mom, broken kid needing therapy. Now excellent fathering that involves how you engage the world and your place in it. Boys without father suffer but girls do too. Fathers show you how to act in the world, your place in the world, moving gracefully in the space of the world. Guess that's why the world wobbles off balance so much. That's the failure of fathers. I've decided I'm gonna save my kid and you need to fight for yours. Raise her right and she may be the one woman walking on the planet that isn't deceitful because you helped her value honor.
Nailah jumped out the VW.
Hood Rat Nailah: Let's get to scrapping!
Detective Nailah: I have a better idea. If that fails, then we'll let loose the hounds!
-----
Nailah approached Jo and Pascal.
Nailah: My goodness! Fancy meeting you two here. Hi Jo! Pascal! I didn't know you were a mother? Is that a boy or a girl?
Pascal pulls the stroller closer to her.
Jo (shocked): Nailah! What are you doing here?
Nailah: Taking in the sights. The gardens are beautiful aren't they? I needed to get away from the city and all that stress. Needed a place to think quietly. My cousins told be about the cruise like ferry and these gardens. The price was right, so I jumped on it. Are you two waiting for the bus? So how did it go with your former love? Was he surprised to see you?
Jo (recovering quickly): The gardens are beautiful, aren't they. He was surprised to see me. It was an interesting visit. It's nice seeing you again but we have to get going. Pascal has to feed and put her baby to bed.
Nailah: I understand being so protective of her Pascal, it is a she right? Anyway, it's terrible was going on today! Did you hear that someone kidnapped the baby of that woman who stole my novel? I knew karma was gonna bite her on the ass but I didn't think it would happen so soon.
Jo: No we didn't hear about that.
Nailah glanced in the stroller and Pascal quickly covered the baby face so Nailah would not get a good look.
Nailah: It's all over the news! I saw more reports about it on the ferry ride over here. That's so strange you didn't hear about it… very strange considering that baby in THAT stroller is probably the baby that was kidnapped.
Jo: Nailah, you're so imaginative. Plotting a new novel?
Nailah: I've heard of dysfunctional families but why would you kidnap your own daughter's kid?
Jo: What do you know about it? Just keep out of my business and I'll keep out of yours.
Nailah: Keep me out like you were gonna frame me for this little caper of yours? Don't deny it. I heard you speaking to your sourpuss minion over there.
Pascal: I knew she would only cause trouble.
Jo (aghast): Nailah you're mistaken! I wasn't trying to hurt you in any way. I'm doing this for you as well as me. She has to be made to pay! I knew you were too kind hearted to make her pay you for what she's done to you. I am ashamed that evil thing is my daughter. And now she's done this! Created this unholy creature. She's hurt me too. Stripped my of all my possessions but now she's involving innocent people and I have to stop her! I could have stopped her years ago but I didn't! It was a mother's folly but I won't fail this time!
Nailah: Stopping her chaos involves therapy and/or medication, NOT stealing her kid!
Jo (menacing): How are you going to stop me with harsh language? By whining about it? Indecisive Nailah. Poor Nailah, the eternal victim. You don't know what really pain is. What struggle is? You think being black is a struggle. How about being the most powerful woman in the world and being powerless to watch yourself being stripped raw by your husband, by your ungrateful daughter!
Nailah: You are loathsome!
Nailah steps forward towards the stroller as Jo steps in her way.
Jo (threatening): You're not taking my only chance of recouping what is mine! Go back to whining about your pathetic life and write insipid books for the ignorant masses!
Nailah: Crazy lady, tricks are for kids!
Nailah dodges then pushes Jo aside as Pascal turns to get away with the stroller with Baby Jessica in it. Nailah stops her by grabbing her arm. Pascal releases the stroller allowing it to continue gaining momentum, rolling into the parking lot, to confront Nailah. Nailah ducks one arm swing, and other, then she lands a solid southpaw punch, squarely into Pascal's nose. Down she goes, holding her nose, but not holding back her freely flowing blood. Nailah chases after the rolling stroller and scoops sleeping Baby Jessica out of it, carrying her towards Angry Man's car.
Jo runs behind her.
Jo: Give me back that baby! Police! Police! She stole my baby!
The crowd watches as Pascal writhes on the ground holding a bleeding nose, Nailah runs off with the baby and Jo chases after her. Nailah quickly reaches the VW and jumps in the back seat holding Baby Jessica. Jo grabs Angry Man by the arm as he shuts the passenger rear door. He yanks her hand away.
Angry Man: Get your paws off of me!
Jo: Police! Police! She stole my baby!
Nailah: I'm a black woman with a mixed race baby so you better hit the gas pedal or we're gonna have a lot to explain to some trigger happy cops.
Angry Man jumps in the car as Jo frantically jumps on top of the car's hood. Angry Man dumps Jo off the hood of the car and onto the asphalt by speeding up in reverse. He puts the car in drive heading back toward the ferry terminal In Swartz Bay. In the back seat, Nailah curiously looks at the baby sleeping fretfully, wondering what she was going to do next.
Since there was no infant car seat, she adjusted the baby in her arms and pulled her cell phone out of her jean pocket. She dialed a familiar number quickly with one finger.
Amanda: Hello?
Nailah: I found her.
Amanda: Oh god Nailah? You found Jessie?
Nailah: Yeah. What kinda name is Jessie? That's a boy's name. You gonna confuse this kid!
Amanda: Is she ok?
Nailah: She's sleeping. Your mother and her lackey are on Vancouver Island at some gardens. One of them probably has a broken nose.
Amanda: My mother has a broken nose?
Nailah: Unfortunately not her.
Amanda: Where are you?
Nailah: Look she's safe with me. Keep the book, keep my stolen eggs. I'll take care of Jessie. May have to change her name though. What were you thinking?
Then Nailah disconnected the call.
Angry Man: She may fight you for that kid.
Nailah: Any sane court will see just how looney tunes she is. I'm the more stable choice. Oh my God! I just realized, I'm a parent!
-----
On the ferry ride back to the ferry terminal in Tsawwassen, Nailah looked at the infant girl sleeping peacefully with cool detachment.
I never knew my father , she thought.
He was a ghost, a ghost of indifference. He came around once when I was three years old as new fathers are apt to do, I suppose to make sure I looked like him or more correctly as some empty societal gesture to appear as though fatherhood was an event he wanted to experience.
But I don't remember him. These events were told to me by my Auntie which she supported with evidence of a picture of my father holding my thirty minutes old self in his long sleeveless medium brown arms.
When I was five years old, I once studied that picture, closely examining his eyes and the smirk that sat across his lips wondering what it was he thought. I entertained the idea that my father travelled around the world and was thinking of his great adventures.
My adult mind however logically concludes he was probably counting the minutes when he could leave me behind and never look back. Yeah I think that's really what that smirk meant. My heart saddens when I realize that I'm kinda thinking the same thing about this child in my arms.
Please Stand Clear of the Closing Doors
Amanda nervously stood in front of the door of the apartment on the top floor in the three story brownstone. Although she had the address tripled checked for accuracy she was worried that Nailah may have disappeared again. She listened to the closed apartment door and heard the sounds of life: a TV with it's volume up too loud, the loud booming laughter of a man's voice and the muffled sounds of a baby.
She knocked on the door with determination.
“Who is it?” a deep male voiced inquired.
Amanda: Publishers Clearing House… you won.
The man asked: Won what?
Amanda: Your wildest dreams.
The numerous locks on the door opened in syncopated succession. George's curiosity greeted Amanda's frown.
George: What did you say?
Amanda: Where is Nailah?
George (totally recognizing Amanda): There's no one here by that name. Try those Eastern Europeans on the first floor.
Amanda (keeping the door open with her outstretched arm): Nailah isn't an Eastern European name. I know she's here with with MY daughter!
George: We don't have any daughters here, lady.
A female voice from deep inside the apartment: George I told you not to play this TV so loud! You'll disrupt Jessie's cognitive development!
Amanda smiles mercilessly as George rolls his eyes. He attempts to close the door in Amanda's face but she manages to get half of her body into the open doorway.
George (struggles to close the door): I could shoot you for just touching this door.
Amanda (struggles to open the door): Only if I were trespassing.
George: You are trespassing!
Amanda: How can I be trespassing when I own this building!
George stops immediately and the voice from inside the apartment speaks once again.
Nailah (yells from another room): George! Tell ‘em we're pagans who refuse to be saved. Under no circumstance will we entertain unwelcome solicitation! Honestly George, if you weren't expecting anyone why did you answer the door?
George is gently pushed aside as Nailah emerges holding a content baby sucking on her favorite 100% Organic Hemp heather gray shirt. The thoughts of whether or not the baby would get a buzz from this suckling quickly disappeared from Nailah's mind in the vista of a royally pissed off Amanda, who stood inside her apartment threshold, hands akimbo.
Amanda: Honestly who says “solicitation” in America these days?
Nailah: I want to expand her vocabulary don't I? Besides we aren't in America anymore so I don't have to aim so low, cognitively speaking.
Nailah eyes Amanda and matches her mien.
George: Says she owns the building.
Nailah: Does she?
Amanda (totally recognizing George): There seems to be only one player in this farce I don't know.
Nailah rolls her eyes and walks back into the apartment carrying the amused Baby Jessica, the new queen of the land self absorbed. George looks at Nailah's retreating back then at Amanda. He extends his hand. Amanda takes it bringing her further into the apartment.
George (flirts): I'm George.
Amanda: Yes I heard her bellow. Who you are isn't in question. What is your function?
George (flirts): Excuse me? I'm sorry you want something to drink?
Amanda: Thirst is not my primary concern at the moment. I'm thinking more along the lines of calling the police. Perhaps the FBI. Whether or not you're an innocent or an enemy combatant will be determined by your function in this drama.
George (proudly): I was Nailah's fiance until we found out she was married… to you.
Amanda: Enemy combatant.
Nailah (burping a giggling Jessie): I'd like to know how you found us.
Amanda: It's amazing how resourceful one can be when SOMEONE who supposed to rescue your child DOESN'T RETURN HER TO HER MOTHER!
Nailah: Really? It that like when SOMEONE STEALS YOUR EGGS!
George not wanting to listen to an long night concert of the talented and very loud Jessica, tries to calm the ladies by shushing them. An act Western men have learnt the hard way is seen as much of an affront to women worldwide as having someone jab a splinter in one's eyes.
Duly chastised George sulks away from the hostile women to sit once again on the couch, watching the TV on mute, not really cognizant of what he was watching as he ritualistically scanned all the 2000 channels of mindless entertainment the digital cable box provided.
Baby Jessica wasn't amused either. For some reason the one who smelled good, made her laugh, kept her stomach full and her bottom clean seemed upset and very nervous, which made Jessica feel upset and nervous, sensations she didn't like at all. She recalled being happy and liked that sensation. She recalled being a bit scared and confused and she didn't care too much for either sensation.
This vague sense of being out of control was definitely not a favorite in the hit parade of emotions she was experiencing over the past few months. So Jessica made her discomfort known immediately with loud crying knowing that her favorite person in existence will promptly set her world right.
Jessica also decided that she would reward her favorite person with one of her a special gifts for this service and in the midst of all her crying she burped a clear bubble of surprise that she made her first executive decision in early days of her reign.
Amanda: Give her to me!
Nailah reluctantly allowed Amanda to take Jessica in her arms.
Baby Jessica felt a new sensation which jolted her small body. It was this very familiar smelling person. She recalled missing this presence very much and very angry that this person disappeared so abruptly from her realm. She didn't like the absence of this special person one bit. This warm and wonderful person was not like the newer funny, scratchy person who didn't have soft bumps on his chest like her favorite and this special one did. She felt pity for the flat chested, hard bodied creature who made her laugh.
It surprised Baby Jessica that there would be two persons who could make her world better just by existing. Baby Jessica gave the magical, familiar person a broad smile just before yawning, since all this newness was so tiring for such a new young monarch. Baby Jessica's last executive decision was to demand that this person must always be present and never allowed to disappear like that again. It was too upsetting. She decided that she would make that the new law right after she rewarded her favorite with a gift. Whatever laws were.
Another yawn then it was decided the gift giving could wait until after a short nap. These naps were very perplexing losses of consciousness but Baby Jessica decided she'd live with them for now until she could figure out a way to banish them forever.
As Jessica slept cradled in Amanda's arms. Nailah nervously paced the parquet floor of her apartment. She stood in front of Amanda and took sleeping Jessica out of Amanda's reluctant arms to lay her down in her crib in the back bedroom.
Amanda: I'm not leaving here without MY child.
Nailah ignores her.
George: She's happy here with us.
Amanda: I wasn't talking to you, Curious George.
George: What kind of crack was that?
Amanda: This doesn't concern you so leave before you get in any deeper.
George: I'm not about to leave Nailah alone to deal with you.
Amanda: She's more than capable.
Amanda looks at George up and down. She ponders the thought that Nailah being biologically linked to Jessica could pose a considerable custody dispute should Nailah provide the court with a suitable prospective “Daddy”. Having researched every minutia of detail about Sir George's life she found he was very boring except for the one skeleton in his closet that she would exploit.
Amanda: How much?
George: What?
Amanda: Are you having difficulty hearing me or is English your second language? (repeat): How much?
George: There isn't enough money to make me leave Nailah's side. I'm going to protect her and Jessica from you!
Amanda: How antiquated! Did you miss the memo?
George (perplexed): What memo?
Amanda: The memo from all men to all men. I've read it. How'd you miss it? As I recalled it, now remember I'm paraphrasing. Quote, all women are gold digging femi-nazies. (sic) Selfish bitches. All hail the pimp may his reign be eternal. End quote. How'd you miss it?
George: You're insane!
Amanda: How much?
She reaches into her stylish Coach™ shoulder purse to pull out her personal checkbook. George walks to the front door and opens it.
George: You need to leave now.
Amanda (with a fine pen poised in her hand): One million?
George blinks.
Amanda: Two million?
George (smirking): Five million.
Amanda: Done. Do you have an account? It will be faster as a wire transfer.
George (laughs): Yeah right you're gonna just give me five million dollars?
Amanda: With strings attached.
George: What do you want for five million dollars?
Amanda: For you to disappear.
George: You can't be serious.
Amanda pulls out her cell phone and pushes one button on it.
Amanda: Yes. I'm in a prime position to make an acquisition. Five million.
George: Six million.
Amanda (corrects): Six million.
George is hyperventilating.
Amanda: Just need your account routing number.
George scrambles away from the open front door over to his wallet laying on the coffee table. He frantically searches until he finds his folded cancelled blank check hidden away in a forgotten slot of his wallet. He hands it to Amanda, who quickly reads the numbers from the cancelled check into the phone.
Amanda smiles as she disconnects the call and hands the cancelled blank check back to George.
Amanda: No contact from this moment on or our arrangement is off.
George: Six million dollars!
Amanda: Why don't to go and enjoy your new found wealth?
George: Now?
Amanda: Right now.
George slips his white socked feet into his sneakers nestled by the door. He turns and looks hesitantly at the closed bedroom door down the long hallway. He shamefully lowers his head then looks up smiling.
George: I'm rich!
Amanda: Welcome to the club! It wasn't nice knowing you.
George leaves the apartment closing the door behind him.
In the back bedroom, while watching Jessica sleep. Nailah ponders an escape route as she eyes the fire escape outside the gated window to the bedroom.
With a sigh, Nailah is tired, willing to take her chances with the courts. She is Jessica's biological parent. Perhaps she could get those religious nuts on her side during the fight to come. And she had to consider George in all this. He could be very helpful.
And then Nailah remembered.
Detective Nailah didn't like the loud silence of the rest of the apartment. She didn't even hear George's incessant flipping the channel with the remote.
Nailah turned on the baby monitor and left the bedroom keeping the door open. She walked down the hallway back into the living room to find Amanda alone sitting on her couch.
Nailah: Where is George?
Amanda: He left.
Nailah: Why would he leave?
Amanda: He had a better offer than a pre-made family.
Nailah: What did you do?
Amanda (in a horrible Marlon Brando imitation): I made him an offer he couldn't refuse.
Nailah: You killed him?
She looks frantically around the apartment for the dead body. Amanda rolled her eyes.
Amanda: Did you know Georgie liked to spend 1,000 dollars a week on lottery tickets? He likes to place bets on the ponies, long shots on football and basketball and he has a weekly poker game where he loses more than he wins.
Nailah: Most men like to gamble. It's in their DNA.
Amanda: He'll have a lot to play with now.
Nailah: What did you do?
Amanda (smiling): Six million.
Nailah: You gave him six million dollars?
Amanda: A wise investment, at a bargain price. He's probably going to lose most of it in the first year. I have some stake in a few of institutions of chance. So much of it will probably come right back to me. Hmm. Wait until he sees the taxes he has to pay out. I'd love to see his face when he sees that IRS bill.
Nailah: Six million dollars?
Amanda: I would have given up all my money for my daughter. She is worth more than anything I own.
Hood Rat Nailah: How we gonna get rid of deep pockets?
-----
Nailah looked at Amanda over the rim of her raised mug. She had been nervously nursing a cup of hot green tea until it became cold and the sweetener fell out of the leafy solution to pool at the bottom of the mug. Amanda was rocking the deeply sleeping Baby Jessica.
Nailah: She sleeps through anything. She slept the whole time from when I took her away from your mother.
Amanda: That woman has been a thorn in my side all my life!
Nailah: She's been watching you for a long time.
Amanda: Who?
Nailah: Your mother. She “bumped” into me one day when I was celebrating my birthday, by taking in a movie, a year ago. Became my friend. I can't believe I was going to let her stay with me if she came back up here to visit! She was helping me get back at YOU. In fact, she gave me something to use against you. I was reluctant to do that but given the circumstances I'm forced to.
Amanda: She gave you the “run down” about how deprived I am? Or let me guess she told you I'm gay! I don't care what she's told you about me, I'm not giving up my daughter!
Nailah: She'd be better off with me. No offense but you're crazy. You're mother is crazy. I don't know about your father but having such a strong crazy gene and having access to mass quantities of resources is a recipe for disaster. Look at what happened.
Amanda: My daughter is NOT a disaster! I will bury you in court if you try to take her away from me!
Nailah: With what money?
Amanda: I'm the rich heiress, remember?
Nailah: Are you sure?
Amanda: What are you getting at?
Nailah: It must have killed your mother to sit on this information all these years and not be able to hit you with it. Because I now realize if she did, she would be left with nothing.
Amanda: What the hell are you talking about?
Nailah: Let me tell you a story which I can back up because I throughly researched it. Jacob George De Klerk was the sole heir of the De Klerk fortune. When he was a young man on the verge of entering the family business he befriended a nervous, studious young man named Gerald McGnathy. They became fast friends because they were complete opposites of each other.
Amanda: I know this story, I lived it remember.
Nailah: Jacob was a scoundrel while for all intents and purposes, Gerald was a saint. A saint with a dark secret back in those days. He was a gay man very much in love with his very straight, best friend. Jacob had many opportunities to father many children given his exploits but he never did and not because he used protection. Years later he met and fell in deep lust with a young woman, Joanne Zwart, sole heiress to her family's millions. Because they were from the same social class, Jacob married her. But there were three people in that marriage, Jacob, Joanne and Gerald. Jacob had soon taken many lovers after a month of monogamy. That didn't concern Joanne because she grew tired of married life as well but she had to provide an heir before she could live a separate life. She knew what Gerald was and she realized Gerald deeply loved Jacob. When she learnt that Jacob was infertile she seduced Gerald and was soon pregnant with child.
Amanda: What does all that have to do with me?
Nailah: Jacob wasn't a stupid man, he knew something was awry. It took some time for scientific technology to catch up with his suspicions. A decade or so later, suspicions confirmed, Jacob had a violent and public fight with his best friend. Gerald was devastated. He then confronted Joanne and was shocked to learn from her Gerald was gay and was in love with him. That baby girl was YOU. If you fight me, I will release the evidence that your lawyer Gerald McGnathy is in fact your father not Jacob George De Klerk. Then you will no longer have access to the billions to, how did you put it “bury me in court”.
Amanda: She's lying! That all she does is spread lies about me!
Nailah: Why do you think Gerald was so close to you over the years? If he doesn't know, I think he suspects. You probably felt closer to him than to the man you thought was your father. The real evidence was a DNA test that Jacob took that proved he wasn't your father. Jo had a copy of it all these years and gave it to me. If she revealed this information herself, all those billions would go back to the foundation as Jacob's will decreed, if he died without any heirs. If I revealed this, to get back at you, she was probably certain, in gratitude, I would give alot of the hush money I received to her or she'd just take it. But when you had the baby that was too tempting for her to resist.
Amanda sobs uncontrollably.
Nailah: I promise I'll take care of her. I may not be rich but I will give her a loving home. She will have all of me. My wisdom and my compassion. I honestly don't want to reveal such a private thing about you to the world. I hated it when the press was clamoring for more information about me. It was physically painful to go through all that. Spare yourself. Spare Jessica. She already has a lifetime to deal with the fact that she came into being unconventionally and there are people who would probably rejoice if her life were to turn out horribly to prove that she should have never been conceived the way she was. I'll protect her.
Amanda: I can't! I won't. It would destroy me to walk out of her life. I admit I was indifferent at first, then when I wanted to be closer to her… now I just can't. I meant what I said, I'd give everything up for her.
Nailah: Then we are at an impasse.
Amanda: Help me. Help me raise her.
Nailah: You really want me to help raise YOU! I don't raise grown folks. Oh my god! I just sounded like Auntie!!!
Amanda: I'm serious. Help me raise her. She needs both of us.
Nailah: Like some skewed nuclear family? I think not! I'm the last person you'd want on a gay family poster.
Amanda (defeated): I'll have the marriage annulled.
Nailah (excited): And go to the press and tell the whole world how you stalked me, tricked me and I'm NOT gay! Then I'll consider compromising. And not just print media, TV too!
Amanda: I'm NOT a stalker! But okay I choose E all the above. So do we have a deal?
Nailah looked at Amanda with a skeptical eye.
Nailah: No offense but you are your mother's daughter.
Amanda: I'm my father's daughter too. He is an honorable man whose neck I'm gonna wring if he knew about all this.
Nailah: I have to confer with a friend of mine. He has the inside scoop on how to deal with situations like this.
Amanda: George?
Nailah: My angry running dog. He helped me get Jessica back. Why Jessica again?
Amanda: Jessica was the name of my favorite mare. We won all of first place ribbons at equestrian meets when I was a teenager.
Nailah: You named MY KID after a horse? I've got my work cut out for me don't I?
Amanda was about to answer, when her cell phone rang. She answered it. Listening Amanda stood up abruptly causing Nailah to take sleeping Baby Jessica in her arms. Ending her phone call Amanda turns newly teared eyes toward Nailah.
Nailah: What's up now?
Amanda: They have Pascal in custody but my mother got away. Gerald is at Carlton Hospital . Someone tried to kill him!
-----
Nailah took Baby Jessica back to her apartment to be doted on by Auntie, who fell instantly in love with her, while Amanda went to the hospital to check up on Gerald.
Auntie: So you two finally straightened all this mess out?
Nailah: Soon I'll be a free woman again! Not child-free of course. I've signed up for the 18 plus years mission but I will no on longer, on paper, be married. Let there be rejoicing in the streets!
Auntie: She's divorcing you?
Nailah: She's having the marriage annulled.
Auntie: Annulled means no financial settlement. Divorce means financial settlement. You sure you don't want a divorce?
Nailah: A divorce suggests that I voluntarily went into this and found out it was a mistake. Divorce also places the veneer of gay over me. I am happy, quite contented, still NOT gay. Annulment means I was used and tricked. And clearly shows me as not gay, never was.
Auntie: What happens if the rich gay woman dies before you? Married then divorced, you can provide for your child. Annulled, you're on your own. I'm just saying.
Nailah: Am I the only non-materialistic person on this planet?
-----
Amanda walked into Gerald private hospital room. Gerald was a asleep on the bed. Wearing an oxygen mask he looked older than she had ever seen him.
Amanda walked up to the bed and place a gentle hand on his own resting by his side. She leaned towards him and place a kiss on his forehead.
Amanda (whispers): You better not die on me old man. You and I have a lot of things to talk about and I refuse to have a one sided conversation. You got me? We found Jessie, she's safe. You have to stick around so she'll get to know you too.
Unconscious, Gerald squeezed Amanda's hand and she smiled.
-----
At Vancouver International Airport , Seun, Auntie and JB accompanied Amanda, Nailah, and Baby Jessica to the airport for their flight back to the City. Auntie decided to stay in Vancouver with JB and his family for an even longer visit, leaving the house back in the City in Nailah's care, until she returned.
Nailah oversaw her trusty Tyrone being packed for shipping back to the City.
Amanda: What do you need that thing for?
Nailah: That is Tyrone. Tyrone, the troublesome rich lady named Amanda. Where I go, he goes. We have this simpatico relationship.
Amanda: A motorcycle is not practical in the city.
Nailah: All I rode, on beside my road bike, in Vancouver CITY , was Tyrone! Besides I can't leave by best guy behind. He'll sulk. I'll sulk. We'll both sulk! Not good.
Amanda: This is Canada where people see each other as somewhat human. We're going back to where all terrain means pedestrians and people riding motorbikes, are fair game to drive on. Don't anthropomorphize a potentially maiming contraption!
Nailah: We should stay here then. In Vancouver . We like it here.
Amanda: I wouldn't mind being bicoastal. We can come back and I'll buy a place. But I need to be back in the City though. My headquarters is there not here.
Nailah: Or I will BUY a place. I am making a bit of money from my writing.
Amanda: That's nice dear but I need more than a BIT space and so will Jessica.
Nailah was about to reply when she noticed the airport shipping agents putting shipping decals DIRECTLY on the chrome of her beloved Tyrone. She rushed off to protect her motorcycle.
Ivette: Amanda?
Amanda turned around and saw her ex-girlfriend Ivette. She groaned. She hadn't started the annulment procedure yet because she wanted Gerald to handle it as well as some other issues concerning both Nailah and Jessica's wellbeing, as soon as he was able. The irony was she was married to a woman who didn't want her and wanted by a woman she wanted desperately to avoid.
Amanda: Hi Ivette.
Ivette: I thought that was you. I was thinking about you when I heard about the kidnapping. Then I saw you here. I see divine providence in this, don't you?
Amanda: Everything is fine now. She back with us sound and safe.
Ivette: Us??
Amanda pointed to the over-grown child cooing over her stupid motorcycle, talking to it in public!
Amanda (whispered): My wife… Nailah.
Ivette (disappointed): Oh you've gotten back together with HER?
Nailah: Gotten back together with who?
Amanda: Excuse us for a minute.
She pulls Nailah aside.
Amanda: Long story short. She's an ex, heard you and I we're married, learned that you and I didn't live in the same place and that I was alone during my pregnancy, so--
Nailah: --she wants to start up again where you two left off and you don't want to play that game anymore right?
Amanda: Yeah.
Nailah: So which one am I good cop or bad cop?
Amanda: What?
Nailah: Sickening friendly or mean and angry, which one?
Amanda: You'd do that for me.
Nailah: You'll OWE me BIG time.
Amanda: Go with bad cop. I beg you.
Nailah (yells): Oh that Ivette! How about I eviscerate her right here? And break her boney legs! If I turn around right now and I still see that slimly toad you call an ex-girlfriend I'm gonna tear her a new a-hole and she better not be on our flight! I'll throw her ass of the plane myself. Ten more years in prison is a cake walk!
Amanda watched amazed as Ivette bumped into people as she frantically ran away to change her flight back home to another time, perhaps another day.
Amanda (amazed): Wow!
Nailah: Never underestimate the usefulness of racism. There's something potent about the mythology of the angry black woman.
Amanda: What???
Nailah: I wish you met my homeboy from my poetry therapy group. I learned a great deal about anger potency from him. As a matter of fact I met him because of you.
Amanda: What poetry therapy group?
Nailah: “The Trouble with Women” group.