DISCLAIMERS: in Part 1

Hidden Desires, Part 20

©2003 -Vertigo-

Brooke walked slowly with Fred, she had a lot of info to digest. She went over the conversation in the diner with furrowed brows, then what her mother had said. No matter how she looked at it, it was obvious, Cayden was afraid. Afraid of me... afraid of love... Brooke sighed heavily. I need to make her comfortable with me. She needs to know there's no pressure for anything serious. I have to make it all about having fun. Brooke nodded to herself, pleased at her decision, then she giggled at her next thought. She wants me, I don't have to worry about that, I just need her to relax when it comes to us. Us. What us? There isn't an us. Brooke pursed her lips, then raised an eyebrow. There's definitely sex, she's hot for me for sure, but sex isn't an option right now... that's going to take a while... isn't it? Hmm. The blonde started walking back to her mom's place with a slow smile spreading across her lips. Not really, it's certainly there. We get so carried away with a kiss... given the opportunity, there's no telling... yeah right. If I can keep her in front of me after the damned kiss. WAIT! I got it... Cayden's uptight about sex! Why didn't I think of that? Brooke's eyes widened. That's the problem here! She only runs when sex becomes involved. Ooo, she needs to loosen up about sex, and THAT I can handle.

**********************

Cayden appeared to be going about her day, but if you looked closely, you'd notice she hadn't strayed more than two feet from the phone. She even took it to the bathroom with her, giving La La the excuse that you never know who's going to call and offer her a million dollars to eat a bug. With no incoming calls by dinnertime, Cayden began pouting her way into the kitchen. She stuck her head in the freezer and narrowed her eyes at the food as if it was the food's fault that Brooke didn't call. She picked up practically everything and put it down again, finally deciding on a cheeseburger and tater tots, with a healthy helping of pickles to make her feel better. She noticed that the burgers were fused in one hunk, Wade apparently threw them together when he put them away and try as she might, she couldn't pry them apart. She growled now, having no choice but to cook two burgers. "Well Wade, you get dinner by default." In her sour mood, she briefly thought about burning his on purpose but then sanity made her realize it wasn't his fault any more than the frozen burgers which she was banging rhythmically on the counter. If Brooke didn't want to talk to her, it was her own damned fault for acting like an ass. She threw the meat one more ugly look as she put it in the microwave to defrost, then sat and stared at the phone until the oven beeped.

Wade ran in the door, eye's wide and tongue hanging out. "Did you call? What happened? Do you have a date? Did she fall down in a faint when you thanked her and then hit her head and now she's in the hospital with a big white bandage?"

Cayden snorted. "You're so funny I just wet myself."

"Well?" He yelled as he ran into his room to change out of his work clothes.

"She wasn't home, I left a message with the mother." She speared a pickle out of the jar.

Wade snatched the pickle and began to eat it. "You spoke to the mother? What was she like?"

"Actually, she wasn't that bad. Oh, she questioned me, but there was no inquisition."

Cayden moved away from the counter and Wade noticed two plates of food. "Oh my my! First breakfast and now this!" He feigned shock.

"You sabotaged the burgers, I had no choice." she shoved a plate at him and sat down with her own.

"You have more pickles than me." He pouted.

"I'm allowed. I cooked." Cayden said, trying to discretely locate the phone.

Wade sat down, then jumped up, pulling the cordless out from under him. He raised an eyebrow at her as she grabbed the phone away and put it on her lap. "New best friend?" He asked.

"Don't be a wise ass."

Wade just noticed there was something seriously wrong. "Where's La La?" he asked meekly, remembering Cayden's threat.

"Don't worry, I didn't off him." She chuckled. "At least not yet. I locked him in your room. He was driving me insane for tater tots."

Cayden checked the phone for a dial tone as Wade ran inside to free his cat. The tall brunette waited for the sound of the fat cat galloping through the house. La La didn't disappoint her. Cayden watched with unconcealed glee as he came flying into the kitchen, attempted a screeching halt at her feet, but instead slid helplessly across the linoleum and slammed into the stove. "Serves you right," she told Wade as he tried to console his dizzy cat. "You shoulda took a tot in there to appease him."

Just then the phone rang and Wade tried to take it away from Cayden. They fought over the phone until they heard the tell-tale beep that in the fracas someone had turned it on. They both froze and finally Cayden growled, yanked the phone away just as Wade let go and she flew back into the fridge. "Ooof!" was the greeting.

"Hello?" came the tentative reply.

Cayden glared at her snickering room mate and rubbed her sore shoulder. "Uh hi."

"Cayden? It's Brooke."

"I know!" She said with more enthusiasm than she wanted.

Wade started dancing around the kitchen singing, "Its Brooke! Brooke's on the phone!"

"Shut up" Cayden hissed, then paled. "Uh.. not you... its just that Wade was..." She blushed.

"No, its alright. Did I catch you at a bad time?" Brooke wondered at the odd behavior.

"No, its okay." She assured.

"So, I hear you called, mom hasn't stopped talking about it all day. You left quite an impression."

"Well... you know... she's a mother and all."

"Mom can be a pain in the ass. Thank you for being polite to her, I know it must have been hard for you." Brooke teased. "

"She was nice enough."

The silence grew and became uncomfortable. Brooke licked her lips and continued. "So, you called..."

"Yeah, I um, just wanted to thank you for bringing me soup and stuff." Cayden said awkwardly.

Wade applauded silently in the background and Cayden tried to shoo him away.

"Aw, it was my pleasure, even if you didn't behave."

"I didn't feel well." Cayden explained.

"I knew that. So, listen, maybe we can get together again under better circumstances?"

Cayden was greatly relieved that Brooke had asked and she didn't have to. "Sure. Maybe we can have dinner or something."

Wade swooned. "She did it.. she really did it." he pretended to weep.

Cayden rolled her eyes and left the kitchen for privacy.

"That sounds good, do you cook?" Brooke wondered.

"No, aside form the occasional burger and breakfast, I'm not that great. Wade's the chef."

"He's a chef?"

"Oh, not really, he's the bra police, but he's a good cook too."

Brooke laughed. "Bra Police?"

"Yeah." Cayden laughed too. She liked how it felt when Brooke laughed. "He's a security guard in a lingerie shop."

"Ooo, really? It may pay to get on his good side." Brooke said with a grin.

"If you like that sort of thing." Cayden replied. She got a mental glimpse of Brooke in a camisole and stockings and had to swallow hard so she wouldn't groan out loud. "Besides, you don't have to work too hard, he loves you already."

"Does that help my case with you? I mean that your friends like me?"

"It sure doesn't hurt." Cayden said quietly.

Silence once again took over and Brooke knew Cayden was getting weird. "So, maybe we could all get together as a group, you know, Wade and Jodie, me and you. Would that be cool with you?"

Cayden felt much more at ease with the suggestion. "Sure, that sounds great!"

"I have to confess, I want to see you before this weekend, can we get together Wednesday?"

Cayden blushed guiltily, as much as she was afraid, she wanted to see Brooke right now, not Wednesday. "That's fine. I'll tell Wade and Jodie."

"I'll meet you at work then. It's a date!" Brooke said happily.

"Yeah." Cayden smiled brightly. "It is."

************************

Brooke hung up the phone, giddy with excitement. She scooped Fred up off of the floor and began jumping up and down on her bed. "I have a date with Cayden! How cool is that?" She stopped jumping when Fred's ears flattened in a panic. "Sorry little buddy, I got carried away." She sat down and smiled at Cayden's almost monosyllabic half of the conversation. "Just got to get her to relax. That should be easy, especially with Wade and Jodie there. She should open up much easier. Jodie tells me Cayden has a really neat sense of humor, I bet I'd like it...I bet you'd like it too." she told the dog, who licked the tip of her nose. "You know something Freddy, I think Cayden is worth all the trouble I'm going through. I just feel it inside... and don't ask me exactly what it is, cuz I don't know. All I know is that its there."

******************

Cayden breathed out a sigh of relief. "That wasn't so bad." She grimaced, suddenly remembering that she offered up Wade without his knowledge. "Shit. That'll cost me." She put on her best guilty smile and went out to face the music.

"What happened? When's the date?" Wade asked expectantly.

Cayden noticed all her pickles were gone and she bit back a scowl in favor of the puppy dog look.

"What?" He asked nervously, "I know that face Cayden. What did you do?"

"The date is Wednesday night and you're invited."

"What? What the heck kind of date is that?"

"You're free Wednesday, right?"

"Yeah but..."

"Good, then you won't mind cooking for all of us then." Cayden said with her best sweet and innocent look.

"All of us?" Wade narrowed his eyes. "Cayden..." he said with a warning in his voice.

"Please Wade! I'll feel so much more comfortable with you and Jodie here." she said, blinking rapidly.

Wade thought about making her beg, but she was trying so hard to look pathetic that he gave in. "Oh alright."

Cayden picked him up out of his chair and began twirling him in circles. "Thank you!"

"I just ate!" He complained.

"That's ok, I cooked, you'll clean."

"You'd make me clean my own puke?"

She put him down and plopped into her chair to finish dinner. "Yep."

"What will I cook?" He asked already rooting through the fridge.

"Small things. Nothing gross looking and nothing I have to chew with my mouth open."

Wade raised an eyebrow. "Such as..."

"Spicy stuff. Anything that requires the intake of air as I chew."

"Ah, gotchya. And no garlic either. This is a date after all." he winked.

"It's not that kind of date." she said around a mouthful of food.

"We'll see."

****************************

The next day at work, Cayden could think of nothing else but Wednesday. She wondered what Brooke was going to wear, what Wade was going to cook, if Jodie would behave herself... if there'd be another kiss. Every time she thought about the kiss, her stomach jumped. It would be stupid of her to deny that she had feelings for Brooke, but Cayden was terrified of relationships. Try as they might, no one could figure out why, and Cayden wasn't talking. The last time Jodie tried, Cayden threw up and she didn't want a repeat of that incident so she backed off. Wade and Jodie were at a loss. They knew Cayden better than she knew herself and the fact that they couldn't break this one drove them crazy. They both wanted to see Cayden happy, the poor thing moped around half her life, and they saw the opportunity in Brooke to give their friend that lift. Cayden was fighting it hard though, they were very glad Brooke didn't give up easy.

Cayden turned to the television in hopes of some distraction when she came across Jeff Corwin. The poor guy, good looking as he is and no ass whatsoever. Cayden wasn't one for reptiles as much as things with fur, but somehow Jeff made it easy to get interested and she soon fell deeply into the show.

"You have got to be kidding me. Eyelash Viper? That has to be the lamest scary name in the entire wild kingdom. Oooo, the dreaded eyelash viper... scary...."

Eventually, Jodie popped in, and Cayden grimaced, ready for the tirade.

"Of all the nerve! You purposely waited until I walked out of the house this morning to leave me that message."

The waitress had a hand on her hip and what looked to be a cold refreshing Pepsi in the other. "For me?" Cayden asked.

"Absolutely not." Jodie wagged her finger. "Penny Pingleton you are permanently punished."

"Oh lord, she's quoting Hairspray."

"Okay, I'm over it." Jodie announced, sitting down next to Cayden. "Can I bring a date to your date?"

The tall woman looked at her in horror. "No way!"

"Then what will I do with Angela?" Jodie asked in all seriousness, opening the Pepsi.

"Set her up with Thursday night." Cayden teased.

"I will not! Thursday night is very special." Jodie huffed.

"You are such a slut." The tall woman stared at the can of soda "Are you going to drink that or tease me with it?"

"Ooo, so you're that easy huh?"

"Well, you'd have to do better than that." Cayden chuckled, pointing to the waitress uniform.

"Get over it, I'd have to be Brooke. Speaking of... how'd we arrive at this date?"

"I called Brooke to thank her for taking care of me when I was ... ill."

Jodie silenced Cayden with a raised hand. "WAIT! Stop! You did what?"

"You heard me."

"You thanked her? You?" Jodie asked in disbelief.

cayden rolled her eyes. "Yes, I did. Denise thought it would be the right thing to do."

"Denise??? I'm lost."

"Oh yeah, we had breakfast, we made out some, then she told me I should call Brooke and thank her. Said it would get us talking."

Both Jodie's eyebrows flew up high. "You went from making out to Brooke?"

"Yeah, it pissed me off too." Cayden agreed.

Jodie sniffed the Pepsi then handed it over to Cayden. "Is this spiked?" she asked of the soda which Cayden happily accepted with a long swig then a loud belch. "Charming."

"Nope. Its good." she said, holding the can away from Jodie. "It's mine now. You gave it to me."

"Cayd, I don't understand, what happened with Denise that led to Brooke?"

Cayden tried to wriggle away the uncomfortable feeling she had recalling the incident with Denise. "Aw, it was nothing, we got carried away, realized it was wrong. That's all."

Jodie sniffled and wiped her eyes with the bottom of Cayden's shirt. "Cayden's all grown up now. Where has the time gone?"

"Hey! You're stretching my shirt!"

Jodie snapped out of it quickly and giggled like a schoolgirl. "So what else happened?"

"I spoke to Brooke's mom." Cayden offered.

"Really? What's she like?"

"She's cool, as far as moms go. Her dad sounds funny though, he was making wisecracks in the background the whole time. She invited me over but didn't say when."

"Are you going to go?" Jodie's eyes bugged out.

"Not sure. Let me get through Wednesday first."

"Oh yes, about that... what body part did you have to sell to Wade to get him to cook?"

"Oddly enough, I didn't even have to beg."

"Wow. He really does like Brooke as much as I do."

"So you guys really think this could all work out on my favor?"

"If you give it half the chance, sure. Why not?" Jodie nodded.

"She's too... she's just too too, ya know?"

"Cayd, since I know you, all you've ever dated were insincere assholes only after your looks, and a few awful blind dates. The only relationship you had was dating the same girl, Anna, for 2 months and we know how that turned out, she left you... OH MY GOD! She left you for a man! Cayden Riley is this what you're so afraid of?" Jodie stood up with her epiphany.

Cayden slunk down in her chair.

Jodie squatted down between Cayden's knees to look her in the eyes. "Are you freaking because you think Brooke's going to leave you for a man?" How the hell did we forget that?

"We aren't even together, how can she leave me?"

"That's it! You know, you can't think every one you are attracted to is going to do that."

"What's stopping her?"

"Cayden, she's different."

"How do you know?" Cayden mumbled.

Jodie thought about it. "Actually, I don't know, but I have a feeling."

"A feeling." Cayden deadpanned.

"Okay, so you can't base everything on my feeling, but Cayd, I've spoken to Brooke much more than you have, Wade too. She genuinely likes you, she wants you and cares about you."

"She hardly knows me for shit sakes." Cayden snorted.

"She feels as if she does. She wouldn't have gone through the shit she has if you we an experiment. Think about it! She totally set herself up for all sorts of hell by confronting you about Grant, confessing she dreams about you... PLUS, she took care of you when you were sick. If she were only interested in one thing, she wouldn't be bothered with you when you were puking."

"She could have felt guilty." Cayden said weakly.

"Think about Anna and how many times she took care of you when you were sick. Zero, none. Brooke already has one up on her."

Cayden pursed her lips in thought. Anna never cared if she was sick, or tired for that matter. She was only interested in sex, now that Cayden thought about it. They never went anywhere or did anything either, just had sex. But Cayden had fallen for her in a big way, and she was scared. She felt only half the things for Anna that she felt with Brooke. "Jo, I really like Brooke, but even so, I don't want to be in a relationship."

"Cayden , you don't know what a relationship is. Learn with Brooke."

"I don't know anyone besides my parents who have been together for a long period of time... happily. Even my parents are bored. They were always bored. They moved to Vegas to have something to do besides sit and look at each other for the rest of their lives."

"Give Brooke a chance."

"I am, aren't I?"

"I don't think so." Jodie said sadly.

"We have a date Wednesday, that's a start. You'll all be there so I don't have to worry about her getting all sexy with me."

"Why would that worry you? She's hot, Cayd! Don't you want her?"

"Hell yeah! But if we have sex, its all over. Then we're connected at the vagina as one entity, and life is never the same. I'll be stupid and drippy at first, 'yes dearing' my way through life, until we get tired of each other and then we're stuck with each other because we don't know any other way."

"Jeez, Cayd, that's a hell of a prediction." Jodie snorted. "You can't be serious. Just how long do you think you can hold out?"

"There will be no sex. At least until I am totally sure she's not playing with me."

Jodie frowned. Poor Brooke.

part 21

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