DISCLAIMERS: in Part 1
Hidden Desires, Part 9
©2002 -Vertigo-
Cayden lounged around the house all morning. She loved her day off and took full advantage of it. Wade worked all weekend and their days off didn't coincide making a true alone day for Cayden. The tall woman whipped out a bag of Oreos and a tall glass of milk and plopped down on the couch in her underwear. She had the house to herself and refused to get dressed. The second that the bag of cookies crinkled, La La was at her feet, giving her the eye. She reached down and scratched the giant cat behind his ears, watching with a grin as his eyes closed and he began to purr. "You do realize that if daddy knew I really liked you, my cover would be blown?" she said in a whisper. "So don't go saying anything incriminating."
Cayden had polished off a handful of cookies and two glasses of milk and was just drifting into a nap when the doorbell rang. She scowled and glared at the door but the bell continued to chime. "It's my only day off... go away!" she yelled.
"I know that, silly. That's why I'm here."
"Jodie. Go away, and take whatever woman you have with you."
"Cayden. I'm hurt. I'm all alone." Jodie said with a pout.
The tall woman made her way to the door and looked through the peephole to find that Jodie was indeed, alone.
Jodie took one look at her friend and laughed. "Oreos huh?"
"What?" Cayden asked in confusion.
"You've got Oreo all over your teeth and there's a hole in your drawers. Good thing I didn't bring a woman with me."
Cayden ran off to the bathroom to brush her teeth.
Jodie made herself at home and started the coffee pot. By the time the tall woman came back, her friend was laying on the couch comfortably, remote in one hand, cookies in the other. "Cayd, do you mind getting me some coffee?"
The brunette scowled. "Oh absolutely master, anything else your highness?"
"Mmm... no, that will be all."
Cayden made herself some coffee too, brought both mugs into the living room, and set them down on the coffee table. "Feet please." she said, smacking Jodie's foot.
"Oh, a foot massage would be wonderful." The waitress said, wiggling her toes.
"Fuck off, Princess." Cayden smirked, throwing her friend's feet off of the couch and sitting in their place. "What brings you here on my sacred day off?"
"It's Sunday, my cable's out and I have no coffee."
"The tragedy of it all." Cayden said sarcastically. This is taking too long.. 3... 2... 1...
"So, what happened with Denise last night?"
The shopkeeper chuckled. "Like you don't already know. I bugged out of our date."
"Knew you would." Jodie said smugly.
"Shut up." Cayden blew on her coffee and refused to look at Jo.
"Cayd, it's not you. I knew that."
"Yeah, yeah." The brunette focused on the television and winced. "I am not watching cartoons Jo, gimme." she reached for the remote but Jodie moved it away. "Jodie! Gimme!"
"No. I had it first and I'm not watching home improvement shows all day either."
"You're staying all day?" Cayden whined.
"I mean, it's bad enough you're obsessed with those shows, but you do nothing with the knowledge. You'd half expect this place to look like the Taj Mahal by now."
"You're not staying all day."
"Or at least like that jungle room room that Christopher Lowell created. That would be neat. What was it... Indonesian?"
"Jodie! When are you leaving?" Cayden demanded an answer.
"I just got here." Jodie complained.
The tall woman sighed. "I liked that Indonesian room you know, but I wouldn't want to live in it."
"Speaking of Indonesian, I'm going out for Thai food with Jennifer tonight, wanna come?"
"Thai food huh? Nah, I don't want to go with you and a date. That's tacky."
"I'm not dating her, actually she's hot for you." Jodie said innocently.
Cayden sat straight up and threw her arms in the air. "NO! Oh no! No, no, no, no,.. and NO! Forget it."
"Please? She's hot. She's got blonde hair and green eyes." Jodie said with a smirk.
"I don't care if she looked like JLo. No."
"Didn't say she looked like JLo. She looks like Brooke actually." The waitress snickered.
Cayden scrunched up her face at first, but was reminded of her dream the moment Jodie mentioned Brooke's name. Her heart started beating rapidly.
"You're considering it?" Jodie asked hopefully.
"No. I'm not. I can't play games."
"What games? Just have dinner with me and a chick. No expectations. She just wants to sit next to the great and powerful Cayden."
"Ha. No, I'd rather not."
"Such a waste of damned good looks you are." Jodie sighed in defeat. "So, what are you going to do about Brooke anyway?"
Cayden shrugged. "What can I do? Nothing."
"You know her name, I'm sure there aren't many other Brooke's with her last name in the phone book."
"What do you suggest I do, stalk her?" Cayden chuckled.
"Well, no, but if I were you, I'd find her number and call her."
"What the hell would I say? Oh hi there Brooke, I've stalked you this far, wanna have lunch?"
"No, how about starting with hello."
"Dry up Jo. What I mean is, what would I possibly say after this whole boyfriend thing? I really don't want to talk to her."
"I think she has the hots for you and used you as an excuse to leave him."
"I'm not flattered. What if he was crazy?"
"Ah, but he wasn't. Angry, yes, crazy, no. He thinks you're boffing his girlfriend Cayd, you'd be pissed too. Just call her and ask her how Fred is."
"She'd think I'm crazy calling her like that! Why am I even answering you?"
"I would call." Jodie said with a shrug.
"That's you. I'll wait to see her in the shop if anything. I'm still pissed at her for using me as a scapegoat."
"Yeah, but you're still hot for her so you'll get over it." Jodie said with a smirk.
"Shut up."
*********************
Oh my God... where the hell would Grant get Cayden's name from? How did he know anything? Am I talking in my sleep? Brooke walked with Fred and panicked. Holy Jesus! I must be talking in my sleep... good Lord! How long have I been doing this? How long does he know I've been having dreams of Cayden? Brooke stopped walking and furrowed her brows. Just because I dream of someone, doesn't mean I'm having an affair. How does he even know Cayden is a real person? I know I never mentioned her before. To anyone. She glanced down at the dog. Ok, so I told Fred, but unless Fred can talk... She froze. FRED! The cologne! The bag! Grant went through my pocket book? That son of a bitch! Brooke fumed. How dare he! She bent down, bagged Fred's poop angrily and threw it into the trash can, hard. She continued to grind her teeth as she headed back to her mother's when thought occurred to her. Wait a minute, just because I scribbled her name on a paper bag doesn't mean anything. It could just be a name I liked or... oh no... maybe he put two and two together and .... Brooke's mouth went dry and she looked up the street in the direction of The Fuzzy Belly Deli. He couldn't... he's not that smart. Is he? She turned on her heel and walked as fast as she could with the old dog in the opposite direction. Oh my god. If he did I'd just die! she thought, horrified with the very prospect of Grant confronting Cayden.
********************
Cayden finally got Jodie to leave and she spent the rest of the day laying around in her holey underwear until Wade came home. He was exhausted from, he claimed, fighting off the sweaty herd of thong wielding, freebie sucking, housewives. He wanted nothing more than a hot shower and his bed. He left Cayden alone to watch Tv to her heart's content. The tall woman toasted up a grilled cheese for a late supper and pretended to hate the cat for the rest of the evening.
******************
Brooke had been sitting at her desk for hours, her work kept her busy until her stomach growled and she realized she hadn't touched the muffin she brought for breakfast. Looking at her watch she was surprised to find it after lunch time. "No wonder I'm starved." she said to herself.
"Whats that hon?" Bev asked from her cubicle.
"Nothing Bev, I'm hungry. I'm going to lunch now."
"Hey, I was just going too, wanna join me?"
Brooke shrugged. "Why not?"
They wound up at Au Bon Pain and sat down at a small table after they got their sandwiches.
"What's new? You seem extra quiet today." Bev inquired, unwrapping her lunch.
"A lot has happened this weekend, Bev."
"Wanna talk about it?"
Brooke sighed. If anyone would understand, it would be Bev, but was she really ready to talk about it yet? Screw it. "I think I'm a lesbian." She blurted out in a hushed voice.
Bev dropped her sandwich with a plop. "What?" she asked in disbelief.
Brooke turned pink and squirmed. "I have a horrible crush on a woman... and..." Someone walked by and she stopped.
"Oh Brooke, a crush is harmless. It's perfectly normal for a woman to have a crush on another woman." Bev consoled her distraught friend.
"Well, no. I think it's more than a crush." Brooke admitted shyly. "I dream about her."
Bev smiled knowingly, maternally. She felt very pleased that Brooke chose her to talk to. "Is this the first time you've spoke to someone about this?"
The blonde nodded and picked at the seeds on her sandwich roll.
"Do you feel better for it?"
"Not really, but I had to tell someone. I figured with Sam and all... you'd understand."
Bev nodded proudly. "So you dream about her do you?"
Brooke blushed harder and nodded.
"Oh honey, it's ok. There's nothing to be ashamed of."
"I don't feel ashamed. Just confused. I never felt anything for a woman before. I mean, where did it come from?"
"Who knows. But it happened. Are you sure it's not just a crush?"
"Vivid dreams Bev, even when I'm awake." Brooke said, eyes wide.
"Well then, definitely not a crush. Is she close to you? Do you see her often?"
"No. She works in a shop I went to once, then I saw her again in the park. It's not like I can have her anyway Bev, she's taken. She's so beautiful though. Sexy and tall."
"She's taken? Oh, well that sucks." Bev frowned. Brooke was definitely ga ga over this woman.
"I really wasn't planning on making anything of it anyway." Brooke said sadly.
"Even if she was single? Is she interested in you?"
Brooke perked up instantly. "I think so. I think she tried to pick me up the first time we met. Then when she looked at me in the park... god... the way she looked at me, Bev. No one's ever looked at me like that before."
Both of the older woman's eyebrows shot up. "Oh?"
"Oh, Bev, it made my knees weak." Brooke said dreamily.
"Well, look at you, honey. I believe you, this is way more than a crush. Are you sure she's taken?"
"Very sure. There was this woman hanging all over her at the park." the blonde said, crestfallen. "To make that sort of public display..."
"But, isn't that when she looked at you that way? Perhaps she isn't serious about this hanging woman. How much do you know about her anyway?"
"Not much. Hmm, maybe you're right, maybe they weren't serious. Cayden didn't seem very receptive now that I think about it, and she did look at me like she was very interested. Oh, Bev! Now you got me thinking!"
"Cayden, what a pretty name." Bev remarked.
"It suits her. She's tall, has long beautiful black shiny hair, a great body, and her skin, it looks so flawless I just want to touch it. I think I'm obsessed with her hands!" Brooke said in a frightened voice.
Bev smiled reassuringly. "It's ok, baby. I say you get to know her better. Who knows?"
Brooke sighed. "Yeah, who knows."
"What does Grant think of all this, or does he not know?"
"Please, Grant is history. He's made his bed." Brooke replied bitterly.
Bev's head cocked to the side. "What happened?"
"You wouldn't even believe it. Suffice it to say, he's gone." She said adamantly.
The older woman sat back and studied her friend. She looked very serious. "Is this because of Cayden?"
"No, it's been a long time coming. I think that Cayden was just the icing on the cake."
******************
For a Monday, Cayden was pretty busy. The Fuzzy Belly Deli had a steady stream of customers, some regular, some new, and of course, ones who drove Cayden crazy by walking all over the place, picking things up and putting them down in the wrong place. If that wasn't enough, Ida Friedman called a total of 6 times to inform Cayden of her baby's brilliant escapades, her newest incompetent psychiatrist and her homeopathic remedies for everything from plantar's warts to dandruff. By the time Jodie decided to pop in, the tall shopkeeper was a wreck and she left her friend to mind the shop as she went out to take a break. Knowing
Jodie could only stay a short while, Cayden couldn't disappear and she opted for sitting on the sidewalk a few stores down to drink a tall, cold, can of iced tea. The awning from the store she sat in front of, kept the sun from hitting her upper body, but it didn't prevent the glaring heat from attacking her long legs. She frowned as she felt herself start to burn. It wasn't only hot, it was humid too and Cayden knew that once the iced tea was gone, the thrill of her reality break would be over, so she sipped the cold liquid slowly. Just as she closed her eyes and began to relax, Jodie popped her head out of the shop with the cordless phone dangling from her fingers.
"Oh Cayden, sweetheart, darling, angel." she said, mimicking Ida Friedman.
"Nooooo...." the tall woman groaned.
"Yes, it's your biggest fan. I didn't know you were being considered for sainthood." Jodie teased.
"She has nobody. I listen to her." Cayden shrugged. "What am I supposed to do?" she asked rhetorically.
"Aren't you the bees knees, angel pie."
Cayden sighed. She really didn't feel like talking to Mrs. Friedman again, but knew if she didn't now, the eccentric old woman would only call back later. "Oh alright. Give me the phone." She reached out reluctantly, and started getting up.
Jodie watched with amusement as Cayden pressed the hold button and started nodding instantly as she walked back inside.
The tall shop keeper eventually hung up the phone and banged her head on the receiver a few times before expelling a frustrated growl. "She drives me crazy Jo!"
"Yeah, but you're going to heaven. She said so."
"Great. I'll have no fun at all."
The two friends stared out the front window blankly as the tall woman began to relax again.
*********************
Brooke was distracted for the rest of the day after she confessed to Bev. Every so often, she'd catch the older woman peeking over the cubicle with a knowing smile on her face. At first, it made Brooke blush, but after a while she started to feel relieved that she told Bev. As the day progressed, she started to feel more and more comfortable with herself and more assured about her attraction to Cayden. By the time she was ready to leave, Brooke almost had a cocky air about her.
"You have a great night, Brooke." Bev said with a wink.
"Oh I will. Trust me." The blonde replied confidently. She had been thinking of Cayden all afternoon and her predicament. She came to a decision that regardless if Cayden had a girlfriend or not, she was going to talk to her. She needed to know more about the tall woman, and if she had a girlfriend, so what. Brooke couldn't go without knowing, at least, Cayden's last name, or how old she was... little things like that drove her crazy. The problem was, as much as she needed to know, she couldn't face Cayden if Grant had gone in there and done something stupid. She volleyed between walking confidently into the Fuzzy Belly Deli and running away in the other direction. But she knew, in order to get the information she wanted, she'd have to confront Cayden in one way or another.
After a quiet dinner alone, Brooke made her final decision on what to do with Cayden. She was going to use Fred. Not the most confident approach, but Cayden seemed genuinely interested in animals and if Fred was going to be the catalyst, then so be it. Brooke was going to go into the shop and feel Cayden out. She'd know instantly if Grant was there depending on Cayden's reaction. Then she was going to make her move. She hoped and prayed that Grant hadn't confronted the tall woman. If he did, and ruined any opportunities she could possibly have at being at the very least, friends with Cayden, she'd have to kill him. Plain and simple. Grant would be toast.
************************
Jodie had left a while ago and Cayden was enoying the last hour of work. It was quiet, Christopher Lowell was in the bottom left square on Hollywood Squares, and life was good. She propped her feet up on the counter and leaned back. She couldn't wait to go home and eat dinner. She picked up the phone and called Wade's cell.
"Hi there." Wade said in a deep voice.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I was looking for my homo." Cayden teased.
Wade snickered. "Was it good? Did I sound butch?"
"You sounded like Freddy "Boom Boom" Washington."
"OOoo. Cool! What's up?"
"Pizza, how many slices?"
"Two please. I want squares, ends please, crispy but not too.."
"You're getting two slices. Period." Cayden cut him off. "I'm not driving the man crazy."
"You're such a wuss. Fine, I'll take two soggy, droopy, old slices."
"Good." Cayden stuck her tongue out at the phone and hung up. She put her feet up against the counter and stretched out her legs, pushing the chair back and laced her fingers behind her head. She smiled as she glanced at the cash register. Today was a good day, Mrs. Friedman aside. She pulled in as much money on a Monday as she would on a typical weekend. I wracked up. What do I want... let's see... She started fantasizing about a new leather jacket, a trenchcoat and maybe an awesome pair of gloves to match. She was so wrapped up in her fantasy she didn't bother reacting to the tinkling of the bell, she just swiveled back and forth, all stretched out in her chair. When she finally did look up at her customer she became so flustered , she tried to get up and take her feet off the counter at the same time. Her arms flailed wildly and her long legs splayed open clumsily as the tall woman slid out of the chair and onto the floor with a thud.
Brooke's eyes widened when Cayden began flailing, and she put her hand to her mouth and watched helplessly with a wince as the shop keeper lost her balance and fell. She blushed, embarrassed for the tall woman. She strode confidently into the Deli with a whole lot to say, but now with Cayden in such a state, she lost her tongue.
"Goddammit to hell!"
Brooke took hesitant steps towards the counter and peeked over as Cayden grumbled.
Suddenly the chair was being lifted and Cayden's nightmare was coming true. She made a complete ass of herself in front of Brooke. She really hoped Brooke would disappear but she didn't and now that those green eyes were looking at her with interested amusement, Cayden had no choice but to respond. "Hi." she squeaked out, climbing clumsily to her feet.
Brooke, although thoroughly amused, was charmed. "Hi." she replied, not quite sure what to do with her hands as she watched Cayden right the chair.
"Um... I,, uh... it's just that you.. when you came in..." Cayden stuttered, red faced and mortfied.
Brooke giggled. "I'm sorry I startled you."
"Yeah, well." The tall woman looked everywhere but at Brooke.
"Um, Fred needs a new leash!" The blonde said louder and with much more enthusiasm than she was comfortable with.
"Oh. Okay. They're over there." Cayden pointed.
Brooke went over to the selection and started touching them, not really paying attention to them at all. She desperately wanted to talk to Cayden, but after making such a grand entrance, she had no idea what to say. She felt quite smug actually, to be able to bring about that kind of reaction from the tall woman, but her empathetic nature made her feel for her too. How embarrassing. She probably wishes the floor would open up and swallow her. Maybe I should go. I'm sure I'm the last person she wants to speak to right now. Feeling suddenly awkward, the blonde turned around with an excuse on her lips about fogetting her money when Cayden's deep smooth voice cut through the silence.
"See anything you like?"
Brooke blushed instantly. Oh yes... She took a look at the shop keeper and swallowed dryly. She looks composed now. God, she's so hot, and she's looking at me, she's waiting for an answer you idiot... "Oh, no, not really. I guess I was preoccupied." Brooke admitted with a nervous titter.
"Can't imagine you'd find anything on that rack anyway."
The blonde looked puzzled as Cayden approached her. Huh?
"Those are for extra-large dogs. You want these." she pointed to another rack with much smaller merchandise.
"Oh." Brooke whispered, in embarrassment.
Cayden stepped back from the blonde and folded her arms across her chest. I wanted to see her again, but so soon? I'm still mad at her. She has some explaining to do. Why is she so calm? Why is she actually here anyway? She has to know that after she told her boyfriend we were screwing around that he'd come here and let me have it. Isn't she remorseful in the least? She should be apologizing to me, not standing around and wasting my time.
"I think I like the blue one, but I also like the zebra one." Brooke said with a smile turning to face the tall woman. "What do you think?"
Cayden shrugged, her eyes narrowed and angry.
Brooke's smile faded and her heart sped up. What the hell? She was fine just a minute ago. She turned back around, too confused to think of the obvious.
"Are you almost done, I'm about to close up."
Brooke felt like a child when she met Cayden's cool blue gaze. "Um, yeah. I'll take the zebra one." she said meekly, not knowing what she did to anger Cayden suddenly.
"Cash only, I closed out the credit card machine for the day."
What is wrong with her? Brooke fished around in her pocket book and came up with the correct change and held it out. Cayden took it away, avoiding any touching fingers and didn't even offer a bag. "Uh, yeah, thanks." Brooke said as she backed away from the counter and the angry stare she was recieving.
After the blonde left, Cayden blew out a loud breath. "I don't care how cute she is, I'm pissed off at her. Don't think I didn't notice that ass Ms Hewitt! Tight, sexy, ass that it was. Jeez, you'd think people like that would have ugly asses." Cayden's foot tapped with tension. "I can't believe she acted like nothing happened! She had to know that man came in here and threatened me. The nerve!"
Brooke walked dejectedly towards her mother's place. She was confused and sad. What happened? Why was she so mad at me? What did I do? So what, she fell on her ass... of all the nerve. She was just embarrassed that I saw her make a fool of herself and I ruined her image! I didn't do anything wrong! Oooo! She has no right to treat me like that! Brooke turned around and started marching right back to the Fuzzy Belly Deli.
Cayden was pulling down the gate when she saw the blonde heading her way, and boy was she steamed. She stood up and prepared for a confrontation.
"Just what gives you the right to treat me like that? What did I ever do to you?" Brooke asked angrily.
"Me? Hello? What did I ever do to you?"Cayden countered.
"Excuse me?" Brooke asked, louder this time.
"I said, What did I ever do to you?" Cayden yelled. "What nerve you have sending your boyfriend to my store to threaten me. You could have used anybody you wanted instead you had to go on and make up some fantasy fuck fest between us just to tick him off!"
Brooke paled and backed away.
Cayden pulled down the gate the rest of the way with a loud bang. "And you don't even apologize! You come in, scare me half to death so I almost break my neck and dawdle over leashes that you're going to put on a dog that can hardly walk anyway. What exactly do you want with me, Brooke?"
"Grant... came here?" Brooke squeaked out.
Cayden made a conscious effort to lower her voice. "Yes, as if you didn't think that telling him a story about us..."
"I never told him anything!" Brooke interjected..
"Bullshit." Cayden said with a snort.
"No, I didn't! I swear!" The blonde stomped her foot adamantly.
Glancing at the smaller woman gave Cayden second thoughts. She looked horrified. "Oh please, if you didn't tell him anything, where would he get that idea?" The tall woman asked, wondering if perhaps Brooke wasn't telling the truth.
Brooke began to blush furiously and looked like she may begin hyperventilating. "I can't... I don't know where he would get that idea."
Cayden raised an eyebrow. "Oh come on now."
"No, really... I... "
Dark eyebrows furrowed. "Brooke, now be real. If you didn't tell him anything, where would he get the idea that I, in particular, corruptued you into a life of lesbianism."
"Oh god... he said that?" Brooke squeaked.
"Something of the sort. Now look, I'm pretty pissed that you used me as an excuse, so if you just admit that you did it we can go on."
"But I didn't." Brooke was near tears.
"Whatever." Cayden said and started walking away.
"Damn it." Brooke cursed and kicked the gate. "Well, that went well."