Chapter 12
It was coming up to 4am; JJ had just checked her luggage into the Virgin Airlines desk. After booking her seat she went in search of a place to exchange her money, she had no idea how much money she’d need. After a short search she found one, the clerk behind the desk asked her what she wanted.
“To be honest I have no idea. I’m off to England, but I’m not sure how much I’ll need. It’s kind of a last minute journey.” JJ told the bank clerk.
“Does your bank card have maestro or cirrus on it?” inquired the guy.
“Yeah, Why?” replied JJ.
“Well you can use the card in ATMs in the UK. I assume you have a credit card as well?” he looked at JJ as she nodded in reply, “well I would suggest taking about $100 worth of notes and then find an ATM when you arrive at your destination. As a back up, you can use your credit cards but I can do cash as well.”
“No the ATM sounds good to me,” replied JJ, “So how many pounds will a hundred bucks get me?”
The clerk did a quick calculation. “It works out at about Ł65.00.”
After performing the transaction, JJ found herself seated in the quiet airport terminal, she took a moment to look at the money she had received. The money was colourful, the biggest note was a Ł20 and purple in colour, the Ł10 was smaller and orange and the Ł5 was green. They looked cute. She’d opted for a variety of different bills so she could put them in various places upon her body, better to be safe than sorry in her mind.
It was very early in the morning and the airport was understandably empty. JJ had decided to take the earliest available flight for two reasons – one it had turned out the cheapest option and two she had to get out of the house as Sarah had gone crazy when she’d told her she was going on vacation alone. She sat contemplating the few hours she’d spent at home packing.
Sarah had arrived home from her parents to find JJ packing her bags.
“Where are you going? You only just arrived home, I thought you were spending your vacation painting the bathroom?”
“I need my space Sarah! I need to think things through. I want some time alone. We need some space.” JJ said this slowly summoning up the courage to face Sarah and as she did so she continued her task of packing her case.
“So where you going? Up to the house in New Hampshire?” Sarah asked, knowing that JJ’s best friend had a vacation house up in Warren, New Hampshire. She’d often asked the couple if they’d wanted to use it but they’d never found a week that coordinated with the weeks that the house was empty.
JJ had a sudden panic; she really didn’t want to get into a conversation about Cory and England. She hesitated, at the same time as Sarah’s eyes fell on JJ’s passport lying on the bed next to her wallet.
“So, unless they have changed the rules on state to state travel, I’m guessing you’re going abroad?” Sarah said staring straight into JJ’s eyes.
“Err… yeah. I decided to go and see what England is like.” mumbled JJ, wincing as she spotted the anger in Sarah’s eyes.
“You’re going to fucking England! Don’t you think that’s a bit drastic? What happened to talking things through? Where you going to stay? Who you going to stay with? What about money?” Sarah was waving her arms and advancing at JJ.
“Sarah calm down, Jesus I’m taking a holiday on my own it’s not a crime. I have tried talking to you but you tend not to listen or want things your way or no way. I’m going to stay with a friend.” JJ continued to pack her clothes as she said this, wincing again as she felt Sarah behind her.
“What friend? Oh wait a minute not that girl you’ve been emailing. You said it was just a friendship, I knew something was going on when she sent that card to you.” Sarah slammed her hand onto JJ’s case.
JJ slowly turned round to face Sarah, her heart beating faster as she saw the pain in Sarah’s eyes. “Sarah I said it when you asked before and I’m saying it again, there is nothing going on between Cory and I, we’re friends, she’s helped me realize that maybe I want more out of life, she listens when I talk to her and she’s my friend. Besides I told you she’s married. The card was a thank you card for sending her a birthday card.” She turned back to her case, she hadn’t lied, there was nothing going on between Cory and her, unless her dreams counted.
“Remind me how you two met again?” Sarah asked nastily.
“Jesus Sarah, how many times do I need to explain this to you. I told you we were on a mailing list, they had a role-playing session and we got teamed up together, we share the same interests and she listens to me, end of story. I am allowed to have friends, this is supposed to be a relationship not a fucking prison sentence.” JJ slammed the lid of her case shut as she said the last word.
“So what happens between us?” Sarah asked.
“I just figured with us having so many problems and not trying to get solutions we should be apart for a while, maybe we can get some kind of solution if we have time to think on our own, I won't be gone that long. I think we take this week to think. I mean really think, look at what has happened between us over the past 6 years and look at what the future holds. I think the spark has died Sarah and to be honest I don’t think I love you anymore.” JJ couldn’t look Sarah in the eyes, she knew she was breaking her heart but she’d really tried to make it work but Sarah wasn’t the one and she finally knew it.
At these words Sarah sank to the floor crying, “JJ you know I don't like being by myself in the house.”
JJ felt frustrated, this was the last thing she’d expected, “Well then stay at your parents, you are there enough anyways or have somebody stay in the guest room. I don't care figure it out for yourself for once!” JJ didn’t know what to do, heart to hearts weren’t her strong point and she tended to become sarcastic and even mean when her defenses were rattled. She wasn’t the emotional type but for the sake of Sarah she knelt down and hugged Sarah to her. “I’m sorry, so sorry. Remember, use this time to think, please, we’ll talk when I get back, I promise and I’ll call when I get there.” She gently placed a kiss on Sarah’s head and gathered her things and left the house, silent tears tracking down her face.
On her way out of the shop she stopped at the departures television and found her gate had been announced. She set off through the x-ray machine and to her gate and maybe her destiny. She arrived in plenty of time, there were a few other people sitting looking just as bored and she tried to work out if they were British or American. Some people were easier to place than others especially as they spoke; it sort of gave the game away.
She hated flying, detested it. She had flown quite a lot in the past. When she’d lived with Tina in Germany she’d flown home a few times and she’d taken a few internal flights but if it was possible to get places by car she took that option. Her stomach felt nauseous and she regretted the bagel.
It wasn’t long before they were boarding the plane, first class and advantage flyers first and then slowly by seat number. She was in seat 21a, a window seat, at least she could watch the world go by and if she was tired she had the wall of the plane to lean against. She just hated the confined space and the lack of leg room, if she were to admit it, she was slightly claustrophobic as well but flying was a means to an end and the only way to meet Cory, so she’d have to do it.
Her seating row was called and she proceeded to the gate, she handed her boarding pass to the flight attendant and took it back after he’d scanned it. She headed down the tunnel onto the plane. JJ nodded at the flight attendant and waited patiently as passengers put their bags and cases in the overhead compartments. She personally preferred to put hers down by her feet so she had easy access to it on the flight.
She settled into her seat, putting the pillow and blanket under her arm and taking her sweater out of her bag. At that moment, the passenger who would be beside her through the flight came to sit down; there was a little bit of rearranging done and the odd smile and then silence. JJ opened her knapsack and took out her CD player and magazines and then settled back to listen to the instructions given by the flight attendants. These seemed to go on forever. She didn’t really see the point of these, to be honest, if something happened on the plane the chances of survival were minimal but just in case she watched them strap on the life vest.
The captain then announced that the flight would last about 6 hours, conditions being okay and that the in flight entertainment would be on soon.
They taxied out onto the runway and JJ’s heart began to race, she hated the take off. She put her earphones on, closed her eyes and gripped the armrest. The words of Melissa Etheridge going round and round in her mind. “Please baby can’t you see I’m trying to explain, I’ve been there before and I’m locking the door and I’m not coming back again…” The noise of the engines drowned out the sound of the song and JJ knew take off was imminent, she gripped the rest harder and found herself holding her breath as the plane began it’s race down the runway. As the plane lifted off, JJ sent out a silent prayer to whoever was listening and focused solely on the song in her head. “You’re the only one, the only one….” This song was the song she had put on the CD for Cory and was a song that summed up her feelings for Cory.
As the plane leveled off, so did JJ’s heart rate and she began to settle into her seat. She fiddled with the remote control for the tiny TV screen in front of her seat and flicked through the movies listed in the flight leaflet, there was nothing really she wanted to watch or hadn’t already seen so she decided to get some shut eye and at least try and look human when she met Cory.
Sleep was hard to find, JJ was exhausted, she’d spent the late evening at Nancy’s house telling her about her fight with Sarah, she’d told Nancy about her impending trip to England but hadn’t expanded on the reasons except she needed space from Sarah. She tried to sleep for a few hours but when sleep wasn’t on the agenda she’d decided a walk on the beach would help clear her head and then she’d driven to the airport. Images of Sarah crying, uncertainty about Cory’s feelings and the general noise on the plane interrupted JJ’s thoughts and any hope of sleep was futile. Her head seemed to be warring with her heart, her mind kept telling her she was being foolish leaving behind a woman who obviously in her own way loved her and traveling 3000 miles to meet a woman she dreamed of but who was married.
She thought about Sarah and the last look she’d seen on Sarah’s tearstained face, a look of betrayal. JJ had known when she met Sarah that she wasn’t the love of her life but Sarah had offered her love that was safe and after Tina had left her for a guy, she’d built a wall around her heart. She’d vowed never to fall in love again and here she was taking the same path, falling in love with someone who was married to a guy; would she ever learn. JJ knew being with Sarah would keep her heart protected and the pain away and she also knew it was wrong and unfair to Sarah, but over the years, she had grown to care deeply for Sarah, but they’d had problems. If JJ said one thing Sarah wanted something else, they could never agree even down to TV shows, night after night they watched their own shows, one of them in the living room, the other in the bedroom but rarely together. JJ liked computers and Sarah detested them and begrudged JJ wanting to be on the thing. They were just incompatible and as time had gone on, the differences became more pronounced, this extended to the bedroom. JJ enjoyed sex, she thrived on it and liked to think she was adventurous but Sarah only wanted sex on her terms and JJ had slowly become frustrated and finally taken matters into her own hands.
JJ glanced out of the window, there was nothing to see, she thought about all the reasons to stay with Sarah, besides the security of a home there was nothing there, she thought of Cory and knew that if there was even the slightest bit of interest on Cory’s side, she would give up her heart, so long as it was what Cory wanted. This brought doubts into JJ’s mind. Would Cory leave Sam for her? Where would they live? There were 3000 miles between them and two different cultures and countries. For god’s sake JJ what are you thinking? She banged her head against the side of the plane and continued to stare into the darkness of night.
The flight attendant interrupted her musing; asking if she wanted a drink and JJ decided a beer might settle her down and make her sleepy. She sipped the beer slowly and began to flick through the magazine.
The beer obviously worked as she awoke feeling groggy and unaware of her surroundings, she flinched as she felt a hand touch her shoulder and she turned to see whose it was.
“You okay dear?” the older lady seated next to her asked removing her hand as she saw JJ’s eyes narrow. “You were jerking in your sleep and your hand almost knocked your glass over. I hope you don’t mind me asking, but I noticed you were a bit scared earlier on and wanted to check you were doing okay.”
JJ wiped her eyes and shook her head trying to get rid of the foggy feeling she felt, “Sorry about that, I tend to get quite active in my sleep, not exactly the ideal place for that!”
“I gather you don’t like flying then dear?” the old lady asked.
“Just the take off, I mean I guess when your time is up your time is up, but what worries me is what if your time isn’t up but the person seated next to you or two seats back time is up. It’s not like you can leave the plane or move away. Is it? She smiled and reached across the seats holding her hand towards the lady. “My name’s JJ, what’s yours?”
“Mary. An interesting theory, one I hope I never get to see proved!” she shook JJ’s hand. “So is this your first trip to England?” she asked, passing a sweet to JJ who shook her head at the offer.
“Yeah, never been there before and you?”
“Oh yes I was born there but married an American after the war, my family still live over there and unfortunately my mother is poorly, so I’m going to stay with my sister and help out.” the woman replied, her face taking on a sadder appearance.
“I’m sorry to hear that, nothing serious I hope.” JJ took a sip of her drink to try and freshen the taste in her mouth and turned to face the lady better.
“I’m afraid it isn’t good news, but she’s old, in her eighties and has been poorly on and off for a while. She may pull through you just don’t know, she’s a fighter.”
JJ didn’t know what to say, she felt like she’d put her foot in her mouth and she looked down at the drink in her hand. Mary leaned over and patted her arm, “There’s no need to feel embarrassed dear, I like talking to people and I know you think you’ve said the wrong thing but really dear it’s okay. So how about you, business or pleasure trip?”
“Pleasure.” JJ smiled as images of Cory floated through her head. “I’m meeting a friend, she lives in the Midlands.”
“Not far from my family. So have you known her long?”
“Well I’ve never actually met her, we met online through an emailing list, but we’ve become good friends.” JJ finished there; she didn’t need to go into the details of her life with a stranger.
“That’s brave, you hear so many stories about people meeting through the Internet, unfortunately not all nice but I’m sure you and your friend will get on well.” Mary picked up her book signaling that their little chat was over. JJ let out a little sigh of relief; small talk was never her forte. She then settled back and closed her eyes.
It didn’t take long for her to be fast asleep.
A few hours later she woke with a jerk to find a meal being placed in front of her. She coughed, readjusted her seat and looked out of the window, daylight was streaming through and there were a few clouds in the sky. She checked the monitor in front of her and realised she had just over an hour before the plane landed. She ate her food slowly, plane food was never the tastiest but a few crackers and a chocolate brownie seemed to go down well. She made small talk with Mary asking her about her family and then felt the need to stretch her legs and pay a visit to the restroom.
On her return she climbed back into her seat awkwardly and look at the flight map on the screen. They were just reaching the coast of England. She felt her stomach begin to churn; this was it, no turning back. In just over an hour, she’d be meeting the woman she felt was the one, the only one, for her. She closed her eyes and an image of Cory’s recent photo began to appear in her head, she was cute; she looked like she had green eyes. Cory had said they were green but sometimes in the odd picture they looked grey. Her mind had often wandered to this meeting. What should she do, appear cool and aloof or shake her hand, maybe hug her, definitely no kissing. This thought brought a smile to JJ’s face and she felt her pulse quicken. If this is what one thought did to JJ what would meeting the real person do, she just hoped she wouldn’t faint.
Sam turned the car into the pick up lane of the arrivals terminal. He pulled up to the kerb and turned to face Cory, “You run in, we’re slightly late, that accident and tail back held us up, she shouldn’t be long and I’ll circle round the building.”
Cory said a silent thank you to whoever had listened to her wishes; she had desperately wanted her first meeting with JJ to be a private affair between the two of them. She opened the car door and proceeded through the entrance of the terminal. The airport was humming with activity, she glanced up at the arrivals monitor and saw JJ’s flight number; the plane had landed. She was actually here; Cory felt a wave of nervous nausea pass over her. She had no idea what to say to her, how to greet her. She looked towards the arrivals exit. She figured it would take about 30 minutes for JJ to clear passport control and collect her baggage. She went to stand with the growing crowd all waiting to welcome some weary traveler to the country.
The plane had landed smoothly, and JJ had actually enjoyed it, the sky outside was dark. Somewhere over the Ocean there had been daylight but with the difference in time she had now entered evening time again. It felt weird to have missed a day but she’d gain the time back on the return flight. The seatbelt sign was still on so she made sure she had her bag on her lap ready for a quick exit, there was no need to stay on the plane longer than she needed to.
As the seat belt light was turned off, there was a sudden flurry of movement and commotion, like the start of a running race as passengers shot out of their seats and tried to empty the overhead compartments in a frantic effort to escape the plane and be the first off. JJ fell back into her seat; there was no way she was going to get through the crowd of bodies. She smiled at Mary as they watched two passengers trying to get luggage out of opposite compartments and hitting each other accidentally in the process. Some people’s manners had disappeared altogether.
After a 5 minute wait the aisle had cleared and JJ helped Mary out of her seat, she noticed for the first time the walking stick and offered to carry Mary’s bag as they headed down the gangway and onto solid ground. They walked slowly and headed towards passport control, there they separated as Mary headed to the UK and European Union line, JJ hadn’t attempted to make conversation on the way down, she couldn’t, her stomach had twisted into a million knots and her hands were extremely clammy.
The passport officer seemed to ask her a hundred pointless questions, she was close to being sarcastic and telling him her vital statistics but she decided to play it cool. There was no need to lose her patience and end up in customs having a body search because he wanted revenge, so she sucked it up and flashed him a toothy smile. As he stamped her passport and literally threw it in her direction she said in her strongest American, “Have a nice day.” This comment earned her a scowl.
She waited for Mary to finish at her desk and they proceeded to the baggage claim.
“I thought the guy was never going to let me go. He asked me loads of questions, anybody would think I was a criminal!” JJ was still riled about the many questions.
“It’s nothing personal dear, they do it to everyone. They’re even harder on us ex patriots, like we’re crazy because we left the homeland. So, is your friend meeting you at the gate or are you staying down here tonight?” Mary asked trying to cheer up her tired and obviously nervous traveling partner.
“She should be at the gate. She said she’d be there, I mean I hope she is there as I have no idea what I’m going to do if she isn’t. Sorry, I think I’m more nervous than I thought I would be, I’m babbling.” JJ glanced at Mary who had a smile on her face.
“I’m sure she’ll be there and I hope you have a good week together. I need a trolley to put my case on. How about you?” Mary asked as she pointed at the row of trolleys neatly parked at the edge of the baggage area.
“No my case is small and on wheels but I’ll get it for you, you wait near the carousel.” JJ said as she headed towards the trolley park.
It didn’t take long before luggage cases of every shape and form came out, after a short wait, JJ spotted hers, she grabbed it off the carousel and checked the label to make sure. She continued to wait with Mary and helped her lift two cases onto the trolley.
Then they began the walk through the ‘Nothing To Declare’ door of customs and handed in their customs form.
As she turned the corner she turned to say goodbye to Mary and at that moment her eyes met Cory’s, it had to be Cory, the girl had blonde hair and looked like the photos she had sent; JJ winked at her, then she thanked Mary and headed over to the diminutive blonde who was grinning and heading towards her.
She stopped in front of Cory and had no idea what to say; for once in her life she was speechless.
“Hi JJ, how was the flight?” Cory’s heart was beating double time, she knew her hands were shaking but she had to do something as the tall woman in front of her had frozen.
“It was okay, long, boring but smooth, so no complaints.” JJ had no idea what to do, she held her right hand out to shake Cory’s at the same time as Cory stepped towards her and they ended up in an awkward hug.
Cory wrapped her arms around JJ, one arm around the top of her shoulder and the other around her waist and pulled JJ towards her into a more comfortable hold. “Welcome to England JJ, I’ve been looking forward to this.” She gave JJ a squeeze and then let go.
JJ’s heart seemed to have stopped beating and she had to remind herself to breath. Her body was on fire, she could feel Cory’s hand on her waist and it seemed to be burning a hole in her side. She heard the words but they made no sense, all she knew was this person felt wonderful in her arms and she didn’t want to let go. She felt Cory pull away and she thought about resisting but then she realized where they were and who they were and she reluctantly released her.
“Hi yourself. Sorry about that, I guess I was more nervous than I had thought. So how you doing?” JJ asked, giving the blonde a thorough look and a killer smile.
Cory felt as if the bright blue eyes were burning a hole in her face, the look was intense and she felt herself swallow slowly as she tried to think of something to say, the person in front of her was beautiful, drop dead gorgeous beautiful and she knew she was in trouble.