June -
A few days later, Jaxon placed several calls to her closet friends. If her plan was to work she would need more manpower than herself and Donny.
Darlene Walters sat on the couch breastfeeding her youngest, while her partner Amelia O'Gieblyn idly played with their son's small foot. "It doesn't make sense. Something else is going on." Her down-to-earth tone calmed Jaxon, whose pacing was causing them to get seasick.
A short time after Jaxon hung up the phone, the doorbell rang announcing the arrival of the rest of her friends. Within moments all of her best friends sat around her living room, except Matt. He was lean and wiry, more than six feet tall with curly red hair; he was leaning against the wall. Jaxon told them as quickly as possible what had happened in the last few months. From the fire where she thought about taking her life, to Rayven's voice bringing her back, Jim Gilmore and his assault on her. How she had stepped down as Chief of Blue Mountain Smoke's and Jaden's promotion. Seeing Rayven, after all these years, in the hospital room keeping watch over her son, and most importantly her desire to build a relationship with her soul mate once again.
Grabbing a six-pack of beer from the refrigerator and a Caffeine Free Diet Pepsi for Darlene, Matt took a seat across from Jaxon, who had finally been convinced to sit down. "What do you think Darlene?"
Darlene's big hazel eyes widened and Jaxon remembered how she used to give that dubious look to her team members. "It's simple, really. We have a mystery to solve."
"Mystery?" Hailey asked, shaking her blond hair.
Darlene continued, "Why did Rayven come back? Where is her husband? If she has one, why did he not come with her? Is she running away from something or toward something?"
"Jeez." Amelia stood when Darlene drew back from nursing their son. Amelia gently picked the infant up to burp him. She eased Tommy against her shoulder. Rubbing his small back gently, she said, "Why is Gilmore after Jaxon?"
"I'll run a check on Gilmore through the police computers, tomorrow." Deputy Emily McRoberts said as she took a sip of her beer and stretched her long legs out in front of her, while placing her arm around her partner Hailey Phillips. "If he has a record, I'll find it."
Jaxon buried her head in her hands. "I can't believe this. After all these years the only woman I've ever loved has come back to Silver Lake. I've got to have her in my life. I. . . can't live without my wife anymore."
"Jaxon, don't go emotional on us now," Hailey said gently. "You've got to keep a level head and we've got to think this through and come up with a plan of action."
"What do you want to do?" Matt asked.
Raising her head, Jaxon reached into her pocket and showed them the ad she'd cut from the newspaper. "I want to apply for this job and move Donny and me in with Rayven. That will give me time to show her that I've never stopped loving her. It will also allow me to be close to her when the baby comes. I can't and won't leave her up there all alone." Determination showed clearly in her blue eyes.
The always-levelheaded Jaden spoke up, "What if she has a husband?"
"I already told you, Jaden, once before," Jaxon was really getting tired of Jaden's question concerning Rayven's so called husband. "I won't break up her marriage but I don't feel she is married - unless Rayven has really changed in the past eight years. I have to be a part of her life. If friendship is all I can have than so be it, but I have to be a part of her life." 'Please, please don't be married.' the thought kept repeating over in her mind.
Darlene had taken a seat at the kitchen table with a pad and pencil she'd grabbed from a nearby drawer. "Let's make a list of what has to be done."
Amelia bent to put a sleeping Tommy into his carrier. Then she stepped up behind her partner, laying her hands gently on Darlene's shoulders. "I'm assuming you want to let your apartment go, Jaxon?"
"You know, I always wondered why you didn't buy a house." Matt interrupted. "You were waiting for Rayven to come back home, weren't you?" he asked gently.
There was a brief silence. Then Jaxon looked up into her friend's eyes and softly said, "She's my life. There is no house to call home without her in it." Silent tears fell from her eyes.
Breaking the uneasy silence that followed Jaxon's answer, Jaden said, "Well let's change your life, my friend."
Jaxon smiled, thankful for the closeness of her friends and thankful that she opened up enough to share her thoughts and feelings with them. The next few hours were spent making calls and completing arrangements for moving Jaxx to the ranch.
<<<
At precisely 6:45 in the morning, a lone figure stood on the corner using the only pay phone in Silver Lake. "I understand you wanted to talk to me?"
"I might," the governor acknowledged.
"Might?"
"And might not. It depends."
"On what?"
"What you want. What I've got. Who are you? Who am I? Because nothing is as it seems," the governor rattled off the familiar script until he was sure the agents listening had gone back to their card game, assuming he was crazy and babbling again. Fools, they all were.
"Where would you like to start?" Lois asked easily. She smiled at use of the code words that meant nothing to the normal person but gave her an amazing amount of details.
"I always start at the end," the governor retorted tersely. "It's much easier to predict the future that way."
"And you foresee the future?"
"Of course I do."
"I see."
"No, you don't see. I do," the governor corrected her, slapping his hand loudly upon the hardwood desktop in his office. "If you did, you wouldn't ask me these stupid questions repeatedly."
Lois' eyes rolled while she waited to finish the silly but profitable game between them. It amused her that not once, in the last five years, had the governor ever been questioned about the same repeated script that was used every month. "In that case, what do I want?"
"Rich, masculine willow-bark tea."
<<<
Logic told Jaxon that her ex-lover probably wanted nothing to do with her. She hurt her badly once before but the ex-firefighter was determined to be a part of Rayven's life. Approaching the farmhouse, a week later, she spotted Rayven fixing the rickety wooden gate. She noticed a jar of sun tea steeping on the windowsill, and a pair of mud-caked boots sitting outside the front door to dry. Jaxon hoped her soul mate wasn't working too hard. As she gazed upon her wife she didn't think the journalist gained so much as a pound since they parted; the real change in the small body before her had come as a result of being pregnant. There was softness to the blond, a slight rounding of her abdomen, the only sign of her being pregnant.
"Here," Jaxon said as she walked up beside her. "Let me help with that."
Jaxx stood there without moving, her work-hardened body and beautiful smile nearly tore Rayven loose from her surroundings and flung her back to a time when that body, that magnificent . . . sensual body, was hers to touch and caress. When she cared. Rayven took a step away. "Thanks, but I can manage."
"Come on, Rayven." Jaxon reached for the hammer. "Please." Rayven lifted her chin in a stubborn gesture that the firefighter remembered all too well. She almost laughed aloud. Instead, she said, "You hold, I hammer." she said, gesturing to the piece of wood in the small woman's other hand.
Willing herself to return Jaxx's gaze, she concentrated on her own breathing bringing it back under control. Jaxon meant nothing to her and hadn't for more than eight years. It shouldn't be so hard to remember that. Yeah, right. The blond hesitated a moment longer, even while her expression began to soften somewhat, maybe at the use of the word please, and handed the taller woman the hammer.
"Thanks," Jaxon took the hammer. Rayven's fingers, warm and soft, touched hers, and her heart did a flip. Swallowing hard, she reached for the first board. They worked together quietly for a few minutes fixing the hinges and replacing a couple of broken boards. "There," she said, stepping back from the gate to see if it would swing shut on its own. "I believe we fixed it."
The journalist wasn't sure what to say next. She'd wished she wasn't so dirty and sweaty. Had she brushed her teeth? Did her breath stink? More than that, she wished it didn't matter to her what she looked like. "Thanks," Rayven retrieved the hammer, the ghost of a smile nipping at the corners of her mouth. "So, what are you doing here and how is Donny?" Her wife was here facing her. Despite the years and distance between them, the reality of her, the power of her, the smell of her, wouldn't stop. But she should be used to that, shouldn't she?
"Donny is fine. He said you called him."
"Actually he called me first since I didn't have your number." They could carry on a civilized conversation. It might take effort, but they would do it. "He's a sweet boy. He has a lot of you in him."
Jaxon blinked slowly, the movement hitting the blond somewhere deep and unwanted. "He needs space," Jaxx responded, feeling her way past memories of their years together, buried years. "He'd rather be outside no matter what the weather. And he'd rather die than sit still."
"And?" Even through she adored Donny it was hard to discuss him without thinking about Jaxx's betrayal.
"I thought I would come and see how you're doing."
"I'm fine." Laying the hammer down on the front steps, Rayven sat down.
"Have you decided what your plans are?"
When Jaxx rubbed her neck, she invited the fire fighter inside. "Yes. I've decided to stay, at least for a while. Come inside and I'll fix some tea. It should be ready by now," she said as she wiped the perspiration from her forehead, then stood and turned before walking into the house.
Jaxon stepped inside and followed her through the entryway and into the kitchen. "Rayven," she said, "Donny said you were here by yourself."
"That's right," she replied, without breaking stride. Jaxx was breathing in that easy way of hers, a cadence that changed only when they were making love. Had made love. Had. Fighting free of thoughts she'd spent the past eight years exorcising, she motioned for the taller woman to sit down. She experienced a flash of resentment, and pain. "Have a seat, Jaxon." Rayven knew her words sounded stiff as she walked into the kitchen. A short time later she came back carrying two frosted glasses of iced tea.
Jaxon caught the slight tightening of Rayven's features. Even after all these years she could still remember her look of pleasure, smell her scent and feel her soft moist skin beneath her fingertips and tongue, the silky blond hair that the fire fighter loved to bury her face in and run her fingers through. "Where's the baby's father?"
The journalist opened her mouth but slowly closed it without saying a word. The mouth she'd once claimed for herself looked tight. Small hands lay on Rayven's thighs, the tips pressing into the flesh beneath her jeans. Jaxx might not know her wife's thoughts but she could still read the smaller woman's body language. She was under control, barely.
Rayven stopped and looked at her blue-eyed friend, her brow furrowed in an expression of total disbelief. "Do you really think that you, of all people, have the right to ask me that?"
Yes. No. Yes. No. She had no rights at all where Rayven was concerned. Yet it didn't stop her from believing she did or from dreaming and thinking about the smaller woman, of wanting to know what she'd done with her life or who she'd become. She's my wife, damit. I should have rights but I gave those rights away when I had sex with Tom. Sighing heavily, Jaxon resigned herself to No; she didn't have any rights, yet. "You're right, I guess I don't," she finally said. "It's none of my business."
Unexpectedly the journalist heart went out to the firefighter. No matter how much her wife shuttered her feelings inside her, she couldn't completely disguise her body language. For several moments Rayven remained silent, not sure what to think or say. Then she gave in, "Jaxon you don't have to worry about me." Her voice had lost its angry edge, and Jaxx turned to look at her. It was almost her undoing.
Jaxon also felt the pull of the smaller woman, of the shiny green eyes that held so much mystery and the soft full lips she could still feel, as they moved over her body, if she closed her eyes she could remember their sweet taste. Her body jerked as she remembered tasting herself on those soft lips. No, she didn't have any rights. However, she'd learned how to listen and more times than not, that ability made it possible for her to hear things left unsaidÖlike the tension and doubt, even fear in Rayven's voice, like the need for them to be together after all these years. "Rayven," she took a step towards the blond, but stopped short of touching her, "can we talk?"
Silence.
Jaxon closed the distance between them. "I need to talk to you, please."
"Jaxon" Rayven whimpered. "Don't."
"Please, Rayven." She reached out and brushed a smudge of dirt from the beautiful woman's cheek, marveling at the feel of warm skin against her fingertips. It was as soft and smooth as she remembered. "I simply want to talk."
Rayven took a step back, away from the outstretched hand. "All right," she said without enthusiasm, and ran one hand idly through the blond mass of hair that now fell loosely around her face. 'Oh, Gods, this is harder than I thought it would be.'
The familiar gesture caused Jaxon's heart to tremble. Rayven had always done that when she was nervous and hiding something. I wonder what your hiding, sweetheart? thought the firefighter.
Jaxon needed to apologize to Rayven for hurting her eight years ago and she wanted to be friends again, to laugh and remember old times as well as have the chance to build a future with her. To be forgiven for hurting her, instead she said. "I'm sorry about your mom."
Rayven acknowledged her condolences with a nod and a whispered, "Thank you." After a pause she continued, "So what are you doing here, Jaxon?"
"I came here because I want to help," she said with a smile. "This is a big ranch, and I know it can't be easy trying to run it alone."
"I'll be fine."
From the dark haired woman's shirt pocket she withdrew a piece of wrinkled paper. "Not according to this." It was the ad Rayven had placed in the newspaper.
"So?"
"So I'm applying for the job."
Jaxon answer had been so matter-of-fact that for several seconds, Rayven hadn't registered the seriousness of what the firefighter had said. "Thank you for the offer, but I need someone full-time and you already have a job."
"I quit."
"You quit?" Rayven couldn't believe what she was hearing. "You quit being chief of the Blue Mountain Smokies? A position you dreamed of all your life? Why?"
"My goals in life have changed."
"I'm sorry Jaxon, but I can not accept your offer. I assure you I'll be fine."
"I'm offering you one summer or until your hus . . . husband arrives." Jaxon stumbled over the word husband.
Refuse her offer, her common sense demanded. Rayven knew she shouldn't accept yet she also didn't want to be on the ranch alone when the baby was born. She was scared and she knew it. There was a part of her that wanted to forgive and forget the past and start new, and a part of her that didn't. It was safer that way, but also, extremely lonely. If she were to forgive, Jaxon, where did it go from there? Could there ever be more? Did Jaxon just want to be friends? The answers weren't coming, but one thing she did know the answer to and that was she didn't want to have the baby alone. "Okay, Jaxon, you win. You've got the job."
When the ex-firefighter rose and crossed to her and gently took her hands, the look in the sky blue eyes almost made Rayven believe they could make it work between them. If Jaxon did still care, maybe there was a chance.
She wanted to hug Rayven, but instead, she merely said, "Thank you. Donny and I will move our things over tomorrow and get set up." She squeezed the small hands gently.
The simple gesture rocked Rayven. It felt too much like old times, when their every move was in perfect harmony. With all the strength she could muster she said, "tomorrow?"
"Of course. The ad did say room and board. You can show us our rooms tomorrow. I better get started packing. We'll be seeing you tomorrow, hon." Then she left quickly, before Rayven could respond, leaving the room unbearably empty.
"Oh Gods, what did I just agree to?" Rayven asked unbelievably. "My intelligence shrinks as I expand." she said, patting her swollen stomach gently. "Great, just great." Shaking her head disgusted with herself, she walked through the house to the back yard to begin working on her garden.
< < <
The next morning, four pickup trucks and two trailers loaded with stuff came down the long drive. The first one contained Jaxon and Donny; the others Rayven didn't recognize.
They stopped in front of the house and Donny jumped out, coming up to give her a hug. "We get to live here with you," he said excitedly.
"That's right, honey, you sure do." She ruffled his hair and gave him a one-arm hug in return. Never taking her eyes off of Jaxon until the woman from the second vehicle opened the door and got out. She was tall, if not taller than the fire fighter. It hit her suddenly and with stunning force, she felt jealousy build inside her as she watched the interaction between Jaxx and the red head. What the hell was wrong with her? She had no claim on her ex-lover so why was she having these feelings? Damn, you don't ever learn?
"Rayven, I like you to meet Deputy Emily McRoberts. Emily, this is Rayven McEllis, my new boss."
She jerked, startled from her thoughts. Emily stood there, looking beautiful and sophisticated, a warm smile on her face. "Hi, it's nice to meet you," she said, shaking Rayven's hand.
"Welcome to my home, Emily."
"And I'd like you to meet Jaden Brooks, the new Chief of Blue Mountain Smokies, his partner Matt Adams, Darlene Walters and her partner Amelia O'Gieblyn, owners of Herbs America."
"Hi, it's nice to meet all of you."
Jaxon broke the uneasiness by saying, "Emily, let's get your truck unloaded first so you can be on your way. I know you don't want to miss your appointment."
"You got it, beautiful," she responded as she walked to her pickup and let the tailgate down.
"Jaxon?"
"Not to worry, Rayven. Everything is taken care of." she said over her shoulder as she went to help Emily and the others.
<<<
"You said she was beautiful, but you never said she was a goddess. She's gorgeous," Emily stated as they spoke quietly at the back of the truck.
"She's more beautiful today than when we were kids. I can't lose her again, Emily. I'd die."
"You know Hailey and I are here for you, we hope you and Rayven get back together. Maybe a little jealously won't hurt," she said smiling.
Laughing softly, Jaxon said, "Maybe, but not too much. If Rayven is anything like she used to be, she can be one evil green eyed monster."
"Okay, just a little. Let's go. I think I see the monster rising in those beautiful green eyes."
Glancing at ranch owner it was clear from where they stood that indeed the sparks were building in Rayven's eyes. "I think you're right." I know you still care for me, sweetheart. If you give me a chance I won't let you down, again.
"Rayven?" Jaden spoke while holding two boxes. "Where do I put Donny's stuff?"
"And where do we put Jaxon's stuff?" asked Matt who was walking up behind Jaden.
It was obvious Rayven was quite out of her element and having a hard time making sense of all that was going on. One minute, she was living alone awaiting the birth of her child, the next her home was full of strange people and her ex-lover and son were moving in with her. Shaking her head several times, she took a moment to compose herself. When she felt her world begin to settle, she took control. "Jaxon?" she called out.
"Yes, boss?" the deep voice rumbled next to her ear as a long arm slid across her shoulders. "What's up?" Jaxon smiled slightly as she felt Rayven lean towards her. Yes! She could have shouted. I knew she still felt something.
"UmmÖyou need to let your friends know where to put your things." Jaxx is so warm and solid, secure and unmovable. I wish I could stay like this forever, tucked in the protection of her arms. She wouldn't . . . couldn't . . . let down her guard with Jaxon. No matter how appealing the idea . . . or the woman . . . happened to be.
Jaxon knew that Rayven's bedroom was on the first floor. "Are you staying in your old room?"
"Yes."
"Donny?" Jaxon yelled getting her son's attention. "There are two bedrooms left on the bottom floor, pick one and take Jaden with you."
"I'll take the other one." She said as she squeezed Rayven's shoulder gently then removed her hand and went back to unpacking the vehicles.
As Jaden walked into the yellow farmhouse his senses were flooded with the aromas of cinnamon, apples and baking bread. "What is that awesome smell?" he called out, stopping quickly which caused Matt to run into the back of him.
"Cinnamon buns and homemade apple pies." Rayven blushed slightly. "I had the urge to cook this morning." Cooking had always been a favorite pastime of hers and when she was stressed or upset it was a way for her to work out excess energies.
Jaxon came up to stand beside her wife. "It smells fantastic, mouth watering even."
Donny came running down the hall turning the corner so fast he skidded into Max. "When are they coming out of the oven? I'm starving."
"But, you just had breakfast," stated Jaxon.
"Mom, McDonalds isn't homemade apple pie." He wined.
Jaden replied, "Later. After we've eaten some real food maybe your Mom will let you have some."
"Cool." Donny said as he began to tug on Jaden's hand. "Let's hurry so we can eat some real food."
The timer went off and Rayven opened the oven, releasing a powerful wave of fresh-baked-bread-and-cinnamon scent. Jaxon shut her eyes and moaned in ecstasy.
Emily laughed and bumped Jaxx with her shoulder. "Come on tuff stuff, let's get this done so you can pig out."
Winking at Rayven, the firefighter replied, "Do you know how long it's been since I've had home cooking?" Before anyone could respond she added, "Years." Jaxon loved the blush covering Rayven's beautiful face.
"You never learned how to cook?" asked Rayven.
"Mom can burn water." yelled Donny, as laughter came from his room.
"Now I'm offended," pouted Jaxx as she turned and left the room.
Rayven shook her head and went back to buttering the rolls and setting out the pies to cool.
<<<<
The morning passed quickly. People trampled in and out of her home until finally the last item was put in its place. She was glad that Jaxx had such a wonderful support system. Jaden and Matt included Donny in everything they did, never making him feel like a "kid", but more like one of the guys. They were great role models for the boy.
As lunch time rolled around, the guys offered to grill up hamburgers and hotdogs that Jaxon brought - which was good because Rayven was concerned how she would feed them as she didn't keep much food in the house. In moments the whole gang was crowded around the picnic tables under the maple tree in the back yard, piling their plates full of food.
Emily, she found, had been born at Silver Lake but left shortly thereafter as her father was transferred. She'd always wanted to come back and see what the area was like. When her Uncle, who was retiring, offered her the job of Deputy, she jumped at the chance. Not long after moving back she stopped Hailey Phillips for reckless driving and speeding. They had been together ever since. In an odd sort of way, Rayven was thrilled that Emily was attached. Jealousy wasn't a nice feeling - especially when she had no right to be.
Darlene and Amelia owned Herbs American, a multi-million dollar business that they started in a small green house in their back yard. Rayven and Amelia spent quite some time talking about different herbs and their healing properties as well as their culinary uses. Rayven related a story to them about a patch of ground her mother used to get her herbs from. She suggested they come back at a later date and she would take them to see it.
After everyone had eaten all the buns and apple pies, the friends said their goodbyes patting their full stomachs and stating it was past time for a nap. Jaxon walked them to their vehicles while Rayven helped Donny with cleanup.
As the six walked to the parked vehicles, Amelia turned towards Jaxon. "I can see why you're still in love with Rayven, she is the most natural and honest person I've ever meet."
"Absolutely beautiful," chimed in another.
"A tender spirit."
"Intelligent and witty."
"Stunning."
"YesÖYes . . . Yes." Jaxon laughed. She couldn't be happier - her friends liked Rayven.
"Seriously," Jaden added. "It's clear that Rayven has feelings for you, but there is also a great amount of pain in her eyes, Jaxx. I believe there will be a happy ending but it's going to take time and patience."
As Emily reached for the door handle to her pickup she added. "If my instincts are right, Rayven isn't married. For some reason she avoided my questions about her husband joining her."
They each gave Jaxx a hug and wished her well, leaving a very thoughtful ex-firefighter in the dust created by the vehicles.
<<<
Jaxon and Donny were arranging their rooms and getting the last of their items settled. Rayven wandered around feeling helpless and depressed. She should have felt elated, because Jaxx was back in her life, but she didn't. She was consumed with doubt.
She felt like she was losing control of her life. Jaxon had always been the one to make the final decisions. She took over and made things happen. Sometimes she bullied people, other times she gave them her 'evil' stare; either way, Jaxon Segreto didn't know the meaning of the word compromise.
"Rayven?" The ex-firefighter questioned as she came around the side of the house and saw the blond leaning against the weeping willow tree in the back yard. "Is something wrong?"
"Is something wrong?" she laughed softly.
"I noticed you left and wondered if you were feeling okay." Don't bail out now, my love. Please give us a chance.
"I was wrong. I've changed my mind. This won't work, Jaxon," she said.
"Rayven, please," she murmured. "At least give it a chance."
"I'm sorry your friends went to a lot of effort to move you, but I. . ."
"You're afraid to be alone with me," she said flatly.
Rayven shoved off from the tree and glared at her. "I'm not afraid of anything." It was a lie and she sensed her ex-lover knew it. She'd been running from her emotions for eight long years.
"You would rather have a stranger live in the house with you than me?" Jaxon asked quietly.
"Yes, NoÖ. I had the bunkhouse redone. He or she would have stayed there."
"I won't hurt you, Rayven. I promise." She moved around the edge of the picnic table to stand closer to the woman she loved. "We can't change the past, Rayven. I wish I could, but it is done and all we can do is move forward. Please move forward with me."
Rayven tucked a length of blond hair behind her ear and looked away as she flinched. "I don't know you anymore, Jaxon. Don't you understand you are like a stranger to me?"
"I can't leave you here alone, Rayven, please don't ask that of me. Whatever anger, doubt or confusion you may feel towards me please let me do this one thing for you. Just for the summer. Please, baby. If you want, Donny and I will move into the bunk house." If begging would allow her to stay than she would beg. Rayven was far more important than her pride. Hell, she'd do battle with the devil before she'd let this opportunity go.
"No, I won't have that sweet boy living in a bunk house."
"Than give us the summer, it's your call. You make the decision." Jaxon held her breath waiting for the answer.
Why did life have to be so hard? Rayven thought. She didn't realize she was crying until she felt the heat of her tears against her skin and the brush of Jaxon's gentle fingers across her cheek.
Rayven closed her eyes, releasing the last of her tears. "Jaxon," she whispered shakily, "what do you want from me?"
"A chance to help you," she answered. A chance to prove to you I will always love you.
"Why?"
"You want the truth?"
"Yes. I need the truth."
Jaxon drew her finger along the blonde's throat, down to the silken curve of her slightly swollen breast in a slow, tantalizing motion, watching the involuntary reaction of Rayven's body to the sensual caress. Then she cupped her wife's chin and lifted her gaze to look into taller woman's eyes. For a moment, the world stood still and everything else faded away around them.
The ex-chief lowered her head, brushing Rayven's soft lips with her own. The journalist's heart stirred, searching for an ember of the love that had once consumed her. Then the panic seized her and she nearly fought. But Jaxon shifted her large hands to cradle her face and she lost all desire to run. The warmth and love in the open blue eyes held hers, calmed her and rendered her beyond thought. Then they were kissing again. Only this time she was pulled closer, sliding small hands down a long muscular back as Jaxx coaxed her lips open.
Jaxon stroked her tongue in her mouth taking the kiss deeper with each thrust, pulling her tight as Rayven melted into the taller woman's embrace. The familiarity of the embrace nearly overwhelmed her. The strength in the long arms, the width of the shoulders she loved to run her hands across and the breasts that were pressed above her own told her it was no longer a young woman that held her, but a mature woman. It seemed an eternity before she was released.
"Because," Jaxon whispered breathlessly, "because I love you and always will."
The answer brought Rayven back to her senses and she pulled away. "That shouldn't have happened, Jaxon," she said.
"I'm not going to apologize for showing you how I feel, Rayven. I love you and I always have. Good night, sweetheart." Jaxon replied. Turning, she walked toward the house, disappearing into the darkness of the night.
<<<
A week later, Jaxx was sipping her coffee as she watched Rayven make breakfast. She needed to do something to help break the tension in the air. Then a smile came to her face; she knew just the thing. "Rayven?"
"Yes?" she replied without turning around.
"I have to go up to Cutter's Meadow this morning to check on a sighting of a momma bear and her cubs. What do you think about putting together a picnic lunch and you and Donny come with me?"
"You mean I make the lunch and you and Donny load the truck." Rayven turned around, her eyes sparkling with excited.
"Right." Jaxx laughed. "I can make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches."
"How about left over chicken and potato salad from last night?"
"Great. Maybe we'll get lucky and see them up close. You could bring your cameras. Black bears are an endangered species. It might make for a good story."
"I would really like that." Rayven's green eyes twinkled with anticipation. "As long as I can make it up to the ridge, I would love to go. I'd like to take some pictures. I haven't written anything in a while. I think I may be getting rusty."
"I'll help you and we'll take it slow. I'd really like for you to come with us." Jaxx looked at her wife with honesty and sincerity.
"Let's do it." Rayven smiled and turned to start making their lunch.
Once they were in the area, the ex-Chief turned on the radio-tracking equipment. The big sow wore a collar that gave off a signal she could track. Pulling off onto a rough logging road, Jaxx pointed up the hill. "The information I received said she was spotted on that ridge. She was digging roots and eating berries."
"After not eating all winter, I'd be hungry too."
Jaxx laughed. "Cobie Markham, who's with the Fish and Wildlife, usually checks on the sightings but he broke his leg a couple of weeks ago. So when he called last night I agreed to check it out for him. I'm glad you decided to come Rayven."
"Me to." added Donny.
Jaxon shoved the truck into gear, and they rattled up the barely visible road. She was careful of potholes and bumps. She didn't want Rayven jarred around too much. An hour later, the three were moving slowly toward a mountain meadow when Jaxon pointed. "There they are!"
"Where?"
"There. See? Just inside the tree line."
Rayven made out a dark brown shape inside the woods, far down the slope. As they watched, the sow moved into the open, followed by her two cubs. She was pulling something off the low bushes with her mouth. Rayven unpacked her camera. Jaxx could hear the shutter click as the journalist took pictures. The old sow paused and started digging up the ground, throwing earth behind her. A big paw full of dirt hit the largest cub full in the face. It sneezed, shook itself and bounced over to tackle the other cub. The two rolled on the ground like puppies.
"Jaxx, these bears are brown. Why do you call it a black bear?" asked Rayven as she continued to take their picture.
"The name is misleading, as they may be black, brown, cinnamon, or even blonde in color. In this area they are browner in color, but on the Deschutes National Forest they are black and cinnamon in color near Newberry Caldera. At Cultus Lake and Elk Lake there have been reports of blonde bears.
Donny was spellbound. "Mom, this is great."
"It's not often you're going to see something like that." Both women were talking very softly, while Donny watched transfixed. Jaxx had made sure they approached the meadow from downwind. The bears had not sensed their presence. She also brought along a dart rifle and a vial of tranquilizer called Telazol, the preferred anesthetic agent for large non-domestic wild animals, including black bears. Typically, 2 - 3 cubic centimeters of the drug would sedate a bear within 5-15 minutes. Jaxon wasn't taking any chances with the lives of the people she loved.
"It's sad what's happening to the bears." Jaxx began. "The demand for medicinal and aphrodisiacal value has caused the increase of illegal killing of the black bears. Poachers kill the bears just to get their gallbladders; jaws and paws, and then leave the rest to rot. With the right contacts, they're worth more on the international market than heroin."
"More than heroin? That's crazy." Rayven replied disgustedly.
"Pound for pound, yes. In some foreign countries a dried gall bladder will go for $50,000 or more. Cobie says it's becoming a big problem. There are almost no more bears left in some of the foreign countries so the poachers come here."
Rayven looked at the magnificent animals at the far end of the meadow. She thought about her plans for the ranch and decided it was time to share her dreams with Jaxx. With the ex-firefighter's connections maybe they could help the bears.
"I've been thinking about the future of the ranch, Jaxon, and what I want to do with it. I believe I might have an answer to help some of the bears."
Jaxx turned to look at Rayven, interest showing in her eyes. "Please, tell me."
Rayven went on to tell Jaxx the details of her dreams and how she could offer a section of the ranch for the bears. It would be a large enough section that the bears wouldn't feel closed in like at a zoo, but would be safer from poachers. She went on to tell about the dude ranch and the climbing school.
Jaxx was excited and extremely interested, adding information and encouraging Rayven to follow her dreams. Rayven was glad she had shared her dreams with her "friend".
"She got one!" Donny said suddenly. The women looked to see the big sow gulping something.
"What did she get, son?"
"Didn't you see her jump at that ground squirrel when it ran?" Donny laughed with excitement.
Down in the meadow, the sow was sitting in the hole she had dug. Propped like a person in a lawn chair, as she nursed her two cubs. Minutes ticked by, and nothing else happened.
A short time later, Rayven asked for Jaxx hand to help her up. She stood and stretched, stiff from sitting so long on the hard ground.
"Do you want to find a safer place to have our picnic? The bears will sleep through the middle of the day, but I'd rather not take any chances."
"Let's go to Oconto Falls and have lunch and let Donny play in the water."
"That's a great idea. I brought the climbing gear. Maybe I'll climb the Kiral - that is, if you don't mind."
"I don't mind. I'd love to watch you climb. I went up there after I first arrived to climb a little but there was another climber on the face." Looking thoughtfully, Rayven turned and looked at Jaxx. "That was you?"
"Well, if it was the end of April, yeah it could have been me." Jaxx engulfed the journalist's hand with her own to help her walk across the rocky path. "I had just got back from rescuing a lost little girl and I needed to wear off some excess energy."
"Did the rescue go bad?" she asked so she wouldn't think about the shaft of lightening that had hit her body with Jaxx's simple touch - the heat and power in those long, strong, fingers which were softly curled around her own, fingers that used to caress her body, bringing it to a feverish pitch causing her to scream her wife's name.
"The little girl is a diabetic," she replied. "It was close."
No words were necessary as they continued down the path to the vehicle that would take them to the falls.
<<<<
From a pay phone on the corner of Main Street, Aunt Lois spoke softly. "I have what you want." Lois always made her contact calls in broad day light in front of anyone who wanted to see her. She felt a thrill doing something illegal under their noses. She smirked as she heard the call connect and the phone answered.
The contact voice hesitated. "What do I want?"
"You are a hunter," she announced. "That doesn't hunt the typical prey." As the silence continued on the other end, Lois added. "You haven't had much luck hunting lately."
"Luck can always be improved," the stranger acknowledged.
"This means you need me."
"Maybe."
"Guaranteed to bring successful hunting." the woman promised.
"I suppose that could be useful," the stranger allowed. "Just what, exactly, are we talking about here? Is the prey healthy and a challenge? How can I trust you?"
Breathing deeply Aunt Lois explained. "A mutual friend, the governor, suggested you would like to join him in a "human" hunt next month. Are you interested?"
Hearing a gasp of pleasure on the other end of the connection, Lois knew she was $150,000 dollars richer. Not bad for a few hours work.
"Yes, I'm very interested."
<<<
"I'd like to use the pyramid workout method, go up an easier climb of 5.10 three or four times, then do one slightly harder a few more times, and so on. I wanted to do this workout the last time I was here but it's too dangerous without someone to belay me."
"I'm glad you didn't." A picture of Jaxon laying hurt and alone flashed through her mind. "I'll belay you."
"Mom, I want to show Rayven how I can climb," stated the small boy.
"You've taught him how to climb already?"
Looking sheepish, Jaxx's only response was a smile as she moved to reach the first handholds.
Rayven had to take in rope as fast as she could to keep up with Jaxon on the first pitch. The ex-firefighter was speed climbing, making huge, precise dynamic lunges on the big holds.
"Quickly!" Jaxx called as Rayven started to lower the taller woman. The journalist let the rope run, only slowing when her wife's feet were directly above the ground.
"Great! Thanks! Climbing," Jaxon started up again. By the fifth time, she was panting hard, but her moves stayed precise and graceful. She moved sideways such that the rope ended up over on a 5.14 climb. After going twice up that one, she landed beside the blond. Her hair was dripping with sweat; damp bangs clung to her forehead.
"Anything harder?" Jaxon leaned down to stretch her legs.
"You know there isn't, you big goof."
Jaxx grinned at the smaller woman. "Climbing?"
"Climb on."
Rayven watched with amazed admiration as Jaxx moved; the way her muscles bulged under the now wet tee shirt, the swell of her muscular arms, the thighs that flexed against the tight jeans. How those long fingers griped tightly to the smallest rock holds. Memories of how Jaxx's long lean body moved in a sensual dance over her own and how the long, lean muscular back arched when her wife reached her climax flooded her. Her thoughts were disrupted by Jaxon leaning against a rock in front of her panting, watching her with the slightest of knowing smiles on her flushed face.
"That was fantastic! I wanted this type of workout for sometime. I'm glad you were here to share it with me." Taking a deep breath she asked, "Are you sure you want to climb, Rayven?" a hint of trepidation in her voice.
"I'm sure. The doctor said it was okay until next month. I'll get too big by then and with you here I know I'll be safe. Let's do a 5.0 to a 5.2. My climb won't be nearly as strenuous as yours but I also need a workout."
"Give me a minute and I'll put you on belay." Jaxon didn't like the fact Rayven wanted to climb being almost six months pregnant but she also realized she needed to be supportive of her wife's decisions. The doctor may have said it was alright but Jaxx was determined to make sure the small woman was safe. "When you're done I'll let Donny give it a go."
Rayven nodded and concentrated on stretching out in the few minutes she had. She knew that this would be her last climb, but it was important for her to do this with Jaxx. This one time. Watching Jaxon move seemed to have rubbed off a bit because she positively flew up the first pitch. The fire fighter brought her down so fast it was basically a long fall. She whooped with exhilaration and started back up again. It wasn't anything like she was used to but she thought she realized her body limitations and in no way wanted to endanger her child. By the third climb she was slowing down, considerably.
Jaxon's concern was evident as she brought the shorter woman to the ground the last time. "Excellent!" Rayven's smile made the blue eyes come alive. The journalist spun to return a high five, and her legs buckled, the muscles exhausted from the climb. Jaxx caught her; the blond found herself securely tucked against a soft breast, held firmly in her companion's arms. "Are you okay? You're not hurt, are you?"
"Sorry, my legs gave out."
"Donny," yelled Jaxx, "bring the canteen, quickly."
Gently sitting Rayven down on a nearby grassy patch, she took off the smaller woman's helmet, gloves and harness. As Donny came running up with the canteen, she loosened the cap and handed it to the shaken woman.
"Mom, is Rayven going to be okay?"
"I'm just fine. That was a great workout. Thanks." Rayven's gaze went to Jaxon.
Jaxon frowned and bent down; sliding the climbing shoes off the small feet in front of her and then began to pack up the equipment.
Rayven noticed Jaxx's change of moods and wondered if the ex-firefighter was upset. She received her answer when Jaxon told Donny to start packing up their things - they were heading home. When Donny said he hadn't got to climb yet, the answer was not today.
"That's not fair," murmured Donny, as he turned to take the first load to the truck.
Rayven reached out her hand and touched Jaxon's forearm, feeling the tremors under the skin. She's afraid for me, thought the blond. Looking closer she noticed her friend's body visibly shaking. I did this to her. I scared her. Why do I always have to think of myself?
"I'm sorry."
Silence.
"I probably shouldn't have pushed myself so hard. It's difficult sometimes to know my limitations since I'm pregnant. Before, I could go for a long time, like you did. This is new to me, Jaxx."
"You could have gotten hurt," whispered the solemn woman.
"Jaxon, look at me."
The dark head raised slowly, the look of fear, anger and something else lurked in the sad blue eyes.
"I'm alright. See. My breathing is back to normal. I just over did it a little. I won't climb again until after the baby is born. I promise. Beside, I knew you would keep me safe."
"I will always keep you safe," came the response.
"Forgive me?"
"You sure you're okay and you promise to see the doctor tomorrow?"
Sighing, but pleased, Rayven could do no more than agree; she had scared herself also. "Let the boy climb, please. He really was looking forward to it. I'll sit here and watch. I won't even get up to help."
"You sure?"
"Positive. If you could bring me some fruit or crackers I'll sit her and eat while I watch you both."
Finally the smile that had stolen her heart so many years ago crossed the magnificent woman's features. "Okay."
It was almost five by the time they pulled into Silver Lake. After the long day of watching the bears and then climbing, Rayven felt like she could eat a horse. Mentally she was going through what there was to eat in the house when Jaxon said, "Have you tried the new pizza place out yet? I'm starved. How about we stop there?
Rayven's mouth watered at the thought of pizza, but she shook her head. "I can't, Jaxx. I didn't bring any money with me."
"Mom will pay." Donny added. "Please, I love pizza and they have these cool video games to play."
"That's right. I'll treat. Come on. You must be as hungry as I am. I don't want you to have to cook for us after the day we've had. Think of it as a thank-you for helping me with such a great workout this afternoon."
Rayven wavered. She could almost smell the pizza. "Okay." She smiled. "Thanks. I am starved."
"Great! We'll go just as soon as you get checked out by the doc whose office, I noticed, is still open.
Rayven groaned but complied.
When they left the doctor's office Rayven held within her a secret that she cherished.
As they ate pizza, Jaxx brought up Donny's birthday and asked what he wanted to do this year.
"I'd really like to go floating down the river, Mom." Donny grinned. "I could ask a bunch of my friends to go and maybe Rayven could go with us."
Jaxon wiped her napkin across her mouth. "Rayven, do you think you'd feel up to going? The section of river I plan on taking them is really calm. Not too heavy on the rapids and the water isn't too rough; it's called the Loop Back. There are several sections that will be bumpy and you may get some spray. Nothing like we've done in the past."
Reaching into her bag she brought from the truck, she brought out her cell phone, "I'll call and ask the doctor if he feel's it would be all right."
While Rayven spoke on the phone for a few minutes, Jaxx and Donny planned who he wanted to go with them. His total so far was eight boys, including himself. He also wanted Jaden and Matt to go.
As she ended the call and placed the phone back in her bag she turned to them with a smile. "Dr. Dalton said that as long as the water wasn't too rough and had no heavy rapids I should be fine. I need to watch about being in the sun too long and a few other things, but yes, if you want me to go Donny. I'll go."
"Yeah, it's going to be great, Mom. Can we go home now so I can call my friends?"
"If it can be arranged soon it would be better. By next month I'm not sure I'll be able to go." A hint of sadness and awe filled her voice. She was so excited about having twins, but at the same time knew it was going to be more difficult. Soon she wouldn't be as active and she would miss that part. Also, what was she to do if Jaxon left and she was all alone on the ranch when the babies came?
"How does next weekend sound? That will give Donny time to get a hold of his friends and I need to see if Jaden and Matt can go with us."
A few minutes later they were in the truck heading back to Sleepy Springs Ranch.
<<<
As Jaden watched, Gilmore packed up his belongings and left the camp. He had no hard feelings over firing him. His instincts told him it wouldn't be the last they saw of him either.
<<<
As the parents dropped the kids off Friday evening, several of them greeted her before they left to spend the weekend without children. Some were going shopping in the large city about six hours away, others were going to use the time to rest and enjoy their partners and quiet time.
"You know," Jaxon said as she drew near, "we ought to take these kids climbing some Saturday," Rayven's gaze met hers and she paused, startled. There was something . . . different in the way Jaxx was looking at her. She couldn't put her finger on it, but for some reason, it made her even more nervous than usual.
"That would be awesome!" Scott Brown, who was eight, couldn't contain his excitement. Most of the others chimed in, except for Willy, a very small nine- year-old. "Count me out; rafting is scary enough. The only reason I'm here today is because Donny wanted me to come."
Jaden and Matt had arrived several hours earlier and now were herding the boys to the barn where they would take turns riding Rayven's ATV, horses and generally anything that would wear them out so hopefully they'd go to sleep before morning.
The next morning, after breakfast, they all stood around in front of the vans as Jaxon went over the safety and team rules. Everyone had been paired up with a team mate. "Okay." Jaxx began as she pulled a list from her pocket. "I have all the signed releases, from your parent's, for medical attention if someone gets hurt. You've all heard the rules. It's going to be a wild and exciting time. If anyone doesn't want to go, now is the time to speak. Once you're in the vans the only way out is to see this weekend to the end. Is that clear?"
She got a chorus of answers from the kids and some wisecracks about chickening out. Some of the kids had never been camping or rafting before.
"Cut it out guys. Not going along is a choice. No one needs to be ashamed. Everyone on the face of the earth has some things they'd rather not do and besides this is supposed to be fun. Last call. Any takers?"
None of the kids backed out. At the end of the talk, yelling kids piled into the two vans. Laughing, Rayven turned to Jaxon. "Have you ever done this before?"
"Taking this many kids camping?" She clarified, because she knew that they had went camping and rafting many times together before. "No. You?"
Rayven nodded, negatively. "It looks like it will be eventful and exciting."
The look in Jaxon's eyes was disturbingly tender. Rayven felt herself blush.
"I'm really glad you decided to come, Rayven. We're going to have a great time."
"I just hope sleeping on the ground won't be too uncomfortable."
"I have a surprise for you . . ." A loud wolf whistle sounded and Rayven looked up to see most of the kids and Matt grinning at them out of the van's window. "You'll find out later." Jaxon turned and walked to the bus. "Okay, okay, we're coming."
It was amazing the amount of noise young boys could make in a van, which Jaden had borrowed from a friend of his. He and Matt were following in one of the company's van with the other four boys and equipment, sleeping supplies and, of course, enough food to feed a small army. Rayven seemed to be the center of the action. Secretly watching her friend in the melee, Jaxon smiled. The journalist was so good with kids.
It seemed to take no time to get to the place where they were to camp. Jaden, Matt and Jaxon, along with all the kids, unloaded the vans. Nobody would let Rayven help lift anything. It was nice to have people who cared about her but it also was a bit suffocating.
The van Jaden drove also pulled a small trailer loaded down with bikes and other sporting supplies that had to be unloaded. Once that was done, one van would take them to the drop off point while the other was parked where they would leave the river. They loaded back into the van and headed to the unloading docks, which was ten miles away. The first trip down the river would be a short one, designed to give the kids a chance to experience the water before taking them on a longer one the following day. Jaden and Matt slid the rafts off the top of the vans while Rayven and Jaxon got the kids into bright yellow life jackets.
Jaxon had on a wetsuit and a form-fitting jacket, but the rest wore the same oversized safety vests the kids did. Though Rayven made a face while buckling hers over her body, she didn't argue, as she knew it would do no good.
"I hope everyone is ready for this." Jaxon moved the raft into the current. Jaden and Matt followed with the other four boys.
"Here we go. Here we go!" The boys chanted.
"Shut up, you guys. I'm scared enough already." Willie's voice shook. He grabbed the hand holds tightly.
While the river was not fast running nor did it have heavy rapids, there were several dips and some rough water to go through. To young boys it could be very scary.
Rounding a sharp bend in the river Rayven could see a haze of spray in the air after the first hump of water. Jaxon held the raft sideways in the current, timing it just right so that the front slid smoothly into the vee of water that fed the center of the small rapid.
Rayven whooped as she and Jaxon swung into the air. The raft pitched up over the first small haystack. Knowing what was coming next, she clenched her fits on the ropes attached to the raft and held her breath. The front of the raft plunged down, going half way underwater. Ice-cold water slapped Rayven from head to foot, and she yelled and looked at Jaxx as they came up. Their sparkling eyes met, and with identical grins, they hit the next small haystack. Kids were screaming and laughing around them. Two more small bucks and out into calm water.
Rayven shook the water out of her hair, feeling it come unplastered from her head. It was probably sticking straight up too, but she didn't care. Wet, wild and extremely sexy looking, Jaxon's eyes were sparkling with fun.
"Like it, guys?" Jaxx shouted and was answered with a loud chorus of approval.
"I thought it would be scarier." Willie stated. "That was great!"
"I promised a nice slow ride. When you get a little older maybe we'll take you on a really wide ride." Jaxon answered the boy. "Tomorrow the ride will be longer."
For the next couple of hours the current moved the rafts along at a slow even pace. Jaxon offered Rayven her sports bottle, sun tanning lotion - even a hat. Jaxx was constantly keeping her eye on the smaller woman.
As they piled off the rafts at the end of the run, they were all laughing, "Who wants to go swimming?" Jase shouted as he stepped out of the raft and pulled it up on the sand bar.
"Sounds great. We'll join you," Jaxon agreed as she watched the boys jump into the water.
Rayven removed the shirt and shorts she was wearing over her swimsuit, and Jaxx hung them with the others across a handy branch before she joined them all in the water.
They swam and played for awhile before they were all ready to head back to camp for dinner.
While Rayven waited for the boys and rafts to be loaded she turned her face so she felt the warm sun and cool breeze sweep across her. It was gentle and exhilarating all at once. She gave a small laugh. It was a feeling she was coming to know well, that off-balance-love-it feeling. That was how she felt every time she was near Jaxon. Her eyes snapped open at the startling thought and she found herself staring into Jaxon's thoughtful blue eyes.
Scott and some of the kids were racing for the van and bumped into Rayven, knocking her off balance. Before she had the chance to think, strong arms caught her and held her fast. Rayven looked up, and Jaxon's tender grin and concerned eyes took her breath away. Jaxx felt far warmer than any summer night she'd ever known. The firefighter lowered her head slowly and Rayven thought her heart would stop. Her wife's very nearness robbed her of a certain will and made her desperately hungry. She moistened her lips. Need slammed into her. Was Jaxx going to kiss her? Right here? She hadn't exorcised her wife from her body after all, had she? What had made her think that possible?
But her lips stopped next to the smaller woman's ear. "Did you have a good time?" The whispered question sent shivers through Rayven's now incredibly aroused body. Before she had a chance to pull away, Jaxx simply set her back on her feet and stepped back, that infuriating, teasing smile still in place.
They walked together in silence, river-smoothed pebbles scrunching under their feet. Rayven was almost painfully aware of Jaxon beside her, as though she were standing too close to a fire after being sunburned. Her every nerve ending seemed to be alive and sensitized to Jaxon's warmth, her every stride, her very presence.
"You know today confirmed something for me that I've been thinking about since you told me your plans for Sleepy Springs." Jaxon flipped another pebble into the air with her toe. "I think I'd like to help teach at the climbing school you plan on building, if you have an opening. I would like to train the young kids. To have them taught correctly before they develop bad or dangerous habits." The passion in her voice stirred Rayven's heart.
"It was great to see the kids have fun today." Rayven smiled. "I visited a climbing school in Austria that started their children out at seven years of age."
"At that young age they're so willing to learn." Jaxon responded. "It's harder to help adults who have already formed habits that aren't safe or healthy. Plus, adults are more stubborn than kids. Many men won't listen to a woman telling them how to do something. Most children don't mine what sex you are."
"Did you have many problems being Chief?"
Jaxon shrugged her shoulders and gave a half smile. "Some - mostly from guys who aren't from the area. First they didn't like a woman being Chief and then they didn't like the fact that I'm gay. It wasn't a good combination."
"Is that why you left?" Rayven wasn't sure what to say. Jaxon was talking more than they had since she moved in. Before, they were both so quiet with each other, neither feeling the need for words. Now, it was as if Jaxx was trying to share more of her thoughts and feelings, letting Rayven know who she was and what she wanted in life. It felt wonderful and terrifying.
"No." Came the quick reply.
There was a long silence. Their eyes locked and Rayven thought she would be consumed by the emotions swirling inside of her. She would gladly drown in the steady depth of Jaxon's tender, loving gaze.
After arriving back at the camp site Jaden and four of the boys went in search of sticks to use to roast their hot dogs and marshmallows with, while the others started a small fire in the fire pit and sat out the rest of the food.
That night Rayven received her surprise as Jaxon led her to one of the dome tents.
"I set up our tent."
The intimacy in Jaxx's voice made her heart race. This was going to be worse than she had thought. Entering the tent that was big enough to sleep four people, Rayven noticed Jaxon had brought along a new inflatable single air mattress specifically designed for pregnant women. It was about six inches high and had multiple cushions and a fluffy new pillow. "Thank you," she said.
"If you don't want me to sleep in the tent, I can sleep out under the stars. I've done it before." Jaxon wanted to sleep in the same tent with Rayven; she needed to be near her. This protective feeling she kept getting whenever she was close to Rayven was overwhelming and so powerful it was hard to shake it off.
"N. . . no. That's okay. I don't want you to sleep out in the cold air. I'm sure we can share the tent. Thanks for the air mattress, but you really didn't have to."
Sadness crossed Jaxx eyes. "I wanted to." she whispered. "I needed to."
Feeling like a jerk, Rayven touched Jaxon arm softly. "I'm glad you did and my body will be thanking you by morning." Fifteen minutes later they were ready for bed. When Jaxx took her hand and squeezed, she squeezed back.
"Good night, Rayven."
"Night." She replied.
Jaxx wanted Rayven so badly that she had to fight herself to keep from reaching for her. Something about the journalist very essence had found its way to her and into her so many years ago and that something was stronger, much stronger than she could have possibly believed. Her mouth went dry and her heart hurt each time it beat. She felt alive and so sexually charged that her body seemed like hot liquid.
Rayven could still do that to her: melt her down with a look, a touch and soft words.
She tried to turn her attention to the impossible task of finding a soft piece of ground under her so that she could sleep. Should have bought me one of those air mattresses too, she thought, but her mind was too filled with memories of their lovemaking, with worries of getting the magic back and what they'd lost between them. Sleep was a long time in coming.
The next morning as the first rays of light snuck in the screen windows of their tent, Jaxx waited for Rayven to wake.
"You're up," the blond said, no surprise in her voice. "I swear, you can get by on less sleep than anyone I've ever known."
Rayven sat up and Jaxx realized that her wife had worn a man's white undershirt to bed. For a moment, uncertainty and a jealousy she would never admit to surged through her; who had given her wife the white shirt? Looking closer, she noticed how worn it was and that a small "J" was embroidered on the right sleeve. Then Jaxon remembered. They had been living together only a few months when the journalist discovered how comfortable Jaxx's shirts felt. Now, although they hadn't been together in eight years, the smaller woman still clung to a piece of the past.
Feeling like she could shout, Jaxon stored that piece of information away. She asked how her companion had slept. Her answer was wonderful. Rayven studied her for several seconds until Jaxx realized her ex-lover was trying to decide whether to crawl out of her sleeping bag with her watching. Although she should have done the polite thing and turned away, she didn't, she couldn't. Instead she made no secret of her interest in her wife. With a sigh, the blond threw back the bag and stood on shaky feet. Beneath the shirt, she wore only underpants, which peeked out from under the hem of the shirt as she pushed herself to her feet. Her legs were as finely muscled as Jaxx remembered them. Those muscles, the way she used them to play, control and tease her . . .
Rayven returned the gaze, waiting until she'd taken her attention from her legs. Only when she had her ex lover's undivided attention did she ask, "What's planned for today?"
"Not sure," Jaxon responded huskily, her thoughts torn between memories of things better forgotten and the need, the drive to run her hands along Rayven's legs and then bury her face between soft full breasts.
"I'll be ready in a few minutes. Jaxon, I don't feel comfortable with you looking at me like that. It makes me feel . . . ."
"You're a beautiful woman, Rayven."
She blinked and for a second her mouth sagged. "I'm stiff, pregnant and soon to be as big as a barn, not beautiful." When Jaxx didn't say anything, she ran her fingers through her hair; a gesture that looked sensual - which Jaxon was sure was the last thing Rayven had intended. "What's for breakfast?" she asked. "I could kill for some bacon and eggs."
Before Jaxon could respond, the air filled with noises of young boys getting ready to face a new day. Jaxx threw back the sleeping bag and reached for her clothes.
"I'm going for a run." Unzipping the tent flap she exited then zipped it back up giving Rayven the privacy she wanted.
The weekend flew by and, before anyone realized it, they were back in Silver Lake. Donny's birthday party was scheduled at McDonalds for four in the afternoon. The parents were to meet them there to pick up their children.
By seven three very tired people arrived at Sleepy Springs ready for baths and their own beds.
<<<
Fingering the yellow envelope while waiting for the private phone to be answered, Lois thought about where she would locate her next "human prey".
"Yes?"
"Loved the willow bark tea. Do you have any other tea's you'd like me to try?"
"Could be. Call me in a couple of weeks."
"Will do, governor." Lois ended the call more than pleased with their shared arrangements.