The Old Yellow House
By Koda Graystone
Summary - Rayven a wildlife photographer and journalist returns to claim her ranch, while Jaxon Segreto, Chief of the elite firefighter team Blue Mountain Firefighters does some soul searching.
Disclaimer - This is an original work of fiction. The characters are mine. The story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the author. This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way. Copies of this story may be made for private use only and must include all disclaimers and copyright notices. Some of the scenes/plot devices are actual events from my family history.
Some bad language, minor violence, a dead mouse and a nasty Aunt Lois who wants revenge.
Feedback - Any and all feedback, comments, and suggestions will be appreciated.
Started 2000 - finished August 2004 -- Story is complete.
I would like to thank those that have written asking how the revision was progressing. Sorry it has taken so long. The difference in this and what was previous posted I hope is a tighter story. I took many of your feedback suggestions and incorporated them into the new revision. I also took out some scenes and added a few new ones. I hope I also succeeded in tying up some lose ends and leaving an opening for a sequel if I chose to write one.
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They sat in stunned silence for what seemed a lifetime before the baby brought them back to reality. Unconsciously they both had linked their hands over Rayven's stomach.
"Whoa," Rayven said softly. "When did Tom die?"
"He died when I was seven months pregnant." Jaxon answered thoughtfully.
"He said you were only together that one time. He didn't try and rape you again did he?"
"It was true, Rayven, we got married and moved into a two bedroom apartment. I had one bedroom he had the other. We never slept together again. We never touched each other. In fact, when I told Tom I would be his wife in name only he seemed happy, like the thought of being with me disgusted him."
"How could someone not want to be with you?" She blushed, realizing what she had said.
Laughing softly, Jaxon said," The only person I ever wanted to be with was you, my love."
"Well . . . I . . . thought..."
"Shh," Jaxon pressed two fingers to Rayven's lips. "We may have been married; love, but I only saw Tom at the house a few times. The rest of the time I don't know where he was and I didn't care as long as he wasn't around me."
"I'm sorry." Rayven whispered. "I shouldn't have left like that. But all our life, Jaxon, I always believed your words. I never doubted you in any way. When you said that is what you would do if you were Mary Sue I truly believed it was what you wanted me to do. I thought you were telling me to leave. I never realized that he had raped you. You didn't say anything. I should have been here to help you through it." She cried. "I'm so sorry."
"I was fortunate; love, in that I don't remember the rape. I still don't. I remember seeing my friends' dead, hearing scattered words from the medic and Tom. The next thing I remember is you asking me why I had sex with Tom. The actual act didn't hurt, I didn't feel anything, physically or emotionally." She hugged Rayven closer. "My guilt, pain and regret came from hurting you. Not being raped."
"I didn't know. I'm sorry I wasn't here for you; sorry we wasted so many years. I have so many regrets over what happened. I should have known you wouldn't have slept with him. I knew you better than that. When I only received silence from you I thought it was because you simply didn't know how to tell me you didn't want me anymore."
"I love you, Rayven. That is in the past. I only wish..."
"What?"
"I wish that the child you are carrying was mine. What are we going to do about your husband?"
"We have many things to discuss, sweetheart. There are so many questions still left unanswered but there are several I can answer for you now."
"What do you mean?"
Taking a few moments to compose herself Rayven said,"I don't have a husband, Jaxon. I'm not married."
"Then who is the father of your baby?"
"Mark Serrano." She replied.
"Do you love him?"
"No. I hardly know him."
"What? Were you raped?"
"Hold on a minute." She stated, bringing Jaxon's fingers up to her mouth and kissing them slowly. She felt the tremors run through the body she was leaning against and smiled.
"Several years ago I decided I wanted a child. I never stopped loving you and maybe it was selfish or wrong but I wanted my child to look like you."
"That isn't selfish or wrong, love, it's very beautiful. Thank you."
She smiled, "Anyway, I viewed thousands of donors over the last few years but none of them were what I wanted. Then my last trip to Australia my guide could have been your twin - the resemblance was so amazing. I had a close friend who is also a private investigator run a check on him and it came back that Mark Serrano is your cousin."
"My cousin? Honey, I don't have a cousin named Mark."
"Years ago, your family split. One brother came out west and the other went to Australia. I have the papers in my bedroom of your family tree and also the proof that yes, Mark Serrano is your first cousin."
"So . . . the baby you are carrying is mine."
"Yes, as close as I could get. They are yours."
"The . . . they?" Jaxon stuttered.
"Yeah. At my last doctors visit I had them run the ultrasound. We are having two girls."
Jaxon turned Rayven around and drew her painfully close, wrapping her up, large hands spread over the very swollen belly. "Mine." She whispered, as happy tears rolled down her cheeks.
"Yes, love. The babies and I are yours. If you want us," she added with a hint of insecurity in her voice.
"Oh, God, if this is a dream, I don't ever want to wake up," she whispered. "My love, sweet, sweet love, of course I want you. I love you and the babies." Without breaking eye contact, Jaxon eased Rayven back against the blankets and slowly moved her head down to rest lightly on her lover's stomach. Turning her head, she kissed the swell of Rayven's belly while caressing her with her hands.
"Jaxon, please, no." Rayven felt embarrassed and shy. "It would be a little awkward right now, wouldn't it?"
"We could make it beautiful, Rayven. You and I." She slipped her hands under the maternity top and pulled it up to bare the swollen stomach.
"Jaxon, what are you doing?"
"I'm going to kiss my baby girls." She turned her face back to Rayven's stomach, gently kissing the swell.
"Please, Jaxon, I'm not . . . I'm not..." she began to cry.
"Oh baby, don't cry. You're beautiful to me. You are having our children. Honey this gift you are giving me is so wonderful I don't have words to express what it means to me."
"But my body is the size of a barn. I worked so hard at having a great body so if I ever met you again you'd like what you saw. Now, I can't even see my shoes." She cried harder.
"Shh, honey you're going to make yourself sick. Calm down please."
"I didn't want . . . you to see me like this."
"I love seeing you like this. You were always beautiful, but now you're radiant." Her voice was incredibly soft. "I love you more than life."
Shifting, Jaxon secured Rayven in the circle of her arms. She held her gently, whispering words of love whiling stroking her body as she would a frightened colt.
Rayven clutched her stomach as one of the babies kicked harder. "Oh, they are getting rambunctious." She sniffled.
Jaxon laughed softly and laid her hand on Rayven's belly. "Come on, sweethearts," she coaxed. "Let us know you're in there."
Rayven giggled. "Easy for you to say. You're not the one they're kicking."
One of the babies kicked again. "That's right, sweethearts. We're out here waiting for you both."
Another kick followed with a deep yawn from Rayven.
"We need to get you to bed, love. It's been a long day."
"A good day," she asked quietly.
"The best. Oh, Rayven, I've missed you; I've missed us. You are my heart, my soul, without you my life meant nothing.
"I love you too. But what should we tell Donny?"
"Donny knows I love you and always have. He'll understand."
A few moments passed in silence then Rayven glanced up at Jaxon with a look of determination. She wanted love and life and Jaxon . . . the way they used to be. "Honey, I have always loved you, there's no question about that," she said softly. "And I'm thankful that we have finally found out the truth after all this time. But loving and liking are two very different issues. You can have either one without the other. It's when you have both that the real magic happens, and I want to see if that magic is there for us."
"Rayven, we can't go back. Things can't be the same as they were. Not after all we've been through," Jaxon told her. She wanted Rayven's love, respect, and commitment. She wanted back all the things they'd lost. She swallowed hard. "In your years alone you learned how to live without me, but I learned something, too." In an unsteady voice, she admitted, "I can live without you, Rayven. I can survive. I just . . . don't want to. There's this place in my heart where only you fit, where you belong, without you I'm not a complete person.
Rayven's smile was immediate and as sweet and spontaneous as Jaxx could have dreamed it might be. "Oh, Jaxon." Rayven whispered her name before reaching her hand up to caress a tanned cheek.
Jaxx gathered her wife more securely in her arms, holding the small woman close, speaking hesitantly. "If you think that . . . maybe someday . . . you can feel at least part of the love you used to feel for me..."
"But I already love you, Jaxon, so much it hurts sometimes," she confessed. She stared up into blue eyes now wide with wonder . . . almost disbelief.
The fire fighters eyes misted with tears as she hugged Rayven and kissed the top of her head. "Thank you," she said aloud and her breath stirred the blonde hair with words. "Rayven . . . let's start over." She spoke gently. "Marry me, all over again."
"Yes, I'll marry you again, Jaxon."
"I love you so," she offered in a solemn, almost reverent tone. Her hands moved into silky loose hair as her gaze lowered to the smiling soft lips. "Always. Forever."
"Jaxx," Rayven replied, "I love you, too . . . so much." Then she rose, meeting her in a gentle exchange that deepened rapidly into a lingering kiss filled with the love and longing of the past years. "I've missed you," she whispered as Jaxon raised her chin to look into her eyes.
"How did I go on without you?" she wondered aloud. "I've missed everything about you. You're so gentle, loving, beautiful..." Jaxon spoke tender words that brought fresh tears to Rayven's eyes that she tried to blink away. "You're all I've ever wanted, Rayven."
"Am I?" she asked quietly. "Honestly? Still?"
Jaxon studied watery green eyes, so gloomy and wide with worry. "Honestly. Still," she answered, her eyes as dark as midnight. "And always."
Rayven's lips curved into the satisfied smile that Jaxon was watching for, and she moved with certainty back into the taller woman's embrace, knowing her place was there, in the depths of Jaxx heart. "We'll take things slowly. One day at a time and get to know each other all over again."
The look in Jaxon's eyes was one of pure love combined with a determination to show her soul mate who she had become without holding anything back. This was the chance that she had waited eight long years for and there was no way she would give this up. "We have already begun, Rayven. We need to communicate more. Share our feelings and our thoughts. I know in the past I wasn't always good at that but I promise I'll do better."
"Will you hold me while I sleep?"
"Honey, I'll hold you and keep you safe through the night, every night, as long as we live."
By the time they reached the yellow house and got ready for bed, Rayven was exhausted from the emotional events of the day. Jaxon held her so gently, so possessively, so protectively. The taller woman exuded heat and light, safety and love. The ex-firefighter made her feel complete. She rested her head against the tanned shoulder. Her mouth was against Jaxon's bare skin, the material of her nightshirt brushing against her cheek. "We'll live forever," Rayven promised, "because that's how long I'll love you..."
<<<
A shot rang out in the night followed by a female's cry. The very wealthy and crooked industrialist grinned broadly as he slung the high power rifle over his shoulder then turned heading for the black helicopter sitting on a small clearing barely large enough to land. The silent helicopter flew away with the promise of landing another day. The bears were let into the enclosed area to feed on the human prey. Later the bones would be ground into ashes and scattered in the winds.
<<
A week later, Lois reached to answer the insistent ringing of the phone wondering who would be calling her at this late hour. "Hello?"
"I have to talk to you," the caller said, knowing he didn't need to identify himself.
"What the hell do you think you're doing calling me here?" she demanded when she realized who the caller was.
"Yeah, well the plan backfired and Chief Jaden fired my ass. I need money."
"You expect me to give you money?"
"I suggest you consider for a moment some facts. One, you called me, two I can identify you and connect you with at least three murders. Do I get my money or not?"
Lois released a blast of profanity. "No, Mr. Gilmore, if I were you I would reconsider who you are dealing with," she said with disdain.
"I need money if I'm going to complete the job and you are going to give it to me. Understand?"
"Then you had better listen and listen well. Jaxon Segreto is staying at Sleepy Springs where she hooked up with her ex-lover Rayven McEllis, who is very pregnant. I want her taken out along with Segreto's kid. You got it."
"Why not take out Jaxon Segreto?"
"Because, you idiot, you want to cause her pain and they are the ticket. Do the job and you'll have more money than you can blow."
"Yeah, that would work. I want the bitch to feel the loss as I have."
"Good. It appears we have an understanding."
"Yes. What about the money?"
"I'll meet you at our usual place tomorrow at 4 p.m. Mr. Gilmore, don't mess this up or you won't live to regret it." And with the warning, the line went dead.
<<<
The phone rang on Saturday morning around seven. Jaxon reached for it. Normally, she would have been out working already but she had decided to take the day off and spend some quality down time with Rayven in bed resting and cuddling. Even through they hadn't taken their physical relationship to the next level, these moments of togetherness were pure bliss and times like these were helping to heal many deep wounds.
Jaxon answered on the second ring. "Hello."
"Jaxx, how are you?" came the far too chipper voice of her friend Darlene.
"I'm fine, Darlene. You know it should be criminal to sound so chirpy this time of morning? Is something wrong? Surely you wouldn't be calling at seven in the morning if there wasn't."
"No . . . I mean, not really . . . umm."
"What's up?"
"Well …. you said to give you some time alone with Rayven and all but well…. we miss you and …." Taking a deep breath she continued, "Okay, Jaxx, we're all dying to know how things are." Came a giggle. "Sounds like something teenagers would do doesn't it, checking up on each other."
Rayven laughed at hearing the conversation while she moved her fingers in circles across Jaxx firm stomach. "Friends - gotta love them." She whispered softly, as she kissed the tanned, soft skin under her lips, enjoying the tremors that ran through her wife's body.
"Hey, that's okay. I love you guys." She ran her fingers threw Rayven's blonde hair. "WE are doing fantastic."
"We?" questioned Darlene, excitement evident in her voice.
"Yes, we, my wife, the love of my life, my soul mate, and my best friend are lying here cuddling in bed, which by the way you disturbed us from." Jaxon had barely finished when she jerked the phone away from her ear as shouts of excitement and yells could be heard in the background.
A rustle, bang, a scraping noise then a deep breath was heard before Jaden spoke, "Jaxx, were so happy for you, both. The other reason we called was to invite you all to come climbing with us today. We haven't really had any quality time with Rayven and thought it would give us a chance to get to know her better. We planned on having a picnic up at Little River Falls. We thought we'd take the company van."
"It's really nice for you guys to think of us. How long have you been up?"
Laughing softly, Emily took the phone. "Morning tuff stuff. We've been up since five and fighting over calling you since six. The van's loaded; Matt and Hailey are finishing loading the food now. How about we pick you up in about an hour?"
"Just a minute let me ask Rayven."
Blue eyes full of excitement looked into soft green with a touch of sleep lurking in their depths. "Do you feel up to going, sweetheart? I did promise you a morning of cuddling. It's okay with me if we don't go."
Compromise, giving, sharing not taking, concerned about her feelings and desires were words that filtered through Rayven's vocabulary as she looked up at her soul mate. "I would love to go."
"Okay, we'll be ready. See you all soon." Hanging up she brought Rayven closer and hugged her gently. "Thank you, for loving me."
"Of course I love you. Besides I'm excited to get to know your friends better".
"I'll go wake up Donny and get our stuff together." Jaxx said before placing a soft kiss on Rayven's waiting lips, which grew in intensity that surprised them both. Chests heaving, pulses racing and lack of oxygen caused stars to shine before her eyes as Jaxx broke the kiss reluctantly. "Wow!"
A dreamy eyed Rayven couldn't agree more. "Yeah, we don't have time and to be honest I'm not ready yet." Looking sad and disappointed as unshed tears wet her eyes.
"Baby, it's okay. We said we'd take things slow. I love where we're going. I love you."
Rayven sniffled. "Yeah, it's just that my hormones are all confused. They say go for it, my heart says wait. I don't mean to tease you."
"You're not teasing me. I love the way our bodies respond to each other, but honey, I want more than sex, I want love, commitment and ever after. I want the magic. Just give us some time."
"Okay, I want that too," whispered the smaller woman as she wrapped her arms around Jaxx neck, burying her face in her wife's hair. "Love you."
<<<
"Rope!" Matt flung the coiled climbing rope far out into the air. It soared in a graceful arch, unwinding as it flew. It was one of those rare days in the mountains with virtually no wind. The clicking fall of tiny pebbles knocked loose by the disturbance of the rope sounded crisp and clear in the quiet air. Rayven could hear the voices clearly even through they hadn't raised their voices.
As Matt finished anchoring the first three ropes, he called down. "Would you put me on belay?"
Jaden complied quickly, setting up the rope so he could prevent his partner from falling. "Belay is on!"
Matt started to down climb doing beautiful gymnastic moves. His form was as close to Jaxx's as she'd seen.
Hailey Phillips cornered Rayven with a few friendly words as the rest of the group began discussing the plan of attack on the mountain face. Hailey was about her same height, short blonde hair and youthful features; she preferred white water rafting over mountain climbing, which was her specialty. "Emily and I would like you and Jaxon to come white water rafting with us sometime.
Rayven liked the brunette instantly. Laughing gently in return, she nodded. "I think that would be a great idea, although it will have to wait until after the babies are born."
"Babies!" Hailey took a step back and looked closely at the very pregnant woman before her. "Umm . . . you said babies. As in more than one?"
Rayven smiled. "I told Jaxon a couple of weeks ago after my last doctor's appointment. Please, don't spoil it for her by telling anyone. I think she's walking on clouds."
Hailey reached out and touched Rayven's arm lightly, "I just wanted to say how happy we all are for the both of you. "She released Rayven's arm and brought her hand up to brush the hair that had came loose away from her light gray eyes, "Jaxon has been lost for so many years. It does my heart good to see her find her center of balance again."
Rayven looked off into the distance for a moment collecting her thoughts, "Do many people know the whole story?" she asked quietly.
"Only, the six of us." Hailey frowned, wondering what the young woman was thinking. "She told us that about eight years ago she made the biggest mistake of her life, she betrayed you and lost you. She has lived with the guilt every day since then. There were times that we wondered if she would..." Hailey stopped realizing what she was about to say.
Rayven gasped, raising a hand to cover her mouth. Jaxon told her she had thought about ending her life, but until now she hadn't realized it was more than just a thought.
"Rayven?" A voice behind her spoke. "Rayven, are you Okay? What's wrong?" Jaxon asked as she walked up and wrapped a long tanned arm around the small woman.
Rayven turned and wrapped her tall lover in a hug, holding her as close as she could. The blonde didn't know what she would have done if Jaxon had taken her life. Tears began to flow from her eyes as soundless sobs shook her body.
Jaxon looked up to see Hailey silently walking away, joining her lover by the van. "Hey, what's wrong, honey?" she asked while rubbing the blondes' back softly. "What is it, sweetheart, what has upset you so?" She pulled back and wiped the tears from the soft checks as she gently lifted the writer's face.
Strong arms circled the blonde and pulled her into the shelter of the ex-firefighters body. "Promise me," Rayven sounded as if she was on the verge of hysteria. Taking a deep breath she added, "Promise me you will never leave me."
"Oh honey, I promise. I'm here for as long as you will have me." Jaxon frowned she didn't understand what set her love into such an emotional state. Maybe it's hormonal.
Emily and Hailey watched as Jaxon led Rayven over to one of the tables they had set up and helped her sit down. The tall woman slid in beside her and held Rayven close, encouraging the small woman to rest comfortably for a moment. The rest of the world drifted away while the two spoke softly to each other.
"Did Jaxon tell you the news?" asked Hailey softly as she watched the two lovers.
"Yeah, can you believe it? She has everything she's always wanted right there in her arms. I'm glad she's finally at peace."
Chapter Five
The month of July ended in discovery and joy, the reuniting of two lost souls. August was proving to be just as exciting. Rayven was in the kitchen finishing up dishes from breakfast, Jaxon had left hours before to check on fencing for the lower south pasture. Her thoughts drifted to the night before as she lay in bed with Jaxon's strong body wrapped around her. A smile came unbidden to her face as she remembered how warm and secure she felt. How large hands and long fingers rested gently on her swollen stomach and how soft words and loving kisses from her tall lover made her feel so safe and happy. A knock at the door caught her unawares. She'd been so caught up in her thoughts that she never noticed someone standing at the screen door.
"Bobbie?" she asked in response to seeing the child standing on her porch. Looking over his head she noticed his mother getting out the vehicle parked in her driveway. "What are you doing here? I thought you and Donny were going to ride your horses down to where Jaxx is working."
"We were. Only…"
"Only what?" she prompted. Seeing that Bobbie's mother was drawing near she greeted the young woman.
"We…well, we had a fight."
"You did? I'm sorry".
"Could I see him?"
"He's not here."
"Then where is he?" asked Bobbie.
Rayven looked at Bobbie's mother Rebecca and shrugged her shoulders. "Bobbie, I don't understand, what you are saying." As she placed her hand on the boys shoulder. "You had a fight and Donny isn't here. Do you know where he might be?"
"I…It's my fault…." The boy began to cry.
Rebecca knelt beside her young son. "Honey, what is your fault?"
"He said that since he turned eight his Mom would take him on all her rescues and that he can climb mountains with her and stay out all night by himself. He said that he has to prove to you and his Mom he's a big man now so you won't send him away."
"Oh my God!" stated Rayven. "Send him away? Why would he think that?"
Sniffling, Bobbie wiped the tears from his eyes. "He said that since you're back with his Mom and you're having a baby that you won't want him around anymore. So if he can prove to you both that he is a big man you will let him stay."
"Do you have any idea where he may have gone?"
"No, just that he said he was going to prove to you both he's big enough to allow him to stay with you." Bobbie quieted seemingly thinking. "I…think he's going to go up to where the bears are. He mentioned that if he could stay all night with the bears that would be cool."
"Okay, well I need to go get Jaxx. I think you for coming to tell me, Bobbie. We'll bring Donny back. Don't worry."
"How can I help?" Rebecca asked.
"I don't know. I need to get in touch with Jaxx, if you will excuse me, please."
"I'm sure you'll find Donny and he'll be fine." Taking Bobbie's hand she jogged to the vehicle.
Rayven rushed into the house and locating the radio on the kitchen table called Jaxx, thankful that her wife had bought the radios and shown her how to use them. She gripped the radio, speaking slowly in an effort to keep her emotions under wraps, disconnecting once as she had relayed all the information. Jaxon was on her way back as fast as she could.
Realizing that it would take Jaxon awhile to get back, Rayven decided to put her pack together and saddle up a fresh horse. She couldn't believe the boy actually thought that they didn't want him. Hurrying, she gathered up a few items and grabbed the backpack rushing down the hall. Stopping next to Donny's door she opened it and looked inside to see if something was missing. She noticed his sleeping bag as well as his backpack was gone. A note was lying on his pillow. Picking it up in shaky hands she read it. Dropping it back on the bed, she hurried back down the hall and out the back door.
Rayven got the ATV out of the barn, then went back to saddle Ginger, speaking quietly and calmly to the curious horse. The note mentioned the cougar's den Jaxx had told him about. He wanted to see the babies. To a child's mind, Rayven felt if Donny could get a hold of one of the babies it would prove he was a big boy.
She wouldn't be able to lift the saddle from the bench, but she could have the horse caught and haltered by the time Jaxx arrived. Grabbing a halter, she started to go out the side door when she saw movement in the back of the barn. Tentative she spoke, "Donny? Donny is that you?"
Waiting for a moment and not receiving an answer Rayven gently stepped forward. "Donny, I love you. I would never send you away."
Once again Rayven listened intently. She heard the sounds of soft sobbing. 'Thank you God' she whispered. She walked back to the far corner of the barn and found Donny huddled in the corner. Dropping to her knees beside the young boy, she gently placed her hands on his small back.
Suddenly Donny burst into tears. Rayven reached out and drew the child to her, enfolding the boy in her arms. She rocked him as she sat on the hay covered floor, smoothing his hair, gently crooning to him.
"I'm sorry," Donny sniffed after a moment, obviously trying to get his emotions under control.
"What are you sorry about, honey? What's got you so upset?"
Donny just sobbed.
Rayven gently soothed the distraught boy and gradually Donny's weeping stopped. "Now tell me what's wrong." Rayven brushed back his blonde hair, patted his leg, trying to offer comfort to the boy.
"My Mom been staying in your room at night, hasn't she?"
Rayven went still. She couldn't lie to the boy. She thought Jaxon had told Donny they were together. Suddenly she felt awkward, embarrassed. "Why hadn't Jaxon told the boy? Was she ashamed" she thought. NO, Jaxx wasn't ashamed there had to be another reason. Maybe, she simple assumed Donny would understand.
"Yes she has," Rayven, said uncomfortably. Did the boy disapprove? Casting her mind around for something more to say, all Rayven could think about was where Jaxon was at that moment and why hadn't she told her son?
"Are you going to send me away?" Donny's said tearfully.
"Honey, why would I want to send you away? I love you. I thought we were good friends." Rayven asked gently.
"Bec . . . Because my dad hurt you and mom. Because of him you left Mom and she's been sad for a long time."
At that moment, Jaxon came running into the barn, tears rolling down her cheeks. She arrived a few minutes before and heard Donny's question. She knelt down in front of them placing her left hand on the boy's knee and her right on Rayven's shoulder.
"What are you talking about, honey?" Jaxon whispered. She had never talked about his dad or that time in her life. She didn't understand how the boy knew.
"When you would take me to Uncle Jaden's for the weekend I would hear him and Uncle Matt talking about how you needed to get away and work out the pain in your heart from what my dad did to you and Rayven. They said he was a bad man and that they were afraid for you. Afraid you wouldn't come back." He answered as he began to cry again. "If my dad was bad than I'm bad too and . . . and. . . you will send me away now since Rayven is back."
"Donny," Rayven said crying." We love you, honey. We're not going to send you away."
"No way, my boy. You are ours and always will be. You are not a bad boy. You don't have a bad bone in your body."
"But . . . but they said my Dad was bad. Said he did something really mean to you. They said I was a mistake." He couldn't continue as he was crying too hard.
Jaxon reached out and gathered her son into her arms. Tears continued to stream down her cheeks. "You listen to me, Donny boy." she said as she hugged him close. Feeling his small body shaking against her, she continued. "Rayven and I have loved each other since we were younger than you. We were meant to be together. I've told you this many times. Yes, something happened that caused us to be apart for a while, but now we are back together. I'm happy, honey. I love you and I love Rayven. We are all going to be a family. No one is going to take my boy from me. Never, do you understand?"
Donny turned his head so he could whisper into his mother's ear," How can Rayven love me when my dad hurt her? She's going to have her own kid. She won't want me too."
Rayven was listening with a heavy heart to the small boy's worries. When she heard the whispered question she knew she couldn't keep silent any longer. Moving as close as she could, she reached her hand out and gently stroked Donny's curly blonde hair. "You listen to me, my sweet, sweet boy. If . . . your dad wasn't a nice person that does not mean you won't be. I love you for who you are. I love you for your laughter, the joy you bring into my life. I've loved you since the first day we met when I looked into eyes the same color as my own. I want you to be a part of my life for a long, long time. I want you to be my son, too."
He turned to look at her with teary sad green eyes, wanting to believe, needing to believe.
"I love your mom, honey and I love you and yes I love our babies that will be born soon. My love is large enough for all of you. I had hoped you would love me and your sisters too." Rayven added.
"Sisters? He asked sounding surprised.
"Yes, my son." Jaxon responded. "You are going to be a big brother to two little girls."
"I always wanted to be a big brother. Can I have one sister and one brother?"
Jaxon and Rayven laughed gently. "No honey," Jaxon said. "We get what the good Lord gives us, which is two little girls."
He thought about that for a moment than smiled. "I think I'll like being a big brother." Looking shyly at Rayven he asked," Can I help name them?"
Rayven smiled, "Of course you can. That is one of the responsibilities of being a big brother."
"Another responsibility of being a big brother is letting people know where you're going," chastised Jaxon. "That's the first rule of wilderness traveling. You scared us to death."
"I'm sorry mom, I couldn't do it. I guess I'm still a little kid."
"You are just what we want you to be, honey. Don't rush growing up. It will come soon enough."
"I get to stay here with you and Mom and my sisters?"
"Of course, we wouldn't have it any other way."
"Can . . . can I call you momma?"
Rayven couldn't control the tears any longer. She reached out and Donny quickly moved into her arms. They hugged each other as tight as they could. Jaxon moved to surround them with her longer arms.
<<<
The day finally arrived for the hay crew to come. Early in the morning trucks and equipment began to arrive. Before long the entire yard and area in front of the barn was filled with dusty pickups, various pieces of equipment and over two-dozen men and women.
Rayven and Jaxon's relationship was steadily becoming stronger and more solid than it ever had been. Those that looked upon them could see the love they had for each other. The hesitant smiles were now in full bloom, when they looked at each other and the touches that tentatively existed before were now constant. There was an aurora about the two women that spoke of a love so deep that few had ever experienced it - let alone see it in action.
Jaxx's six friends, along with many others, were there as well. Rayven and Jaxon greeted their neighbors and friends. Jaxon was standing beside her, giving her clues as to who each family was and their importance in the area. Many had helped in past haying, and many were willing to again this year. The 'free' hay the rancher's received would save them money and help the cows during the winter months. They depended on the Sleepy Springs ranch for their survival.
A short time later, Rayven was alone in her yard, the dust still settling from the machinery and humans. She sighed and turned toward the house. She and some of the other women would be feeding this horde and she knew she had a full day work ahead of her.
<<<
Rayven climbed into the Explorer that was loaded with the midday meal, along with a case of beer, pop, and several jugs full of fresh cool water, and headed out to where the crew was located. She knew that this meal would be just enough to get the workers by until the barbecue that evening, even through it seemed enough to feed a small army. She stopped the pickup and watched the scene before her.
After the hay baler made neat work of the yellow green hay, it was left bailed in long rows in the fields. A platform truck would drive along between the rows, the men and women walking alongside heaving the 100 - 150 pound bales up onto the slow-moving truck. It was a long, arduous process, much harder than haying with a unit that baled and stacked all in one. Of course, they had one of those units, but it had broken down and the mechanic was still working on it.
There were storm clouds looming on the horizon, and Rayven suddenly understood why so many workers were turned loose on the fields. The hay had to be in before the rains hit or many of the ranchers would suffer come winter.
It took Jaxon a few minutes to notice Rayven had arrived, but when she did, she made a beeline in her direction. She was wearing an open long sleeved shirt with a tank top underneath, her hair was pulled back with a leather string and her face and arms were slick with sweat; her battered brown hat was jammed down over her eyes to keep the sun out. She peeled off her work gloves as she continued to walk toward the pickup, her face as dark as the storm clouds gathering in the distance.
Jaxon opened the passenger door and eased her jean-clad legs inside. The scent of hay and pure female filled the car as she turned, placed an arm over the back of the seat and stared at her lover and soul mate.
"Hi," Rayven said nervously. "She is so beautiful and sexy" thought the blonde.
"Hi, yourself," Jaxon said with a sexy smile. "Is everything alright? What are you doing out here in this hot weather?"
Rayven stared into her lover's sun tanned face, remembering vividly the feel of her mouth on hers, the brush of fingertips moving over her heated skin, the blaze of desire in her blue eyes. "Uh, I . . . I brought lunch and something cold to drink."
"Thank you," she murmured. Jaxon drew in a deep, slow breath and removed her hat, wiping her forearm over her brow. "God, it's hot out there."
"Don't you want a ice cold beer?" she asked, reaching for a frosty can.
The taller woman caught her lover's small wrist gently as she looked straight into green eyes.
"No, I don't want a beer, yet," she spoke softly. "You don't like the taste of beer if I remember correctly, do you?"
Rayven shook her head, feeling oddly breathless at the growing darkness in the blue eyes staring so intently at her. "I grew to like it over the years," she whispered.
Jaxon dropped her hat onto the floorboard and leaned toward the woman who held her heart. Ice blue eyes lowered to full, parted lips, she breathed, and "I'm going to kiss you first". Her hand went to the small throat easing the blonde head back against the seat as she bent closer. "It's all I've thought about since this morning."
Fingers went up to tangle in the thick black hair at the nape of Jaxon's neck, drawing her closer, eyes on soft sensuous lips. "I was hoping . . . you felt the same way," she whispered shakily.
"I do, sweetheart," she said huskily, her lips parting to take the smaller woman's.
Rayven felt the kiss like a volt of electricity shattering her body. She gasped involuntarily, clinging to the taller woman, her half-opened green eyes looking straight into sky blue ones.
The kiss was deep and powerful, "My God, you did want it as much as I did!" Jaxon whispered gruffly. Once more she crushed the mouth under hers, tongue darting possessively into the hot, wet mouth as her larger body pressed the smaller one back against the seat, mindful of their babies.
Rayven moaned at the hunger Jaxon was creating in her. Long fingers trailed down from her throat to her breasts, outlined by the sky blue maternity dress she was wearing. Those same fingers traced its low neckline with a caressing touch that caused the blonde's fingernails to dig into broad shoulders.
"I can't touch you like this," Jaxon whispered against the smaller woman's bruised lips.
"Jaxon!" she cried out, burying her face in the sweaty tanned neck of her lover while tears dampened her green eyes from the intense emotion the kiss had aroused. Her hands moved down to Jaxon's breasts, helplessly touching, feeling, connecting and savoring the feel of the hardened nipples against her small palms.
Long arms swallowed her, holding her hard and close while the smaller woman clung to muscular shoulders, trying desperately to get her own shattered emotions back under control. She felt an ache that seemed to go all the way to her very soul.
"I shouldn't have done that," Jaxon whispered in a small pink ear. "We were both too hungry for it."
Rayven drew back a little, her eyes wet with tears as they searched the blue eyes in front of her. "I feel strange," she whispered. "It's different between us now."
"I do too," Jaxon said quietly. "I burn in a way I never have. You weren't the only one who caught the fire, sweetheart. It's been so long and the feelings are so much more intense between us now."
Shyly Rayven looked into Jaxon's sky blue eyes and murmured, "I waited for you. I hoped and prayed that . . . I never . . . not with anyone."
Tears formed in the blue eyes and began to spill over, "I waited for you too. I tried to go on dates but I couldn't . . . it never seemed right. I felt like I was still connected to you and being with you was all I ever wanted. Nobody ever came close." She was so grateful she'd walked away from opportunities with other women whom she encountered along the way.
Rayven stared into the fiery blue depths of her lover's eyes helplessly. "I missed you, so very much," she whispered as tears threatened to fall from her eyes.
"I missed you, too." Jaxon brushed the blonde silky hair away from the small cheeks with a tender hand. "I thought I'd die when you left. I didn't know what to do. Some days I didn't think I could go on," she said, brushing her lips against soft skin. "But I did."
Rayven reached up to touch the perfect lips, the smooth tanned cheek. It was exciting to be able to touch her best friend and soul mate without waking to find it was only a dream. "I would have lost the other half of my soul if you had died."
"No more talk about dying. We are together, forever, nothing will come between us again." She leaned forward and kissed Rayven's mouth hard. "I need to get back. Are you and the babies going to be okay?"
"I'm going back up to the house; I still have some cooking to do for tonight's barbecue."
"Please, take it easy. Let the other women help."
"I will. Go on now."
Jaxon opened the door and got out. Rayven stared at the broad back as she moved away, holding up the frosty case of beer and the lunch basket to the obvious delight of her co-workers. Rayven started the pickup and drove away, thankful she was driving, not walking. Her legs felt like rubber at the moment.
Emily came over and picked up the pop and water that Jaxx had unloaded. She walked beside the dark haired woman. "You look pretty, umm . . . satisfied," she said with a smirk.
"I'm walking on clouds, Emily. I hoped and prayed for so many years and then that hope began to die. Now I have everything I've ever wanted." Jaxon stopped walking as a frown covered her face.
"What?" her friend asked.
With an angry expression on her beautifully tanned face, Jaxon exhaled explosively, "No one better ever come between us again. I'm afraid of what I might do Emily." She began to walk briskly to where the others were waiting.
"Yikes!" Emily replied as she also hurried towards the group waiting for their lunch.
<<<<
Under the cover of the tall pine trees on the eastside of Sleepy Springs Ranch, an extremely drunk Jim Gilmore watched through binoculars at the activity below. Tonight he would make his move. "We're going to have some fun, girls. I believe you are going to have an unexpected guest for dinner," he snickered.
<<<<
By the time evening came around they were ready to take the prepared food out to the picnic tables set up in the back yard. Since children weren't allowed in the fields while the haying was in process, several of the surrounding rancher's families were just arriving. It was time to sprawl in the grass and enjoy feeling good and tired for a job well done.
Rayven hoped there was enough food to feed everyone. Mr. and Mrs. Storeholt had butchered a cow the day before and brought plenty of steaks, ribs and hamburgers for everyone. Several grills were set up and men in small groups were surrounding them, arguing over the best way to barbecue.
Rayven knew the lunch she took to the crew was small in comparison to what some of these men usually ate. They would all be hungry and consume a massive amount of food. Rayven wanted to make sure that everyone left full and happy. It was the least she could do for the amount of work they had done for her.
It seemed like utter chaos when the last of the items was placed on the tables. It was hot, dusty and noisy; three things that were making Rayven cranky. She knew it was due to her pregnancy, but still it was annoying.
When Jaxon banged the metal trash can top to let everyone know that the meal was ready, several men and women came over to the picnic tables and served up heaping plates full. This process was repeated until everyone was taken care of.
Jaxon, along with Rayven and Donny, stood in front of everyone and thanked them for their assistance. Hoots and hollers were heard, along with a "let's eat" from John Gordon.
Rayven talked, laughed and asked a million questions. Everyone was willing and eager to tell her all she wanted to know and then some about the events surrounding the past eight years. She wanted to connect again with the area and what better way than to ask those that lived in Silver Lake.