Title: Chilled Invisibility
Author: Koda Graystone
Disclaimers: The characters and story are all mine.
Warnings: None needed
Feedback: Of any type is always welcome.
Email: kodagraystone@yahoo.com
Summary: In a world of hustle and bustle, people scurrying like mice in a maze. Have you ever felt invisible? This
is a story of one woman's journey of being found.
Type: Original
******
I walk into the crowded bar hoping to easy my battered soul. Sometimes I wonder if anyone knew I existed. The lights
are dim; the music loud and smoke fills the air. I walk slowly up to the bar and take the first stool I see. I
wait for what seems like an eternity before I am noticed. Reminds me of all the times I’ve wondered if I’m invisible.
I listen to the laughter of the crowd, the warmth that people are sharing, but my heart feels cold because I’m
not included. I used to have that special someone, feel the warmth of their love and care, but no more. I messed
up, made some mistakes, and couldn’t ease the pain. Forgiveness wasn’t an option. Now I live on the outside of
the glass windows forever looking inside. Wanting, needing to belong.
I dream of comfort, love and acceptance. I crave human communication and contact, thus why I am here tonight. The
dark shadows of my home were driving me insane. Now if only someone would reach out and want to be my friend.
With my drink in my hand I turn to look out over the crowd of dancing couples. I see smiling faces, hear laughter,
and begin to feel foolish for coming here. Self-pity consumes me and I fight the urge to get up and leave. Fifteen
more minutes I murmur to myself. I’ll wait until the clock strikes midnight to leave. After all it’s New Year Eve.
Why did this happen? How could I have let it happen? A foolish mistake is the answer that cost me my job, my lover
and my home. I was working too many hours trying to make enough to keep her satisfied. She wanted the best of everything
and I promised to provide it. She insisted I take the job working for her father at the construction site. It was
long hours and hard work but I loved her and thought it was worth the pain and exhaustion. Three years later here
I set with a room full of strangers on the eve of a new year.
Her dad sent me on a job in the next town, a late night, a warm body and three years down the drain. Forgiveness
wasn’t an option. She even kept the dog. I realized afterwards that I had received more warmth; love and understanding
from that one night stand than I had in the last two years we were together. I should have seen the signs long
before. Too many hours away from home working to provide my lover caused us to drift a part. There were other factors
involved, like the fact she was having an affair that I didn’t know about. I was her sugar momma while she played
house with someone else.
It’s been three months since I had that one night stand. I dream about her still. With my broken dreams and shattered
heart I moved to Dadeville and tried to find her, but to no avail. Her eyes were as green as freshly mowed grass
and her hair was as golden as sun streaked corn stocks. Her body was like Aphrodite’s. She was intelligent and
easy to talk with. She confided in me about her dreams, hopes and fears. She was my sweet Madelyn.
While I sat here feeling like a piece of furniture the clock was ticking away. Five minutes to midnight and I’ll
be on my way, back to my miserable silence and shadowy apartment. My heart sinks as I place my now empty glass
on the bar top and stand to leave this happy place.
As I ponder how to end my misery I feel a tingling warm sensation wash over me. It raised goose bumps on my arms.
Slowly I turn toward the sensation and I can only see her silhouette from the lack of light coming towards me.
Her eyes seem to glow, piecing the dim room to look directly into mine. I’ve been branded by her glowing light,
mesmerized by her smile. “My Madelyn,” I whispered fearing it may not be true. I am finally no longer invisible.
My entire being is shaking with anticipation, want and need. I’m holding my breath for fear of moving an inch for
my vision will surely disappear.
She is wearing the most revealing outfit I’ve ever seen. Her silky golden hair flows loose and free, over her shoulders
and glides down past her slim waist. She’s wearing the most beautiful dress that molds sensuously over every curve
of her gorgeous body. Piercing green eyes drill into mine, holding me prisoner. Searching my soul to its very depths,
I am noticed.
My whole body is shaking as I stand facing my past. “Madelyn?” I asked with my hand out to shake hers.
She bypasses my outstretched hand and wraps her arms around me. My face is buried in her warm neck. Her scent fills
my lungs. “I went to find you.” She whispers in my ear. “I found out what happened. I’m sorry.” She kisses my neck
before releasing her hold on me and taking a step back.
"You looked for me?” I smile. “Why?”
As we stare into each other’s eyes, the count down to midnight begins. All around us people are shouting. Slowly
the room fades away, the noises no longer exist, only she and I. She places the sweetest of kisses upon my lips.
“Come away with me.” She whispers.
I am no longer invisible. The once cold empty places of my soul are filled with warmth. This is my home.
She takes my hand. Such a simple gesture, but for me, it was a lifeline to a future of being noticed.
***
It was the twilight hour of the morning as I stand naked at the window staring at the millions of stars that
fill the night sky. It’s been ten years and I’m no longer invisible. I’m noticed, accepted and loved. As I looked
away from the window to my wife lying naked in the shadows fast asleep I cover my face with my hands and cry. Tears
stream down my face and neck as I swallow my sobs and shudder, so great and deep were the emotions that possessed
me.
It was the closeness, the acceptance I had with Madelyn that were causing all the tears. They were far from tears
of despair. They were tears of joy.
I walked to the bed where my wife lay sleeping, a tender smile on her face. I bend down and kissed her ever so
lightly on the lips and one exposed pretty breast. I lay down on the bed and curl as close to her as I can without
crawling into her skin. As I hold her ever so tenderly next to me I place a tender kiss on her forehead.
"Thank you for noticing me."
The end.