Tempus Fugit
By Mavis Applewater
For disclaimers see part one.
A special thank you goes out to my beta reader Mary.
Part Twelve 1967
The year was filled with firsts. The first heart transplant, the first Super Bowl, Thurgood Marshall became the first black man to sit on the U.S. Supreme Court, and for the first time, I accepted that Ginny and I were destined for nothing more than drifting in and out of one another’s lives. It was a turbulent time. There were race riots in Detroit, Florida, New Jersey and D.C., and despite our protests for the end of the war in Vietnam, the President seemed certain the solution was to throw more young men’s lives into the battle.
The Doors, Linda Rondstat and the Beatles filled our ears as we faced the times with defiance. Earlier in the year with Ginny’s permission I signed the Chevy over to my parents. It made sense since they drove the car more than I did. I never kept the car in the city. It didn’t make sense but since my legal address was Boston I was paying an enormous amount of money to insure the car. So the Cherry Mobile was passed to my parents who like me promised to keep it up and running until the day Ginny took it back. I don’t know what it was with me and the family. Hope certainly did spring eternal.
In the spring of that year I got a short letter from Ginny requesting that I forward her mail to an address in Santa Barbara. It wasn’t unusual for me to do that from time to time. It was the first time that the change in our little correspondence system lasted more than a month. It hit me hard. I guess I always expected her to come home. Now it seemed that she was putting down roots. I had to accept that where she chose to settle down was far away from me. More than anything I wanted Ginny to be happy. It just sucked that I wasn’t the person who could make that happen.
One afternoon Spencer, Evelyn and I were having lunch in my tiny office. Spencer and I had been discussing a case when Evelyn popped in to join us. Once the two of them got talking the conversation quickly turned to wedding plans. Listening to them was the first time I realized that planning a wedding was a huge deal. Spencer and Ron wanted a small simple ceremony. His parents and Gary wanted it to be a huge event. Evelyn and Wally’s parents were meddling constantly over where the upcoming nuptials should take place. Both families were competing for their religion to be the one that the young couple should adopt.
"And that is why we’re having a justice of the peace,” Spencer triumphantly concluded. "He was raised Catholic and I was raised Lutheran and neither of us are religious. A JP is the perfect solution.”
"We tried to get them to go that route,” Evelyn whimpered burying her face in her hands. "You would think they’d get a clue when my Rabbi and his Minster refused to perform the service because we’re marrying outside of our faith. I think it is a stalling tactic. They’re hoping that we’ll change our minds. It is so twisted. We love each other. His parents like me, mine like him still they can’t get past the different faith thing. They thought we were insane when we told them we’d raise our children in both faiths. It didn’t help matters when the Rabbi and Minster informed us that we couldn’t do that.”
"Won’t be easy,” I added my two cents to the pot. "I think Spencer is right. Neither of your houses of worship is going to bless your union. A civil ceremony is the only option left. I think that’s what my parents ended up doing.”
"What faith were you raised in?” Evelyn seemed to be pleading with me for some guidance.
"Neither really,” I drummed my pencil on the desk. "I know we were baptized but I’m not sure by which church. Mom did take us to services when we were really little. Somewhere along the line all of us just stopped going except for holidays. The split in their religions isn’t nearly as vast as what you and Wally are facing. Sorry that wasn’t helpful at all was it?”
"Better than what we’ve come up with,” Evelyn tried to smile. "Lately we’ve been considering hopping on the first plane to Vegas.”
"Now there’s an idea,” I almost jumped for joy. I loved the both of them dearly and would take great joy in celebrating the day with them. Alas they wanted me to be a member of the wedding party. Honestly being a bridesmaid sucked. Always has, always will. Look at the facts; you have to buy an overly expensive, hideous dress and matching shoes. Then you have to help plan the shower which is nothing more than coming up with a gift and playing ludicrous games. Then there was the obligatory dance with some usher who always assumed he is going to get lucky just because they paired you off with him.
"We’re not,” she swatted me. "You’re still a bridesmaid; get over it.”
"Crap,” I sneered recalling the horrid colors Evelyn had proposed for her wedding party. "I don’t care what anyone says you can’t cut down those dresses and wear them again.”
"It’s a fact,” Spencer agreed. "At least his parents like you. Ron’s parents hate me. More so after they found out that Ellen was the one who had introduced us.”
"Oh,” I grumbled. "That’s because his mother thinks I’m evil.”
"I kind of figured that out when I saw his prom picture,” Spencer smiled. "She cut you out of the picture. Why doesn’t she like you?”
"I’m a fallen woman and her son had the bad manners to stay friends with me,” I blew out feeling the sting of old wounds. Try as I may a part of me would never be able to bury the pain I endured during my final days in Cedar Hills. "It‘s kind of funky. Growing up everybody’s parents loved me. Sorry.” I cleared my throat and shook off the painful memories.
"I have to make tracks,” Evelyn folded up the remnants of her sandwich.
"Keep me posted and please rethink your color scheme,” I pleaded as she gathered up her belongings. "I don’t look good in pink.” Spencer was still laughing when Evelyn left. "Okay, Chuckles time to get to work. Do we have anything? Loretta said she’d be willing to drop the charges if we can bring her something to prove that Jorge is innocent. Did our favorite Detective screw up by any chance?”
"We got diddly,” Spencer growled. "I was hoping Jarworski stepped in it. Sadly no. Why didn’t we ever go after him?”
"The SJC was very clear that the facts of Ginny‘s case never come out,” I snarled tapping my pencil. "I hate that this guy is still carrying a badge.”
"My old man had some colorful expressions for cops like Jarworski,” Spencer grunted a scowl plastered firmly on her face. "If half the stuff DeMarco told me is the truth Jarworski should be in prison.”
"You never told me what he said.”
"Most of it is just his word,” Spencer slowly began clenching her jaw. "He wasn’t really in his right mind. He told me a lot of things that had nothing to do with Virginia’s case. The really sickening thing about it was he didn’t regret a thing. Not until he found himself withering away in that hospital bed trying to make a plea bargain with God for more time. All of a sudden he gives a shit. The biggest thing I learned was that everything that happened to Virginia was his doing.”
"What?” I demanded.
"His boss told him to solve the problem,” Spencer reluctantly continued. "He decided that the best way to end the problem with the troublesome twins was to get the problem twin out of the picture. The harsh prison sentence, keeping her away, keeping you away, the pay offs and everything else was his way of resolving the matter. He got her parents to agree by playing the queer card. Virginia was lost to them and Laura had a perfect record. They didn’t want to go along he finally wore them down. He used her relationship with you, claiming that your parents were going to file charges. He even went so far as to offer your parents a pay off. They told him what to do with it by using some very colorful expressions. He claimed that by the time he realized the wrong twin was the troublemaker he didn’t care. Someone was going to the lions and it wasn’t going to be him. Sutherland was so ecstatic that he managed to end the legal troubles for the Swenson family he promoted DeMarco.”
"Ginny was a career move?” I felt like throwing up.
"Yes,” Spencer confirmed with a dark sneer. "A big one. Screwing her over really paid off for him. He always thought because of her orientation she got what she deserved. Personally I’d like to think that by dying a slow and painful death DeMarco got what he deserved. He did pass on a wealth of dirty little secrets before he died. I’m the only one who knows. Pity I can’t use half of it to clean up the messes he made.”
"Quite a burden,” I noted thoughtfully. "It’s weird knowing the name of the one person who was responsible for altering so many lives. And now he’s dead.”
"I’m sure he is paying his penance in the after life,” Spencer surmised. "Now about Jorge. We need to prove he was nowhere near that street corner that night. Any ideas? Cause I’m running on empty. I know that you don’t want to go after the victim.”
"No, I don’t and neither does Jorge,” I stressed biting my lip. "Find out what you can. I’m not going to beat up on her in court, but I need to know why she’s so certain it was Jorge.”
"I’m on it.”
"Ellen,” Jennifer our ever diligent receptionist called out popping into my office just as Spencer was making her departure. "You have a visitor. She doesn’t have an appointment.” My heart began to race as I began to hope it was a certain tall blonde who had slipped out of my life last year. "A Miss Sandra Hewitt.”
"Sandy?” I sputtered as I stood. "Send her in.” I stood there waiting wondering why Sandy had shown up. I hadn’t seen or heard from her since she overdosed. Her last words still ringing in my ears. My jaw dropped when she entered my office. She had gained some much needed weight and for the first time in years her pupils weren‘t dilated. "Sandy? You look great.” I squealed bolting from behind my desk to capture her in a fierce hug.
"Wow, I wasn’t expecting this,” she laughed releasing me from the hug. "After what I said and did I was half expecting you to throw me out in the streets. Ellen, I’ve come here to apologize for everything I’ve done.”
"You don’t have to,” I cut her off guiding her towards the office.
"Oh but I do,” she corrected me. "All part of my recovery. Had a dickens of a time finding you. Those bozos you use to work for neglected to tell mom you don’t work for them any longer. I finally had to show up at the barber shop and pump your dad for info. Ellen you saved my life. I can never thank you enough. And over the years I used you, put you and everyone else in harms way. I never faced the damage I was causing. Not until the doctors at the clinic knocked some sense into me. I was a bitch and a half when I hit the clinic,” she wearily explained. "You picked a good place. They didn’t take any crap from me. Finally got my attention. For the first time since I was thirteen, I’m clean; I’m sober and happy to be alive. My mother and I are getting along. We’re selling the house in Cedar Hills and your mother is looking for something smaller for us. None of this wouldn’t have been possible if you hadn’t forced me to get my act together.”
"Wow,” I leaned back in my chair after listening to her. "You have a whole new life.”
"I have a life,” she corrected me. "Mom and I are finally close. I never thought that would be possible. It’s still one day at a time. Always will be for me. Oh that reminds me. Those yahoos over at Rockwell, Manning & Diamond led mom to believe that you were involved with our business. Hell, you were the reason she trusted the firm in the first place. Then they gave us the run around after you left last year. We had no idea that you weren’t with them any longer.”
"I wouldn’t have handled your legal matters,” I scowled not really surprised that they had misled the Hewitt family just to keep their retainer. "I’m a criminal litigator. Unless you or your mother gets busted you don’t need me.”
"Mom wants you,” Sandy stressed. "We are still dealing with Dad’s estate. We’re selling that white elephant in Cedar Hills and Debbie is retiring. Mom needs to take care of her. Does your firm handle things like that?”
"Tyler,” I happily supplied. It would have been unethical to ask them to leave my old firm. But since she asked it was okay. "I’ll introduce you before you leave. He’s young but damn good with handling money.”
"If he’s around why don’t we do it now?” She eagerly inquired. "I have to get going. Just one more thing, besides another I’m sorry for being such a major drag in the past, I need to make amends with everyone. Do you know how to get in touch with Ginny?”
"Not really,” I cleared my throat a familiar pain tugging at my heart. "She has a post office box here in town,” I explained quickly scribbling down the address. "She has been getting her mail forwarded from there.”
"Great.” She hugged me again before I led her off to meet with Tyler.
Later that day Spencer returned with good news. The victim wasn’t a victim but a scared teenager who had gotten into trouble. I placed a hasty call to Loretta and crossed my fingers praying that this time the system would work. It took another week before Loretta could get the truth out of the teenager. In the end Jorge got his life back and I felt really good. For only the second time in my career not only was my client innocent I proved it. The lack of money did nothing to quell the exhilarating feeling.
When I arrived at my parents for Thanksgiving that year I saw the duffle bag sitting in the living room. Knowing that Ginny had opted to stay with my parents before contacting me cemented things. She visited them every time she blew into town, but she only crashed with them first when there was someone special in her life. It was her way of informing me that when she stayed at my place there would be no bathing together, no kissing and no hanky panky of any kind. Talk about a buzz kill.
"Eleanore I didn’t know you were here?” Mom greeted me with a big hug.
"I see you have a houseguest.” I grimly noted.
"I’m fine thank you,” Mom groaned.
"I’m sorry Mom,” I smiled. "Happy Thanksgiving. How are you?”
"Now that all my kids are home I’m great,” she beamed guiding me into the kitchen. "Sit I’ll put on some coffee. You look like you haven’t slept in a week.”
"My case load has grown,” I confessed with a yawn looking at my watch disgusted that I was up so early on the first day off I’ve had in months. "So how long has she been here?”
"A couple of weeks,” Mom confided while scurrying about the kitchen.
"A couple of weeks?” I echoed miffed that she hadn’t picked up the phone to call me.
"She wanted to surprise you.” Mom quickly chastised me checking on her pots and pans.
"Let me help you.” I started to stand.
"Sit,” she sternly instructed me. "A wonder all in the kitchen you’re not. She really did want to surprise you.”
"Mom,” I slowly began after she set a cup of coffee down in front of me. "I understand. If she swung by here first it means she has a new friend. Hey where’s Sammy?” I threw out in an effort to change the subject.
"He and your father decided to give the Chevy a tune up and take it out for a spin,” Mom shook her head. "Men and cars I will never understand it.”
"Mom, you know that you’re the one who won’t let anyone drive the Chevy,” I snickered. "The Cherry Mobile is your baby. Don’t even try to lie about it.”
"It is very reliable,” Mom shrugged. "It’s a convertible for pity’s sake. And very sassy. You should see my clients drooling over it.”
I couldn’t argue with her logic. Every time the weather turned warm I just loved taking the Cherry Mobile out for a spin. For me it was never just the thrill of cruising around with the top down, I had so many memories tied to that car. "They are living in San Luis Obispo in one of those hippy vans,” Mom offered in a hushed tone disrupting my thoughts.
"And she says my apartment is too small,” I grunted sipping my coffee trying to picture Ginny living in a psychedelic VW Bus.
"Maybe if you got a bigger place?” Mom suggested her tone quickly alerting me to the fact that she was about to meddle.
"I like my place.” I grunted.
"Eleanore,” Mom began; I detected that she was full of steam and ready to lay into me. Thankfully Ginny chose that moment to make an appearance.
"You’re late.” She taunted me. I couldn’t help smiling at the comment. I stood and wrapped her up in a big hug. I could have simply melted into that hug. When she pulled away suddenly I remembered that she was spoken for.
"So how long are you staying?” I asked as she helped herself to a cup of coffee. I was surprised when Mom spun around and glared at me.
"Not long,” Ginny shrugged as we sat down at the kitchen table. "I need to start heading home soon.”
‘Home?’ Now that hurt. "Oh?” I nodded trying my level best to sound blasé. I shrank back noticing my mother’s eyes boring into me while she lurked behind Ginny. I blew out a sigh of relief when the telephone rang and Mom was forced to answer it. "So how are things going?” I asked trying to make conversation.
"Good,” Ginny nodded sipping her coffee. "Still not use to the time change. Oh and I’m starting college in the fall.”
"Cool.” I smiled brightly. It was hard not to be happy for her. For the first time in ten years she had a place to call home, a future to look forward to, and someone special in her life.
"Yeah it was much easier to get in after I discovered that I am no longer considered a felon,” she laughed. "I knew you had been working on things. But just how did you pull it off?”
"Oh that was nothing,” I lied. "I’d go into to detail but what it boils down to is a lot of legal jargon which basically means that you had grounds for an appeal.”
"Ginny telephone,” Mom called out as she rejoined us. Ginny made a quick departure. Suddenly I was left squirming in my seat while my mother glared at me.
"What?” I finally barked out.
"Is that how you greet her?” Mom was flabbergasted.
"With a hug?” I questioned not getting the gist of what she was going for. "You hug her too.”
"Yes and I say hello, nice to see you,” Mom snapped. "How long are you staying? Please tell me that isn’t the way you greet her every time you see her?”
"Uhm,” I cleared my throat my eyes darting around suddenly feeling like I was about to be grounded.
"Eleanore no wonder she never stays,” Mom huffed. "How long are you staying is the way you greet a red headed stepchild at a family picnic not someone that you care about.”
"Mom!” I coughed my jaw hanging open.
"I swear you are going to end up an old woman living in that closet you call an apartment with four hundred cats,” Mom continued her tirade. "Don’t you want to be in a relationship? I understand that you kids are all into this peace and free love crap, but enough is enough. If you don’t get off the stick young lady,”
"Sammy!” I cried out when Dad and my brother entered the kitchen. I was never so happy to see the little booger in my whole life. Then again he wasn’t so little anymore. My little brother was a college man. "How is school?”
"Great,” Sammy smiled giving me a quick hug. "I’m already checking out Grad schools.”
"My son the zoologist,” Dad beamed.
"That’s a long way off.” Sammy quickly interjected.
"Who is Ginny on the phone with?” Dad grunted. "Not that Songbird again?”
"Who else?” Mom sighed wearily.
"Songbird?” I sputtered.
"Hey Sis how about I show you the work Dad and I did on the Cherry... I mean the Chevy?” Sammy made a quick save grabbing my hand. When we passed through the living room I didn’t miss the way Ginny was keeping her voice down or the tension that loomed over her. All I heard was whoever she was talking to was asking about the bread, that it would still be a couple of years and yes I’m staying with her. I wish I could have heard more but that just would have been rude.
"Thanks for saving me,” I blew out once we were safely hidden in the garage.
"What was Mom’s trip this time?” He asked lighting a cigarette and offering one to me. I accepted the offer needing a little something to help chill me out.
"She was giving me relationship advice,” I blew out still not believing it. "According to Mom I’m going to end up an old maid with a lot of cats.”
"What a drag.” He laughed before turning serious. "It brings her down. The two of you not hooking up again. You know?”
"No I don’t know,” I fussed. "She’s with someone else. We live in different worlds. Why does Mom think we’ll end up together?”
"I always thought you guys would.” He offered with a sad smile.
"Life handed us the short end of the stick,” I tried to explain. "Even if Ginny hadn’t gone to jail we were already on different paths. She would have gone off to Stanford and I still would have gone to Smith.”
"I don’t think this girl makes her happy,” he dryly stated. "I mean I’ve only been home for a couple of days but every time they talk on the phone they end up arguing.”
"Really?” I questioned truly curious.
"Yeah mostly about money and Ginny staying with you,” he grunted. "I have a feeling that Ginny would have bolted to Boston sooner, but her old lady is dead set against her crashing at your pad.”
"Can’t blame her,” I surmised snubbing out my smoke. "I’m the old girlfriend, and even if Ginny and I haven’t managed to hook up in a happily ever after way we still hook up if you get my drift.”
"Man you are so lucky.” He sighed appreciatively. "She was my first crush.”
"Mine too.” I gloated then the smile slipped away and now she had finally done what she had always told me to do. Ginny had moved on.
"Is this a private party?” Ginny chimed sneaking into the garage.
"I was just heading back,” Sammy quickly excused himself.
"So?” I lamely offered rocking back and forth on my heels.
"So.” She echoed.
"What’s her name?” I asked not really caring.
"Sparrow,” she smiled slightly. "We’ve been together since last summer.”
"Sparrow?” I sputtered.
"That is her chosen name,” Ginny asserted. "Uhm, would you mind if I crashed with you for a couple of days? I love staying with your folks but I need a little time in the city.”
"How is Sparrow going to feel about that?” I asked already knowing the answer.
"She hates it,” Ginny dryly answered. "Look I know... Ellen I want to spend time with you. Just because we’re not going to hit the sheets together I always thought that what we shared was more than that.”
"We do,” I tenderly reassured her. "I’m taking the train home tonight why don’t you join me? I can handle the cold showers.”
"Yeah sorry about that,” she smirked. "As tempting as it is and as fun as it is I’m in a relationship. Like you said a long time ago I want more out of life than a little fun.”
"Ouch.” I shrank back feeling the sting of her words.
"I’m sorry I’m not trying to hurt you. That is the last thing I would do,” she apologized. "I just have been wondering for a long time now when you stopped wanting that?”
"I haven’t,” I snapped wondering if this was gang up on Ellen day. "I haven’t,” I furiously repeated. "I want a relationship it just hasn’t been in the cards.”
"I just want you to be happy,” she tried to explain.
"And I just want you,” I paused feeling my chest constrict. That was it. After all these years I still wanted her and I was still too chicken shit to tell her. Not that it would have mattered at that point in time. She was after all in a relationship "I just want you to be happy.”
She seemed to believe me and after a quick and awkward hug we rejoined the family. We shared a great meal. Loaded down with the leftovers Mom insisted we take we took the train back to Boston. Ginny did ask me an odd question; she wanted to know if my legal expertise extended to financial matters. I informed her that it didn’t but Tyler, who worked at my firm, could handle whatever problem she had. I never asked what she needed help with, but it must have been a bugger since it took longer than expected for Tyler to clear up the situation.
Secretly I was thrilled that it took some time to resolve the matter. I got to spend time with Ginny; something that I knew wasn’t going to exist in our future. Still we had a ball. In or out of the bedroom Ginny and I really meshed. The only rough patches were sleeping next to her night after night and not being allowed to touch her, and then there was overhearing snippets of her chats on the telephone with Sparrow. I had the sinking feeling that Sammy was right. Ginny wasn’t really happy with Sparrow and they fought a lot about money. Then again I was biased not just because Ginny had been my first love, but anytime I had the misfortune of being the one who answered the telephone when Sparrow called she was out and out snotty to me. I had to constantly remind myself that if I was in Sparrow’s Birkenstocks I might forget my manners too.
When it was time for Ginny to leave she was furious that I had bought her a plane ticket. "I’m not letting you hitch,” I stressed. "Ginny you wanted to leave weeks ago. If I was waiting for,” I paused stopping myself from saying you. "If I was waiting for my girlfriend to come home I’d want her to make the trip as short as possible. Take the ticket in thirteen hours you’ll be home.”
"I hate it when you’re logical.” She grumbled.
‘And I hate it when you leave.’ I silently cried.
"I’ll pay you back,” she promised.
"I don’t care about the money,” I chided her. "If money meant anything to me I wouldn’t be slaving away at a law firm where most of the clients pay us in trade. Granted Mrs. Steiner’s muffins are to die for.”
"I had some,” she smiled. "And you’re right that woman should open a bakery.” Then she grew strangely quiet and just looked at me. "Why is it every time I leave I feel like none of the women in Boston are safe?” She finally broke the silence teasing me. Despite the jovial tone there was sadness in her eyes. "I just wonder what happened to that sweet innocent pom-pom girl who... Who won me over?”
"Her girlfriend got sent up the river.” I answered not even bothering to hide the sadness I felt. We just stood there looking into one another’s eyes the silence was stifling. I felt like we both had something to say yet the words never came. "So do you really live in VW Bus? Cause I can’t picture it.”
"We do,” she answered with a halfhearted smile.
"You in a small space?”
"It gets to me sometimes,” she confessed. "But we have this friend who lives up in Santa Barbara. Whenever we need to get our mail or make a phone call we head up there.” I stood mentally tallying how many times she added the word we to her sentence. "You never asked about what I needed help with. Why not?” She threw in out of the blue.
"It was a financial matter,” I slowly responded. "I couldn’t help with it ergo none of my business. I figure if you wanted me to know you’d tell me.” Once again we just stood there. She was holding her duffle bag and I was dying inside. "I should call a taxi for us.” I blurted out needing to stop the pain that was growing inside of me. It was like pulling off a band aid; the quicker the better.
"I’ll go it alone,” she said slinging the bag over her shoulder. "I hate goodbyes.”
"Really?” I sighed thinking that for someone who hated saying goodbye she always seemed to be doing it. For the first time in years we didn’t even hug she just waved and walked out the door.
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