Gears Heads Doing
Disclaimer: The characters are a figment of my sick and demented
Sex: Oooohhh yeah!
Violence and foul language: What can I say, I have a gutter mouth.
No animals were harmed in this story. Jessica has her ways of paybacks, namely
Any complaints or hate mail. E-mail Hecate3366@aol.com
Thanks to Lesia and Ri for the torture I put them through.
The wind whistled through the
open back door chilling the kitchen even more than it already was. Morigan tiptoed
across the cold tile floor to the coffeepot, shivering the entire time it took
to prepare the coffee maker. She was about to close the door when Poni came stumbling
in with her bare arms loaded down with firewood.
"Dumb stupid son of a bitchin
lazy ass fucking man! Outta cut his tiny dick off!"
"Who are you talking about?"
"That little bastard Steve!
I asked him ta bring some wood up on the deck last night and ya know where he
put it? NO WHERE! I had ta go out ta the woodshed. Bastard!"
Poni dropped the wood alongside the wood burning stove. Standing with her hands
planted on her hips, her camel color eyes blazing with bodily harm.
"Ya know how fucking cold
it is out there?"
"Uhhhmmm, really cold?"
"Try cold enough that my
nipple rings are flipped up and my tits are frost bit. Wanna see?"
"Nahhh Pons, that's OK I
Morigan looked at Poni standing
in front of her with her knee high black engineer boots, white men's BVD's and
a ragged T-Top T-shirt. Her long dark hair looked like wild animals had used it
for nesting in and may very well still be in there somewhere.
"Why were you outside half
naked any way?"
"I lost a bet OK? Ya happy?
Now I gotta cook breakfast, of all the things!"
Poni stomped off to the kitchen
mumbling to herself. Shaking her head at her friends shitty mood, Morigan raced
up the stairs to her and Mike's room. Jumping under the covers she snuggled up
against her lovers warm body.
"By the Gods! Ya trying ta
give me frost bite?" Mike yelped. "Where have you been outside?"
Morigan mumbled from her warm
"In the kitchen. And I'm
not going down there alone either. Poni's PMSing and what's worse is she's cooking!"
"Ohhh noooo, that means we
get blue food." Mike sighed into her pillow.
"Yep Grumpy Smurf is at it."
After half an hour of snuggling
they decided that they couldn't hide all day in bed. Morigan had classes to teach
and Mike had Poni's transmission to put back in her tow truck. But knowing that
Poni was pissed about something she knew the tranny would be the one to suffer.
With Poni's Herculean strength she would probably flip her truck on it's side
to get the tranny in and make it's installation go as fast as she could so that
she could get back on the road to terrorize the Shepardstown citizens.
sat at the table with a plate full of blue pancakes, muffin and hash browns. While
Poni slung scrambled eggs onto a plate with hash browns and bacon for Morigan
and herself. When she saw Mike and evil grin crossed her face for a brief second
or two. She filled a plate from the last of the frying pans and placed it in front
"Here ya go Mike, corned
beef kennel ration with a little zap to it."
Mike looked at the plate then
at Poni with a curious eye. "Zap?"
"Yep, I put some peppers
and onions in it. Ya know extra flavoring."
Poni took her seat and watched
Mike eat her hash. The whole time she was hiding an evil grin behind her hand
but couldn't hide the raised eyebrow or twinkle in her eye.
"How's it Mikey?"
"It's different but good."
Morigan caught the looks Poni
was giving Mike and knew that she was up to something and that most likely Mike
was the reason that she had lost her bet. Within seconds of Mike taking a drink
of her chocolate milk her face turned a beet red, sweat was running down her face
to soak into her T-shirt while tears filled her eyes.
"DRAKE!?!" Mike gasped
as her mouth burned like a Forrest fire.
"What?" Giving her most
'wasn't me look'.
"You lying, bow legged, sheep
humping Barney loving Amazon!"
"Hey I'm not a sheep!"
"Sorry." Fanning her
mouth Mike glared at Poni. "Whatcha put in here?" She pushed her plate
across the table over to a grinning Poni. Then Mike grabbed her glass and drained
the last of her C-Milk.
"Fucking mother of Zeus!"
She yelled as flames practically shot out of her nose and mouth. Morigan sat as
her lover turned ten shades of red. Stacey gave her usual look of "Don't
ask me I have no idea." And Drake "The Poni" Poninger a look of
pure world dominance.
Morigan cleared her throat to
keep from laughing. "Poni, tell me about this bet you lost last night."
"Ohhh that. It's Mikes fault!
One more war cry ta make the stuff on the shelf jump and I woulda won! But all
we heard was NOTHIN!"
Morigan's face was a crimson color
but nothing to her lovers who now had her mouth under the faucet in the sink.
"So what's in the hash?"
"Oh that." Poni gave
her a toothy grin. "Whatsabe, wannabe, wheresabe...somethin like that?"
Shrugging her shoulders she went back to eating.
Yeah, that's it. Wantsomebe!"
"You put Asian mustard in
Mikes hash?" A grin briefly spread across Morigan's face then disappeared.
Mike returned to her seat with
slices of bread that she was stuffing into her mouth. Dark brows drawn deep over
her crystal blue teary eyes. With her mouth stuffed she mumbled "Eat it!"
and pointed to her plate full of hash. Poni's mouth dropped open at the thought
of self poisoning.
"Nahhh ahhhh! It's HOT!"
Mike started to get up out of
her chair when Poni decided that the poisoning would be less painful than what
Mike would do to her. Hesitating at first she then took a fork full and started
chewing slowly. Her brow raised as she chewed. Pushing her plate over to Mike
she finished the plate of hash then went to the stove for more.
"Ain't fucking fair!"
In record time Mike and Poni had
her truck back together and Poni was on her way to road ragedom. She was on her
way to Fairfax Virginia to pick up a car that someone had called about them picking
up and fixing. She would be gone most of the day which left Mike and Stacey to
try and get the 3 cars they had in the garage done.
"GET THE HELL OUTTA MY WAY!!!
Yuppie son of a bitch! I outta squash your and your damn beemer!
Traffic was jam packed on Rt.
28 at 12:30PM. Poni was jumping from lane to lane trying to get ahead of the commuters
that were on their lunch hour, she was looking at another 45 minutes of travel
time to go 15 miles to pick up the car they had been called about the day before.
Finally she made it to the parking lot hooked the car up and was on her way home.
But decided to stop at Foodlion in Sterling to pick up some steaks and beer for
supper. Standing in line in front of her is a woman dressed like she should be
at Bloomingdales, Poni mumbles under her breath. "This is the express lane
and a full cart does not qualify as 20 items or less, move your scrawny ass outta
the way so I can get home to my wife." The woman looks over her shoulder
into flaming eyes and decides not to say a word in fear that her life would be
extinguished like a candle. Poni hears snickering come from behind her and turns
to look into smiling green eyes.
"Gotta love it, rich bitches
thinkin they own the world. Old mans probably at the office banging his secretary
and she's here gettin her Chablis ta get wasted on so she has an excuse not ta
have sex with em tonight." The woman with the green eyes said.
Poni gave her a lopsided grin
then placed her stuff on the belt. After paying for her items she was on her way
out the door when someone bumped into her from behind.
"Sorry about that."
"No problem." Replied
Poni as she went out the door to her tow truck. Passing every vehicle on Rt. 7
at 90 miles an hour with a Dodge Lumina dragging behind caught the attention of
a Virginia State Cop real quick. Before she knew it he was cutting in front of
her and pointing for her to pull over. Poni groaned at the thought of having to
explain to Mike about getting a ticket and that it would be for reckless driving
and numerous other offenses knowing her luck with an authority figure.
"Ma'am I need your Drivers
License, registration and proof of insurance."
The officer said as he stood at an angle to the open door of her Tow truck.
Poni reached into her back pocket for her wallet, then searched the seat, glove
box, and floor and finally had to admit to the officer that she couldn't find
"Can you step out of the
vehicle ma'am, then I'll need you to walk in front of me to my car."
The Cop almost fell over when
Poni got out and stood over him by a good two inches and out weighed him by 25
lb. He was a little unnerved by the size of her arms and knew that she could tear
him apart with out breaking a sweat. Poni sat in the back of the cruiser while
the Cop ran what information she had provided to him.
Ma'am do you know that you're
driving on an expired license and that you have numerous unpaid tickets?"
"No Sir, I didn't."
"Miss Poninger I have to
take you into the station, I'll have someone tow the truck to the impound lot.
You can call someone from the station to come and get the truck, but you will
have to stay until your brought before the Judge."
Poni dropped her head and rubbed
her face with her hands. "Stacey's gonna kill me." She mumbled. "OK,
Poni stood in front of the judge
hoping to the Gods that he would let her go without a problem. However, her luck
had run out this time.
"Miss Poninger, I am looking
at a printout of all your violations for the last year. 9 speeding tickets, numerous
moving violations where red lights seemed to be of no concern to you and now today
doing 90mph in a 55mph zone, no license, registration or proof of insurance. Not
to mention that your license is expired."
"Judge, I had all that with
me when I left Foodlion. I think I got ripped off when I was leaving the store."
"Right, happens all the time.
Miss Poninger I'm holding you for 72 hours, which is the time it will take for
the State of West Virginia to send this court a copy of your Drivers License.
Bailiff will you escort Miss Poninger to the holding cell?"
"Son of a bitch! I'm a dead
woman, she's gonna kill me!" She mumbled as she was lead to a holding cell.
A few hours later a tall black Policewoman brought her a cordless phone so that
she could make her phone call. It rang fifteen times and no one picked up, and
the answering machine didn't come on. "Fuck! Can I try later, no ones home?"
"I'll come back later and
you can try again." The officer told her.
Poni sat on the concrete slab
that was suppose to be her bed for the next 72hours trying to remember when the
last time she had her wallet and what she was going to tell Stacey when she got
a hold of her. She was brought out of her thoughts by loud yelling coming from
the processing area. An hour later the same officer that had brought her the phone
came back but this time with a woman in handcuffs who was struggling the whole
way to the holding cell.
"Ya butch bitch, ya like
it rough don't ya?"
"Keep your mouth shut or
you will be put down in the male holding area, now get in there and shut up!"
Poni covered her mouth to hide
the grin and to keep from busting out with laughter.
"Nazi Bull Dyke! I outta
rip your head off and feed it ta my dog!" The woman struggled with her hands
still cuffed behind her back. "Fucking bitch, I always get harassed in this
Poni just sat where she was staring
at the women fighting the cuffs.
"Hey I know you don't I?"
"Uuuhhmm.. Nope don't think
Then it hit her. "I saw you
in Foodlion today."
"Must be a look alike, ya
know they say we all have one."
Just then the Officer stepped
in front of the cell. "Miss Poninger?"
Two voices answered. "What."
Two sets of eyes stared at each other for a brief second. "I'm Drake Poninger,
I have no idea who she is."
'Well it's you that I want if
you still want to make a phone call?"
"Ooohh yeah right."
Poni took the phone and tried once again to try and get hold of someone at home.
Again there was no answer. "Son of a bitch, where are they!?!"
The Officer then looked at the
other woman in the cell. "Your next."
"Yeah and how the hell am
I suppose ta make a phone call if my hands are cuffed behind me ya stupid bitch?"
The officers brown eyes bore into
the other women's. "You just lost your chance Poninger, every time you're
in here your mouth keeps you longer than necessary. Now you can sit and rot until
the judge comes for you."
Poni was flattened at the mention
of the women's last name. "What's your real last name and not the one off
of MY drivers license. Cuz now I know that you're the one who lifted my wallet
at Food Lion!"
The woman stood at 5'8" her long chestnut color hair was spiked on top and
shaved on the sides. Her eyes were the color of Morigan's but with a hostility
there that could peel paint. Poni was at eye level with her and noticed that her
nose had been broken numerous times and made a couple of turns before it ended.
"Not that it's any of your
business but that's my real name. And it wasn't lifting your wallet that got me
in here. I have a residence here and I just so happened ta forget ta come back.
Why are ya here?"
"I seemed ta forget ta get
a new drivers license but then how was I ta know it was bad since it was in your
Poni pushed the woman in her chest
hard enough to push her against the bars. She pressed in close that they were
nose to nose. "I outta beat the shit outta you for snagging my wallet."
"Go ahead if ya think your
Before Poni knew what happened
she was seeing stars float before her eyes. Grabbing her nose she felt the blood
seeping between her fingers. Her temper got the better of her and she went ballistic!
She had no idea how, but the other woman had gotten one cuff off and was using
the other like a flail. Poni launched herself knocking the woman back and down
onto the floor where they punched and kicked each other until Officers came to
break it up. They found themselves handcuffed to opposite sides of the cell where
they glared at each other.
"You still fight like a pussy
"Yeah well you're the one who taught me, ya Amazon bull dyke!"
The women grinned at each other
then started laughing.
"So how's Uncle Charlie?"
"She's OK, she's gonna be
real pissed when I have ta call her though. Especially when she hears that I kinda
broke out and got picked up with a stolen car." Jack wiggled her eyebrows.
"So I hear that you had one to."
The car ya had on your truck was
stolen, that's why they're holding ya. Not cuz of the speeding, Hell if that was
the case the place would be packed!"
"But the Judge said!"
"Yeah yeah, their way of
keeping ya from calling your contact. So who ya snagging cars for? I could use
a good connection when I get out."
"But I'm not! We were called
and they wanted us ta pick the car up and tow it to our garage and fix it."
"Gotta name, I could really
use the job."
"There's a big misunderstanding
going on here and I don't like it."
It was 9PM and Stacey was worried,
Poni should have been home hours ago. She had tried to reach her on the truck
radio and her cell phone but then found her cell phone laying on their dresser.
She gave up her brave front and went into Mike and Morigan's bedroom. As soon
as she walked through their door Mike was on her feet and wrapping her arms around
"Still no answer?"
Stacey shook her head then buried
it in her friends shoulder. The sobs over took her and if not for Mike holding
her up she would have collapsed onto the floor. Mike looked to Morigan who immediately
took her place to comfort their friend.
"I'm gonna make a few phone
calls, I'll be back in a few minutes."
Mike went down the hall to the
room that her brother Steve was staying in. She pounded on the door then pushed
it open to find him sitting at his computer.
"Can ya crack into the Police
files and check for Poni while I call all the hospitals?"
"Sure no prob, she's still
not home huh?"
"Nope and we're all worried."
"If I get a hit I'll yell."
"Thanks Steve, I'll be downstairs
in the office."
Morigan sat with a still sobbing
Stacey on her and Mike's bed.
"She'll be all right, you
"In twenty years we have
never not known where the other was at. She would have called!" Worn out
from crying she fell asleep in Morigan's arms. A half-hour later Mike came running
into their room.
"Get dressed we gotta go!"
"Where?" Morigan asked.
"Fairfax jail, they have
Poni under arrest for car theft."
"Car theft? What car?"
"The one she went ta pick
up, it was stolen."
Stacey awoke from her sleep to
catch the last of the conversation.
"We're gonna go get her now,
before she ends up wearing an orange jumpsuit with numbers across her back."
"Oooohhh noooo, she didn't."
Mike raised her eyebrow at her. "I'll kill her, I swear ta the Gods I'll
"Easy Stace." Mike struggled
while putting on her Levi's. "That damn car she went ta get was already stolen,
I'll explain on the way let's go get your Jailbird wife."
They made it to Fairfax in a little
over an hour. Mike was arguing with the desk sergeant, she was very close to becoming
Poni's cellmate when Jake walked in. Grabbing Mike by her arm he propelled her
to the side and away from a jail sentence of her very own.
"Let me handle this OK?"
"Get her outta there!"
"I will but you have to calm
down, now go over there to Morigan and Stacey and let me do my job."
"OK, but you had better get
her out or I'm sending Stace home with you!"
"So Jack where ya been for
the last 25 years? The last I heard was ya were in Texas."
"I was, up until last year,
got tired of running from the Texas Rangers...well, except for one." She
grinned at her cousin. Convict and Cop don't mix to well, but ya do get ta see
each other on the job a lot."
"Ever think of getting a
job that doesn't end ya up behind bars?"
"Where would the fun be?
I tried but I GOT BORED! And just went back ta doing what I'm good at. What about
"Ohhh I work with Mike fixing
cars and stuff, we make good money and we make our own hours and stuff."
"You still hang around with
Mike? Gods it's been almost 30 some years!"
Poni was about to comment when
the black female Officer came and got Jack.
"Come on Poninger, your bail
has been posted. You better leave now before they decide to keep you forever."
The Officer unlocked the cuffs
on both of them and escorted Jack out of the cell.
"Hey Drake, I'll give ya
a call in a couple of days. Maybe we can all get together and talk about all the
trouble we caused Ma." She grinned as she walked out of the cell.
"All right Jack, spill your
guts about what you found out in there about the car." The black Officer
"Nothin, she didn't steal
the car. She's my cousin and I know damn well she's no thief. But I may be able
ta find out who is behind all this if I hang around with her. But ya gotta tell
the dumbass brass ta stay off my ass."
"I'll see what I can do,
but you have ta come through on this or you're in trouble from way up the line."
"OK gotcha, I'll be in touch...and Oink stay away from the Krispe Kremes,
they'll kill ya."
"Fuck you Jack, no get the
hell outta here."
Poni was brought from her cell
to the front of the station where everyone was waiting. The minute Stacey saw
her she broke down in tears. Grabbing Poni around her neck she held on for dear
life. "I outta beat the shit outta you for making me worry so much! Why didn't
"I did! But I got no answer
every time I called and the damn machine ain't working again. Come on lets go
"Baby ducky, ahhh what happen
ta your nose?" Stacey asked.
"Ohhh uuhhmmm, I ran in ta
"Yep, of all the places ta
run in ta family huh?"
As they were all heading down
Rt. 28 Mikes headlights went across a figure walking down the road.
"Look at that dumbass, good
place ta get run over!" Mike replied as they went past. Poni glanced out
the back window and caught a glimpse of a familiar face.
"Just stop the truck!"
Poni was out of the truck before
the wheels even stopped moving. She took off down the edge of the road towards
the walking figure.
"What the hell is she doing?"
The next thing they knew Poni
was squeezing back into the truck along with a new passenger.
"Hey ya Mike, how ya doing?"
"For the love of Gods, Jack
you asshole! Damn you sure have gotten ugly in all these years!" Mike pointed
at her black eye and split lip.
"Ohh that, got that in Jail."
"Let me guess, Poni?"
"Damn your good. So Mike,
who's the blond latched on ta ya?"
"Sorry, Jack this is my wife
Morigan. Morigan that's Jack Poninger, Poni's black sheep cousin and missing for
the last 30 some odd years!"
Poni leaned forward towards Mike
with a puppy dog look on her face.
"I told her she could stay
with us for a while, and where the hell is my truck!?!"
"Steve picked it up, he said
he'll see us at home."
"That little Bastard better
not hurt my truck!"
"So tell me about Jack, was
she in on the Amazon war parties you guys use to have?" Morigan asked.
Mike rolled over on top of Morigan and brought their foreheads together.
"Nope, her Aunt moved ta
Texas when we were all little, she's five years older than us. So we kinda didn't
travel in the same path. And Ma prays every day for that."
"Jack has sticky fingers,
if it's not nailed down it's in her pocket."
"Ohhh great! Should we start
locking stuff up now?"
"Nah, but I'd like ta lock
you up for say 3 or 4 hours."
"I think that could be arranged."
Mike whipped the covers up over
their heads and all that could be heard was laughing coming from underneath. Then
a loud thump when they rolled off onto the floor. But nothing matched the banging
on the wall coming from Poni and Stacey's bedroom.
Poni was leaning over Stacey who
had her legs were wrapped around her waist. Sweat dripped off of Poni's chin to
drip onto Stacey's chest every time she pushed into her. The headboard kept rhythm
with them as it banged into the wall.
"Oooohhh Gods Ducky!"
Poni leaned forward to capture
Stacey's mouth for a long kiss. Pulling away she nipped at her wife's neck with
her teeth, bringing her closer to that pinnacle. Stacey raised up to wrap herself
completely around Poni, digging her nails into Poni's back she went over the edge
screaming out loud enough to shatter the windows. Thrusting her hips into Poni
one last time, she pushed her over the same edge. She screamed out Stacey's name
then they heard a snap like a giant rubber band and both let out a scream that
brought Mike and Morigan charging into their room.
"Are you guys all right?"
Mike asked from the doorway. Poni groaned from where she had collapsed on top
of Stacey. Morigan fearing that something was wrong ran under Mikes arm to the
side of their bed. She pushed Poni's sweat soaked hair out of her eyes. "Drake
are you OK?" One eye opened to look at her.
around under the blankets she gasped causing Morigan to flinch and Stacey to bust
out laughing. Mike stood with her dark eyebrow hidden in her hairline. Poni rolled
of off Stacey and reached out from under the cover to grab Morigan's hand and
place something in it.
Morigan took one look at what
Poni handed her, yelled and threw it at Mike who had grabbed it in midair.
"Eeewww, Drake that's gross!"
Mike flung it behind her and scared the hell out of Jack when it hit her in the
"For the love of Gods! You
sick Bitches!" Picking it up, Jack examined the new weapon dangling from
her hand. "Guys, next time buy a leather harness. This rubber shit breaks
all the time. But the two headed thing is a good idea." With that she tossed
it back at them, grinned and walked back to her room. Stacey was still laughing
at the look on Morigan's face.
"I swear you two will give
me gray hair!" Morigan growled.
Poni flipped the covers down then
looked back over her shoulder at the bright red stripe that went across her ass.
"Look at that will ya. Just
Stacey was going into convulsions
at the look on Morigan's shocked face. She just shook her head then ducked back
under Mike's arm.
"Never a dull moment!"
She said on her way back to their room.
"Pons, ya should look in
a mirror if ya think your ass looks bad." Mike grinned at her bewildered
look then left.
"Baby, what's wrong with
"Ducky, you look like a demented
"Ohhh geez, I forgot! Is
it really bad?"
"Nahhh, don't worry about
it. I still love you."
Morigan snuggled up against Mike's
side, resting her head on her strong shoulder she gazed up into crystal blue eyes.
"We need a video camera in
Mike's eyebrow rose, giving Morigan
a strange look she asked.
"And why would we need that?"
"We could be millionaires
selling the tapes to one of those shows, you know like "Funniest Home Videos"
Or we could develop our own, call it Dangerous Sexual Escapades and What not to
"We do give a totally different
meaning to Safe Sex don't we?"
"Well, flying bullets and
glass is not my idea of Sexual Adventures."
"And what may I ask is?"
Morigan took on a pensive look,
remaining quiet to long for Mike.
"Weasel Morigan Jenson-Connelly,
I don't like the look on your face!"
"Uhhmmm, HELL YES! I'm waiting
for horns or something to sprout."
"Ohhh I have horns all right!"
Morigan gave a crazy laugh.
"OOhhh shit, What are you
up to?" Mike asked with a worried look on her face. "You didn't put
a camera or anything in here did ya?"
"No but I did get something
when me and Stacey went to Martinsburg the other day."
A wicked gleam came to Mikes eyes.
"You did huh? Care ta share?"
"Of course, is there any
other way?" Rolling away from Mike she reached under her pillow and pulled
out a black leather harness and dangled it in front of her wife. Mike wiggled
her dark eyebrows at her. "My baby Weasel in black leather, hoo boy!"
"Not this time Stud, I have
something to go with this that I know you'll like." Straddling Mikes thigh
she reached over and pulled out a double headed dildo, after running it between
her breasts she ran her tongue up the side of it. She felt Mike shiver and saw
a glow come to her darkening blue eyes. Watching the effect it had on her lover
she circled the tip with her tongue then slipped it between her lips. The entire
time she kept eye contact with Mike to watch the effects her little display had
on her. Pushing it between her lips again she pushed her wet mound into Mikes
"Ohhh Gods! Keep that up
and we won't need it!" Mike tossed her head back and moaned. Morigan ran
her hand up the inside of Mike's thigh towards her center. Avoiding it at the
last second brought a gasp from her, running her fingers through dark curls she
brought the head of the didlo down to run it across Mike's throbbing lips. Sliding
down Mike's thigh she left it wet with her juices, leaning over she flicked the
bundle of nerves with her tongue as she slipped the dildo inside of Mike.
"OOOhhh Gods Weasel!"
Mike grabbed the headboard behind her hoping the wood was strong enough to hold
up under her clutching hands. Morigan pulled the dildo out part way then slowly
pushed it back in.
"Your gonna kill me baby!"
"Ohhh I see torture...OOhhh
"Not yet Warrior!" Morigan
slipped the harness over the other end then fastened the straps around Mike's
hips. Raising herself up she lowered herself over the dildo. Never before had
she had anything inside of her except for Mike's fingers and she knew there would
be some pain and discomfort. At first her muscles balked then accepted as she
lowered herself until she felt Mike's wetness against her own. Grinding her hips
she groaned deep in her chest to match Mike's growl. She pulled away, then pushed
forward thrusting her hips into Mike. They were both soo close when Mike flipped
them over that she decided to slow them down a bit.
"Tell me if I hurt you OK?"
"You won't hurt me."
Mike started kissing Morigan's
neck working her way to the corner of her mouth where she teased her lips with
her tongue. Taking it further she pushed her tongue past warm lips to taste the
sweetness within. When she felt Morigan push her hips into her own she withdrew
halfway and circled her hips. Morigan arched her back and clutched Mike's upper
arms with her hands.
"Harder Mike.... I want to
feel all of you.... Please!"
She pumped her hips into her lover
slowly at first, until she felt Morigan wrap her legs around the back of her thighs
and pull her in faster. Their bodies moved together each giving and taking at
the same time. The muscles in Mike's back flexing under Morigan's clutching fingers
when she pulled herself closer so that their breasts pressed together. Mike felt
her lovers leg muscles start to tremble with the onset of her climax and knew
that she herself was very close to going over the edge. Dipping her hips down
as far as she could, she came up and pushed Morigan over. She followed the minute
Morigan bucked against her and screamed her name. Panting into each other's neck
they lay and let the tremors course through their bodies.
"I never thought we would
do that!" Mike mumbled into Morigan's neck. Leaning up onto one elbow she
looked down into green eyes. "You are a wicked woman."
"You mean all this time you
wanted to do that and you never said anything?"
A blush crept up her neck. "Well,
I...ahhh didn't know how to ahhh bring it up." Dropping her head down she
rested her forehead on Morigan's chest. "I didn't know how you would take
it if I said that I wanted to make love to you like a man."
Morigan raised Mike's face using
two fingers under her chin. "Now you don't have to worry about asking."
Morigan grabbed Mike's lower lip with her teeth and sucked it into her mouth.
After letting go she pushed Mike up so that she was sitting on her calves without
losing the connection between them. Undoing the straps on the harness she slid
it up the dildo and refastened it around her own hips. "You know what I want?"
Mike shook her head. "I wanna fuck your brains out, I want you screaming
my name so loud that the whole house hears you, I want you to walk funny for the
next week. Can you handle that?"
Mike was shocked at the forceful
nature that had come over her usual tame lover. The thought of Weasel taking such
control over her had her throbbing with want. "Fuck me Weasel!"
Jack pulled the pillow over her
head and groaned. "Gods I don't know if I can handle much more of this!"
The moaning and groaning was funny at first but this time it was killing her.
Meanwhile next door was Steve, who was sprawled out on his bed in his jockey's
sound asleep. Mouth wide open snoring like a grizzly. The snoring played like
background music to the other noises that Jack was trying to ignore. Flipping
over on her back she kicked the mattress with her heels and screamed into her
her new mantra. Counting on her fingers she groaned when the fifth finger popped
up. "Ooohhh yippee, two more years and I become a virgin again!" Her
profession didn't allow for any kind of relationship and she was often lonely.
She started laughing at the thought of her friend and Cohort Officer Oinknowski
being in the same sexually deprived boat with her. She sat up suddenly because
it was quiet.
"There are Gods!" Flipping
over on her side she snuggled down into her pillow and drifted off to sleep.
Morigan pushed Mike onto her back;
entwining their fingers she stretched their arms over Mike's head. Outlining her
ear with her tongue she worked her way down to Mike's neck. Licking the salty
wetness from her skin she started to bite hard enough to make Mike whimper. By
the time she had made her way all the way to the other side she had Mike squirming
beneath her. Getting to her knees, Morigan put Mike's leg up on her shoulder and
started thrusting into her enough to make Mike arch up off the bed.
"OOOHHH GODS!!" Mike
Morigan thrust harder and faster,
sweat ran down their bodies making them so slick that Mike's leg slipped to the
bed. She sat up and made Morigan stop her movements long enough so that she could
unfasten the harness from her hips. Holding onto the center of the dildo she pulled
back then thrust forward. Morigan saw what she was doing and soon they were in
sync with each other.
Poni and Stacey joined their screams
at the end. Then all was quiet. Until they heard a war cry and feet running down
the hall. Mike raised up on her elbows and yelled. "Hey guys, ya think it
was Steve's snoring?" She was answered by their laughter.
A blurry red rimmed eyed Jack sat at the kitchen table drinking coffee when her
noisy housemates came downstairs. All four of them walking kind of funny and looking
"Rat bitches!" Jack
growled at them.
"What's the matter Jack,
"For your information, not
that it is but I can have sex anytime I want, so there."
Mike cocked an eyebrow at her.
"That doesn't count."
"Oohhh so it's been years!"
"You can bite me to!"
"Who can bite what?"
A bright eyed Steve asked as he came sliding across the kitchen floor in his socks.
"None of your business, go
"I just love when you're
mean to me Ducky." Leaning over he gave her a sloppy kiss on her neck. A
wicked grin came to his face. "Well, this is a bonus I got ta taste Stace
at the same time."
"Gods you're a pig Steve!"
"OK, tell me something Steve.
How the hell can you be so chipper this morning after having ta listen ta the
Lesbian Tabernacle Choir all fucking night!?!"
"Who are you?" Steve
"Ohhh I forgot." Poni
grinned at Steve. "Jack this is the little Bastard Steve. Bastard this is
your worst nightmare, my cousin Jack Poninger."
Jack started laughing at the look
on Steve's face. "Oh joy, little Stevie all grown up, tell me has everything
grown up?" She glanced down to make her point as she walked around him.
"That's not the part that
interests you Jack. And since your here I think I'll go rent a bank vault for
all my valuables!"
Before he turned his back he slid
his wallet into his front pocket. Grabbing his coffee he left the kitchen to call
from the doorway that he'd be back in a minute.
"Oh he'll be back all right."
Jack said with a big grin on her face as she tossed his drivers license and cash
in the middle of the table. Morigan's eyes grew wide as she stared at Jack. "I
didn't even see you near him!"
"I have many skills."
She gave a maniacal laugh that sent chills up Morigan's spine.
Stacey kicked her under the table.
"I hate when you do that! Ya crazy bitch!"
Steve came back in the kitchen
carrying a brown paper bag that he handed to Jack. "I'm not giving you this
because I like you, it's so I don't have ta hear ya bitch every morning."
"What is it?" Jack asked.
"A Lesbian Survival Kit."
She opened the bag and dumped
out a bunch of earplugs. "After 2 days of no sleep it was the only thing
I could think of." He shrugged his shoulders at her.
"Are we that loud Ducky?"
Stace asked with an innocent look on her face.
Jack and Steve started laughing
at them. "Ooohhh noooo, not at all!" They both replied in unison.
"Ahhh Stevie this is yours."
Jack pointed to his stuff on the table.
" I don't believe it, next
you'll steal my jockey shorts!"
"Nahhh I stole Poni's!"
had left for work leaving Mike and the others to their sick minds and the cars
they had to fix. Mike was under a 4x4 truck bolting the starter back on and Jack
being the smallest one besides Morigan was laying inside the engine area head
first bolting on the manifolds. "How the hell does someone tear the whole
bottom out of their truck when ya need a step ladder ta get in the damn thing?"
"Easy, they thought it would
be cool ta go 4 wheeling at the quarry and found out that those are not mud holes
but sink holes. Are ya almost done up there?"
A wicked grin crossed Jack's face
at what had kept her so long putting 6 bolts in the engine block as she looked
right down the front of Mike's T-Top. "Yep, all done."
"Good now ya can get your
eyeballs off my tits."
"Where's Poni at?"
"I sent her in ta town for
some parts I ordered."
"Any idea about who that
was that had ya picking up that hot car?"
"Nope and when Stacey tried
ta call them she got a recording that the number had been disconnected."
"How many times has something
like this happened?"
"This is the first time,
all though we could of had others and not really known. We don't ask for proof
of ownership or anything for repairs. Why all the questions?"
"Ohh just curious."
She crawled out from where she was and yelped in pain. "I didn't realize
that there were so many car thefts around here. Gods my back is killing me."
She sat on the floor of the garage and waited for Mike to crawl out. "Now
in Texas 2 or 3 a day was light, sometimes as many as 8 or 9 a day all headed
for the Mexican border. Now ya want a car or truck, that's where ya go."
Mike slid across the floor on
her creeper. "And how do ya know all this?" She asked with a raised
Jack gave her own version of the
eyebrow. "Professional knowledge, ya gotta know where ta take em." Leaning
back on her hands she tilted her head to the side and grinned at Mike. "Those
were the days. Now I'm to damn old and Jail isn't any fun anymore."
Stacey leaned in through the door
of the garage. "Hey I could use some help if you guys are done. I have Morigan's
hood ta put back on, and I'm not doing the Poni and balancing it on my head."
"This is Morigan's car?"
Jack said as she looked at the high performance engine. "My Gods, this thing
"Don't even think about it
Jack, ya ain't driving it."
"It's not that, she doesn't
look like the type ta drive heavy metal."
They bolted the hood on the firebird
and Mike pulled the brown paper off that Stacey uses to protect car parts from
damage. Jack almost fell over when she saw the painting on the hood. "You
sure are roped Mikey."
"Yep, and I like it that
way. If we're done here I got somethin ta pick up, I'll see ya later."
"So Stace, what's the story
with those two?"
"I'll tell ya over cookies,
but if ya repeat it, Poni will kill ya."
"So Poni was behind it huh?"
"We all were. Well, we just
pushed a little. But Morigan had her the minute she walked through the garage
door. Come on before they get back or they'll eat all my cookies."
Stacey gave Jack the short version
of how Morigan and Mike met and their difficulties. In addition, what Mike went
through to get her back.
"You have anybody?"
"Nope, not for years. I like
being alone and it wouldn't be fair to anyone to hang with me cuz I never stay
in one place more than a couple of months. And the stuff I do is dangerous and
I may not make it one day. I don't wanna put anybody through that."
"Where have you been living
since ya came back?"
Jack grinned at her. "Fairfax
county jail. Nice enough place but after a year it gets boring."
"Mind telling me what ya
were in for?"
"Nope, Drug trafficking.
Got caught in a drug ring bust and went away on a 1-5 but got out early for good
behavior. I'll never forget that time in, actually my back won't let me forget."
"I don't think I wanna know
about your time on your back."
"Nothin like that, I got
some discs messed up in a fight and it kills me when I move around to much. Which
reminds me, could ya walk on my back for me?"
Jack laid on her stomach on the
living room floor waiting for Stacey to walk across her back. Stacey was just
about to step on her back when Poni snuck in behind her. Holding her finger up
to her lips for Stacey not to say anything. She straddled Jack's hips and started
messaging her neck and shoulders.
"Keep that up Stace and I'll
steal ya from my Cousin!"
"Oh ya wouldn't have ta do
that she'd share."
Poni felt Jack tense up. "Excuse
"We have foursomes all the
time with Mike and Morigan."
Poni looked over her shoulder
at her shrugging wife.
"Oooohhh yeah, Lotsa sex
in this house."
Jack was shaking then groaning
when Poni started moving against her hips with her own.
"Mother of Gods Stace, don't
Poni leaned down next to her ear
and growled in a deep voice. "Why not?"
Jack jumped and turned under Poni,
when she did every disc in her back cracked. "Gods that was better than sex!
You two are mean! Now let me up so I can go take a freezing shower." Poni
helped her off the floor and wiggled her eyebrows at her. "Paybacks Jack."
Supper that night was a collection
of stuff that Morigan and Stacey threw together from out of the freezer. Jack
was on the phone talking to someone about needing some numbers. That she would
call back in the morning. Morigan overheard what she was saying but said nothing
and pretended that she had just walked into tell her it was time to eat. Steve
didn't come home for supper which wasn't unusual. He sometimes went out with friends
and came in late. This night they were in the living room when they heard him
whispering and then two sets of feet running up the steps. Raised eyebrows went
around the room. "Ya'll are gonna kill me!" Jack groaned. They heard
a short time later the unmistakable noises coming from upstairs. Then a loud crash,
and more rapturous noises. They couldn't help it, they all started yelling gross
and disgusting things and laughing.
Jack got an evil grin on her face,
leaning over to Poni she whispered in her ear. The next thing everyone knew Jack
and Poni were running from the room.
"They're up ta something."
Mike said as she got up to follow.
Three of them crawled up the steps
on the hands and knees only to find an empty hallway. Mike shrugged her shoulders
and turned to go back downstairs when she heard a noise outside. She mouthed "Ohhh
shit." and took off down the stairs at a run. Stacey and Morigan followed
her out the back door and around the back of the house to where Steve's window
was. There they found Poni with Jack clinging to her back at the top of a ladder
staring into Steve's window.
"OOhhh my Gods!" They
both yelled. The next thing everyone knew the ladder was sliding sideways down
the side of the house.
"Son of a biiiiitch!"
They both yelled as the ground came up to meet them. Poni landed on her side with
Jack landing on top of her. If not for Mike's quick thinking the ladder would
have hit them. Before they could even catch their breaths they were being questioned.
Gasping for air Poni answered. "Man."
"What?" Asked Mike.
"Steve and man." Jack
"EEEWWW!" Stacey replied
with a grimace on her face.
They helped Poni and Jack off
the ground then they took off for the house, charging up the steps they all stood
in the hallway outside of Steve's door and started moaning and groaning. Steve
yanked the door open and told them all to go to Hell then slammed the door in
their laughing faces.
Jack was using the phone and
the computer at the same time when Steve came downstairs from his room with his
friend. Jack looked up and all most fell out of her chair. The guy was very tall,
blond, blue eyed and not at all what she thought would be Steve's type. Well,
she always thought female was his type.
"Hey ya, sneaking off with
out introducing your friend?" She emphasized the last word with wiggling
eyebrows. Steve's eyes bore into her, a look of pure violence showed on his face.
"One word and you'll be Jack in the box!" Jack fiend fright. "Ohhh
please not the box!" She looked at his friend. "It gets cramped in there.
Soooo, ya gonna tell Ma? I'm sure she would just love ta meet your new friend."
Steve came around the desk after
her but she was faster than him and was up and over the desk and headed for the
kitchen yelling at the top of her lungs.
"RAPE!! RAPE!! With an evil
smirk on her face she looked at him from her hiding place behind Mike. "It's
been soooo looong that I'd even go for you and seek help afterwards for falling
off the path of satisfying sex!"
Mike gave them 'The eyebrow'.
"What the Hell are you two up to?"
"I wasn't up ta nothin but
Stevie here was up all night and then he was sneaking out of here with his boy
toy and I caught him."
The said boy toy walked into the
kitchen and stood behind Steve. He looked at the assembled group before him.
Five sets of eyes popped at the
6'6" 210lb cowboy. His curly blond hair hung to his shoulders; blue eyes
peeked out from under his gray Stetson. A show of white teeth showed from behind
"DAMN!!! Stevie where the
hell did ya find him!?!" Poni asked.
"Most likely wandering around
campus." Morigan replied. ""So Professor Jackson want some breakfast?"
Morigan came flying down the stairs
to answer the phone that had been ringing on and off for the last 10 minutes.
She was hoping that someone else would get it, namely Jack. But of course she
was doing more important things like rolling all over the living room floor playing
"You stupid BASTARD! Get
your ass up there!" She rolled over and up to her feet, weaving back and
forth. Her hands shooting up into the air just about pulling the game from the
entertainment center. Morigan watched from behind her as the Tie fighter she was
flying did an inverted dive towards the surface of the planet below. Morigan found
herself falling forward then jerking to the left as the Tie fighter did the same.
Then jumped back as the planet exploded into fiery bits. Jack let out a battle
cry that made Morigan cover her ears.
"JACK!" She yelled over
"That thing that rings is
for you, it's an Officer Oinknowski."
"Ooohhh SHIT! I forgot, here
hold this." She handed Morigan the control for the Nintendo and ran for the
phone in the kitchen.
"Oink ya there? Hey I know
I forgot, how much time do I have?" She pulled her pocket watch out, groaning
at the time. "There is no way in Hell I'll be able ta get a ride and be there
in time. Wait a minute someone's pounding on the door." Stretching the cord
of the phone across the kitchen she pulled the door open and yelled over her shoulder
to come in as she walked back to the phone. She stopped dead in her tracks when
she started hearing Oink's voice in stereo.
"Cute Oink, get me all hyper
thinking I'm gonna get in trouble."
"You deserve it, now come
on or we'll both be in the shit house."
"Let me grab my wallet and
I'll be right there." Running through the house she jumped down the living
room steps to find Morigan falling on the floor from the nose-dive the Tie Fighter
"Hey, I gotta go ta court.
Oink's here ta get me I should be back later today."
Jack grabbed her wallet and ran
up the steps using her hands to keep from falling. And ran right into Oink's legs.
"Who is that!?!" Asked
"Hands off, she's a married
women and Mike would kill ya."
Oink shook her head at Morigan
who was fighting with the control wire that was wrapped around her legs. "What
a waste, I hope he's all that."
"Ohhh man is she!"
"Any other good looking bodacious
single women here?"
Jack gave her a big toothy grin
and wiggled her unibrow. "Me."
"FORGET IT JACK! Out of the
four things I listed the only thing you qualify for is two of them, no make that
Poni had just unhooked a blue
BMW that they had been called to pick up at the Walmart shopping center. The owner
said that when he came out of the store he couldn't get it to start and wanted
them to pick it up and fix it. Poni pushed it into the garage and then thought
about how she as gonna put the brake on while keeping it from rolling out of the
"All brawn and no brains."
Jack stood inside the doorway grinning at her cousin.
"Are ya gonna stand there
or are ya gonna help me?"
"Ohhh I thought I'd just
watch ya until ya popped a blood vessel." Poni glared at her with her camel
colored eyes. "On second thought that would kinda messy. Stace would rip
my arms off and beat me ta death." She slid chocks behind the tires. "Where'd
this one come from?"
"Another dead one at Walmart,
wimpy ass guy couldn't get it ta start."
Jack pulled a small notebook from
her back pocket and wrote down the VIN number from the inside door panel then
checked all the other areas that the number would have been placed by the manufacture.
Her left eyebrow rose when she looked at all the different numbers she had written
in her book. Her mind started slapping her hard. "You dumbass, of course
this is how they do it!" She thought to herself. "Pon's let me know
when the owner calls about pickup."
Mike stood looking under the hood
of the BMW, shaking her head at the problem at hand. "Who would steal the
distributor cap?" Stace and Poni just shrugged their shoulders. "Call
the guy and tell him his car is done and tell Morigan ta charge the idiot double."
She looked at the shocked looks on her friends faces. "For wasting our time.
Teach the asshole ta lock his doors next time."
Jack was waiting for the owner
to show up so that she could ask him some questions about his car. She was just
about ready to call it a day when a black Lincoln Towncar pulled into the driveway.
The guy that got out of the passenger side did not look like any one who would
drive a BMW. Redneck was more like it, grungy, long hair and hadn't seen water
in two seasons.
"Ya here for the beemer?"
"It's done right? We got
a call and I'm in a hurry."
"Yep it's done, let me ask
ya a question. I noticed that the car has been reported stolen." The guy
stopped dead in his tracks and looked at her. "There's no problem with that
as far as I'm concerned, as long as you give me a job."
"And why would I do that?"
"Cuz I'm the best there is
and with my connections here I could be a big help ta ya."
"Who says you're the best?
Cuz ya certainly don't look like much ta me."
"All right fair enough, I'll
She walked over to the Lincoln
opened the door and locked it then slammed it shut. Reaching inside her boot she
pulled out a thin strip of metal. Within 2 seconds she had the passenger side
"So ya can open doors, any
kid can do that."
"Ya but the State of Texas
and Fairfax Virginia says that I hold the record for car theft."
"If you're so good how come
you're known by the jail system?"
"Cuz I had an asshole partner
who turned me in and took off with the bills."
"OK, I'll talk to the boss.
Meet us at the Winners Circle by the race track at midnight."
Mike came into the kitchen after
finishing the last of the car repairs to find the kitchen a complete disaster
area. The breakfast dishes were still on the table and sink along with the frying
pan with food still in them. The coffeepot had what looked like sludge burned
in the bottom of it and it was still cooking away. It then hit her that she hadn't
seen Morigan since that morning. She knew if Morigan was going somewhere that
she would have said something and she wouldn't be at school because they were
out on spring break. Panic hit her square in the chest; she tore through the house
and headed up the steps to their bedroom only to find it the way they had left
it. Searching the rest of the upstairs left her ready to call the police. She
jumped down the steps to land in a tuck and roll move and off again at a sprint
to search the rest of the house. She was just about to go outside when she heard
a moan of pain come from the living room. She came to the living room steps and
again jumped down and froze where she landed. There laid Morigan on her back,
with her arms thrown out to her sides wincing and moaning. Crawling over to her
she pushed blond hair back from her lovers face.
"Hey ya Snuggles, done for
the day?" Morigan asked with twinkling green eyes.
Crystal blue eyes that once showed
concern changed in a heart beat to irritation when she seen the control pad for
"Not you to!"
"Huh, what not me to?"
"You're hooked! Just like
Poni, sometimes it was days before we seen her upstairs and then it was just ta
"Come on I'm not that bad,
I've only been playing since Jack left at.... What time is it?"
Mike couldn't help but laugh at
her. "It's 6:30pm"
"Oh geez, I've been playing
all day! No wonder why I'm hungry, what are we having for supper?"
"Since a cyclone hit the
kitchen, I think we're calling Domino's for Pizza."
"OK, I'll get the paper plates
and clean up the damages and you can call. That is if ya help me up. I think I
forgot how to walk."
Mike grinned at her knowing damn
well why Morigan didn't want to use the phone. "Fingers blistered huh?"
Six pizzas later everyone was
slumped around the living room watching TV when Steve and Keith came in the room.
"Did you guys leave any Pizza?"
Steve looked at Poni who had Stacy laying back against her chest.
"Nope, get your own ya little
bastard." Poni growled as she ran her fingers through her wives long curly
blond hair. "Of course we did, look in the oven."
"What the crusts?"
"Nah, there's slices in there
but I ate all the good stuff off of them." She gave him a great big toothy
He looked at Keith with drawn
brows. "See what I have ta put up with!?! She's turned more men into Queens
than Dolly has wigs!" His eyes squinted at them when they all started howling
and barking. "Damn bitches."
As they went back upstairs towards
the kitchen Keith pulled him to the side.
"Is it really that bad?"
"Nah, Hell I'd be lost with
out them! What other guy has 5 sisters that can fix his car when it breaks down?
Damn wait here I forgot something." He headed back towards the living room
and yelled down the steps. "Hey there's a station wagon outside, anyone you
Jack jumped up and ran for the
steps. "Shit I forgot!"
A few minutes later Jack came
into the living room with Oink following. "Hey guys, this is Oink."
She introduced everyone, and then it hit Poni who she was as she stared at the
tall black woman who was dressed in a dark blue T-shirt, cami's and combat boots.
"Aren't ya a cop?" She
"Yeah, but tonight I'm off
duty and someone has to keep Jack out of trouble and Jail."
Jack was pulling on her leather biker jacket and slipping her slim Jim's in her
engineer boots when she told them that they were going to the Winners Circle in
"That's not Jail time that's
hospital time, oh wait Poni's not going with ya." Stacey laughed.
"How was I suppose ta know
that he was married ta that fat fugly woman."
Jack looked at her cousin with
raised eyebrows. "You hit on a fugly woman?"
"Hell no! I just said she
was fugly and her husband clocked me with a beer bottle. Took 16 stitches ta close
up my head. Wanna see? Any way it was Mike's fault"
"Nah, that's OK I believe
ya. Well, gotta go see ya later."
"My poor baby ducky, always
misunderstood." Stace placed a kiss on top of her wives head.
Oink and Jack got out of the car
at the Winners Circle bar. Oink took one look at the place and cringed. "Are
you sure this is the place? It looks like it should be condemned. And no body
better mess with the Hoopety, that's the only car I have."
"Oink, don't worry. If anything
happens the Hospital is just down the road and I don't think anyone is gonna bother
Jack pushed the buzzer on the
doorframe and heard the lock click open. They had to squint in the darkness to
be able to see anything. Then squinted even more at what they seen.
"EEEEWWW, I'm gonna use Lysol
in my bath tonight!" Oinker whispered in Jacks ear. "And don't call
anyone fugly, these guys will kill both of us and just toss us in a Dumpster somewhere."
"There's the guy we're suppose
They went to the only table in
the place that sat against the back wall. Two men sat at it one was clean cut
and wore a Charlestown Racetrack security uniform and the other if she could believe
her eyes looked dirtier than before. They sat down at the table opposite the men.
"Who's your friend?"
The grungy man asked.
"My partner Oink, we work
"The deal was that you would
be here, you never said anything about a partner."
"She's the only one that
I trust, either it's the two of us or it's no go."
The boss nodded his head at the
other guy. "No problem, but you two split the take. Now this is how it's
done. You come in here, see Ben. He gives you the keys to the cars that are parked
in the Valet parking lot at the track. You grab the car and take it to the Walmart
parking lot. Park them in the row near the Ground round. Ben here calls the garages
and has them picked up. When the cars have been picked up you two get paid the
next night right here. Got it?"
"No problem, got anything
He handed over three sets of keys
with tags on them giving the make and color of the car.
"If you get caught, one word
and no one will ever see you two again. Got it?"
"No problem, we'll be on
our way then if that's all?"
Oink drove to the shopping center
and waited for Jack to show up. While she waited she pulled out a notebook and
wrote down everything that she had heard that night. "Just great Jack, now
what have you gotten us into?" She asked herself.
She sat for 20 minutes and worried
about where Jack was, it never took her this long to steal a car before. She sat
tapping on the steering wheel and watching for a car that would be carrying her
idiot friend and hope that there were no flashing lights to announce her arrival.
The passenger door opened and Jack jumped in scaring the life out of Oink.
"Where the Hell have you
been!?" Oink yelled nearly blowing Jacks ears off.
"I stopped ta get somethin ta eat, I brought ya somethin to so don't complain."
On top of the burger and fries was a box of Krispie Kreme donuts.
"Didn't want ya ta feel outta
sorts." Jack gave her a grin when she seen Oink hide the box of donuts on
her side of the Hoopety. "Ready, we got two more and then we're done for
"I don't like this Jack,
we better not get caught!"
"Don't worry, I have connections
Mike laid in bed with Morigan
curled up against her side as she read a racing magazine. Morigan grabbed the
magazine out of Mike's hands and tossed it on the floor. "You haven't heard
a word I've said have you?"
"Huh?" Her blue eyes
blinking into green trying to refocus. "Uhhmm well...nope, sorry."
"I said what are we gonna
do about Jack, if she gets caught doing what ever she's doing. She may drag all
of us with her. And I do not look good in jumpsuits let alone one that's orange."
Mike brushed back blond hair from
Morigan's face and ran her thumb across an arched eyebrow. "Maybe they'll
give us prison blues, I think ya would look good in those." Her eyes twinkled
with humor at the look on Morigan's face.
"Funny, I'm being serious
"How about if I have a talk
with her? I've worked to hard ta loose my garage and I know Ma wouldn't be thrilled
about me doing time. I don't wanna even be in the same state when she finds out
"Like Ma doesn't know."
Morigan came up on one elbow to place her forehead against Mike's. "There's
nothing that Ma doesn't know, she knew about us and that was before I even showed
"And I bless every cornfield
I see little Weasel."
"I'm surprised that ya haven't
bought that field and erected a shrine." Morigan said in a teasing manner
then pulled back when she felt the muscles in Mike's face tense. "Michaela?"
"Uhhhmmm.... I did that already.
In fact I bought it after the first week."
"You're kidding right?"
Mike shook her head no. "Your unbelievable."
Poni hung off the bed backwards
watching the little TV that she had on a wall mount while Stacey sketched in her
pad. She was coming close to ending up on her head if she didn't stop rolling
around on the bed.
"Drake! One more move and
I'll knock the Hell outta you."
"But cuddles, how am I suppose
ta keep still if my Tie fighter keeps doing nose dives? I gotta kill off all those
"I swear that game has gone
to all of your heads. That's the worse thing I could have ever bought you. And
now ya have Jack and Morigan hooked." Stacey put her pad away then crawled
to the end of the bed to lay on top of Poni.
"What is Jack doing?"
"Pon, if she gets caught
we're all in trouble you know that don't ya? And you've already been in jail cuz
of a stolen car."
"I know, but what can I do?
She's always ripped things off."
"Come on, we're gonna go
talk ta Mike about this and see what she says about it."
"But cuddles, I only have
two more fighters ta take down." She whined.
She rolled off the bed mumbling
the entire time it took them to get to Mike and Morigan's room. "I never
get ta play. It ain't fair and you're a meaney Stace."
"Yeah yeah, now come on."
The four of them were laying on
the bed talking when Jack and Oink came upstairs. Jack ran and jumped on top of
everyone leaving Oink standing in the hallway with her mouth hanging open.
"Hey ya guys, is it group
sex night?" Jack asked from where she laid across Poni's back. "If ya
don't get off of me it's gonna be beat Jack night!"
"Ohh but baby ducky I like
it when ya guys are rough and Oink has hand cuffs!"
Poni got up on her knees and flipped
Jack onto the floor. "And I just might use them and cuff ya ta my truck.
Hey that's an idea, then we wouldn't have ta worry about going ta jail!"
Mike grabbed Jack by her shirtfront
and jerked her up to with in inches of her face so that their noses touched.
"You fuck up and get us all
in trouble and I'll turn ya over ta Ma, ya got me?"
"No prob Mikey, It'll be
OK don't worry. Can Oink sleep in one of the empty rooms tonight so she doesn't
have ta drive all the way ta Fairfax?"
"Oink take the one next ta
Jack's." Morigan said. "Now everyone out, I need my beauty rest."
The next morning everyone sat
in the kitchen eating their breakfast. Jack walked in wearing a sweatshirt, boxers
and huge wolf head slippers on her feet. Right behind her was poor Oink, her hair
sweeping from the back to stick out on the sides of her head, her eyes bloodshot
and half closed as she stumbled into the kitchen. The kitchen broke out with laughter
at the site of her.
"Rough night Oink?"
"What the Hell was all that
noise last night? I could have sworn I was sleeping in the Zoo in between the
bear cage and the monkey house! And then this is the weird part I kept hearing
war cries like the damn Indians were attacking!"
"I didn't hear anything,
did you Poni?" Asked Stacey.
"Nope, how about you guys?"
Oink watched as everyone shook their heads at once. "I know I heard something
Mike and Poni got up and went
out the kitchen door to head towards the garage. Oink had just sat down when she
heard two war cries echo outside.
"That's it! That's what I
Weeks had gone by with Oink and
Jack making trips to the Winners Circle three to four times a week. With Jack
stealing the cars and Oink waiting for her at the Walmart parking lot. Each cars
VIN number was recorded by Jack and handed off to Oink, who then ran them through
the police computer at work. Cross checking the Charlestown Police files she found
that none of the cars had reports on them. She knew that the owners had to have
a report to give to their insurance companies. Which meant one thing, someone
in the Police force was dirty and most likely getting a cut on the deal for keeping
it quiet. That meant that her job just got harder. They had just finished making
up a new computer file on Oink that would transfer her to the Charlestown Police
Department. Then it was off to what Jack called body surfing the net.
"Damn it Jack let me see!"
"Just hold on a minute will
Jack had Oink's chest smashed
down onto the desk while she leaned over her back. Pulling up a web page that
she had been searching for she let out a yell that deafened Oink.
"OOOOOHHH BABY COME TA JACK!"
"Let me see!" Oink struggled
beneath Jack's weight. "I'll tell Poni that you posed for nudy shots on the
"That wasn't me! My tits
ain't that big." A low growl came from Jack. "Gods have mercy!"
Oink was now practically prone
on the desk with Jack crawling still further up her back.
"What the Hell are you two
doing?" Mike asked as she stood looking over the top of the monitor that
Jack had her tongue stuck to.
"Uuuuuhhhhmmm, ithss irty?"
"Uuhh huuh, tell me another
Jack pulled back and tried to
clear the screen but Mike was faster and grabbed the mouse. "Jack, you really
need ta find a real woman. I don't think licking the screen with a picture of
Lucy Lawless on it counts as a real date."
"I once had a date with a
woman who looked like Lucy. That is after half a bottle of Jack Daniels she did!"
Oink pulled herself up from the
desktop and drilled Jack with her brown eyes. "Just keep that tongue off
of Renee, she's mine! And that woman looked like a demented WWF wrestler!"
"That's why it took half
a bottle." Jack grinned then shivered at the memory."
Hours later they were all piled
into the Hoopety on their way to Hagerstown Maryland to a bar called DeerPark.
The bar was on old route 40 in the middle of no where, which was good since just
about anything you could think of went on there in the parking lot. Tonight the
parking lot was packed as well as the sides of the road. A sign on the door stated
that the bar was having a Miss Drag Queen contest. Once inside it became obvious
that some of the queens should have left their heels at home.
"Damn!" Poni gasped.
"Did ya see that one with the big hair? She should cover her face with it
and cover up that 5 o'clock shadow that the 10 pounds of makeup couldn't do!"
"Be nice baby." Stace
whispered in her wives ear. "Or she might beat you up with her huge purse."
Jack had a hold of Oink's hand and was dragging her unwilling friend towards the
back of the bar.
"Come on Oink, loosen up
a little. Who knows we might find some desperate women!"
"Gee, thanks for the encouragement
Jack. And maybe if we find them they won't want to tie us up and steal or wallets
like the last time!"
"Hey that wasn't my fault!
How was I ta know that it was a S&M Bar!" She ground out between clenched
"Right, and I suppose the
whips and hand cuffs everyone had didn't clue you in either?" Oink emphasized
with a slap to the back of Jack's head.
Jack found a table at the back
near the door to the outside area that contained picnic tables for those who wanted
to take a break from the smoke, noise and constant pushing and shoving of the
"Stay here and I'll get us
some drinks. If ya see the others wave them over."
Poni and Stace got lucky and found
the pool table empty. While Mike and Morigan made their way to one of the 3 bars
to get drinks and then find Oink and Jack. They where just about to walk into
the main part of the bar when the announcer came of the PA system and announced
that the pageant would now start. They found a place along the wall where they
could see and not get pushed around too much. With Mike against the wall she pulled
Morigan back against her chest and rested her chin on top of her blond head.
The contestants came out onto
the now vacant dance floor to hear yelling and screaming upon their arrival.
"Holy shit!" Mike heard
yelled into her ear. "Look at the legs on that one! OOOOWWWW!!!" Poni
screeched. "Baby ya didn't let me finish." She gave Stace a pleading
puppy dog look. "Look at the bony knees!"
"Go put a dress on and get
up there Poni." Mike snickered. "You can do the Victor Victoria
thing and beat all of them."
"Yeah, even with your hairy
"You're an asshole Jack!"
Poni snapped as she took a jab at Jack's chest.
"I got us a table in the
back, Oink's there now watching our drinks."
Morigan raised an eyebrow at Jack.
"She's watching our drinks?"
"Yep, don't worry Oink doesn't
` They made there way to the table
and found Oink weaving back and forth with a half empty glass of beer in her hand
and a table full of empties.
"I thought you said she doesn't
drink." Morigan chuckled in Jack's ear.
"Oooohhhh shit!" Jack
covered her face with her hands.
They let Oink jump around by the
table and once the pageant was done and the better looking of the ugly drag queens
was crowned they pushed her out onto the dance floor. What Oink was doing on the
dance floor looked like some kind of animal mating ritual. And what Jack was doing
was! Until a jealous girlfriend chased her around the room threatening to rip
her into a couple hundred pieces.
The DJ called the last dance for
the night and put on a slow song for the remaining patrons. Mike, Morigan, Poni
and Stacey made their way to the dance floor. Dancing very close the two couples
swayed to Whitney Houston's I will always love you. That is until Oink
decided to drown out Whitney with her own voice. Couples cringed and looked around
trying to find where the horrible singing was coming from. Up on one of the closed
bars was Oink, bellowing out notes that no human should be aloud to make. And
if they do they should be locked up. To everyone's grateful ears the bouncer came
in and dragged Oink down off the bar. He was just about to toss her out the door
when Jack came to her rescue from her hiding place under one of the tables.
"Hold on buddy, I'll take
care of her." She yelled above Oink's dog whistle high note. Covering Oink's
mouth with her hand she ushered her out the door and towards Oink's station wagon
"The Hoopety" Putting her in the back she covered her with the blanket
back there then stood outside to save what little hearing she had left. By the
time everyone had come out and gotten in the car Oink had fallen asleep. Or so
they thought until not 15 minutes down the road she started up with Shania Twains
I feel like a woman. And every song that ever played on the country stations.
Oink crept down the stairs holding
her head and moaning. When she came into the kitchen where everyone was eating
breakfast, she took one look at their food and took off back upstairs at a sprint.
Morigan grinned at her friends.
"Looks like our little singer is suffering from a hangover. Should we help
her out?" Eyes traveled around the table, all together they replied "NAHHH!"
Jack rounded up her courage to
ask for a favor from Mike. Taking a deep breath she broached the dreaded subject.
"Mike, can you run me by
a friends house today? I need ta pick up something."
Mike put down her coffee cup raised
her famous eyebrow giving Jack the look. "Is it something that's illegal
"Uuuhhmm, only in some states.
Actually it's two things I have ta pick up before the asshole gets rid of them."
"If it's hot, I'm gonna toss
your ass out of the truck while we're doing a warp 9 down the road."
Jack started to laugh. "Ohhh
believe me no one in their right mind would steal this stuff!"
"OK, you've convinced me.
Lets go now before I change my mind."
Mike and Jack pulled into a yard
that looked like a junkyard in all directions. Mike gazed at the assortment of
old cars; her eyes caught on one in particular. A 1967 Shelby Mustang, the body
was rusted and in parts on the ground. She got out of her truck and was inspecting
the car when she heard something growling from her right side. She froze still;
fearful of having a huge Doberman or pit bull jump her with any sudden movement.
The deep growl continued, then she heard the dog pawing in the gravel with its
feet. She jumped 3 foot in the air at hearing the kill command come from behind
Then she felt feet bouncing off
of her calf and a yipping noise coming from the would be killer.
"What the Hell is that!?!"
She yelled at Jack who was coming up behind her as she Looked down on the very
small hairy dog.
"That's my guard dog, and
don't make fun of her she's very sensitive, you know about her s-i-z-e."
Jack, why are you spelling out
words? It's a demented Taco Bell dog not a human!"
"Yeah well, I dare ya ta
say the s-i-z-e word!"
Mike not being one to pass up
a dare said the word and watched as the 3 pound furball tore into her pant leg
with enough strength that Mike had to use a hand on the Shelby to keep from falling
"OK, I get it no short jokes.
Now get it off of me!"
Jack got down on her knees, snapping
her fingers the furball let go of Mike's pant leg and jumped into Jack's arms.
Disgusting Mike by hugging and kissing the ugly little dog and calling it all
kinds of disgusting little baby names that caused the dog to start howling with
a high ear piercing pitch.
"That's my little baby boo
boo, my pretty little baby. Did you miss mommy?"
"You're sick Jack! That's
got ta be the ugliest dog I've ever seen!" She was answered by sharp barks
and snapping as she looked at the multi colored black and silver dog. What struck
Mike was that its ears were huge and had no hair on the backs of them but were
outlined with pure white hair.
"For your information Mike,
Jessica is a retired Sgt. from the Texas Rangers DEA division. Aren't ya boo boo.
And she's not a demented Chihuahua, she's a Pekinese and Pomeranian mix."
"Drug dog?" Mike laughed.
"What did she hit on baby aspirins?"
Jack gave her a sheepish look,
then covered her dogs ears and whispered to Mike. "She was retired cuz every
time she was put on the baggage belt she was too little and ended up riding with
the bags into the claim area. Her nose didn't work to good for drugs; she only
hit on chocolate, scented tampons and maxi pads. But don't ever say anything ta
her cuz she gets depressed."
"Ooohhh shit, now I have ta put up with a manic depressive dog on top of
everything else! So what else do ya have ta pick up here?"
"You have a car? Where?"
Jack pointed to a rusted out Ford
Pinto; one of the side windows had duct tape across cracks as well as holding
the hood down. Mike laughed so hard that tears were streaming down her face.
Jack grinned at her. "I told
ya no one would steal it! But never under estimate a car by its looks. It's never
failed ta start when I needed it."
"Yeah, right. Lets get outta
here, I've got work to do at home."
Mike waited for Jack to start
her car and laughed when all she heard was a slow turning off the engine. Jack
got out slammed her hands down on the hood called it a stupid bitch, jumped back
in and tried again. On the third try it turned over and caught. Black smoke bellowed
out of the tail pipe with every backfire of the engine. Pulling beside Mike, Jack
yelled over the noise that she would race her home. Looking down into the car
she noticed that Jessica sat on a booster seat on the passenger side.
"The only way you'll beat
me is if Poni hauls that thing in behind her tow truck!"
"In your dreams Mike!"
Mike's truck hit 75mph and was
a good 6 car lengths ahead of Jack as they went down Rt. 340. Then all of a sudden
the junky Pinto was right beside her with a grinning Jack and howling dog starring
at her. Jack gave her a little wave and punched the gas pedal. Before Mike could
blink the junk heap was a good 1/4-mile ahead and still eating up road. When Mike
pulled her truck up to her garage Jack was sitting on the hood drinking a coke
and her dog was curled up on the roof of the car.
"What the Hell is under the
"Just a plain old engine."
She answered with a grin. "Wanna check it out?"
They pulled the duct tape off and used a pry bar to get the hood up. Mike whistled
between her teeth.
"Son of a bitch! Jack, that's
an engine out of a Police cruiser! This damn thing has a turbo charger on it!"
"I know, sweet ain't it?"
Oink pulled into the Charlestown
Police Department parking lot at 2:00pm to meet with the Chief concerning her
new position on the force. She was not impressed with the old geezer. What he
needed was a wheel chair the size of a small car to haul is 80 plus year old,
400lb carcass around and a oxygen tank strapped to the side of it but he would
just blow himself up since he chain smoked like a old smoke stack. And from the
look of his office floor they needed to sit him and his desk in a huge ashtray
and put a Dumpster outside of his window for all the take out containers that
where overflowing out of his trash can onto the floor. As he looked through her
file he wheezed and coughed enough that she thought he was going to keel over
on the spot, all it did for him was make him light up another cigarette so that
he had one burning in each hand.
"Soooo.... Officer Oinkski,
I see yar from Virginia. Well, let me be the first ta welcome ya ta West Virginia."
He reached into his desk drawer and tossed her a badge. Pinching it between her
two fingers to keep from getting ketchup and Mayo on her, she looked at the hole
in the center of it.
Not bothering to correct the old
geezer about screwing her name up. "Sir, this has a bullet hole through it."
"Ooohh, don't mind that Skeeter
was using it fer target practice one day." He pulled a bag of pork rinds
out of his desk drawer and offered some to Oink who gave him a horrified look.
"You'll be ridin with Skeeter for a couple days till we get the other car
outta the body shop. It had a little run in with a herd of cows."
"Cows?" Oink asked.
"Yep, one of the boys dropped
his Big Mac and before he knew it he was plowing through a farmers field full
of Big Macs still on the hoof. Skeeter is at the front desk, so when ever your
ready ta have the tour of the town just let him know."
Oink walked back to the front
of the Department towards the desk and shivered at the look of her temporary partner.
"Just my fucking luck! I get ta ride with Barney Fife's brother!" She
thought to herself.
Morigan swayed from side to side
on the living room floor, rolling forward onto her knees, she threw her hands
up towards the ceiling and yelled.
"WILL YOU GET YOUR HAIRY
ASS OUTTA THE WAY!!!!!"
Jessica kept jumping up and down
in front of Morigan trying to grab the Nintendo remote control out of her hands.
"Ya little shit! Where's
your mother at?" Jessica ran for the steps and stopped at the top to wait
for Morigan. When she got into the kitchen Jessica was sitting in front of the
cabinet where she and Stacey hid their chocolate chip cookies. "We don't
have any dog bones, so what do you want?" Jess clawed at the door until it
opened. Then she started chewing at the can with the cookies in it.
"Now how do you know what's
"Ooohh that's easy, I could
smell chocolate buried in 2 foot of cement!"
Morigan jumped at the voice that
seemed to have come from the dog. "I've been playing that game to damn long,
now I'm hearing a dog talk!"
"I can play poker to."
Morigan spun around at the chuckling behind her.
"Thought ya were going nuts
"Jack you asshole!
Jack just grinned at her and thought
to herself how much fun it was to be around so many easy targets. "I knew
you and Stace had a hidden stash around here somewhere. So, I won't tell Mike
and Poni if ya watch my baby for me while me and Oink work tonight."
Morigan raised one eyebrow at
her, clenched her fists and mumbled to herself. "OK OK, but she better stop
trying to steal the control out of my hand!"
"Ooohh I forgot." Pulling
a little stuffed animal that looked like Sonic Hedgehog out of her pocket she
handed it to Morigan. "Give her this and she'll leave ya alone."
"Great the hairy little shithead
has a baby."
Mike and Morigan lay in bed spooned
against each other with Mike curled around Morigan's back, pulling her tight against
her chest. Pressing her face into soft blond hair she was just about to drift
off when she felt something walking up her legs. "Weasel, you awake?"
"Huh?" She mumbled from
"Something's walking on me."
"It's just nits or fleas."
Mike drew her eyebrows together
over her nose as she raised her head to look down at her now snoring lover. "I
do not have bugs." Just then something pounced in between them. Jessica's
brown eyes twinkled up at her, little white teeth showed as she grinned at Mike
from around her hedgehog. She dropped her baby on Morigan's neck, circled around
and plopped down so that her head rested on top of her baby. Exhaling and making
Morigan's hair stir she closed her eyes and went to sleep.
"Just great, I get ta share
my wife with a spoiled dog."
Poni lay on her back snoring like
a huge bear, her arms thrown out to the side of her body and one of them pinning
Stacey to the bed on her stomach. Squirming out from under the heavy arm Stacey
fell to the floor. She made her way to the bathroom and searched through the medicine
cabinet and drawers. Not finding what she was looking for she ran down to the
kitchen to search in the junk drawer. Finding something she could use she ran
back upstairs to their bedroom. Leaning over her wife she worked slowly, when
finished she rolled her over and climbed back in bed and went to sleep in the
now peaceful room.
Oink sat in the Hoopety waiting
for Jack to show up with the last of the cars for the night. They had already
gotten 4 from the racetrack parking lot. At work she was trying to download all
the personal files into the computer at Mike's by way of e-mail. And then cover
up the tracks that she would have left, even though it was kind of dumb considering
the IQ's of everyone there added up to a minus 20. She was trying to find out
who was deleting the files about the car thefts and then connect that person to
security guard and the other guy that they where working for. Not to mention all
the way to the car theft ring in Virginia. But she needed help from a computer
tech and the only one she knew was in Texas and that was to far away to go for
help. She'd have to ask Jack, that in it's self was asking for trouble. She heard
the screeching of tires and then headlights flashed across her rearview mirror.
Before she could do anything she saw Jack jump from the car just as red and blue
flashing lights came into the parking lot from Rt. 340. Jack took off at a full
sprint towards the side of Walmart, weaving in and out of parked cars until she
hit the side of the building and disappeared into the night. The Police cruiser
stopped beside the stolen car, Oink could hear the radio squawk and then one of
the Officers that she hadn't met yet get out and search the car with his flash
light. He then pulled a cell phone from off of his belt, made a phone call and
returned to his car after locking the doors on the stolen one. Oink waited a few
minutes then started her car and drove around the back of the buildings looking
for Jack. She had reached the last of the buildings when a donut bounced off of
her windshield. Looking to her left she scanned the edge of the building and didn't
"Looking for someone?"
Jack said from her hiding place.
"Where the Hell are you?"
"Up here looking at the stars."
All Oink could see were Jacks
boots hanging over the edge of the buildings roof.
"How the Hell did ya get
up there ya simple bitch? And better yet, how ya gonna get down without breaking
both of your scrawny little legs?"
"Uuuhhhmmm.... Your gonna
catch me?" She replied with a big grin on her face.
"I don't even think so. You
better pull out those little fairy wings and fly down here. Ohhh wait your not
a fairy, your a flying fucking monkey!"
"And your still waiting for
that heart. Pull your Hoopety over here and let me jump down on it so we can go
"Not in my lifetime!"
Jack looked around trying to figure
out how she could get down. The only way she could get down was the way she got
up and that was by way of the Dumpster. Hanging by her fingertips she tried to
judge how far to swing out to land on the top of the Dumpster. She misjudged and
when she hit one foot landed in open air, throwing her off balance she fell into
"Son of a bitch!" She
grumbled as she pulled her way out. Jumping into Oink's car she got a look that
could have sent her six foot under if not for the fact that it disappeared when
she handed over a bag with three boxes of Krispie Kreme donuts in it.
Oink had one hanging out of her
mouth as they pulled away from the building.
"What luck, I fall in a Dumpster
and find 3 boxes of your favorite donuts."
Oink started choking and the next
thing Jack knew donut was being spit all over the windshield.
"Just kidding Oink! I wouldn't
do that ta you."
Oink spun her head around to glare
at Jack, flames dancing in her brown eyes; lifting one corner of her lip she flashed
a canine at Jack as a deep growl rumbled in her chest.
"Ohhh goody! Can ya make
your head spin even if I didn't bring ya pea soup?" Asked Jack.
"Your asking for an ass kicking
with a big stick filled with lead!"
"Kinky!" Jack grinned.
"Does it have any splinters on it?"
"Just shut up!" Oink
put the Hoopety in gear and they headed home.
Hearing an annoying crunching
noise Oink glanced over at Jack and tried to figure out what she was eating.
"Jack, what are you crunching
on over there?"
"Want some?" She handed
Oink one of what she was eating. Holding it up in front of the light given off
from the dashboard she cringed at what she found.
"GROSS!" Tossing it
back she wiped her hand on her pant leg. "You're eating dog bones?"
"Not just a dog bone but
beef basted dog bones! I got them from a K-9 dog at the racetrack. The dog didn't
mind but the cop sure was pissed!"
"That explains why you came
into the parking lot like a bat out of Hell. Now your stealing a K-9 dogs bones
right out of a police cruiser! What's next, his collar?"
"Nope." Pulling something
out of her pocket and wiggling it in front of Oink. "Already did that. It's
a nice one to, has all these little spiky things on it. It'll look good on my
baby once I cut it down."
"You're going ta jail Jack,
right to the slammer full of big huge toothless women!"
"Ya think they'll have handcuffs
"Your hopeless Jack, just
plain hopeless! Speaking of hopeless, do ya know of any computer geeks around
"Not off hand but let me
The next morning everyone was
sitting around the kitchen table when Poni wandered down still in her raggedy
T-shirt and boxers. It never hit her that everyone was sitting on the side of
the table that faced the doorway that she came through. Everyone busted up laughing
at first site.
"What the Hell is wrong with
you people?" She asked in a grumpy tone.
"Not a damn thing Pon's."
Mike chuckled. "Just a joke that Stace told us about the many uses of duct
"Ohh, any coffee left?"
Minutes later they heard a yell
that shook the rafters. Then feet pounding down the stairs. A bare chested Poni
stood in the doorway, chest heaving, fists clenched at her sides.
"Stacey! What the Hell did
ya do ta me last night!?! I have duct tape across my nose and it won't come off!"
"Oooohhh baby!" Steve
gasped. "I didn't even notice the tape with you throwing your tits in my
face. If ya walk around that way all the time no one will notice the duct tape.
Maybe if Stace would paint it a flesh color it would look better."
"BASTARD!" Poni growled
at him. "Now how do I get it off and leave my nose on my face?"
"Come on baby ducky, I'll
get it off." Stacey gave everyone a big grin over her shoulder as they left
the kitchen. They could hear them talking as they made their way up the stairs.
"We need ta get some more of those breathe easy things for you."
"Did ya have ta use duct
tape?" Poni whined.
"Anyway, does anybody know
any computer geeks around here that can do some work on fixing a screwed up program?"
Jack asked skirting the real issue.
"Moi, what's the problem?"
"Don't know, gotta ask Oink.
It's her computer." Oink gave her a murderous look because she didn't want
the whole household to know what she was doing. They where all shocked as it was
when they found out that she had transferred to the Police Dept. there in town.
With it being Saturday, Morigan
was off from school and able to help Mike and Poni in the garage with the repairs
of the cars. They had a total of twelve sitting out in the parking area. And they
all knew that Oink and Jack had something to do with the amount of cars they had
been receiving as of late. It was scaring the Hell out of all of them. Morigan
as a way of keeping track of the cars had started writing down all the VIN numbers
and keeping all funds from these cars in a separate account at the bank. After
checking all the cars while they still sat in the parking area they had found
that most of them had expensive car alarms that guaranteed against being stolen.
And that they all were in the price range of over $25,000.00.
Morigan pulled Mike to the side
and spoke in a low whisper. "This isn't right, we're getting too many cars
here. Someone's going to get suspicious that we have so much work in such a small
amount of time. And that they're all expensive cars coming in here, my Gods we
look like a car lot!"
"I know Sweety, I'll have
a talk with Jack before she leaves tonight."
"And Oink being a Cop doesn't
settle to well with me either. I mean with all the dirty Cops around and we have
one living with us. Now I know she's not stealing the cars but she's helping Jack."
"I know, but what can we
do?" Mike asked. "Do you have that list of VIN's?"
"Yeah, it's under the file
'Weasel's gibberish' in the My Documents on the computer."
"Print up a copy for me and
I'll give it to Jake, maybe he can check and find out about the owners. See if
they have heard anything from the Police about their cars."
Jake called back later that night
and let Mike know that he had ran the VIN numbers and had talked to some of the
owners concerning the theft of their cars. He asked them to make a copy of the
police report that was given to them and mail it to him at his office. He also
expressed his thoughts about what was going on at her garage and warned her about
being tied into the theft ring.
Steve was with Oink at her office
pretending that he had been sent by the computer company to check on a problem
with one of the programs that had been installed at the factory. He told the chief
that there was some kind of glitch in the system, that caused the PC's to crash
after so many megs was used on the hard drive. That he would need to take one
of the hard drives with him back to his office and reprogram it. The chief being
PC illiterate agreed. With the tower in hand he left to do his magic to recover
all the deleted files that Oink had asked him to find. What people didn't know
was that even if the files were deleted, they were still on the hard drive and
very easy to recover if you knew how to do it. Oink made him promise that he wouldn't
say anything to Mike or any one else about her looking into the car thefts. Or
she would turn Jack loose on him. That being scarier than having Poni get him
Oink was working on some paperwork
when the K-9 cop came in and went right into the Chiefs office. She could hear
yelling although the door was slammed closed when he went in. Unable to make out
what was being said she got up and pretended to look in the filing cabinet on
the wall that separated the two offices.
"Someone's gonna catch on!"
The officer yelled.
"Just take it easy."
The chief said. "These people are all stupid around here. They can't tie
us in with your dad over at the track."
"Right and how do we explain
that ALL of the cars are stolen from there, and every night at that! It's getting
"Just tell your dad ta ease
off, maybe take one from the Walmart parking lot."
"You tell him, he's your
brother and your partner! I'm only doing the reports."
"All right, I'll tell him
Oink ran back to her desk just
as the door opened. The Officer looked over at her then left. Collecting her ticket
book she went out to the cruiser that they had assigned to her. Cruising through
town she kept her eye out for the K-9 unit car. Pulling her cell phone out she
placed a call to her contact in Virginia.
Jake showed up at the garage with
his cruiser just as one of the guys was picking up one of the stolen cars. He
made note of what Jake looked like and the number on the cruisers plate. Using
his cell phone he called his boss and related the news to him that the garage
and the State cop may have to be dealt with.
Jake was amazed at how crowded
the parking lot was. Now he knew how bad the situation was. Pulling the sheets
of paper from his briefcase he walked into the garage to find Mike.
"Here's all the reports that
the owners sent me." Jake said as he handed them over to Mike and Morigan.
"The thing is that they are all signed by the same officer, A Sgt. A.J. Longer.
What is really strange is he's a K-9 unit officer and seems to work 24 hours a
day. Who I really need to talk to is Oink, since she's in the same office with
him so maybe she can find out some stuff for me."
Mike blushed at his request. "Uuhhmm,
she doesn't know that we have you looking into this for us and neither does Jack."
Poni and Stacey had been listening in on their conversation. And asked what they
could do to help him without pulling the garage into it. Morigan made it known
that none of them looked good in orange and group showers was not her idea of
fun. Jake assured them that he would talk to his Chief and Internal affairs on
everyone's behalf. And for now to just keep on picking up the cars, that he would
tell them when he had it set up to pick up the ones responsible for the car thefts.
"Uuuuhhhmm, well... that's
the problem." Mike hesitated. "Jack and Oink are the ones...well."
"It's like this Jake. Jack
steals the cars, Oink picks her up. So ya have a convict and a cop working together
Don't hurt my cousin!" Poni growled at him. "I don't like visiting prisons."
After Jake left they all made
arrangements for that night.
That night everyone took a different
vehicle, Mike and Morigan parked at different ends of the Racetrack parking lot
and kept in contact with the truck radios. Stacey and Poni where at the Walmart
parking lot in the area where they thought Jack would park the cars. At exactly
midnight Mike watched Oink drop Jack off at the Winners Circle bar. Within 3 minutes
she came back out and walked through the parking lot. 5 minutes later Morigan
called on the radio that Jack was in a car and on her way out of the parking lot.
Poni then called to let them know that Oink was parked and waiting. They watched
the entire night as Jack and Oink worked. And once during the time they where
there they saw a race track security guard walk across the street and go into
the bar then come out 10 minutes later. Ben had just received the last of the
keys for that night form the boss. He was just about to leave when his cell phone
"Is it done?" He asked.
"Both jobs? Good now disappear, I don't want ta hear from you for at least
6 months, your money will be transferred to your account in the morning."
Ben left the bar and headed right
for the casino part of the track where the boss would be sitting in his security
office. No one paid any attention to him since they all knew he was related to
the officer. Plopping down in the other chair he told his uncle that all was set
and they only had two more to take care of but that he would do that one himself
the next night.
Jake woke from being unconscious,
he didn't know how long he had been out but his chest and shoulder hurt where
the seat belt had cut into him. He couldn't feel his left leg where the door had
buckled in when his cruiser rolled and right now all he could think of was trying
to reach his radio and call for help. As hard as he tried he couldn't lift his
right arm. Blood caked his face from hairline all the way down to soak his khaki
tan uniform shirt. The radio mic he wore on his shoulder was destroyed so now
all he could do was hope that someone saw his car. All he remembered was making
the hairpin turn by the High school and then the sound of automatic gunfire from
his side of the car. Then nothing. He hoped that wherever his car sat that it
Everyone met at the 7-11 across
from Walmart and waited for Oink to pick up Jack and head home. Poni offered to
go to pick up a pizza at their favorite pizza place in Shepardstown while everyone
else headed home. Five minutes after they got home Poni called on the base radio
for them to call 911 and the State Troopers. And have them come to the field across
from the High School.
"Mike, ya better get out
here, it's Jake." She yelled over the radio.
Oink pulled the Hoopety up to
the back door and waited for everyone to jump in. Getting directions from Mike
she peeled down the drive way as fast as her car would go.
Poni laid on her side next to Jake's cruiser that was laying on its hood. Holding
a sterile pad to the gash on his forehead she tried to stop the steady flow of
"Who the Hell taught ya ta
"Mike did. Can't ya tell?"
He tried not to laugh because of the pain in his ribs. "Big mistake buddy,
she still has training wheels on her Harley." She looked up at the sound
of a cars squealing tires to see the whole household come falling out of the doors
along with the hairy little shithead Jessica. Right behind them was the ambulance,
fire dept. rescue truck and two state trooper cars. The paramedics working with
the firemen used all the tools they had to open the crushed door and then ease
Jake out onto a back board and into the ambulance that would take him to Jefferson
"Mike, look at the side of
his car. It looks like Swiss cheese."
Holding onto Morigan's hand Mike
made her way around the side of Jake's car, she was joined by Oink and Jack.
"It looks like someone used
an Uzi. Oink what do ya think?"
"I think we have a big problem.
Was he off duty?"
"Yeah, he works day shift. He gets off around 2pm. Why?" Mike asked.
Oink looked around. "Where's
your ugly little dog Jack?"
"Ohh I put her back in your
car. I'll get her, she seems to like me for some reason." Morigan ran for
the Hoopety and returned holding Jessica like she was a baby. "Put her in
the cruiser and watch what she does."
"Why was Jake hauling chocolate
cookies?" Joked Morigan. With in seconds Jessica went nuts, scratching at
the back seat and howling. Oink pulled her badge out and approached the troopers.
"We have some narcotics in
Jake's car. I think you guys had better take a look."
The troopers had all of the packages
of cocaine laid out on the top of one of the cars hoods. They found a partial
evidence tag stuck to the bottom of one of the packages.
"That right there is from
the evidence room in Charlestown." Oink said. "My office did not have
any drugs in the evidence room and from the records I've been going over it's
been years since any has been taken by the Charlestown Police Dept."
One of the Troopers wearing Sgt.
stripes leaned close to Oink. "And how long have you worked there?"
"About a week."
"Do you always check all
the records going back years at a new job?"
"Well, no but there's a good
"Really, and what might that
Oink pulled a thin leather wallet
out of her pocket and showed it to the troopers. "Jesus H Christ! Why the
Hell didn't ya say something in the first place Detective?"
"I've been working this case
for the last two years and this is as close as I've gotten to taking these guys
down. No one here knows that I'm anything other than a plain old officer in Charlestown.
Give me 48 hours to get my people here, I think I've got enough information to
take the guys here down and maybe get the connection in Virginia and Texas."
"OK, we really shouldn't
be doing this but we'll make an exception this time since you're a friend of Jake
and the Amazons. And I don't wanna piss Drake off, she'll kick my ass again."
"Thanks, Sarge I appreciate
When Oink got back to her car
Poni had Jake's cruiser on her flatbed and her and Stacey were on their way home.
She told Mike, Morigan and Jack that she had talked to the troopers about the
narcotics and that they were going to hold off on reporting it until they could
talk to Jake. Which wasn't true but better than blowing her cover. By now it was
already 4am and every one was wired. So when they got home they made a pot of
coffee and sat around the kitchen table after Mike called Jake's wife to let her
know that he was in the hospital, and a brief explanation as to why he was there.
Mike glared at Oink and Jack.
"You two tell us what the hell is going on! We watched you guys tonight and
we know that there's more to this stealing cars than what you've told us. So spill!"
Jack went to say something but
Oink slapped a hand over her mouth.
"OK, I'm working on a theft
ring and to be able to get in I'm using Jack to do it. But what happened to Jake,
I have no idea why they went after him. That is if it's the same guys."
Mike covered her face with her
hands. "It is, believe me. We all got worried so I called Jake and had him
looking into the VIN numbers of the stolen cars."
Jack looked from Mike to Oink.
"There's no way they could know what he was doing?"
"Wait!" Stacey held
up her hands. "He was coming in when one of the stolen cars was leaving.
Could that be it?"
"Shit!" Jack jumped
up from the table, snapped her fingers for Jessica and ran out the back door towards
"Now what?" Poni grumbled
as she to went out the door.
Jack had Jessica running through
Mike's garage searching through all the toolboxes, storage boxes and any place
narcotics could be stashed.
"Cookies Jess, you find the
shit and I'll get ya a whole damn box of cookies!"
She was just about to take her
into Stacey's garage when Jess started going nuts where Mike and Poni kept spare
tires hanging on a rack. Jack went over and searched through the tires and pulled
out a plastic bag that was 12 inches square containing a white powder. She picked
her dog up and gave her a big kiss on her head.
"That's my baby boo boo,
let's find some more shit. Here ya go Oink, when were done ya owe Jess a lot of
"My black ass I do! That's
"Uuuhhh aaaahhh, she's retired."
After 4 hours the whole place
was clean, including all the cars that belonged to the Amazons. In total they
had approximately 40lbs of all kinds of narcotics. Which added up to a jail time
that none of them would have ever seen the light of day for the next 10 lifetimes.
Oink called the trooper that she had talked to that morning and he came out and
collected the box with all the drugs in it, then she left with him to make out
a report to be filed through her office and theirs. No sooner had she left than
the DEA and the Charlestown Police dept. showed up with search warrants to search
all the buildings and the house. Sgt. Longer the K-9 officer showed up with his
dog but with the help of Jessica the male dog forgot what he was there for. Everyone
was kept in the kitchen while the DEA officers searched the place. After coming
up with nothing the DEA showed their displeasure to the Charlestown officers at
having to come all the way out there on a wild goose chase.
"I'm gonna buy Jessica more
cookies than she can eat in her lifetime!" Mike shocked everyone by picking
the little dog up and kissing her little sparsely hair covered head.
When Oink came back later that
afternoon it was to a house of very relaxed Amazons. She found them all in the
living room watching CMT. And doing no justice to the songs that they were
playing. They were so bad that even Jessica was covering her ears. Then it hit
her; they were singing one of Cletus T. Juds songs called "My cellmate thinks
"You guys suck!" She
said as she covered her ears.
"So do the cops!" Poni
yelled above the singing as she flew a paper airplane made out of the search warrants
over to her.
"Son of a bitch! I guess
we got them just in time huh?"
"Soooo, are ya gonna bust
those bastards or what?"
"Tomorrow night, it's all
set up with my people and the state troopers. You guys are all clear, and we've
talked ta Jake who sends his thanks to all of you. So tonight is Jack's and mine
last night stealing cars."
Mike pulled Morigan back against
her on the couch. "You two don't know how relieved we'll all be when this
is over. No more drugs, hot cars or relatives being shot at. We've all had enough
gun play ta last us a life time!"
"Ain't that the truth."
Poni replied. "But I'll miss all those fancy cars coming in here that's for
Oink grinned at her showing all
her white teeth. "How would you guys like ta work on all the Troopers cars?"
All eyes turned to her. "I
talked ta the big guy of the troopers and they've agreed ta give your garage the
contract ta fix all their cars. Starting with Jake's if it's fixable. If not then
here's the number ya call." She handed Mike a business card with the State
Troopers emblem on it.
"I don't know what ta say
"Not a thing Mike, it's my
thanks for putting up with me and Jack all this time."
"Am I interrupting anything?"
Asked Steve as he came down the stairs. "Oink, I've got some stuff for ya."
He showed her a whole package of papers. "I can explain them upstairs if
"No, that's OK. Everyone
here knows what's going on. Just tell me what ya found."
Pulling one of the top papers
off he showed her a name and their password.
"This is your man, he's the
one who wrote and deleted all the reports on the car thefts."
"Sgt. A.J. Longer, should
have known." She turned to look at Jack. "Your K-9 buddy, you know the
one that you stole the dog bones from?"
"Poor dog has ta put up with
that asshole. When ya gonna bust him, so I can steal the rest of the bones and
With out having had any sleep in many hours, the living room became a nap room
with the Amazons all snoring out of tune to the CMT channel. It was close
to 10pm when Jack woke to Jessica letting her know that she had to go out. While
she waited for Jessica to finish she gazed down the long driveway. As she started
to turn to go back in she caught movement out of the corner of her eye. Sneaking
over to Oink's car she pulled a pair of night vision goggles from the back seat.
She took cover behind the Hoopety then scanned both sides of the driveway. That's
when she saw the shine of a silver western belt buckle on one side and a figure
hiding on the other. Taking the long way around to the house she went to her car
and popped the hatchback open and pulled the floor up that concealed the hidden
area beneath it. Leaving it that way, she returned to the house to wake everyone
She shook Oink awake and told
her about what she saw, then she woke the rest of them up.
"OK, so what have ya got
planned for our little ambush party?" Mike asked.
Jack looked at everyone sitting
in the kitchen. Then hid behind Poni. "I think we should rig the Hoopety
to go down the driveway and draw their fire while...OOOOWWWW!!"
"You're not doing anything
ta my car! It's paid for and it's mine!"
"Come on Oink, it was paid
for back in the 70's! Plus they know what you drive."
"Absolutely NOT! We'll use
one of the hot ones."
OK, hold it." Stacey held
up her hands stopping the argument. "Me and Morigan will rig one of the hot
ones while you guys go out there and pretend the Hoopety won't start."
"And make sure you're loud
enough for those guys to hear ya. Come on Stace lets go play." Morigan got
up and pulled Stacey with her out the door.
Jack had disconnected some wires
under the dash and pulled fuses while they sat in the car so that it wouldn't
start. Then they made it look like they went into get Poni and Mike. So now Oink,
Jack, Poni and Mike all hovered around the engine of the Hoopety. Speaking loud
enough that the people in the next county could hear them. They walked to where
Jack's car sat next to the stolen car they were going to use. She rummaged around
in her hiding space in her car and came up with Oink's shoulder rig, 2 nine millimeters
for Mike and Poni, 2 shotguns for Stacey and Morigan and a double shoulder holster
for herself that had 2 Glock's hanging in it. Handing everyone spare ammunition
she then pulled out windbreakers for her and Oink.
"Which ones Oink?" She
showed her three different colors.
"The real ones. That ought
ta really piss everyone off!" Grinning Jack tossed one over.
"OK, here's what we'll do."
Oink whispered to them. "Stace and Morigan stay up here at the house, Poni
you go with Jack and Mike can come with me. We'll hide far enough back from them
so that when the car makes it's way down and they start firing our movement will
be covered by all their gunfire. Then"
"We jump the mother fucker's and beat the shit out of them!" Poni added.
"Close, just don't get shot
cuz I'm not about to face either one of your wives!"
"Ohhh scary thought!"
Jack looked at both Stacey and Morigan holding shotguns. The couples embraced
and shared kisses with their wives then made their way to join Oink and Jack.
Stacey started the stolen car up and faced it down the driveway. When the car
started to roll she jumped free and ran back to the house to where Morigan was
They got in position just as the
car came even with the hiding gunmen. As soon as they opened fire on the car they
were rushed from behind. The guy that Oink and Mike went after caught site of
Jack just as she moved. He raised up and yelled then started firing from the hip.
All Oink and Mike saw was Jack going down and Poni sliding in the grass to avoid
the shots coming her way. Mike's war cry split the night air as she unloaded her
9-millimeter into the guys back making his Uzi jerk up in the air and continue
to fire. Oink took a few shots at the guy across the driveway but couldn't tell
if she hit him, because her night vision was gone from the flash of the Uzi's.
Her and Mike ran across the road zig zagging to avoid any shots that would come
their way. When they reached the area where the gunman should have been all they
found was the Uzi. Standing still they listened for movement. They heard it down
towards the road out in the field. Screaming and yelling coming from three different
voices. When they got there they found Jack and Poni beating the shit out of the
guy and yelling. The screaming was coming from the K-9 Officer.
"You son of a bitch! You
put bullet holes in my new windbreaker!" Jack yelled as she punched him in
between each word.
It was now Poni's turn to pound
on him. "You shot my cousin you fucker!"
By now Morigan and Stacey had
showed up along with flashing blue lights from the State Troopers cars. Oink took
the nine-millimeter from Mike and stuck it in her belt and did the same with the
one that Poni had dropped on the ground.
One of the troopers pulled Poni
off and did the same with Jack. The minute he saw the Glock's on her he slammed
her to the ground and cuffed her. Another Trooper pulled the bloody K-9 Officer
up off the ground and shoved him into the back of one of the cars then cuffed
him to the ring in the middle of the back seat.
"Hey!" Oink yelled.
"Why did you cuff my partner?"
"Well, detective your friend
there has Glock's on her and we know she's a convicted car thief. That's why."
"Wait a minute here!"
Mike jumped forward. "We were told that we we're all safe from prosecution.
And now you're arresting her?"
We aren't the Virginia courts
want her. Were just detaining her until they get here."
"I swear Jack, next time
you had better tell the damn judge what the Hell your doing!" Oink reached
into Jacks back pocket and pulled out her wallet. Flipping it open she showed
it to the Trooper who had cuffed her.
"Jesus Christ detective,
your just full of surprises aren't ya?"
"Just one more!" Oink
held out her badge that she had hanging around her neck. "Make that Special
Agent Oinknowski of the FBI and Special Agent Poninger. I think ya can un-cuff
her now before she picks the locks on your cuffs"
"To late Oink." Jack
rolled up off of the ground and handed the Trooper his cuffs. There's another
one up the driveway there but he'll need a baggy. If ya want ta talk I'll be up
at the house."
The six of them walked up the
driveway towards the house; the only noise was a loud yelp from Jack when Poni's
foot connected with her ass.
"All this time you shithead
we thought you were a car thief!"
Everyone sat around drinking beers
in the kitchen when one of the Troopers came in. "We can take all your statements
tomorrow at the station, just tell the desk Sgt. that you're there to see me."
He handed Oink a business card and apologized to Jack then left.
"OK, you two. No more games!
Why didn't you tell us what you where doing?" Mike wiped her face with her
hands. "All this time we thought that we were going to lose the garage, house
Jack started first with her story.
"OK, Oink and I have been following these assholes for two years. First from
Texas where Oink played Texas Ranger and me as a car thief. We traced their connection
all the way to Virginia when we busted one of their guys and under stress and
electric shock therapy with a coil wire he gave up his connection there."
"Then I got to play Virginia
Cop in Fairfax and once again Jack as a car thief. We didn't know about the connection
here until we picked up on the car that Poni picked up. It had a Lowjack system
in it so we waited until it moved and then we followed you." Oink pointed
to Poni. "And had you arrested."
"So why did Jack steal my
"That's easy, if you couldn't
show a drivers license or insurance then VA would hold you until they had the
stuff. We didn't know that you had so many tickets, That alone would have done
it." Jack gave her a toothy grin. "But it was fun ta steal your wallet."
"And you two set it up that we would be put in the same jail cell. Why?"
"In case you were involved
with the ring, most people in lock up brag about why their in there but when you
thought it was for tickets and no license and had no idea what's so ever about
the stolen car. Then we knew you weren't involved."
Morigan leaned over the table,
her green eyes flashing at Oink and Jack. "So that just because Poni didn't
know didn't mean that we didn't. So we were all suspects until proven innocent,
"Pretty much." Answered
Oink. "It took all of two minutes to see that you guys weren't involved.
However, with Jack getting in with the guys here it became obvious that you had
worked on some stolen cars. So all we had to do was wait our time and take them
down. By the way that K-9 guy that you two beat the shit out of is the son of
the security guard that gave Jack the car keys. Ben is the son of the Police chief
and by morning we'll have the rest of the assholes all the way to the main guy
who arranges the transport to Mexico."
"Then what?" Stacey
asked from where she sat on Poni's lap.
"VACATION!" Jack yelled.
"I need it, after all I lost a brand new jacket out there."
"That's another thing!"
Poni leaned forward over Stacey's shoulder. "I saw you take like six rounds,
get thrown back about 4 foot and the next thing your hauling ass across the field!"
"Ooohhh, I forgot."
She pulled her sweatshirt off over her head and showed them her kevlar vest with
the holes in it. She pulled the Velcro open and showed them the vest beneath with
just a few small indentations in it."
"Hey wait a minute!"
The whole table erupted. "We went down there with no vests on and you had
"Tell them Oink!"
"Jack always gets shot! I
could take her to a Burger King and someone would pull out a gun and shoot her
just for the Hell of it."
"I just have that kind of
face." She grinned.
Mike looked at Jacks arms from
shoulder to the black bracers on her wrists.
"Maybe it's all the Tattoos
on ya that doe's it?"
"Hey wait a minute, why do
you have my wives face on your arm?"
"Ohhh shit! Poni, Stace.
"Your looking at the village
cohorts, Sweety remember the trouble makers that always ended up in the village
"Them?" Morigan covered
her eyes with one hand. "It never ends does it? And the other picture on
your arm, who's that?"
"Ma. Or should I say what
she looked like way back then anyway." Mike answered.
"The others I drew up and
had done, ya know once ya get one it becomes habit forming."
"She has one someplace that
hasn't been seen in years to." Laughed Oink. "It's my foot print from
the first time she got shot."
The next day the temperature climbed
up to 80 degrees so everyone either sat in lawn chairs or laid out under the sun
trying to get rid of their pasty white skin. With the exception of Oink who had
sunblock 10 thousand on. And was sitting under and umbrella to keep the sun from
hitting her. Poni grinned at her handiwork on Stacy's sunburned back. In white
letters it said MINE. What she didn't know was that while she was sleeping her
wife wrote "baby ducky" on her back with chapstick. Mike didn't pull
such childish games on Morigan but she would be looking for paybacks when she
noticed that every toenail was painted a different color, thanks to Stacy's acrylic
collection that Morigan had borrowed. Jack kept spraying herself down with a spray
bottle that she had to keep herself cool. But Oink had taken it upon herself to
help out her cohort and add a special mixture to it. The only one who was completely
safe was Jessica who had on a pair of sunglasses and a baseball hat to keep her
head from burning. She laid under a tree chewing on a beef bone that was 4 foot
"Look at all the white sand
and the sound of the surf is so calming." Sighed Jack as she took another
drink of her Fosters beer.
"You need ta get outta the
sun Jack!" Morigan said with a chuckle. "That white stuff is concrete
and the water noise is the garden hose leaking where you ran it over with the
Mike rolled over and stretched
out onto her back. A huge smile graced her lips when she turned her head to look
at Morigan. "Two more days and we're all beach bound!"
"Five days just slumming
around at Myrtle beach. Right Mikey!"
"Yep, and anything else ya
wanna do Weasel."
Days later with the Hoopety packed
the Amazons and the Cohorts took off for a long awaited vacation. Or so they thought.
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