Just a Breath Away

By Colleen


Go to Part 1

This is an alternate uber story. The physical descriptions of the two lead characters may remind you of two others we all know and love, but all characters in the story are from my own imagination. This story is an original work and is copyrighted by the author. It cannot be sold or used for profit in any way. Copyright July 2009-2010

This story depicts a loving relationship between two consenting, adult women and contains scenes of intimacy, but nothing too explicit. If you are under 18 years of age or if this type of story is illegal in the state or country in which you live, please do not read it. If depictions of this nature disturb you, you may wish to read something else.

Feedback will be welcomed at Khall828@earthlink.net

I have also created a group for discussions of this, past and future stories. Join us at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/colleens_corner


Chapter 18


Summer had peacefully faded into fall. There were no more tornadoes. No more life threatening accidents. And definitely no more sudden appearances from ex lovers. Although on that account, things with Carol were going very smoothly. She did return to California, after receiving some encouraging news from her doctor. But she came back to Illinois in the middle of September for a happy visit with Logan, playing with him in his room most of the time. Drew was cautiously accepting of the arrangements they had made with their son's biological mother. Even if she didn't completely trust Ms. Chasen, she did trust her partner's judgment. But Drew would always be very protective of her family.

* * *

On Halloween, Carson and Drew took Logan out for an early trick or treating, to uncle Duncan's, then to uncle Brett's and finally to see his grandparents. Logan was very impressive in his little scarecrow costume, and he scored some yummy, toddler appropriate goodies. Carson and Drew had recently been singing songs from the Wizard of Oz in preparation for Logan's first viewing of the beloved movie, and decided to go with that theme for his Halloween. They did, however, refrain from dressing as Dorothy and the Tin Man...Drew absolutely refused to wear a blue checked dress and pig tails. The doctor did teach the toddler scarecrow a dance, so he could ease on down the road, which he performed three times, with her help.

The cameras flashed numerous times, as if the baby was a star on the red carpet. But to his family, Logan was exceedingly more important than any celebrity. While prince Logan was enjoying his time in the spotlight, Carson stepped into another room and snitched some kisses, those of the chocolate variety, when her mother wasn't looking. She stuffed the candy into her pocket just as arms wrapped around her from behind.

“I saw that,” Drew whispered, as she hugged her smaller lover.

Carson turned in her arms, wearing her best innocent expression. The doctor giggled and leaned down to capture the smiling lips. They were alone in the room, so they allowed the kiss to deepen. The intensity of their new passions was still sometimes surprising. They could get lost in time just kissing…savoring the sweet sensation of lips sliding against lips, one breath and another meeting and merging into an individual force. And the taste… Carson pulled back, her green eyes flashing with mirth. “And who's stealing kisses?” she asked, enjoying the residual taste of chocolate on her tongue.

Drew gave her a saucy grin. “A kiss a just a kiss.”

Carson started to give a smart retort when something crashed into her. Logan nearly climbed up her leg as grandpa chased him on all fours. “Dad!” Carson admonished with that certain tone, “why are you scaring him?“ She picked up her son, but he immediately wanted back down, where he ran back over and kissed his grandpa. “Oh, is this a game?”

“Of course,” Carson's dad said. “I would never scare my little buddy.”

Drew grabbed Logan's jacket and proceeded to dress the enthusiastic wiggle worm. “I hate to break up this game,” she said, “but we should get going. We don't want the house to get egged,” she joked.

“Then we'll have a free breakfast,“ Carson joked.

The little family soon headed for home and more fun. Just before he got in the car, like any seasoned trick or treater, the tyke shook his goodie bag to test the weight of his booty…or maybe he just liked the sound it made.

* * *

Once back home, Drew stayed to hand out candy to their young visitors, while Carson took Logan to half a dozen homes in the neighborhood, to people they knew really well. It was just for fun and to show off how cute he looked in his costume.

With his first trick or treating experience successfully completed, Logan toddled into the house, dragging his candy bag behind him, looking for his other mama. “Hey big guy!” Drew said as she lifted him into her arms. “Did you have fun?” He didn't have an answer, of course, one because he could barely talk, and two because he didn't even understand what was going on…he just went with it in his carefree manner. He held up his goodie bag for her inspection. The rather small tote didn't have much inside, but Drew expressed her enthusiasm as any good parent would do. “Wow, that's some delicious looking candy son. And since we both know your mother doesn't want you to eat any of this, I'll just take this off your little hands.”

“And share it with me?”

Drew turned to Carson and kissed her. “Of course Honey, I share everything with you.”

“Awww, that's sweet.” Carson took the baby. “Let me get him undressed.”

“I'm gonna set things up, hurry back.” Drew had carved a big jack o lantern and couldn't wait to show it to Logan. She had to answer the door twice before Carson and Logan returned. But when they did, the baby was in his pj's, looking just a bit tired, but not down for the count just yet. Carson had a seat at the kitchen table across from the artful pumpkin, with Logan on her lap. Drew turned on a small light and placed it into the back of the orange gourd. She flipped off the room light, allowing the happy jack to be the center of attention. Logan's green eyes popped as he watched the slowly blinking, color changing light show. He barely moved as the mirthful, but silent visage stared back. After about ten minutes, Logan clapped, thinking the show was over. Drew laughed. “Well, I'm glad you were impressed.” Carson clapped along with her son. “You too,” Drew added.

Carson put Logan on the floor to play with a little stuffed ghost he had gotten from his grandpa. She unwrapped a plate of cookies and set up the coffee pot as Drew went to the door. Carson jumped when Drew snuck up and reached around her to grab a cookie from the tray on the counter. “Geez, are you part cat or something?” Carson asked jokingly. It wasn't the first time the doctor had managed, unintentionally, to startle her partner. Drew whispered something naughty in Carson's ear, feeling the heat coming from the now blushing face beside hers. “Well, …I…I…” Carson stuttered. “I think we should explore that later.”

Drew chuckled. “What did you get this little thing for?” she asked as she examined a small pumpkin sitting next to the cookies.

Carson shrugged. “I don't know. I just thought it was cute.”

“Let's give it to Logan and see what he does,” the doctor suggested. Drew walked across the room, took a seat on the floor next to Logan and handed him the small holiday gourd. “Here buddy, what do you think of this?”

The baby took the pumpkin, which was slightly larger than a softball. Not sure what to make of it's weight, Logan set it on the floor between his outstretched legs. He studied it silently, tipping his head to one side and then the other. When it didn't blink like the bigger one had, he slapped on it several times. It didn't move or make any noise, but something else did. “Whoops, be right back,” Drew told him as the doorbell rang again. Logan awkwardly picked up the sphere and fell back onto the floor, hugging it to his body, but it didn't lick him on the face like dogs had done before. So it wasn't a dog. Bored with the inanimate orange toy, Logan abandoned it and went to see mama, pointing to the cookie in her hand. Carson broke one in half and handed it to him. As he munched on the treat, Logan walked back over and decided on a new use for the tiny pumpkin. He sat down on it, turning it into a little throne. Luckily it didn't have a stem. Mama laughed and snapped yet another picture. With his cookie gone, Logan lay back down and wrestled with the pumpkin some more.

“Two or three more and we'll be out of candy,” Drew said as she put the nearly empty bowl on the kitchen table.

“And I thought I was getting too much.”

“We could always hand out money,” Drew suggested.

“Ahhh, no. We'll just do what I've always done before, turn out the lights and go to bed.”

“At 8:30?”

Carson leaned close to the seated doctor. “I said go to bed, not to sleep.”

“Oh right,” Drew agreed. “There is that book I wanted to start.”

Carson smirked and slid onto Drew's lap. “Read this doctor.” She proceeded to kiss Drew senseless, hoping that when she looked up again, Logan would be asleep.

When Drew could breath again, she thought aloud. “I'm not sure I'll remember how to read after that. Lights out!”

* * *


Drew popped her head in through the back door. Carson was putting away the clean dishes from washer and saw the flash of dark hair from the corner of her eye. “Hey Sweetie, would you like some coffee or hot chocolate?” she asked, knowing that her partner had been working in the back yard, in the mid November chill.

“No, not yet,” Drew said. “Grab your jackets and bring Logan out here for a little while. I want to show him something.”

Carson giggled at her partner's exuberance. “Okay. Be there in a minute.”

About five minutes later, she stepped onto the back patio. Logan began bouncing in her arms when he saw his tall playmate, who was standing in the middle of the yard next to a huge pile of colorful leaves. Carson immediately noticed the mischievous twinkle in those blue eyes, and knew what she was planning. “Drew, you're gonna have to rake those all over again.”

“That's okay, I've got all afternoon.”

Carson grinned. “Maybe I had other, more intimate plans for you.”

Drew returned the sexy smile. “We can do that too.” Then she jumped into the middle of the dried foliage, propelling several individuals through the chilly air.

Logan practically jumped from his mama's arms, wanting in on the fun “Okay, here you go,” she said, lowering the baby to the ground. “Go get Mama Drew.” He ran as fast as his tiny legs would go, reaching his buddy and falling down on top of her with a heavy flop. Drew knew they needed to be careful because of his asthma, but he actually hadn't had an attack in a few months. She hefted him above her head and they jabbered in what sounded to Carson like a secret code. Drew sat him down in the leaves and they played around for a few minutes, with Drew piling the crackling pieces on his head like a golden crown . He looked at her with a big grin, then reached for some leaves of his own. Logan crunched a few handfuls, watching in amazement as the decimated bits fell slowly from his little fingers. Drew stood aside and let Logan bounce around in the autumn fun for a while, just watching as Carson was snapping pictures. The doctor then whispered something to Logan and he climbed to his feet and rambled over to Carson. He tugged on her hand, pulling her over as Drew had instructed, but then he got interested in something else and decided to let his parents play by themselves.

“You're missing all the fun mama,” Drew said, pulling Carson into a hug.

“Oh, I'm having fun,” Carson said with a smile. “I love watching you with him. I couldn't have special ordered a better parent than you.”

Drew sighed blissfully. “I love him. I don't think anyone can imagine exactly what it's going to be like being a parent. It's definitely scary, knowing you are going to make mistakes, but trying your best not to.” Carson agreed with a nod. “But I can't even tell you how utterly happy it makes me being his mother. Thank you.” Drew leaned down, giving Carson a tender kiss. Knowing that Logan was elsewhere in the yard, Drew gently tumbled them into the cushioned mound of leaves. The continuing kisses were soft and tranquil, but intertwined by a soul felt love.

Momentarily distracted by their passions, they didn't hear Logan walk up. He unceremoniously dropped a big bunch of the discarded leaves on top of the their heads and proceeded into a giggle fit as he launched himself on top of his blonde headed mother, chanting, “Mama, Mama, Mama.”

The ladies parted from the kiss with laughter. “The joys of parenthood,” Carson stated succinctly.

With a puff from her lips, Drew blew away a piece of the dried up flora from atop her nose. “Well, I guess I earned that,” she said while still spitting out bits of nature. She smiled up at her lover and began plucking things from Carson's windblown hair. “I've fallen and I don't want to get up,” Drew quipped.

Carson giggled, returning the banter. “Don't ever leaf me.”

“Oh baby, your leafter warms my heart.”

Carson grimaced at their bad attempts at humor. “I think we'd better take this comedy fest inside.” She climbed to her feet, followed closely by the doctor. After another quick kiss from Drew, Carson scooped up the tot and kissed his slightly chilled cheek. “I know you're having fun,” she told him as he protested, “but I think you've had enough time in the wind. I don't want you to get sick.” As she approached the back door, Carson noted that the former trio was now a duo. She turned back to ask, “Aren't you coming Drew?”

The tall woman retrieved her rake. “I'd better finish what I came out to do.”

“Well, don't be too long,” Carson said. “I don't want you to get sick either.”

Drew snickered. “Yes mommy.”

Just before closing the door, Carson taunted, “I'll show you a mommy when it's bedtime.”

Drew began pulling the scattered leaves back into an orderly pile, laughing to herself. “Maybe she'll tell me a story. Mother Goose, the grown up version.”

* * *


“ I have so much to be thankful for this year,” Drew said as the whole family was gathered around the Thanksgiving dinner table at Carson's childhood home. “Meeting Carson and Logan,” she continued. “Falling in love with Carson and Logan. Having this beautiful, wonderful woman fall in love with me.” Drew tipped her head skyward. “Most of all I have to thank that God, as I do every night for saving Carson's life.” Her eyes met the green orbs she loved. “ I have a new family who will ensure that I'll never be alone again.” Being the final member of the family to offer her thankful, holiday sentiments, Drew took her seat next to Carson, with only Logan in his highchair between them. They took turns helping their son with his meal, while they laughed and talked with the others. The love between every member of this family was always felt and freely expressed.

* * *

It was an unseasonably warm enough evening to sit in the back yard wearing just a jacket, so that's exactly what Carson and Drew were doing. Logan was asleep in the bed his grandparents had for his sleepovers. He had a full day, playing with his cousins and his grandpa. Drew and Carson felt like they had hardly seen him all day, except at mealtime, but after that he was off to play again. Even though they missed their son's presence, the couple always enjoyed their time alone.

Drew's long legs were just slightly propelling the wooden swing back and forth, the gentle motion adding to the lassitude from the big poultry dinner. It would probably be the last time anyone used the swing for the year, since it would soon be taken down and stored in the garage for the winter. Drew loosely held her beautiful lover's hand, always craving her touch. The sky was clouded, allowing for the nice temperature, but the moon would occasionally peek through, bathing them in the softest glow. The light shining out from the back windows of the house was enough to fully illuminate the doctor's face. And as Carson studied that profile, seeing in her mind's eye, as those intense blue eyes would peer into hers, revealing such emotion, and when that smile would fill her heart to bursting with love. Carson suddenly felt a jolt somewhere deep inside. It wasn't a physical sensation, but an intense emotional one. Carson's spirit was light and rejuvenated. It was a surprising realization. She knew just how deeply she loved Drew, but this was a final piece of healing that she needed for herself…for her spirit and her soul. And she knew it was all because of this woman's patience, loyalty and absolute love. Carson snuggled into Drew's side, enjoying the giddy feeling and wearing a big, elated smile.

Drew leaned down and kissed the top of the blonde head. “Do you think anyone would notice if I pilfered another piece of pie?” she whispered.

“My mother wouldn't care if you had a whole pie all to yourself.”

“I know, but I don't want to look like a pig. But it is a holiday, and they were just sooooo good.”

Carson giggled in her adorable way. “I'll sneak in and get us both a piece. What kind would you like?”

“Surprise me.”

Carson returned just minutes later with a tray of sweets and coffee. “I got pecan and apple,” Carson informed. “We can share.”

Drew stole a kiss before accepting a forkful of pecans and sugar. “I love how ingenious you are,” she said before chewing.

“I love you,” Carson stated easily. “That's why I wrapped up two more pieces for us to take home.” Drew's eyes said thank you since her mouth was full from another bite.

Carson wiped away a smudge of apple goo from the corner of Drew's mouth. She then licked it from her thumb. “Mmmm. Even more delicious.” They shared a kiss and more pie.

With all the dessert gone and appetites once again satisfied, they sat back in the swing with cups in hand, enjoying the peace of the quiet night. “Do you think you might be able to take some time off?” Carson asked.

“I suppose so. When?”

Carson had a plan formulating in her head. “Right after Christmas…until the new year,” she said.

“Okay,” Drew agreed readily. “Why?”

“I just thought we could use a vacation. A real, get away from home, just the two of us vacation.”

“Sounds good to me. Where do you want to go?”

“Oh, I can't tell. It's part of your Christmas present. But I promise, you'll love it.”

“Sweetie, we could pitch a tent in a cow pasture and it would be paradise, because I'd be with you.”



* * *


Drew took another sip of coffee from her new cup, which was a present from Logan. The heavy mug had a picture of the baby and the words ‘My Mama' imprinted on its side. The tot did have just a bit of help picking out and purchasing the gift, but Drew loved it and insisted having her first coffee of the morning from the precious present. She was now enjoying the quiet from her spot on the sofa, watching as the tot ambled around the family room playing with his new toys and the wrinkled sheets of paper and discarded boxes. It was a wonderful Christmas morning, the first of many, many more to come for the happy family.

Drew reached behind her and peeked through the curtains at the winter snow covering the backyard. “There must be at least four inches out there already,” she said, “and still falling.”

“It's gonna be a beautiful day,” Carson said as she snuggled up with her dark haired lover. She was wearing two of her Christmas presents. On her feet was a pair of fuzzy, neon green and orange slippers. She was always complaining of cold feet, but these were bound to keep her tootsies toasty through the cold winter. Once again, Logan had gotten help, but Drew insisted that he had picked the flashy color. One of Carson's gifts from Drew was secured around her wrist, a bracelet with half a dozen rose gold colored charms, each representing a happy moment from their time together. Carson sighed. “I really missed the snow when I lived out west. It had always made me a little sad thinking that Logan was going to miss out on that.”

Drew kissed the top of the golden head. “I bet you'd like to build a snowman later, wouldn't you?” she asked.

Carson poked her in the ribs. “You played in the leaves, I wanna play in the snow.” Only I‘ll be creating a snowlady.”

Drew thought about that a second, then wiggled her dark brows. “Now that has possibilities.” she said, adding a saucy smile.


Carson giggled and gave her partner a squeeze, then they went back to watching Logan, who had gotten quite a few great Christmas presents himself. And he would have a repeat the next day as he started his week long stay with his grandparents.

When Drew had done her shopping for her son, she, of course, had been drawn to the toys she wanted to play with. So now Logan had a bag full of large sized Legos for imaginative building. There was a farm set with a barn, plastic fencing and chunky sized sheep, cows and horses. There was also a wind up tractor for pretend plowing. She also chose a set of four wooden puzzles, featuring themes from under the sea, jungle animals, construction vehicles and pets. Drew already knew that a train set was on the list for next Christmas.

Carson's choice of gifts leaned more toward the educational kind, but still fun. She got him a doll, so he could start learning to be a good father one day, although Carson knew that particular toy would probably be discarded in a few years for trucks and tools. A set of books with heavy cardboard pages, for reading…or chewing sat on the coffee table. Along with that was a specially bound book of classic fairy tales. This one would be kept out of reach of little fingers, only for mommies to read to him. Finally from mommy, was an electronic toy to teach colors and animal sounds. There was also a little plastic, indoor tricycle so he could scoot around the house. They had both chosen that one, plus a few other little things. All in all he scored well.

Logan was still in his warm winter jammies, playing with a new stuffed dog, a gift from Drew‘s partners at work. He was sitting on the floor, walking the brown, furry toy around in front of him. He then tried to feed it a candy cane. When that didn't work well, he brought the animal to his face and jabbered seriously at it, obviously admonishing its eating habits. The tyke was having fun.

Carson was thinking about getting up and getting another cup of tea. But she was incredibly comfortable right where she was, in the arms of the woman she loved. They weren't due at her parents for dinner until four o'clock and it was only mid morning. Carson yawned. I should gather up all this paper to take for recycling. But that can wait till…


“Is it too soon to think about expanding our family?”

Carson wrinkled her brow. “I thought we agreed not to get a dog until he's a few years older.”

“I'm not talking about a dog…or a cat,” Drew said smoothly. “I'm asking if we should have another baby yet.”

Carson was stunned, her first response was stuttered. “I…I didn‘t…I'm…”

“You know how much I love Logan,” Drew added. “I think I'm a good parent.“ A devastating thought entered her mind. “Don't you want to have a child with me?” Her tone was pitifully painful.

That hurt drove into Carson's heart. “What? No, it's not that Honey…you are a wonderful parent. I just…never thought about another baby. I guess with everything that's happened this year…”

“I understand,” Drew said, turning away with a despondent look.

Carson took a deep breath. Her heart was suddenly split with two different emotions. “Drew, look at me.” The doctor turned, trying her best to hide the hurt feelings. “I'm sorry,” Carson said. “It would thrill me beyond words to have a baby with you.”

Drew's beautiful smile returned. “Really?”

“Absolutely.” Carson leaned over for a loving kiss. “I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. It's true I hadn't thought about it, because, like I said, it's been a roller coaster of a year. But now that we are talking about it, I know it's a brilliant idea.”

“I'm glad,” Drew said. “We both have siblings, and we know how important they are to us…and sometimes how annoying.” Carson agreed with a chuckle as Drew continued. “I wouldn't want Logan to miss out on any of that.”

Again, Carson agreed, but then her expression slowly turned somber. And Drew soon realized why the sudden change. “How many doctors did you see about your fertility issues?” she asked as she took another sip of coffee.

“Just one. But he was suppose to be the best in California.”

Drew rubbed Carson‘s arm, comfortingly. “That doesn't always mean everything. I know you still want to experience a pregnancy. And I want that for you. So I will find the best specialist in the country, no the world.”

Carson hugged her tightly. “Thank you. I love you.”

“And I love you. And I would give you the world. So, if we find out that you definitely can't…I'll carry our baby, happily and proudly.” Drew leaned down and kissed her lover with a tender promise.

Drew looked over to the little boy on the floor. “Hey buddy, would you like a little brother or sister?”

Logan stopped rolling around with his toy and looked up at the sound of his name, giving a single muttered response. “Bubba.”

“Was that a request or a question?” Drew asked.

“I don't know,” Carson said with a chuckle. “But if I get a vote, I say a beautiful little girl…with dark hair and baby blues.”

To be continued

Return to the Academy

Author's Page