By Mezzo
mezzosmelodramas@msn.com
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A few hours later the girls'
apartment was wall to wall with people.Tori needed to get some air so she went outside.Spotting the
car they had rented, she sat on the hood gazing at the stars.
Whenever Tori
needed to think or was upset, she would always look to the sky and locate
her favorite star.
"MomŠ you said that if
I needed to talk to you, all I would have to do is close my eyes and you would
wrap your arms around me...Well I think I need you now mom.I have always wanted
to have what you and Daddy had. However, things just haven't worked out that
way.I thought I found it. But I never found the right time to express how
I was feeling to that person.You see momŠ It's Brett. I love Brett. I always
have and I'm afraid I always will.I can't remember a time when I didn't love
her."Tori took a moment to compose herself
not wanting to cry in case someone should happen by."A long time ago,
I made the decision to push her away. I didn't want to risk hurting her by
showing her that I was in love with her.She was so young and innocent at the
time and I didn't think she could understand.Today I found out, she's involved
with a woman. I keep asking myself, ŚWhat was it all for?'I feel so lost right
now, Mom. What am I going do? How am I gonna
live the rest of my life withoutŠ"
Just then, she heard someone
approaching her.When she turned around, she saw Brett making her way towards
her.
"Hey I thought I saw you
come out here. Is everything alright?"
Tori nodded, "Uh, yeah. Just needed some air."
Tori could smell Brett's perfume
from where she was sitting and it was taking all her will power not to throw
herself head long at Brett's feet.
Brett had seen Tori leave the party and hoped that she could finally have
some time alone with her.She missed Tori so much and wanted to talk to her.She knew that Jenna
would have a fit if she found out she was out here with her.But she didn't
care. She hadn't seen Tori in so long and wanted
to find out how she was.Maybe get some answers as to why they had not kept
in touch. Though she never would, she desperately wanted to tell Tori
how she truly felt about her.It's not that she didn't care for Jenna.Jenna
had come into her life at a time when she desperately wanted to feel needed.Brett
had never fully recovered from the loss of Tori.Although
her relationship was far from perfect, she had tried her best to make it work.
Brett had tried to date boys
as her mother said when she got to a certain age. Though it was a pleasant
experience, it just wasn't what Brett wanted.Every time she kissed a boyTori's
face would appear in her head.She would remember the tenderness and the safety
that she felt with
When Brett found out that Tori was going to
Her friends Alexi and Adrian had announced that they were involved with
each other when they were in high school.Much to their parent's horror, they
silently hoped that it was just a phase and would eventually die out. However,
what they felt for each other was undeniable. They had been close, like Brett
and Tori, since they were children and one
day nature just took its course.
Brett had always known Alexi and Adrian growing up.They were all the same age.But
they hadn't really become close until high school. They found out that Brett
was curious about their lifestyle and helped to explain things to Brett when
she showed an interest. When the time came, they all agreed that they would
attend college together finding a school that taught everything that each
had wanted to major in.
Brett had gone to clubs withAlexi
and
It was just recently that Brett
and Jenna agreed to move in together.Brett had started to see a change in
Jenna the moment she moved in. Jenna's possessive streak was starting to bcome
more prominent. Every time Jenna saw Brett talking with someone, she always
seemed to get jealous.
No matter how much Brett tried
to reassure her that Jenna was the only one,it never seemed to appease the
insecure woman.
Jenna
Carlisle had a rough childhood and had never received the kind of love from
her parents that she needed.She was passed on from family member to the next,
while her parents traipsed all over the world. Over time, Jenna became very
bitter and very rebellious, hanging out with a bad crowd.Fortunately for Jenna,
she was very intelligent but not so good for the people around her. Contrary
to what people would think, her grades were excellent. She was accepted to
all of the big schools.
At
age fifteen, she learned that the best way to get what you want from people
was to find the person's weakness and exploit it. Her parent's weakness was
their name and the luxuries that it afforded them.Therefore, she set out to
humiliate them in public.
More
than once, her parents received a call to school for a conference.
Every
time her parents went away she had outrageous parties, where no expense was
spared and made sure illegal substances were everywhere to be found.She would
even make the telephone call to the police herself.
Countless incidents escalated one after the other.Until her eighteenth
birthday, she received a large check for her college tuition and a note.The
note stated that every semester, she would receive from her parents: college
tuition, room and board, and an allowance.In exchange she was never to step
out of line, do anything to embarrass them, or step foot onto their property.If
any of these occurred, they would immediately cut her off without a second
thought.
She
was well on her way to destruction when she met Brett. Brett being a compassionate
soul tried to see past all of that.She took on the roll of pampering and nurturing
Jenna, taking the time to try and understand her. She knew what it was like
to be left out in the cold.Brett would not do that to Jenna.She would be the
one that made a difference in Jenna's life.She would be someone that Jenna
could count on.
Brett finally woke from her
reverie and looked up to see Tori looking at
her.
"I haven't had a chance
to wish you Happy Birthday, Brett."Tori brushed her hand across Brett's check.With that simple
gesture, Brett threw herself into Tori's arms breathing in the warmth that
Brett barely heard the next
words Tori spoke. "
You ŠareŠ aren't you?" Feeling Tori's breath against her ear,
it took a second to understand what Toriwas
asking her.Finally, it registered.Brett looked up and with a look of resignation
and a deep level of regret she answered, "Yes. ToriŠ
Yes, I am happy."Though she wanted to, Brett could not stay there any
longer without revealing everything that lay in her heart.She could not turn
her back on Jenna. Not when she tried so hard to bring Jenna to this point.However,
it didn't stop the fact that it would always be
Knowing what she felt for Tori was best left in the past,she
gathered her strength to allow Tori to walk out of her life again.
Besides, Toridoesn't
feel the way I feel for her. Brett thought to herself.She
still sees you as that little girl.Not the woman you wish she would desire.Brett
quickly chastised herself. Stop this Brett, you're with Jenna now.Stop
thinking about something you will never have.Dreaming about something Tori
will never feel for you.
She reached up and brushed
away the locks of hair that fell upon Tori's face. Looking into the deep blue
eyes that she would always love, she stretched up and gently kissed Tori on the cheek. Softly she whispered, "Take care of yourself, Tori."With one
last bone-crushing hug and a soft brush against Tori's lips, she said in a
whisper, "Goodbye, my love."Brett turned around in a blurred motion
and ran back to the apartment never looking back.
More than one tear fell that
night and the sound of two hearts breaking filled the air. Tori
walked alone for a very long time playing repeatedly in her head the look
that she saw in Brett's eyes. Is it possible that Brett feels the same
way that I do?Tori asked. But now you'll never know will you?You waited
too long and now she has found someone else.Brett's too good a person to leave
someone once she's made a commitment to.Tori ran down the darkened street and didn't stop until she
was breathless and her legs begged for mercy.She couldn't get far enough from
the pain and anger that was building inside of her.Angry
at her stupidity and pain from the loss of love that she would never have.
By the time the sun revealed
itself across the sky, coldness began to set over the frost-covered earth
and a broken heart. A new Victoria Hull was born that day, a
TO BE CONTINUED. Installment
Five