Xeno's Dilemma
Part 3

by Larisa

See Part 1 for disclaimers.

Days later the six of them walked through the door of jade's

"Geez, talk about gaudy, look at this place, it should be called al la Queen!" Xena shook her head at the sights before her. everything was red and gold fem. things, including the little g-stings the men wore, and I use that term lightly. as one of the g-stringed person walked up to them Poni looked over Brie's shoulder. "Queenie, I think the only real men here are us!"

Lisping | {when have you ever heard a woman lisp?} one of them approached.

"Can I help you ahhh.... ladies?"

Brie raised an eyebrow at him

"We're here to see jade, is he in?"

More irritating lisping. "I'm sorry she's not in but Sal will see you, please follow me!" Then he did the other irritating thing and sashay away.

Sol pushed to the front of them, putting one hand on her hip and doing that limp wrist thing she lisped. "Follow me ladies his his!" And sashay away.

Shaking her head Xeno looked to Eph. "She ain't right"

"Oh believe me I know, the scary thing is she gets worse!"

Groans were heard from the rest of them. They were led to an office in the back, stepping through the door there behind a huge pink desk sat Salmoneus .

"Xena, Gabrielle and amazons, dome in, welcome to jade's."

"Salmoneus, you still make an ugly woman!"

"Now Xena, I only wear this god awful stuff when I'm here." As he flipped a pink boa. "And believe me I walk with my back to the wall . Anyway Alphonzo will escort you guys to your rooms. And congrats on all your joining's, see you all later."

As Alphonzo escorted them to their rooms Sol walked behind imitating him the whole way, Eph walked behind everyone hiding her head in Poni's back mumbling her intentions of what was going to happen to her deranged wife. they all agreed to meet in two candlemarks in the dance hall downstairs. Brie and Xe stood with their mouths agape in their room. a huge round bed took up most of one wall, it was covered with dyed furs in the most god awful day glow colors along with pillows thrown everywhere. Silk robes laid across the end of the bed, and on the table laid a menu, Brie being the famous bottomless pit snatched it up.

"Xe, look room service, for the love of gods!" Her mouth fell open. "Xeeee, look at this!" Xe leaned over her shoulder and scanned the menu.

"For the love of gods, what is that stuff!" Xe exclaimed.

The two lovers cringed at the first one. gerbil race, three different sizes available. neither one of them wanted to know what the gerbils were for. Brie pointed to the sixth one. "That's us number six." Licking her lips she winked at Xe. "You know what leather does to me, especially on a certain warrior princess, skin tight, breast revealing, just thinking about it sends shivers up my spine."

Heads spun as five amazons and one warrior princess walked into the crowded dance hall. it was disco Athens style, music pounded, lights flashed as scantly clad male gender bodies gyrated with the music and each other, the few women that were there had taken over the far corner, and some of these women scared even Xena. there wasn't enough room for even air particles to pass between bodies. Brie held on to Xe's arm with both hands while her amazons surrounded their Queen and her champion. One dancer got to close and found himself flying without wings, it was that muscle spasm in Xe's leg again, it happens some times.

Xe walked up to a table full of the ugliest drag Queens in Athens. That eyebrow with the life of it's own shot up and a small evil smile crept across her fade. All that was left was a few feathers falling to the table from their boa's. As soon as they were seated a waiter appeared wearing miss matched cloths and armor, Brie's eyes bulged when she looked up into Joxer's fade.


"Gabby, what are you and Xena doing here?"

` She told him of their joining's and that this was a gift from Cupid, his fade was crestfallen along with his heart.

"I got stuck working for my brother for a while, I got in this fight with these really tough warlord types, so I'm scraping up enough money to get my bent sword fixed."

Xena smiled a very wickedly at him. "the healers here Can do that kind of surgery?"

"No, no, no, not that sword." He gave his little giggle. "believe me, Aphrodite has no complaints about that sword. If you know what I mean." He winked at Brie.

"That's not what Brie told me."

Joxer squinted his eyes glaring at Brie who smiled her innocence.

"You told! gabby I'm ashamed of you!"

"She has very talented toes doesn't she?" Asked Xe. Joxer giggled. "Oh yes, very talented indeed!" Brie was deep red by now, she knew she would have to explain to the others about the toe thing and jokers pocket.

"Joxer, bring us lots of port will you, I'm gonna need it after this little talk." Brie groaned and dropped her head to the table. Candle marks later the girls were quite drunk, groping hands and wondering feet under the table, who's feet were who's no one knew or dare at this point. Brie wanted to dance but of course Xe's answer was she doesn't dance. So it ended up the Queen and her amazons on the dance floor while the warrior guarded their table. The two couples were back to front grinding against each other while Brie just kind of jumped around. Athens would have another bad drop year! All was fine until this huge over weight bull Dyke from Hades approached Brie and put her hands on her. steam shot from Xe's ears, warrior mode kicked in as she headed for the dance floor. Standing in front of them she glared at the woman. the tipsy little Queen looked up into ice blue eyes.

"Hi honey, this is tiny, tiny this is my wife Xena warrior princess."

The woman's mouth dropped open, without a word she fled the dance floor. Xe pulled Brie into her arms holding her tight, Brie one not to miss an opportunity snuggled into Xe's breasts. Xe moved her hips against her, slowly grinding, they matched the others movements. Then Xe felt someone at her back, with lighting fast hands she grabbed hold of a leather top with poor Sol in it. "I love it when your rough, makes my blood boil!" Xe released her. "Sol you need help!"

"Nah, just 24 hours of sex would do. we have a new dance we want to show you." Signaling to Poni and Xeno, they moved behind Brie as Eph and Sol moved behind Xe, pressing their bodies against her the matched their grinding movements. "We call this the hero sandwich." Both lovers groaned, sweat was starting to run down the over heated bodies, the room felt like Hades itself. Leaning up Sol whispered in Xe's ear.

"Group sex in Queenie's room?"

"How about, group beating in Sol's room, aye?"

"Just kidding Xe, really!"

"Eph, your wife is making passes at me!"

I'll take dare of it Xe, I know just the punishment." Eph leaned forward and stuck her tongue into Sol's ear, who if not for being up against Xe would have buckled to the floor. Xe looked to a far corner, squinting her eyes against the flashing lights she tried to bring things into focus.

"Nooo, it can't be!"

Dragging everyone with her they pushed their way to the couple in the corner. There sat Jayce and on his lap dressed in drag was none other than Ares in a pink leather teddy and fishnet stockings. Ares turned at the sound of his name being purred from behind him.

"Xena! Centaur dung!" In a flash he was gone.

"Too late Ares, you've been seen!"

Brie swaying against her giggled. "Ares, the drag Queen of war!"

Another flash and Artemis appeared. "Hi girls, having fun? I know you have, I've been watching, especially Solari here!"

"Huh, why me?"

"You remind me of someone, and for the life of me I couldn't think of who, then it hit me, I have a surprise for you." She snapped her fingers and a bound up Cupid appeared beside her. "Go on Cupie dear, tell her!"

"Aunt a, do I....ouch!!!" Arte stood with a feather in her hand and was reading for another one to pluck when he gave in and spilled his guts.

"All right, Solari, I'm ahh, your daddy."

Solari's eyes rolled back in her head, then she hit the floor spread eagle.

"It seems that the little fence jumper here likes to jump the Hestian virgins, hence the drop in virgins and the growth of the amazon nation by way of orphaned female babies." More of his feathers hit the floor. "well, I gotta go see Hephestus about some chastity belts, later."

Arte was gone leaving Cupid still standing there all tied up. Xeno grabbed a feather. "Ok little brother, whats up with Ares, what'd ya do ta him?"

"Oh it will wear off, hopefully when his in the S&M room with some big guy named Bubba. I did it so that Xe and Brie could enjoy their honeymoon in peace."

Brie leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you."

Untying his hands and wings Xe gave him a hug. "I owe you one!" Cupid blushed then disappeared in a pink cloud.

They carried Sol back to their table, Eph got some ice and dropped some down the front of Sol's top, Sol smiled and without opening her eyes she gave away more of their secrets. "Lower Eph lower!" She got it all right the whole cup of ice in her lap, which brought her eyes open instantly.

"Now we know whats wrong with her, look who her relatives are, excluding me of course."

Joxer dame with more port, filling up all their cups he decided it was break time and sat with them. After a while he was like them feeling no pain. Hands dame over his shoulders running down under his metal tray armor on his chest, closing his eyes he sighed.

"I know those hands, Dite, pleeease not in public!"

Six sets of eyes bulged almost out of their sockets as they looked to Cupid in drag standing over Joxer's shoulder. Chairs fell back as six women ran from the room laughing.

Xe and Brie decided to stay away from the specialty rooms, instead Brie talked her into shopping. Now the other four were a different story.

Part 3

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